So, What Happens Next? (3/11)
Chapter Title: Mah'habara Subterra
Pairings and Characters: Lightning/Fang, Vanille, Hope, Sazh, Snow.
Rating: T (language, sexual references - overall M15+)
Word Count: 7,122
Spoiler Warning: Contains spoilers for all chapters of FFXIII.
Summary: The greater your anxiety, the closer to cie’th you become. Lightning is going to have to sort out her issues before they consume her. Old, bitter regrets, confusion, jealousy - the journey to Oerba is dangerous enough without being your own worst enemy. Part Three - It’s difficult to return to normalcy after what has happened between them, but Lightning isn’t giving in on this ‘normal’ business. The party presses onwards, and Fang wonders how to address the tension between Vanille and Lightning.
Fanfiction.net|LJ Vallis Media| Archylte Steppe|Mah'habara Subterra (current)| The Earthworks| Maw of the Abyss| Sulyya Springs|
A/N: …and it’s not by getting her Neapolitan on, not this time. ((laugh)) Decided to cut this right in the middle, as the length would be too much and you’d be looking at a whole ‘nother league of waiting for the next chapter. You can thank polkadot tiger for that one - thanks for the support, mate, it was truly appreciated. But seven thousand isn’t that bad, and I’m (slowly) working on the next.
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Morning on Gran Pulse always dawned far too bright and early, heralded by the howls of the lobos and the screech of amphisbaena taking to the air. Lightning groaned as the morning sunlight fell across her eyes, flinging an arm over her face in an effort to stop her eyes from burning. Her body still hadn’t adjusted to the time differences between Cocoon and Gran Pulse.
Groggily, Lightning rolled over. The ground was more uncomfortable than normal, and she’d been having a good dream, Lightning remembered vaguely. She remembered that there had been Fang, and she had been-
With a muffled oath, Lightning sat bolt upright, her bleary eyes desperately taking in her surroundings. A cave with a narrow entrance, and there was the scattered remains of a campfire outside. Her companion, and the very reason she’d been so far from base camp, lay about half a pace away from her. Fang was snoring softly, and her silken, blue sari had been stripped off and used as a blanket. It revealed even more of Fang’s lean, tanned legs, and the uneasy soldier twitched at the sight.
She quickly glanced down at herself - her white jacket had been thrown off to one side, her gloves and pauldron had been removed and her cape had become a makeshift pillow.
Lightning pinched the bridge of her nose, squeezing her eyes shut. Slowly, almost reluctantly, memories began to drift back into her mind. She remembered that Fang had followed her out into the Steppe, had forced Lightning to confess to that damned lingering attraction last night. Lightning had decided to let Fang kiss her, just to see how it was, and then…
She pushed her bangs out of her eyes in frustration, her mind still struggling with fatigue. Had they gone further? Surely she’d be able to remember that. Her mind searched back, going through everything she recalled from the night before, going step by step. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary.
Eden, none of it seemed real, except for that dull ache in her shoulder. A quick cure spell fixed it up, and the joint was as good as new again. Muttering softly to herself, Lightning had to admit that this time, Fang had been correct. Lightning’s focus had been scattered and it had rendered her magic near useless. Still, she’d have to get Hope to take a proper look at it later. Speaking of which, they really had to start moving back to base camp.
Beside her, Fang mumbled something incomprehensible. Lightning froze as the other woman grabbed her wrist, trying to tug her back down to the rocky ground. How Fang was still managing to sleep on the uneven stone was a mystery, Lightning noted in exasperation. But even with last night’s kiss, she wasn’t sure why Fang had decided to be so familiar with her -
“Etro’s hands,” Fang finally growled, rolling over and looking up at Lightning with a groggy but accusatory frown. Her hair was mussed, sticking up in a mix of clumps and tangled braids. “I can practically hear you stressing out already. What’s wrong this time?”
Ignoring the implied taunt, Lightning grabbed her white jacket off the cave’s floor and brushed it down, before shouldering into it. Pulling on her pauldron and buckling it into place, Lightning rose to her feet swiftly. Since the day had begun, there was no use sitting around this cave. There was still Sazh and the kids - she included Snow in that category - to think about, no matter that she still felt like sleeping for another few hours.
“We need to get back to the others, before they think something’s amiss,” she told Fang curtly as she slipped on her gloves, jerking her head in an explicit order for Fang to start moving.
Fang just leaned back on her elbows, not bothering to stifle the wide yawn that bubbled past her lips. “Can’t you ever give the drill sergeant act a rest? I like you better when you’re not being a pain in the arse.”
Lightning met her sleepy gaze steadily, resting a hand on her hip.
Over the past week and a half that Lightning had known Fang, she had proven to be a notorious over-sleeper. The promise of a day hunting marks, a direct challenge, or implying that Vanille was in some form of danger, were really the only sure-fire things that would rouse Fang early in the morning. The latter was a low blow, but every minute they spent here was another minute lost to the Focus. Another minute that the others could piece together the reason behind Lightning’s mood swings.
Just because she’d admitted the truth to herself and Fang, did not mean she was willing to share it with Snow, Hope, Sazh and Vanille.
Especially not Vanille.
“So you don’t mind leaving Vanille in Snow’s tender care, then? Hasn’t Vanille told you about the Hanging Edge?” Lightning asked slowly, turning away from Fang, confident that the huntress’ own insecurities and perpetual worries about Vanille’s safety would do all the convincing for her.
Behind her, Fang laughed shortly and levered herself to her feet with the aid of her spear, grabbing her wrinkled, silken sari off the ground as she went. “You ain’t nearly so subtle as you think you’re being, Light, but… I can kinda see your point. Snow’s a great guy, he’d do his best, but he’s just not someone I’d be all that overjoyed about trusting Vanille’s safety to.”
Lightning made a sound that was both irritated and amused. With the slightly paranoid way Fang had been roping Vanille into every party expedition they’d formed thus far?
“I had no idea,” Lightning answered dryly, scooping up Fang’s neglected pack and holding it out for the other woman to take.
Fang scoffed at her sarcastic reply, grabbing the pack from Lightning’s outstretched hand and tossing it unceremoniously to the ground again. Fang placed her hands on her hips and rounded on her, as if Lightning had just done something greatly offensive.
Lightning watched Fang’s antics with a raised eyebrow, trying to ignore the slight heat rising in her cheeks as the huntress’ eyes roved up and down her body. She cursed under her breath. Did Fang have to be so open about it all?
Eden, if Serah could see this - if even Hope could see this…
“So you want to go, then? Right now?” Fang’s voice was low, her tone almost mocking. Lightning scowled at her.
Trust Fang to find an invitation when none was ever given.
“Obviously.” Lightning kept her voice steady as she bent to grab Fang’s backpack again, deliberately ignoring Fang’s slightly annoyed look.
“Trust you to be difficult about this whole thing,” Fang told Lightning, leaning in a little closer, so close now that Lightning could feel the warmth from Fang’s body. The soldier fought to stand her ground, even if every single fibre of her body screamed violation of personal space. “Not even one quick taste?”
Lightning blinked, then felt the cool, rough cave wall bump up against her back. She mentally cursed in realization. Standing her ground? Eden, this was going to have to stop. Still holding Fang’s pack, Lightning crossed her arms against her chest. She met the other woman’s green gaze levelly, even though her entire body was roaring at her to push Fang away and reject the way her heart was fluttering at the unwanted - welcome - closeness.
“Why would I want something?”
In spite of all her best efforts, Lightning’s voice came out a little bit hoarse. That was also something that was going to have to stop. She was not some skittish, raw recruit who’d never been out in the field. Fang was too close, but Lightning was fully trained, and she was in control. She’d been taught to maintain a grip of steel on her emotions, and aside from a few slips over the past week, that hadn’t changed.
Cold and serene, like the edge of a blade… No matter how she scrabbled after it, the mantra fled Lightning’s mind with Fang’s next words.
“A kiss,” Fang murmured against her ear, her breath tickling the side of Lightning’s neck as the soldier forced herself not to lean into the unusual sensation. “Don’t you lie to me, Light, ‘cause you made a great show of enjoyin’ it last night.”
Fang was right. Lightning had enjoyed the kiss last night, probably more than she should have, she realized with dismay. Especially if she wasn’t planning on letting this become a permanent arrangement between them.
But the memory of the softness of Fang’s lips stood out like a beacon in her mind, the gentleness of the kisses, the strange sense of released tension in her chest after it was all done. But Eden, it really had felt good…
Lightning swallowed unsteadily, feeling far too aware of the closeness of Fang’s warm body. It was a sensation that Lightning wasn’t used to, but she couldn’t say that she disliked it. She met Fang’s green eyes, and she nodded.
“That a yes?” Apparently, Fang liked things being as explicit as possible, Lightning noted with a frown.
“What do you think-” The rest was silenced by the dizzying feel of Fang’s lips on hers once again.
Fang’s calloused fingers were cupping her face gently, running rough her wild bangs again. This kiss was nowhere near as gentle as last night’s kiss had been, but no less captivating. It was deeper, faster, and there was something about it that made the breath in Lightning’s throat catch and her heart pound. It brought to mind something else entirely less innocent than a simple kiss, she realized. In spite of herself, Lightning closed her eyes, felt her body responding to the sensations. She thought she could smell jasmine-
The absence of Fang’s lips was enough to jolt Lightning from her reverie, the suddenness leaving her breathless. As she watched Fang reach down to retrieve the backpack that Lightning didn’t remember dropping during the kiss, Lightning touched her lips gently. She scowled - why were her hands quivering? She clenched the offending hand into a fist, a futile effort to stop it from shaking.
Absolutely unacceptable.
The more traitorous part of Lightning’s mind noted that kiss had been over before it had even begun. Lightning stifled the thoughts quickly - she was being ridiculous. How much longer was she expecting it to last? She’d said it herself. They had to get back to the others, or Snow and Vanille would enrage the wrong monsters and they’d arrive to find utter chaos.
Besides, if Lightning wasn’t going to let this become a permanent arrangement between them, she couldn’t complain when the kiss was too short. She shouldn’t even be comparing the two, really. Lightning crossed her arms over her chest, wishing her heart would stop fluttering. Eden, she shouldn’t have even let that last kiss happen, no matter how much she’d craved it.
No more. Lightning’s will firmed. This ends now.
Before she got a chance to inform Fang that this relationship was not happening between them, Fang was waving for Lightning to follow her out onto the Steppe. The two women squeezed through the cave entrance, and emerged, blinking furiously, into bright sunlight.
The morning was truly underway, Lightning realized with a sinking sensation in her stomach, as she allowed Fang take the lead. When they finally got back to camp, no doubt there would be questions. Why did Lightning leave like that, why were they out all night when they weren’t even that far from base camp? Eden, she wasn’t even sure if she could look either Snow or Hope in the face as she was right now-
“You know,” Fang mused, her voice light and conversational as they began the trek over the grassy plains, back towards the Vallis Media base camp. “I think I kinda like you like this.”
Lightning shot a sharp look at the huntress’ retreating back, wondering what game she was playing at. She shook herself to clear her mind, to focus. “Like what?”
“Off balance and all cute-like.” Fang made the answer sound like it were the most obvious thing in the world, and she shot the soldier a knowing smirk over her shoulder. “Makes for a nice change of pace. Wonder how long it’ll last?”
Cute-like? Lightning looked away, fixing her gaze to the rocky walls of the gorge as they approached. They passed through the first of the rocky corridor without incident, deftly avoiding the group of flans that attempted to block their path. Off-balance was nothing but another word for weakness, something that Lightning couldn’t afford these days.
Lightning sighed. She didn’t have time for this mess either, and it was time she set Fang straight. No more flirting, no more touching. No more kisses. Lightning tried to ignore the way her stomach sank a little, tried to silence that old voice that always wondered, what if…
“Fang-”
“It’s gonna have to wait, Sunshine,” Fang cut in, shooting a level look over her shoulder as she waved a hand in the direction of the camp. “You got that damn stubborn look about you again, but if you hadn’t kindly noticed, we’re already in view of the others.” Suddenly, Fang grinned. “You want Snow to see you all hot under the collar?”
Lightning tightened her jaw. Damn Fang, but she was right again. Lightning’s stomach clenched as she spotted Hope and Vanille sitting together by the fire, saw Snow doing warm-up stretches, saw Sazh busily preparing the party’s breakfast. If she started arguing with Fang now, then the others might catch wind of what had happened.
Even worse, what would Vanille say if she learned the truth? Fang had sworn that there was nothing between them, but the two were so interconnected that it was impossible to separate one from the other. How would Vanille react to a revelation that Lightning was… attracted to her adoptive sister?
It was yet another mark against starting anything permanent with Fang. There were far too many complications to consider.
Ahead of them, Lightning could see Snow raise an ungloved hand in a warm greeting. Fang followed the direction of Lightning’s anxious gaze, raising an eyebrow.
“Loved the eloquence there. You got a real way with words, Light.” At Lightning’s continued silence as they neared the camp, Fang heaved a long-suffering sigh, running a hand through her wavy, dark hair. “You’re a li’l worried about Vanille. She loves a good bit of gossip. Been that way ever since we were ankle-biters in Oerba. But. Since this seems to be such a big deal to you, I’ll respect that. You’ve got my vow of silence on the matter, even when it comes to Vanille. Well, as much as I can, in any case.”
Lightning sighed, and was careful to keep her voice low, so as not to carry on the brisk morning breeze. “That’s not reassuring, Fang.”
Fang just shrugged. “Weren’t meant to be, now shut up and act normal if you don’t wanna tip Vanille off. She’s like a bloodhound with this kind of thing.”
The crunch of grass underfoot stopped Lightning from voicing her sharp retort, and she watched with carefully controlled detachment as Snow jogged over. In spite of his alertness, he still seemed to be missing his usual bandana and combat gloves. It must have been a late rise for the party this morning, since Lightning hadn’t been around to marshal them into wakefulness.
“Oh, hey you two! Was wondering when you’d show up,” Snow said enthusiastically, as he took it upon himself to escort the wayward party members back to the campfire. He pumped a fist as he saw Sazh beginning to dish out the warmed leftovers - probably what had been last night’s meal - into a number of old, chipped bowls they’d uncovered in the Pulsian ruins. “You’re just in time for Sazh’s breakfast bonanza. You guys must be starving!”
Lightning rested a hand on her hip, listening to Snow chatter away. It was reassuring - not because of what he was saying, but because of how normal it felt.
Lightning nodded to herself, feeling the tension between her shoulder blades easing. Everything was just as normal, and that realization made it easier to maintain the cool and militant collectedness that she prized. Silently, she took one of the bowls, and made her way over to where Hope had taken a seat at the fire.
Having already given her a quick wave when she and Fang had first entered the camp - his mouth had been too full of food to greet her - Hope leaned back as she took a cautious spoonful of the ‘breakfast’, his green eyes watchful and filled with unasked questions. Questions that Lightning wasn’t sure how to answer, either. Couldn’t they all be as self-absorbed as Snow was?
“You two were gone a long time,” Hope said quietly, his eyebrows creasing in a worried frown. “What was wrong?”
The food seemed to lose all taste as Lightning forced herself not to freeze, but never before had a simple statement seemed so threatening.
As if sensing Lightning’s heightened tension, Fang had wandered over, and in one lazy motion, had flicked Hope in the back of the head. He jumped, rubbing the new sore spot with a scowl.
“Enough of the doubting, kiddo. At least I managed to fix her up before she self-destructed on us all,” Fang told him with a smirk, clearly amused by the crisis she’d averted.
Lightning appreciated that she’d moved to head off the more awkward questions, but did Fang have to go and say it like that? As if her brand had been ready to erupt and turn her cie’th last night? She shot Fang a sharp frown, one that the other woman deigned to ignore.
The flippant remark seemed to have served its purpose, because while Hope’s eyes were still questioning, seeming to still want to press for more information, he remained silent. Vanille and Snow, however, had found Fang’s description of the situation hilarious, and both had begun to laugh hard enough to break a rib. Lightning narrowed her eyes, exhaling sharply as she continued to eat in cold silence.
Idiots.
Standing by the campfire, still holding onto a pair of battered-looking bowls, Sazh seemed to look at Fang and Lightning for a long moment. His eyes moved back and forth between them, taking in Fang’s smirk and Lightning’s cold sneer, as if trying to figure something out. That innocent glance quickly turned wary, and he backed away slowly, as if he was expecting to be set on by rabid lobos at any moment.
“Hey, whatever you say happened, happened. Not my business, you hear?” he told them, and he handed Vanille one of the bowls, before taking a seat next to Snow.
Lightning shot him a look out the corner of her eye. Couldn’t fool some, it seemed, but at least Sazh looked like he was going to keep his mouth shut about his suspicions. Thank Eden for that small godsend.
…
After nearly five days of aimless wandering on the Steppe’s grassy plains, it looked like her new ‘family’ had finally decided to get their arses into gear and move it along towards Oerba. About time, too. If they spent much longer in this place, she was certain Snow would go cie’th from sheer boredom. Every day they wasted, their brands would grow worse, and Fang had to admit she was itching to get the show on the road.
It was a long trek back home, though, made even tougher by her and Vanille’s outdated knowledge of Gran Pulse. Was Atomos still carving out the Mah'habara Subterra? Was Taejin’s Tower still whole? A thousand things could have changed about this world - it was all so familiar, but it was also different.
Fang snorted to herself as she stuffed her blankets hastily into her pack. Worst case scenario, the journey could take months, and that was time they just didn’t have. Fang paused, brushing her hair over her shoulder again, and glanced over to where Vanille was helping Sazh fold up one of the thin tents near the campfire.
Vanille sure didn’t seem worried - at least, not to the casual observer. But Fang had grown up with her, and known Vanille since the beginning. There were none alive that could say they had a better understanding of the sweet redhead, and to Fang, it was obvious that Vanille had a hell of a lot on her mind, and it was weighing her down.
She sighed a little. Etro, did Fang have to play therapist to every member of their merry little band? It wasn’t as if she had no issues of her own to think about - or to avoid thinking about. Fang didn’t enjoy lingering on her memories of the War of Transgression, and she was glad that the past few days had provided her with distractions.
Shaking her head in exasperation, Fang shot a look towards Lightning’s back. Fang let herself smile a little, as she watched Lightning order Snow and Hope about, acting like a bloody general, attempting to get them to locate the collection of the supplies that had been scattered about the camp.
Now, Lightning was something she much preferred to think on, instead of that War. Sure, Fang might not have been taking the soldier’s delicate feelings on the matter all that seriously, but their little chat had certainly yielded… pleasing results.
Fang lifted a hand, lightly touching her own lips. Who’d have thought that Lightning - who until that point, had deliberately presented as utterly asexual and uninterested in such lowly human activities - could actually be interesting? Not a bad kiss, either. For a first timer.
Fang’s eyes followed Lightning as she strode about the camp, observed the way her lightly curling hair fell over one shoulder, noted the dispassionate look in her eyes. For a woman who had been suffering a sexuality crisis just a night ago, Lightning seemed remarkably calm and collected.
Maybe that was why she’d wanted to kiss Lightning, both last night and that morning. For just a moment, the coldness in those blue eyes seemed to melt, the iron chain of control seemed to shatter. In their wake, there was only a little confusion, warmth, and a startling sweetness. It made Fang want to try it again and again, to savour the reaction and see if it changed.
Fang tore her gaze away, fully aware that she’d been staring. To cover it up, she gave the camp a quick look-over. From the looks of things, Vanille and Sazh had finished up whatever mess they’d been making with the tent, and Sazh was taking a breather to feed his chocobo.
Vanille, however, seemed to have noticed where Fang’s gaze had been lingering. Tilting her head and staring at where Lightning was now arguing loudly with Snow over something that was probably inconsequential, Fang could almost see the cogs in her sister’s head begin to turn.
Fang stiffened. Had she not promised to keep last night’s events quiet, Fang might have normally just shrugged her shoulders and washed her hands of the sorry mess. But she had promised Lightning, and Fang tended to take her promises very seriously.
At the rate things were going, it looked like it was time for an intervention. Fang smoothly rose to her feet, just as Vanille turned back to her. Those eyes were narrowing, Fang realized with a mental groan.
Don’t take a guess, don’t take a guess.
It was useless, of course. The gig was up. Vanille’s green eyes widened, and she had clapped a hand over her mouth as her eyes darted between where Lightning was standing, and where Fang was slowly advancing on her.
Oh, bloody hell, Vanille! Fang growled silently as she began to sprint for her sister. If you blurt this I swear I am going to tan your hide!
“Fang!” Vanille squeaked out, as Fang finally reached her. “When you said you fixed her, I didn’t think you meant-”
“Oh no no no. We’re going to have to quick chat, missy, before you say something you might regret,” Fang cut in quickly, shooting Sazh a glace before grabbing her sister by the wrist. It didn’t look as if he’d been listening at all, but it was better to be safe than sorry, right? Fang forcefully dragged Vanille away before she could say something unfortunate, and no matter how her sister squirmed, Fang only brought them to a halt once they were a good distance from the base camp.
Fang blew a wayward lock of hair out of her face as she fixed Vanille with one of her most serious stares. Etro, the girl was still openly staring at Lightning’s back! Not that there wasn’t a lot to stare about, especially with an arse like that, but it was the principle of it all!
“I gotta ask. Do you have some sort of latent psychic power you’re not telling me about?” Fang demanded in a low voice, drawing Vanille’s attention back to the present with a light flick between her eyes. “Because I got no idea how you keep doing this.”
It was true. Vanille had always had an uncanny ability to pick out who Fang had spent the previous night with, but this was really starting to creep her out. Sometimes, it was a real pain in the rear to be so close to your sister. Privacy? Who ever heard about privacy?
Vanille laced both fingers behind her back, tilting her head ever so slightly and looked at Fang through her fiery red bangs. It was a look that the huntress had dubbed - with both great affection and dread - ‘the kitten stare’.
“So just how dumb do you think I am, Fang?” Vanille asked sweetly, a smile tugging at the corner of her lips as she spun away from Fang.
Fang rested a hand on her hip, raising an eyebrow as she reached forwards to muss with Vanille’s hair.
“Can I answer that one honestly, or - oww! Quit it with the pointy elbows, y’hear?” Fang scowled at her sister, rubbing the new tender spot on her ribs, as Vanille stuck her tongue out at her. That was better, because it seemed like forever since they’d been like this.
There was always so much stress over the Focus, and Vanille always seemed a little preoccupied with whatever shadows played in her mind.
It reminded Fang of another time, of carefree laughter in the flowers that had surrounded the fal’Cie Anima. Fang shook her head, trying to clear her own mind of those same lingering shadows, the distorted shapes and half-formed ideas that she couldn’t recognize yet. They were linked with the old Focus, weren’t they? It reminded her of the blood and terror of the War of Transgression. She pushed those thoughts aside again.
Later, Fang promised herself. She’d deal with her past later.
“Only if you tell the truth!” Vanille was saying, reminding Fang of the reason she’d unceremoniously dragged her sister all the way over there.
“Truth is subjective, Vanille.” Fang waved an airy hand in Lightning’s general direction. “But I suppose I could throw the gossip-monger a little bone. Last night, I tracked Lightning down and sorted out a few things with her, before she turned cie’th and devoured us all.”
Vanille looked sceptical. Where had she learned to raise her eyebrow so disdainfully? Sazh was teaching her some odd things.
“And that’s all you did? That’s unlike you. I seem to remember you bedhopping a lot, back before.” Vanille strolled a few paces away, her arms crossed beneath her breasts. The sun was well and truly up, now, and even in the shade Vanille’s hair was gleaming a vibrant red.
And bedhopper? Ouch. Was it her fault that sex was fun, when compared to the shithole war around them?
Despite her annoyance, Fang kept her voice level and conversational as she met Vanille step for step. “Lightning’s a Cocoon viper, and she’s about as repressed as a damn fal’Cie’s priestess. What in Etro’s name were you expecting? Hot sex up against a wall somewhere?”
Vanille’s look turned speculative as they kept wandering away from the prying ears of others, and Fang moved quickly to head off Vanille’s obvious line of thought.
“Now, now, keep that mind out of the gutter. You’re meant to be the innocent one here. Whatever would the Matron of the orphanage think? She might scrub your tongue with that nasty bar of soap.” Fang grinned at Vanille’s sudden pout. Her sister hadn’t had that punishment nearly as often as Fang had, but it was enough to leave a lasting impression.
“Oh, c’mon, Fang! You’ve been making all these comments about Light ever since the Palamecia! The least you could do is talk to me when something does happen!”
“You’re fussing about this.” Fang didn’t even try to disguise her amusement as she reached out and squeezed Vanille’s shoulder reassuringly.
Vanille looked back towards the camp. To Fang, her entire body language screamed ‘apprehension’ - from the frown creasing her forehead, the way she was lightly biting her lip, the uneasy set to her shoulders.
“Fang, we don’t even know her very well,” Vanille told her, her green eyes reflecting her worry. And folks reckoned that Fang was the overprotective one. “Of course I’m fussing! It’s… not really the same as with all the others, is it? You actually like her.”
“Yeah. I suppose… I do, a little.”
Her sister had raised a good point, to be fair. They’d known Lightning for a staggering one and a half weeks, and the soldier hadn’t exactly been all warm and fuzzy with them. No, prying personal background out of Lightning could be like dealing with a particularly disagreeable clam, aside from that lapse in Palumpolum. Given Lightning’s reluctance to open up, there was something strange about Fang’s fondness of her.
But how had Lightning put it? They understood one another, didn’t they? Fang looked back over to where Lightning was marshalling the rest of the l’Cie, heard the sharpness of the woman’s voice as it carried on the wind.
Lightning was certainly different from the women Fang usually found herself attracted to. Farron was uptight, controlled, and she was a viper from Cocoon, no less. Under normal circumstances, they’d be sworn enemies. But in spite of the world of differences between them, Fang had to admit it - at their core, their motivations were identical. It felt like she already knew how Lightning ticked, no matter how reticent the other woman could be.
Funny, how we managed to get under each other’s skin, without even realizing it.
But she couldn’t deny that there were threads of conflict between Vanille and Lightning - nothing huge, but she wasn’t that eager to foster ill-feeling in their strange little band. Given Lightning’s confessions the night before, Fang knew what was bothering Lightning. Misinterpretations of the extent of Fang’s relationship with her adoptive sister, not to mention more than a little jealousy. Vanille, on the other hand, was generally upbeat about her sister’s wandering eyes. She was overprotective, sure, but that was just what Oerbans tended to do with outsiders.
Outsiders, huh? Maybe that was the problem. Maybe Vanille hadn’t been so quick to adopt the other l’Cie as Fang had thought.
There was a dead-easy way to change the status quo, though. Vanille and Lightning spending a little quality time together would be easy enough to arrange, and would probably ease the friction she sensed between them. Vanille would get to know Fang’s latest interest, and Lightning would get to know Vanille, and quit acting like a jealous brat. Win-win situation!
Fang leaned forwards to ruffle Vanille’s hair again, smiling. “Right, so, then maybe we can work something out with Lightning, hey? Might help you guys get to know each other a little.”
Vanille smiled back at her, pushing Fang’s hand down and trying to smooth her bangs again. “Thanks, Fang. It’s not that I don’t like her, I just… don’t know her. You know?”
“I know. But jus’ promise me one thing. Now that you’ve stuck your cute little nose in this, could you please not torture her about it? I’ve worked too hard to get her this far without you going and making her skittish again.”
As she and Vanille began to walk back to the remains of the base camp, Fang smirked. Yeah, it seemed like a fine plan. A little good old fashioned friendship between Vanille and Lightning would do them a world of good.
…
“Wonder what they’re talking about?” Snow asked, scratching the back of his neck as he watched the distant figures of the two women.
Lightning followed the direction of his gaze, her eyes narrowing. Mindful not to disturb the Curaga spell Hope was performing on her, Lightning just exhaled sharply. She didn’t have to wonder what those two were discussing, not when they kept glancing covertly in her direction. Hadn’t Fang mentioned something about withholding the information from Vanille until later?
At some point that day, Lightning would have to talk to Fang, make her see why Lightning was dead serious about stopping all this. She shot a look at the three men standing around her, each in various stages of abject boredom. That talk would have to wait, though. Lightning tried not to feel too relieved at having to put it off.
“Women’s business, that’d be my guess,” Sazh told Snow, stroking the chick in his palm. In spite of the hopelessness of their situation on Gran Pulse, the older man was always one to pull it together and keep going. She supposed that was just Sazh’s fatherly instincts, though.
Hope smiled at Lightning as he finished up with his Curaga, straightening and rising to his feet. He’d been doing a lot better since the Alexander incident, not three days passed. He was more confident in himself, in his worth and his ability to keep up with the rest of the l’Cie. Hope wasn’t just a scared kid anymore, and from the squared set of his shoulders, he knew that now.
“You should be fine, Light. Just try to stay in one piece today,” Hope said, looking up suddenly, in the direction where Fang and Vanille had vanished. Lightning rested her hand on her hip as she followed his gaze, seeing the two women walking back. Finally, those two were ready to go. As they neared, she scowled at Fang, who had the nerve to look completely innocent.
Right. Some vow of silence. They really would have to talk about this later, Lightning promised silently as she led the group of l’Cie out onto the grassy plains of the Archylte Steppe. For now, they headed for Oerba, and prayed that someone - anyone - would be there.
…
Some beasties always stayed the same, Fang thought as they edged past the cliff where a King Behemoth was mauling a Megistotherian, the furious battle leaving deep scores in the soft, grassy earth and splattered blood over dirt and stone. Even when everything else about Gran Pulse had changed, you could always count on a King Behemoth to pick a fight with the prickliest of prey - such as the most cantankerous soldier in all of Gran Pulse and Cocoon, as last night’s escapades had proven.
Smiling a little, Fang shot a look over her shoulder, to where Hope and Vanille were crouched down, warily following her past the brawling monsters. Fang had to hand it to the soldier, though. Lightning sure knew a thing or two when it came to training recruits, especially ones as raw as Hope had been. From Vanille’s rather animated explanation of the events leading up to her capture in that quaint little fun park, the kid had been a bit…
Well, he’d been a sheltered little brat, to put a fine point on it. Fang supposed that she should cut him a little slack, or keep the backhanded compliments to a low key - seeing his ma die in front of his eyes like that would have been tough, but that was just the way things rolled in a war.
Fang watched Vanille and Hope cautiously make their way over to her, the smile vanishing from her lips. Unbidden, the War of Transgression loomed in her mind. Her memories of it were staggering in their violence, soaked in crimson from fire and blood and death. She remembered the fighting with such vividness, and then it all tapered off to nothing.
She felt a shadow of emotion stir inside her, an echo of anger, despair and regret. Fang looked at the back of her hand, watching the knuckles whiten as she tightened her grip on her lance. She supposed the memories would come soon enough.
Ragnarok. That name… That had been what Barthandelus had said, hadn’t it?
Out of the corner of her eye, and a good distance ahead of their position, she saw Snow pounding over the grass. Snow was a little red in the face from the run, but he didn’t seem all that alarmed. So Sunshine, Sazh and Snow hadn’t picked a fight they couldn’t handle, then. That was a relief.
Fang shouldered her lance, scanning the area Snow had come from, trying to place it. Etro, the place had changed so much! Fang couldn’t easily tell where she was, these days, and once she’d known it like the back of her hand. Once, she’d fought Cocoon here, in the ruins of a dying city.
But that was enough of that, though.
“Yo!” Snow panted, as he skidded to a halt in front of them. “We… we found something! It looks like one big-ass tunnel.”
Fang raised an eyebrow, automatically turning to meet her sister’s green eyes. Big-arse tunnel? She began to chuckle. After all these years, it looked as if Atomos still hadn’t decided to take a coffee break. What a relentless bastard! The familiarity was strangely reassuring, in this world of change and silence.
“A tunnel?” Vanille voiced Fang’s similar thoughts, clapping her hands and smiling brightly. “That’s got to be the Mah'habara Subterra!”
“Then you know it?” Snow pumped a fist, flashing the group a confident grin. “Say, do you guys happen to know where it leads?”
Fang shrugged, deliberately playing down her elation at the subterra still existing. Etro, it was a flaming tunnel.
“Could. If it’s what we two are thinking of, then there’s a good chance we can follow a path through the mountains, right up to Taejin’s Tower.”
“Like a shortcut?” Hope asked her softly, speaking to Fang directly for the first time that day. Maybe the kid was growing a spine, after all.
“I’d say it’d save a li’l bit of footwork, but I wouldn’t call it easier on the body,” Fang told them as she strode forwards, swinging her lance down. “Those beasties in there, they’ll be a whole ‘nother level. They’ll make gorgonopsids and amphisbaena look like exhibits at a pettin’ zoo.” She grinned, then. “You Cocoon folk won’t know what hit you.”
Vanille was just rolling her eyes at Fang’s over-dramatic warning. Way to spoil the effect. Still, Hope looked a little green at her words, so it wasn’t like it was a total loss.
“Well, uh, nothing to it but to do it, right?” Snow muttered, rubbing the back of his head with a little confusion. “C’mon, we really don’t want to keep them waiting.”
No need to wonder who Snow meant by ‘them’, Fang observed with a smirk as he dutifully led the way, back to where his party had discovered the entrance to the old Mah'habara Subterra. Maybe Lightning really was breaking him in, if she commanded him to jump and he was starting to ask ‘how high’…
As they rounded the bend, Lightning and Sazh came into view, waiting patiently by what looked to be a cavernous entrance. It looked like the subterra was a little different to how Fang remembered it - most of the gates and doors that had sealed the entrance off were gone now. Once again, she had to wonder what had happened here, why there had been such destruction wreaked on her home.
There had to be an answer to her questions. Somewhere. Her eyes lingered on Sazh, wondering.
Fang raised a hand in greeting as her group joined the other two. Lightning, leaning against the wall, her arms crossed against her chest, looked the picture of surliness. Fang rolled her eyes - the least the woman could do was acknowledge the greeting, or was that just too much effort?
Lightning’s eyes were distant as she gave the group a cool once-over, all iron-hard control. Fang bit her lip, admiring the other woman’s sharp profile. She almost wanted to lean forward and fluster the soldier a little more, dying to see if another kiss would thaw the woman out a little. In front of the rest of their group, how would Lightning react?
Despite her curiosity, Fang kept her hands to herself and her lips tightly compressed - she valued her life far too much to dare that.
“Are you ready?” Lightning asked, her voice flat and deadly serious.
“Are you?” Fang rested a hand on her hip in a blatant imitation of Lightning’s usual stance. While Fang had refrained from open affection, she still couldn’t resist needling Lightning for a reaction, to be rewarded with anything other than that damnable apathy. One of Lightning’s eyebrows twitched in annoyance - mission accomplished.
“I know I’m sick of these plains. Gimme a scene change already,” Snow complained loudly, and to his left, Vanille was nodding enthusiastically. Sazh was smiling, and Hope looked cautiously optimistic. Well, that settled that question.
As the group made its way down into the depths of the subterra, Fang glanced over at Vanille again. Her sister seemed positive again - maybe a little too positive, now that Fang carefully considered it.
One thing was for sure, though. She’d have to have a good talk with Vanille, about the past, about the Focus, and why the name Ragnarok created that echoes of emotions within her.
###
And there we have the next update. If I were the reader, I’d be a little anxious about the result of these two talks. ((innocent whistle))
Fang was worried about Vanille inadvertently spooking Lightning - but the woman is more than capable of talking herself out of her feelings and believing that she doesn’t have time for this. Who here thinks that Fang can make things work a second time around? Fang’s major character arc is beginning to rear its head, too.
Hm, as a guesstimate, I’ll probably have the next chapter done around mid-to-late February.
Fanfiction.net|LJ Vallis Media| Archylte Steppe|Mah'habara Subterra (current)| The Earthworks| Maw of the Abyss| Sulyya Springs|
Pairings and Characters: Lightning/Fang, Vanille, Hope, Sazh, Snow.
Rating: T (language, sexual references - overall M15+)
Word Count: 7,122
Spoiler Warning: Contains spoilers for all chapters of FFXIII.
Summary: The greater your anxiety, the closer to cie’th you become. Lightning is going to have to sort out her issues before they consume her. Old, bitter regrets, confusion, jealousy - the journey to Oerba is dangerous enough without being your own worst enemy. Part Three - It’s difficult to return to normalcy after what has happened between them, but Lightning isn’t giving in on this ‘normal’ business. The party presses onwards, and Fang wonders how to address the tension between Vanille and Lightning.
Fanfiction.net|LJ Vallis Media| Archylte Steppe|Mah'habara Subterra (current)| The Earthworks| Maw of the Abyss| Sulyya Springs|
A/N: …and it’s not by getting her Neapolitan on, not this time. ((laugh)) Decided to cut this right in the middle, as the length would be too much and you’d be looking at a whole ‘nother league of waiting for the next chapter. You can thank polkadot tiger for that one - thanks for the support, mate, it was truly appreciated. But seven thousand isn’t that bad, and I’m (slowly) working on the next.
###
Morning on Gran Pulse always dawned far too bright and early, heralded by the howls of the lobos and the screech of amphisbaena taking to the air. Lightning groaned as the morning sunlight fell across her eyes, flinging an arm over her face in an effort to stop her eyes from burning. Her body still hadn’t adjusted to the time differences between Cocoon and Gran Pulse.
Groggily, Lightning rolled over. The ground was more uncomfortable than normal, and she’d been having a good dream, Lightning remembered vaguely. She remembered that there had been Fang, and she had been-
With a muffled oath, Lightning sat bolt upright, her bleary eyes desperately taking in her surroundings. A cave with a narrow entrance, and there was the scattered remains of a campfire outside. Her companion, and the very reason she’d been so far from base camp, lay about half a pace away from her. Fang was snoring softly, and her silken, blue sari had been stripped off and used as a blanket. It revealed even more of Fang’s lean, tanned legs, and the uneasy soldier twitched at the sight.
She quickly glanced down at herself - her white jacket had been thrown off to one side, her gloves and pauldron had been removed and her cape had become a makeshift pillow.
Lightning pinched the bridge of her nose, squeezing her eyes shut. Slowly, almost reluctantly, memories began to drift back into her mind. She remembered that Fang had followed her out into the Steppe, had forced Lightning to confess to that damned lingering attraction last night. Lightning had decided to let Fang kiss her, just to see how it was, and then…
She pushed her bangs out of her eyes in frustration, her mind still struggling with fatigue. Had they gone further? Surely she’d be able to remember that. Her mind searched back, going through everything she recalled from the night before, going step by step. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary.
Eden, none of it seemed real, except for that dull ache in her shoulder. A quick cure spell fixed it up, and the joint was as good as new again. Muttering softly to herself, Lightning had to admit that this time, Fang had been correct. Lightning’s focus had been scattered and it had rendered her magic near useless. Still, she’d have to get Hope to take a proper look at it later. Speaking of which, they really had to start moving back to base camp.
Beside her, Fang mumbled something incomprehensible. Lightning froze as the other woman grabbed her wrist, trying to tug her back down to the rocky ground. How Fang was still managing to sleep on the uneven stone was a mystery, Lightning noted in exasperation. But even with last night’s kiss, she wasn’t sure why Fang had decided to be so familiar with her -
“Etro’s hands,” Fang finally growled, rolling over and looking up at Lightning with a groggy but accusatory frown. Her hair was mussed, sticking up in a mix of clumps and tangled braids. “I can practically hear you stressing out already. What’s wrong this time?”
Ignoring the implied taunt, Lightning grabbed her white jacket off the cave’s floor and brushed it down, before shouldering into it. Pulling on her pauldron and buckling it into place, Lightning rose to her feet swiftly. Since the day had begun, there was no use sitting around this cave. There was still Sazh and the kids - she included Snow in that category - to think about, no matter that she still felt like sleeping for another few hours.
“We need to get back to the others, before they think something’s amiss,” she told Fang curtly as she slipped on her gloves, jerking her head in an explicit order for Fang to start moving.
Fang just leaned back on her elbows, not bothering to stifle the wide yawn that bubbled past her lips. “Can’t you ever give the drill sergeant act a rest? I like you better when you’re not being a pain in the arse.”
Lightning met her sleepy gaze steadily, resting a hand on her hip.
Over the past week and a half that Lightning had known Fang, she had proven to be a notorious over-sleeper. The promise of a day hunting marks, a direct challenge, or implying that Vanille was in some form of danger, were really the only sure-fire things that would rouse Fang early in the morning. The latter was a low blow, but every minute they spent here was another minute lost to the Focus. Another minute that the others could piece together the reason behind Lightning’s mood swings.
Just because she’d admitted the truth to herself and Fang, did not mean she was willing to share it with Snow, Hope, Sazh and Vanille.
Especially not Vanille.
“So you don’t mind leaving Vanille in Snow’s tender care, then? Hasn’t Vanille told you about the Hanging Edge?” Lightning asked slowly, turning away from Fang, confident that the huntress’ own insecurities and perpetual worries about Vanille’s safety would do all the convincing for her.
Behind her, Fang laughed shortly and levered herself to her feet with the aid of her spear, grabbing her wrinkled, silken sari off the ground as she went. “You ain’t nearly so subtle as you think you’re being, Light, but… I can kinda see your point. Snow’s a great guy, he’d do his best, but he’s just not someone I’d be all that overjoyed about trusting Vanille’s safety to.”
Lightning made a sound that was both irritated and amused. With the slightly paranoid way Fang had been roping Vanille into every party expedition they’d formed thus far?
“I had no idea,” Lightning answered dryly, scooping up Fang’s neglected pack and holding it out for the other woman to take.
Fang scoffed at her sarcastic reply, grabbing the pack from Lightning’s outstretched hand and tossing it unceremoniously to the ground again. Fang placed her hands on her hips and rounded on her, as if Lightning had just done something greatly offensive.
Lightning watched Fang’s antics with a raised eyebrow, trying to ignore the slight heat rising in her cheeks as the huntress’ eyes roved up and down her body. She cursed under her breath. Did Fang have to be so open about it all?
Eden, if Serah could see this - if even Hope could see this…
“So you want to go, then? Right now?” Fang’s voice was low, her tone almost mocking. Lightning scowled at her.
Trust Fang to find an invitation when none was ever given.
“Obviously.” Lightning kept her voice steady as she bent to grab Fang’s backpack again, deliberately ignoring Fang’s slightly annoyed look.
“Trust you to be difficult about this whole thing,” Fang told Lightning, leaning in a little closer, so close now that Lightning could feel the warmth from Fang’s body. The soldier fought to stand her ground, even if every single fibre of her body screamed violation of personal space. “Not even one quick taste?”
Lightning blinked, then felt the cool, rough cave wall bump up against her back. She mentally cursed in realization. Standing her ground? Eden, this was going to have to stop. Still holding Fang’s pack, Lightning crossed her arms against her chest. She met the other woman’s green gaze levelly, even though her entire body was roaring at her to push Fang away and reject the way her heart was fluttering at the unwanted - welcome - closeness.
“Why would I want something?”
In spite of all her best efforts, Lightning’s voice came out a little bit hoarse. That was also something that was going to have to stop. She was not some skittish, raw recruit who’d never been out in the field. Fang was too close, but Lightning was fully trained, and she was in control. She’d been taught to maintain a grip of steel on her emotions, and aside from a few slips over the past week, that hadn’t changed.
Cold and serene, like the edge of a blade… No matter how she scrabbled after it, the mantra fled Lightning’s mind with Fang’s next words.
“A kiss,” Fang murmured against her ear, her breath tickling the side of Lightning’s neck as the soldier forced herself not to lean into the unusual sensation. “Don’t you lie to me, Light, ‘cause you made a great show of enjoyin’ it last night.”
Fang was right. Lightning had enjoyed the kiss last night, probably more than she should have, she realized with dismay. Especially if she wasn’t planning on letting this become a permanent arrangement between them.
But the memory of the softness of Fang’s lips stood out like a beacon in her mind, the gentleness of the kisses, the strange sense of released tension in her chest after it was all done. But Eden, it really had felt good…
Lightning swallowed unsteadily, feeling far too aware of the closeness of Fang’s warm body. It was a sensation that Lightning wasn’t used to, but she couldn’t say that she disliked it. She met Fang’s green eyes, and she nodded.
“That a yes?” Apparently, Fang liked things being as explicit as possible, Lightning noted with a frown.
“What do you think-” The rest was silenced by the dizzying feel of Fang’s lips on hers once again.
Fang’s calloused fingers were cupping her face gently, running rough her wild bangs again. This kiss was nowhere near as gentle as last night’s kiss had been, but no less captivating. It was deeper, faster, and there was something about it that made the breath in Lightning’s throat catch and her heart pound. It brought to mind something else entirely less innocent than a simple kiss, she realized. In spite of herself, Lightning closed her eyes, felt her body responding to the sensations. She thought she could smell jasmine-
The absence of Fang’s lips was enough to jolt Lightning from her reverie, the suddenness leaving her breathless. As she watched Fang reach down to retrieve the backpack that Lightning didn’t remember dropping during the kiss, Lightning touched her lips gently. She scowled - why were her hands quivering? She clenched the offending hand into a fist, a futile effort to stop it from shaking.
Absolutely unacceptable.
The more traitorous part of Lightning’s mind noted that kiss had been over before it had even begun. Lightning stifled the thoughts quickly - she was being ridiculous. How much longer was she expecting it to last? She’d said it herself. They had to get back to the others, or Snow and Vanille would enrage the wrong monsters and they’d arrive to find utter chaos.
Besides, if Lightning wasn’t going to let this become a permanent arrangement between them, she couldn’t complain when the kiss was too short. She shouldn’t even be comparing the two, really. Lightning crossed her arms over her chest, wishing her heart would stop fluttering. Eden, she shouldn’t have even let that last kiss happen, no matter how much she’d craved it.
No more. Lightning’s will firmed. This ends now.
Before she got a chance to inform Fang that this relationship was not happening between them, Fang was waving for Lightning to follow her out onto the Steppe. The two women squeezed through the cave entrance, and emerged, blinking furiously, into bright sunlight.
The morning was truly underway, Lightning realized with a sinking sensation in her stomach, as she allowed Fang take the lead. When they finally got back to camp, no doubt there would be questions. Why did Lightning leave like that, why were they out all night when they weren’t even that far from base camp? Eden, she wasn’t even sure if she could look either Snow or Hope in the face as she was right now-
“You know,” Fang mused, her voice light and conversational as they began the trek over the grassy plains, back towards the Vallis Media base camp. “I think I kinda like you like this.”
Lightning shot a sharp look at the huntress’ retreating back, wondering what game she was playing at. She shook herself to clear her mind, to focus. “Like what?”
“Off balance and all cute-like.” Fang made the answer sound like it were the most obvious thing in the world, and she shot the soldier a knowing smirk over her shoulder. “Makes for a nice change of pace. Wonder how long it’ll last?”
Cute-like? Lightning looked away, fixing her gaze to the rocky walls of the gorge as they approached. They passed through the first of the rocky corridor without incident, deftly avoiding the group of flans that attempted to block their path. Off-balance was nothing but another word for weakness, something that Lightning couldn’t afford these days.
Lightning sighed. She didn’t have time for this mess either, and it was time she set Fang straight. No more flirting, no more touching. No more kisses. Lightning tried to ignore the way her stomach sank a little, tried to silence that old voice that always wondered, what if…
“Fang-”
“It’s gonna have to wait, Sunshine,” Fang cut in, shooting a level look over her shoulder as she waved a hand in the direction of the camp. “You got that damn stubborn look about you again, but if you hadn’t kindly noticed, we’re already in view of the others.” Suddenly, Fang grinned. “You want Snow to see you all hot under the collar?”
Lightning tightened her jaw. Damn Fang, but she was right again. Lightning’s stomach clenched as she spotted Hope and Vanille sitting together by the fire, saw Snow doing warm-up stretches, saw Sazh busily preparing the party’s breakfast. If she started arguing with Fang now, then the others might catch wind of what had happened.
Even worse, what would Vanille say if she learned the truth? Fang had sworn that there was nothing between them, but the two were so interconnected that it was impossible to separate one from the other. How would Vanille react to a revelation that Lightning was… attracted to her adoptive sister?
It was yet another mark against starting anything permanent with Fang. There were far too many complications to consider.
Ahead of them, Lightning could see Snow raise an ungloved hand in a warm greeting. Fang followed the direction of Lightning’s anxious gaze, raising an eyebrow.
“Loved the eloquence there. You got a real way with words, Light.” At Lightning’s continued silence as they neared the camp, Fang heaved a long-suffering sigh, running a hand through her wavy, dark hair. “You’re a li’l worried about Vanille. She loves a good bit of gossip. Been that way ever since we were ankle-biters in Oerba. But. Since this seems to be such a big deal to you, I’ll respect that. You’ve got my vow of silence on the matter, even when it comes to Vanille. Well, as much as I can, in any case.”
Lightning sighed, and was careful to keep her voice low, so as not to carry on the brisk morning breeze. “That’s not reassuring, Fang.”
Fang just shrugged. “Weren’t meant to be, now shut up and act normal if you don’t wanna tip Vanille off. She’s like a bloodhound with this kind of thing.”
The crunch of grass underfoot stopped Lightning from voicing her sharp retort, and she watched with carefully controlled detachment as Snow jogged over. In spite of his alertness, he still seemed to be missing his usual bandana and combat gloves. It must have been a late rise for the party this morning, since Lightning hadn’t been around to marshal them into wakefulness.
“Oh, hey you two! Was wondering when you’d show up,” Snow said enthusiastically, as he took it upon himself to escort the wayward party members back to the campfire. He pumped a fist as he saw Sazh beginning to dish out the warmed leftovers - probably what had been last night’s meal - into a number of old, chipped bowls they’d uncovered in the Pulsian ruins. “You’re just in time for Sazh’s breakfast bonanza. You guys must be starving!”
Lightning rested a hand on her hip, listening to Snow chatter away. It was reassuring - not because of what he was saying, but because of how normal it felt.
Lightning nodded to herself, feeling the tension between her shoulder blades easing. Everything was just as normal, and that realization made it easier to maintain the cool and militant collectedness that she prized. Silently, she took one of the bowls, and made her way over to where Hope had taken a seat at the fire.
Having already given her a quick wave when she and Fang had first entered the camp - his mouth had been too full of food to greet her - Hope leaned back as she took a cautious spoonful of the ‘breakfast’, his green eyes watchful and filled with unasked questions. Questions that Lightning wasn’t sure how to answer, either. Couldn’t they all be as self-absorbed as Snow was?
“You two were gone a long time,” Hope said quietly, his eyebrows creasing in a worried frown. “What was wrong?”
The food seemed to lose all taste as Lightning forced herself not to freeze, but never before had a simple statement seemed so threatening.
As if sensing Lightning’s heightened tension, Fang had wandered over, and in one lazy motion, had flicked Hope in the back of the head. He jumped, rubbing the new sore spot with a scowl.
“Enough of the doubting, kiddo. At least I managed to fix her up before she self-destructed on us all,” Fang told him with a smirk, clearly amused by the crisis she’d averted.
Lightning appreciated that she’d moved to head off the more awkward questions, but did Fang have to go and say it like that? As if her brand had been ready to erupt and turn her cie’th last night? She shot Fang a sharp frown, one that the other woman deigned to ignore.
The flippant remark seemed to have served its purpose, because while Hope’s eyes were still questioning, seeming to still want to press for more information, he remained silent. Vanille and Snow, however, had found Fang’s description of the situation hilarious, and both had begun to laugh hard enough to break a rib. Lightning narrowed her eyes, exhaling sharply as she continued to eat in cold silence.
Idiots.
Standing by the campfire, still holding onto a pair of battered-looking bowls, Sazh seemed to look at Fang and Lightning for a long moment. His eyes moved back and forth between them, taking in Fang’s smirk and Lightning’s cold sneer, as if trying to figure something out. That innocent glance quickly turned wary, and he backed away slowly, as if he was expecting to be set on by rabid lobos at any moment.
“Hey, whatever you say happened, happened. Not my business, you hear?” he told them, and he handed Vanille one of the bowls, before taking a seat next to Snow.
Lightning shot him a look out the corner of her eye. Couldn’t fool some, it seemed, but at least Sazh looked like he was going to keep his mouth shut about his suspicions. Thank Eden for that small godsend.
…
After nearly five days of aimless wandering on the Steppe’s grassy plains, it looked like her new ‘family’ had finally decided to get their arses into gear and move it along towards Oerba. About time, too. If they spent much longer in this place, she was certain Snow would go cie’th from sheer boredom. Every day they wasted, their brands would grow worse, and Fang had to admit she was itching to get the show on the road.
It was a long trek back home, though, made even tougher by her and Vanille’s outdated knowledge of Gran Pulse. Was Atomos still carving out the Mah'habara Subterra? Was Taejin’s Tower still whole? A thousand things could have changed about this world - it was all so familiar, but it was also different.
Fang snorted to herself as she stuffed her blankets hastily into her pack. Worst case scenario, the journey could take months, and that was time they just didn’t have. Fang paused, brushing her hair over her shoulder again, and glanced over to where Vanille was helping Sazh fold up one of the thin tents near the campfire.
Vanille sure didn’t seem worried - at least, not to the casual observer. But Fang had grown up with her, and known Vanille since the beginning. There were none alive that could say they had a better understanding of the sweet redhead, and to Fang, it was obvious that Vanille had a hell of a lot on her mind, and it was weighing her down.
She sighed a little. Etro, did Fang have to play therapist to every member of their merry little band? It wasn’t as if she had no issues of her own to think about - or to avoid thinking about. Fang didn’t enjoy lingering on her memories of the War of Transgression, and she was glad that the past few days had provided her with distractions.
Shaking her head in exasperation, Fang shot a look towards Lightning’s back. Fang let herself smile a little, as she watched Lightning order Snow and Hope about, acting like a bloody general, attempting to get them to locate the collection of the supplies that had been scattered about the camp.
Now, Lightning was something she much preferred to think on, instead of that War. Sure, Fang might not have been taking the soldier’s delicate feelings on the matter all that seriously, but their little chat had certainly yielded… pleasing results.
Fang lifted a hand, lightly touching her own lips. Who’d have thought that Lightning - who until that point, had deliberately presented as utterly asexual and uninterested in such lowly human activities - could actually be interesting? Not a bad kiss, either. For a first timer.
Fang’s eyes followed Lightning as she strode about the camp, observed the way her lightly curling hair fell over one shoulder, noted the dispassionate look in her eyes. For a woman who had been suffering a sexuality crisis just a night ago, Lightning seemed remarkably calm and collected.
Maybe that was why she’d wanted to kiss Lightning, both last night and that morning. For just a moment, the coldness in those blue eyes seemed to melt, the iron chain of control seemed to shatter. In their wake, there was only a little confusion, warmth, and a startling sweetness. It made Fang want to try it again and again, to savour the reaction and see if it changed.
Fang tore her gaze away, fully aware that she’d been staring. To cover it up, she gave the camp a quick look-over. From the looks of things, Vanille and Sazh had finished up whatever mess they’d been making with the tent, and Sazh was taking a breather to feed his chocobo.
Vanille, however, seemed to have noticed where Fang’s gaze had been lingering. Tilting her head and staring at where Lightning was now arguing loudly with Snow over something that was probably inconsequential, Fang could almost see the cogs in her sister’s head begin to turn.
Fang stiffened. Had she not promised to keep last night’s events quiet, Fang might have normally just shrugged her shoulders and washed her hands of the sorry mess. But she had promised Lightning, and Fang tended to take her promises very seriously.
At the rate things were going, it looked like it was time for an intervention. Fang smoothly rose to her feet, just as Vanille turned back to her. Those eyes were narrowing, Fang realized with a mental groan.
Don’t take a guess, don’t take a guess.
It was useless, of course. The gig was up. Vanille’s green eyes widened, and she had clapped a hand over her mouth as her eyes darted between where Lightning was standing, and where Fang was slowly advancing on her.
Oh, bloody hell, Vanille! Fang growled silently as she began to sprint for her sister. If you blurt this I swear I am going to tan your hide!
“Fang!” Vanille squeaked out, as Fang finally reached her. “When you said you fixed her, I didn’t think you meant-”
“Oh no no no. We’re going to have to quick chat, missy, before you say something you might regret,” Fang cut in quickly, shooting Sazh a glace before grabbing her sister by the wrist. It didn’t look as if he’d been listening at all, but it was better to be safe than sorry, right? Fang forcefully dragged Vanille away before she could say something unfortunate, and no matter how her sister squirmed, Fang only brought them to a halt once they were a good distance from the base camp.
Fang blew a wayward lock of hair out of her face as she fixed Vanille with one of her most serious stares. Etro, the girl was still openly staring at Lightning’s back! Not that there wasn’t a lot to stare about, especially with an arse like that, but it was the principle of it all!
“I gotta ask. Do you have some sort of latent psychic power you’re not telling me about?” Fang demanded in a low voice, drawing Vanille’s attention back to the present with a light flick between her eyes. “Because I got no idea how you keep doing this.”
It was true. Vanille had always had an uncanny ability to pick out who Fang had spent the previous night with, but this was really starting to creep her out. Sometimes, it was a real pain in the rear to be so close to your sister. Privacy? Who ever heard about privacy?
Vanille laced both fingers behind her back, tilting her head ever so slightly and looked at Fang through her fiery red bangs. It was a look that the huntress had dubbed - with both great affection and dread - ‘the kitten stare’.
“So just how dumb do you think I am, Fang?” Vanille asked sweetly, a smile tugging at the corner of her lips as she spun away from Fang.
Fang rested a hand on her hip, raising an eyebrow as she reached forwards to muss with Vanille’s hair.
“Can I answer that one honestly, or - oww! Quit it with the pointy elbows, y’hear?” Fang scowled at her sister, rubbing the new tender spot on her ribs, as Vanille stuck her tongue out at her. That was better, because it seemed like forever since they’d been like this.
There was always so much stress over the Focus, and Vanille always seemed a little preoccupied with whatever shadows played in her mind.
It reminded Fang of another time, of carefree laughter in the flowers that had surrounded the fal’Cie Anima. Fang shook her head, trying to clear her own mind of those same lingering shadows, the distorted shapes and half-formed ideas that she couldn’t recognize yet. They were linked with the old Focus, weren’t they? It reminded her of the blood and terror of the War of Transgression. She pushed those thoughts aside again.
Later, Fang promised herself. She’d deal with her past later.
“Only if you tell the truth!” Vanille was saying, reminding Fang of the reason she’d unceremoniously dragged her sister all the way over there.
“Truth is subjective, Vanille.” Fang waved an airy hand in Lightning’s general direction. “But I suppose I could throw the gossip-monger a little bone. Last night, I tracked Lightning down and sorted out a few things with her, before she turned cie’th and devoured us all.”
Vanille looked sceptical. Where had she learned to raise her eyebrow so disdainfully? Sazh was teaching her some odd things.
“And that’s all you did? That’s unlike you. I seem to remember you bedhopping a lot, back before.” Vanille strolled a few paces away, her arms crossed beneath her breasts. The sun was well and truly up, now, and even in the shade Vanille’s hair was gleaming a vibrant red.
And bedhopper? Ouch. Was it her fault that sex was fun, when compared to the shithole war around them?
Despite her annoyance, Fang kept her voice level and conversational as she met Vanille step for step. “Lightning’s a Cocoon viper, and she’s about as repressed as a damn fal’Cie’s priestess. What in Etro’s name were you expecting? Hot sex up against a wall somewhere?”
Vanille’s look turned speculative as they kept wandering away from the prying ears of others, and Fang moved quickly to head off Vanille’s obvious line of thought.
“Now, now, keep that mind out of the gutter. You’re meant to be the innocent one here. Whatever would the Matron of the orphanage think? She might scrub your tongue with that nasty bar of soap.” Fang grinned at Vanille’s sudden pout. Her sister hadn’t had that punishment nearly as often as Fang had, but it was enough to leave a lasting impression.
“Oh, c’mon, Fang! You’ve been making all these comments about Light ever since the Palamecia! The least you could do is talk to me when something does happen!”
“You’re fussing about this.” Fang didn’t even try to disguise her amusement as she reached out and squeezed Vanille’s shoulder reassuringly.
Vanille looked back towards the camp. To Fang, her entire body language screamed ‘apprehension’ - from the frown creasing her forehead, the way she was lightly biting her lip, the uneasy set to her shoulders.
“Fang, we don’t even know her very well,” Vanille told her, her green eyes reflecting her worry. And folks reckoned that Fang was the overprotective one. “Of course I’m fussing! It’s… not really the same as with all the others, is it? You actually like her.”
“Yeah. I suppose… I do, a little.”
Her sister had raised a good point, to be fair. They’d known Lightning for a staggering one and a half weeks, and the soldier hadn’t exactly been all warm and fuzzy with them. No, prying personal background out of Lightning could be like dealing with a particularly disagreeable clam, aside from that lapse in Palumpolum. Given Lightning’s reluctance to open up, there was something strange about Fang’s fondness of her.
But how had Lightning put it? They understood one another, didn’t they? Fang looked back over to where Lightning was marshalling the rest of the l’Cie, heard the sharpness of the woman’s voice as it carried on the wind.
Lightning was certainly different from the women Fang usually found herself attracted to. Farron was uptight, controlled, and she was a viper from Cocoon, no less. Under normal circumstances, they’d be sworn enemies. But in spite of the world of differences between them, Fang had to admit it - at their core, their motivations were identical. It felt like she already knew how Lightning ticked, no matter how reticent the other woman could be.
Funny, how we managed to get under each other’s skin, without even realizing it.
But she couldn’t deny that there were threads of conflict between Vanille and Lightning - nothing huge, but she wasn’t that eager to foster ill-feeling in their strange little band. Given Lightning’s confessions the night before, Fang knew what was bothering Lightning. Misinterpretations of the extent of Fang’s relationship with her adoptive sister, not to mention more than a little jealousy. Vanille, on the other hand, was generally upbeat about her sister’s wandering eyes. She was overprotective, sure, but that was just what Oerbans tended to do with outsiders.
Outsiders, huh? Maybe that was the problem. Maybe Vanille hadn’t been so quick to adopt the other l’Cie as Fang had thought.
There was a dead-easy way to change the status quo, though. Vanille and Lightning spending a little quality time together would be easy enough to arrange, and would probably ease the friction she sensed between them. Vanille would get to know Fang’s latest interest, and Lightning would get to know Vanille, and quit acting like a jealous brat. Win-win situation!
Fang leaned forwards to ruffle Vanille’s hair again, smiling. “Right, so, then maybe we can work something out with Lightning, hey? Might help you guys get to know each other a little.”
Vanille smiled back at her, pushing Fang’s hand down and trying to smooth her bangs again. “Thanks, Fang. It’s not that I don’t like her, I just… don’t know her. You know?”
“I know. But jus’ promise me one thing. Now that you’ve stuck your cute little nose in this, could you please not torture her about it? I’ve worked too hard to get her this far without you going and making her skittish again.”
As she and Vanille began to walk back to the remains of the base camp, Fang smirked. Yeah, it seemed like a fine plan. A little good old fashioned friendship between Vanille and Lightning would do them a world of good.
…
“Wonder what they’re talking about?” Snow asked, scratching the back of his neck as he watched the distant figures of the two women.
Lightning followed the direction of his gaze, her eyes narrowing. Mindful not to disturb the Curaga spell Hope was performing on her, Lightning just exhaled sharply. She didn’t have to wonder what those two were discussing, not when they kept glancing covertly in her direction. Hadn’t Fang mentioned something about withholding the information from Vanille until later?
At some point that day, Lightning would have to talk to Fang, make her see why Lightning was dead serious about stopping all this. She shot a look at the three men standing around her, each in various stages of abject boredom. That talk would have to wait, though. Lightning tried not to feel too relieved at having to put it off.
“Women’s business, that’d be my guess,” Sazh told Snow, stroking the chick in his palm. In spite of the hopelessness of their situation on Gran Pulse, the older man was always one to pull it together and keep going. She supposed that was just Sazh’s fatherly instincts, though.
Hope smiled at Lightning as he finished up with his Curaga, straightening and rising to his feet. He’d been doing a lot better since the Alexander incident, not three days passed. He was more confident in himself, in his worth and his ability to keep up with the rest of the l’Cie. Hope wasn’t just a scared kid anymore, and from the squared set of his shoulders, he knew that now.
“You should be fine, Light. Just try to stay in one piece today,” Hope said, looking up suddenly, in the direction where Fang and Vanille had vanished. Lightning rested her hand on her hip as she followed his gaze, seeing the two women walking back. Finally, those two were ready to go. As they neared, she scowled at Fang, who had the nerve to look completely innocent.
Right. Some vow of silence. They really would have to talk about this later, Lightning promised silently as she led the group of l’Cie out onto the grassy plains of the Archylte Steppe. For now, they headed for Oerba, and prayed that someone - anyone - would be there.
…
Some beasties always stayed the same, Fang thought as they edged past the cliff where a King Behemoth was mauling a Megistotherian, the furious battle leaving deep scores in the soft, grassy earth and splattered blood over dirt and stone. Even when everything else about Gran Pulse had changed, you could always count on a King Behemoth to pick a fight with the prickliest of prey - such as the most cantankerous soldier in all of Gran Pulse and Cocoon, as last night’s escapades had proven.
Smiling a little, Fang shot a look over her shoulder, to where Hope and Vanille were crouched down, warily following her past the brawling monsters. Fang had to hand it to the soldier, though. Lightning sure knew a thing or two when it came to training recruits, especially ones as raw as Hope had been. From Vanille’s rather animated explanation of the events leading up to her capture in that quaint little fun park, the kid had been a bit…
Well, he’d been a sheltered little brat, to put a fine point on it. Fang supposed that she should cut him a little slack, or keep the backhanded compliments to a low key - seeing his ma die in front of his eyes like that would have been tough, but that was just the way things rolled in a war.
Fang watched Vanille and Hope cautiously make their way over to her, the smile vanishing from her lips. Unbidden, the War of Transgression loomed in her mind. Her memories of it were staggering in their violence, soaked in crimson from fire and blood and death. She remembered the fighting with such vividness, and then it all tapered off to nothing.
She felt a shadow of emotion stir inside her, an echo of anger, despair and regret. Fang looked at the back of her hand, watching the knuckles whiten as she tightened her grip on her lance. She supposed the memories would come soon enough.
Ragnarok. That name… That had been what Barthandelus had said, hadn’t it?
Out of the corner of her eye, and a good distance ahead of their position, she saw Snow pounding over the grass. Snow was a little red in the face from the run, but he didn’t seem all that alarmed. So Sunshine, Sazh and Snow hadn’t picked a fight they couldn’t handle, then. That was a relief.
Fang shouldered her lance, scanning the area Snow had come from, trying to place it. Etro, the place had changed so much! Fang couldn’t easily tell where she was, these days, and once she’d known it like the back of her hand. Once, she’d fought Cocoon here, in the ruins of a dying city.
But that was enough of that, though.
“Yo!” Snow panted, as he skidded to a halt in front of them. “We… we found something! It looks like one big-ass tunnel.”
Fang raised an eyebrow, automatically turning to meet her sister’s green eyes. Big-arse tunnel? She began to chuckle. After all these years, it looked as if Atomos still hadn’t decided to take a coffee break. What a relentless bastard! The familiarity was strangely reassuring, in this world of change and silence.
“A tunnel?” Vanille voiced Fang’s similar thoughts, clapping her hands and smiling brightly. “That’s got to be the Mah'habara Subterra!”
“Then you know it?” Snow pumped a fist, flashing the group a confident grin. “Say, do you guys happen to know where it leads?”
Fang shrugged, deliberately playing down her elation at the subterra still existing. Etro, it was a flaming tunnel.
“Could. If it’s what we two are thinking of, then there’s a good chance we can follow a path through the mountains, right up to Taejin’s Tower.”
“Like a shortcut?” Hope asked her softly, speaking to Fang directly for the first time that day. Maybe the kid was growing a spine, after all.
“I’d say it’d save a li’l bit of footwork, but I wouldn’t call it easier on the body,” Fang told them as she strode forwards, swinging her lance down. “Those beasties in there, they’ll be a whole ‘nother level. They’ll make gorgonopsids and amphisbaena look like exhibits at a pettin’ zoo.” She grinned, then. “You Cocoon folk won’t know what hit you.”
Vanille was just rolling her eyes at Fang’s over-dramatic warning. Way to spoil the effect. Still, Hope looked a little green at her words, so it wasn’t like it was a total loss.
“Well, uh, nothing to it but to do it, right?” Snow muttered, rubbing the back of his head with a little confusion. “C’mon, we really don’t want to keep them waiting.”
No need to wonder who Snow meant by ‘them’, Fang observed with a smirk as he dutifully led the way, back to where his party had discovered the entrance to the old Mah'habara Subterra. Maybe Lightning really was breaking him in, if she commanded him to jump and he was starting to ask ‘how high’…
As they rounded the bend, Lightning and Sazh came into view, waiting patiently by what looked to be a cavernous entrance. It looked like the subterra was a little different to how Fang remembered it - most of the gates and doors that had sealed the entrance off were gone now. Once again, she had to wonder what had happened here, why there had been such destruction wreaked on her home.
There had to be an answer to her questions. Somewhere. Her eyes lingered on Sazh, wondering.
Fang raised a hand in greeting as her group joined the other two. Lightning, leaning against the wall, her arms crossed against her chest, looked the picture of surliness. Fang rolled her eyes - the least the woman could do was acknowledge the greeting, or was that just too much effort?
Lightning’s eyes were distant as she gave the group a cool once-over, all iron-hard control. Fang bit her lip, admiring the other woman’s sharp profile. She almost wanted to lean forward and fluster the soldier a little more, dying to see if another kiss would thaw the woman out a little. In front of the rest of their group, how would Lightning react?
Despite her curiosity, Fang kept her hands to herself and her lips tightly compressed - she valued her life far too much to dare that.
“Are you ready?” Lightning asked, her voice flat and deadly serious.
“Are you?” Fang rested a hand on her hip in a blatant imitation of Lightning’s usual stance. While Fang had refrained from open affection, she still couldn’t resist needling Lightning for a reaction, to be rewarded with anything other than that damnable apathy. One of Lightning’s eyebrows twitched in annoyance - mission accomplished.
“I know I’m sick of these plains. Gimme a scene change already,” Snow complained loudly, and to his left, Vanille was nodding enthusiastically. Sazh was smiling, and Hope looked cautiously optimistic. Well, that settled that question.
As the group made its way down into the depths of the subterra, Fang glanced over at Vanille again. Her sister seemed positive again - maybe a little too positive, now that Fang carefully considered it.
One thing was for sure, though. She’d have to have a good talk with Vanille, about the past, about the Focus, and why the name Ragnarok created that echoes of emotions within her.
###
And there we have the next update. If I were the reader, I’d be a little anxious about the result of these two talks. ((innocent whistle))
Fang was worried about Vanille inadvertently spooking Lightning - but the woman is more than capable of talking herself out of her feelings and believing that she doesn’t have time for this. Who here thinks that Fang can make things work a second time around? Fang’s major character arc is beginning to rear its head, too.
Hm, as a guesstimate, I’ll probably have the next chapter done around mid-to-late February.
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