FF: Dating Manual (Voyager)
Ok, so this just popped into my head this morning, and I’m not sure there will be other parts written by me, so if anyone wants to pick up sections or subsections, like Identifying Possible Mates or Turbolift Etiquette for Dummies, feel free.
Dating Manual by Seven of Nine
Section 2, Subsection 4: Issuing the Invite
The former Borg drone stood in middle of the crowded messhall in her usual pose, ramrod-straight back and hands clasped, towering over the seated Chief Engineer even more than usual.
“Lieutenant B’Elanna Torres.” Even though it was a simple request for attention, her words, as usual, were said in a tone closer to issuing a command, a tone that always irritated the diminutive engineer.
“Yes?” she snapped, glancing up, and then up further, to meet Seven’s eyes, leaning back in her chair to keep from straining her neck at the uncomfortable position.
“I was wondering if you would like to meet me in your quarters at 1900 hours to ingest a nutritional supplement, followed by a chocolate food product with no apparent nutritional properties, before engaging in non-reproductive copulation activities?”
In sudden hush of the messhall, B’Elanna managed to sputter out a “What?”
A slight frown crossed Seven’s face, but she began to repeat her invitation before being stopped by B’Elanna. “I heard, Seven, I just, um, what are you doing?”
“I know it has been considerable time since you and Ensign Paris were dating, but I thought you would recognize an invitation to a date.”
None of the watching crewmembers, who were studiously pretending to focus on their own lunch, dared snicker at the comment about B’Elanna’s long dry spell, but she caught more than one crewmember grin before hiding their face behind a napkin.
“Um, I do, Seven, it’s just that, well, that’s a rather, um, detailed invitation.”
“Yes. The doctor informed me that enumerating the date’s activities in detail can be an enticement for the person to respond favorably to the invitation.”
B’Elanna cleared her throat, the sound seeming to echo in the quiet of the messhall. “There’s a difference between enticement and too much information, Seven.”
“Really?” The implant above her eye rose inquiringly. “Explain.”
B’Elanna tried to explain in as few words and specifics as possible, hoping that the ex-Borg would figure it out. “There’s just some things that usually aren’t spelled out in an invitation…”
“Was the description of the desert too detailed?”
“No.”
“Should I not have designated a time?”
“No, that was fine.”
“Then should I have forgone mention of copu-“
“That’s it.”
Seven’s frown deepened as she considered. “But I considered that to be the most suitable enticement to get you to agree to the date. I even considered suggesting we begin with copulation and forego the nutritional supplemental until we ‘worked up an appetite’.”
B’Elanna knew that she closely resembled a fish trying to breath air as her mouth worked and her brain tried desperately to catch up.
“1900 hours, my quarters,” she finally said, watching as Seven’s mouth quirked up in a small but pleased smile and everyone else in the messhall gaped. “Don’t be late.”
“I will comply.”
Dating Manual by Seven of Nine
Section 2, Subsection 4: Issuing the Invite
The former Borg drone stood in middle of the crowded messhall in her usual pose, ramrod-straight back and hands clasped, towering over the seated Chief Engineer even more than usual.
“Lieutenant B’Elanna Torres.” Even though it was a simple request for attention, her words, as usual, were said in a tone closer to issuing a command, a tone that always irritated the diminutive engineer.
“Yes?” she snapped, glancing up, and then up further, to meet Seven’s eyes, leaning back in her chair to keep from straining her neck at the uncomfortable position.
“I was wondering if you would like to meet me in your quarters at 1900 hours to ingest a nutritional supplement, followed by a chocolate food product with no apparent nutritional properties, before engaging in non-reproductive copulation activities?”
In sudden hush of the messhall, B’Elanna managed to sputter out a “What?”
A slight frown crossed Seven’s face, but she began to repeat her invitation before being stopped by B’Elanna. “I heard, Seven, I just, um, what are you doing?”
“I know it has been considerable time since you and Ensign Paris were dating, but I thought you would recognize an invitation to a date.”
None of the watching crewmembers, who were studiously pretending to focus on their own lunch, dared snicker at the comment about B’Elanna’s long dry spell, but she caught more than one crewmember grin before hiding their face behind a napkin.
“Um, I do, Seven, it’s just that, well, that’s a rather, um, detailed invitation.”
“Yes. The doctor informed me that enumerating the date’s activities in detail can be an enticement for the person to respond favorably to the invitation.”
B’Elanna cleared her throat, the sound seeming to echo in the quiet of the messhall. “There’s a difference between enticement and too much information, Seven.”
“Really?” The implant above her eye rose inquiringly. “Explain.”
B’Elanna tried to explain in as few words and specifics as possible, hoping that the ex-Borg would figure it out. “There’s just some things that usually aren’t spelled out in an invitation…”
“Was the description of the desert too detailed?”
“No.”
“Should I not have designated a time?”
“No, that was fine.”
“Then should I have forgone mention of copu-“
“That’s it.”
Seven’s frown deepened as she considered. “But I considered that to be the most suitable enticement to get you to agree to the date. I even considered suggesting we begin with copulation and forego the nutritional supplemental until we ‘worked up an appetite’.”
B’Elanna knew that she closely resembled a fish trying to breath air as her mouth worked and her brain tried desperately to catch up.
“1900 hours, my quarters,” she finally said, watching as Seven’s mouth quirked up in a small but pleased smile and everyone else in the messhall gaped. “Don’t be late.”
“I will comply.”