Ghosts Of The Abyss: Chapter 2
ZeldaQueen: Alright, is everyone ready? Me neither. Let's dive right in!
Projection Room Voices: Starting Media in 3...2...1...
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Chapter 2
(Author’s Note: Someone give me a cookie, because I’m updating! Whoo!
ZeldaQueen: Sure! Would you prefer a garbage-chip cookie, or one laced with arsenic?
A few notes about this story before the chapter begins: this is mainly my own story, with a few concepts taken from At World’s End, including Hoist the Colours - just because I love that song.
ZeldaQueen: *steeples her fingers* Gethesemane? Bull-fucking-shit. Those "few concepts" you took were pretty much the entire damned plot! Do you know what your "original" additions were? Making Calypso evil, shoving out Will and Elizabeth, and making everyone obsess over Kate! And you have the audacity to try to use the "it's my own story" to cover your ass? That implies that you had this story planned before At World's End came out, and that the movie's canon didn't influence your decision! If that's the case, well it's such an odd coincidence that you chose to bring in an entirely new character to be the villain who just happened to be Davy Jones' canon love interest! Calypso wasn't mentioned at all in Dead Man's Chest, so you just must be psychic to have chosen her as the evil bitch!
Also, for those of you who have read Origin, Book I in this saga, I’m going to rewrite it, because as of right now it’s not going anywhere.)
ZeldaQueen: The one chapter you rewrote didn't go anywhere either, nor did Heart of the Sea, Seven Days, Haunted, Salvation, Sins of the Father, or this pile of dogshit
Singapore - Kate’s Perspective
The King and his men stole the Queen from her bed
And bound her in her bones.
The sea be ours and by the powers,
Where we will,
We’ll roam.
Yo ho
All together,
Hoist the colors high.
Heave ho,
Thieves and beggars.
Never shall we die.
My song seemed to echo endlessly through the silence.
ZeldaQueen: ...I see that Gethesemane has wasted no time in shunting Elizabeth aside in favor of Kate. Go ahead bitch. Elizabeth wasn't kidnapped four times over the course of Dead Man's Chest. So she stole Elizabeth's lines and Gethesemane gave the song to her because she liked it. Take two drinks \~/ \~/
The waterways were deathly still as I silently rowed through the glassy surface; above me, soldiers marched to and fro, obviously on the lookout for pirates.
ZeldaQueen: In the confusion, several assassins slipped in, obviously on the lookout for Sues
I’d gotten word that a mass execution had taken place in Port Royal under Lord Cutler Beckett’s command - all rights had been suspended in terms of the prisoners’ rights to habeas corpus and even trial by jury.
ZeldaQueen: Oh yes, you're just so for fair treatment. That's why you totally ignored and mocked Will and Elizabeth, who were unfairly persecuted by Beckett and were sentenced for death. That's why you did nothing to protest Davy Jones basically giving sailors the choice to either serve him and turn into a monster or be killed instantly. That's why you will later treat Calypso as a far worse villain because she hurt you personally, than you do Beckett (mass executions? Hello?)
This angered me, and I silently clutched the oar in my hand until my knuckles were deathly white. Beckett wouldn’t emerge from this whole ordeal alive, of that I was certain.
ZeldaQueen: *yawns* Yeah, just like you wouldn't leave Davy Jones alive and how you would stab the heart yourself and all that fun stuff. Face it lady, you're a joke
I finally reached a small dock at the end of the canal. I disembarked, tying the small dinghy to the pier, and looked up to find two Singaporean pirates standing guard at the gate. I straightened, removing the large hat that had covered my face.
ZeldaQueen: That's either stealing from Barbossa or Elizabeth. Either way, take a drink \~/
“Dangerous song to be singing,” said one of the pirates. “Especially for the daughter of Blackbeard.”
ZeldaQueen: *headdesk* And yes, in case you're wondering, that is going to be brought up five million times to next week in this fic. And rest assured, the reason Gethesemane doesn't shut up about it is disgusting
“I believe that your master is expecting me,” I said, my voice slightly cold.
ZeldaQueen: Then put a jacket on it
“You think that just because you’re a woman, we wouldn’t suspect you of betrayal!” hissed one of the pirates, withdrawing his sword.
ZeldaQueen: The Sue was pleased, because she was a nymphomaniac and he had a nice, long sword, if you catch my drift
I smiled sweetly,
ZeldaQueen: JESUS CHRIST, I WAS JOKING!
and then withdrew two pistols, aiming it at their heads.
ZeldaQueen: Oh, aren't you feisty?
Gethesemane? Darling? Have you ever heard of the term "faux action girl"? It's when you bill a character as an action girl and have her do fuck-all by way of actual action. Your beloved avatar has passed there long ago. I don't think stunts like that make her look brave, I think she looks damned silly. Now Elizabeth is a full-on action girl, so I'd believe her capable of shooting someone... *happy place with canon*
“Now, Kate, let’s play nice.”
I glanced over my shoulder to find that my uncle, Captain Hector Barbossa, had emerged from the adjacent alleyway. He glanced at the two pirates.
ZeldaQueen: How is there an alleyway? Wasn't the entire town built on the water?
And yes, Kate also doesn't shut up about how Barbossa is her beloved uncle. I do hate her
“Sao Feng is expecting us, gentlemen.”
Reluctantly, the pirate lowered his sword and I lowered my pistol. Silently, they led us further into the alley and to another gated entrance, around which all manner of women and men were gathered.
ZeldaQueen: Before Kate could wonder why they were all carrying sporks, she was stabbed several times through the chest. "That was for trying to talk me down in the last story, you whore," muttered Elizabeth, wiping her sword clean
The women were undoubtedly prostitutes, while the men were guards and other pirates. One of our guides uttered the password, and we were allowed inside a steam-filled bath house; pirates sat idly in their baths, some encrusted with barnacles that, for a moment, made my heart stop; was Davy Jones here?
ZeldaQueen: I...really don't know the point of all of this detail.
Wait. She knows that Davy Jones has barnacles on him and she still fantasizes about the...thingy...in her you-know-what... *wibbles*
A pirate guard raised his hand.
ZeldaQueen: (Guard) "Stop! In the name of love! Before you break my heart!"
"Remove."
ZeldaQueen: (Guard) " - yourself from this fandom before we behead you"
I stared at him, and then sighed as I withdrew my cutlass, sword, and two pistols from their holsters and sheaths. I placed them on a nearby table and made to proceed, but once again, the guard stopped me. He looked me over.
ZeldaQueen: (Guard) "Now drop your pants and bend over"
(Sue) "Gladly!"
"Remove."
I cursed under my breath as I withdrew three more pistols from my breeches; my uncle looked at me with an odd expression, and I only smiled as I placed my weapons on the table.
ZeldaQueen: OH YES, BARBOSSA WOULD BE SO AMAZED THAT A PIRATE WOULD HAVE SO MANY PISTOLS HIDDEN ON HER PERSON! GETHESEMANE, YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW PIRATES LIVE, DO YOU?
The guard, however, still would not allow me to pass.
ZeldaQueen: Brave guy, trying to keep the Sue out
"Remove."
Here, he smiled. Had I not been outnumbered, I would have taken my pistol and shot him, though current circumstances did not allow the luxury.
ZeldaQueen: You know, southerngaelic pointed this out in the last fic, Kate only ever threatens people who are less powerful than her. First she expresses the desire to kill that little native kid, then she orders Elizabeth around, and now she's all "Tch, I totally would have shot him if I wasn't outnumbered, how annoying!" Where does this attitude go when she's within killing range of Davy Jones? Oh yeah, she has yet to bed him. My mistake!
Also, that was a copy of Elizabeth being unarmed. Take a drink \~/
A few moments later, I was clad in a short robe, one in which I felt highly exposed.
ZeldaQueen: AND YET YOU FELT PERFECTLY FINE WANDERING AROUND IN YOUR SLIP IN CHAPTER ONE OF HEART OF THE SEA! MAKE UP YOUR MIND, YOU WHORE!
Granted, I had worn much less in Jack's presence when we were alone together, but at least with Jack I felt comfortable.
ZeldaQueen: (Sue) "Did I mention that Jack and I have sex? Because we do! A lot! He only loves and has ever loved me, Gethesemane Kate! Ah ha ha!"
Here, I felt every single man's eyes on me; Uncle Hector gave each and every one a subtle, yet very clear, warning glare.
ZeldaQueen: *groans* And here we see Overprotective Uncle Hector crop up. Isn't that so much more interesting than canon Barbossa?
We made our way to the back of the bath house, to a tall, bald man; his back was turned.
ZeldaQueen: Please, dear lord, tell me it was Professor Xavier here to mind rape her!
"Sao Feng," said my uncle.
The pirate leader turned, revealing a long, thin mustache
ZeldaQueen: Which he promptly started twirling
and white, raised scars that streamed round his face. He smiled, a cruel, cold smile, upon seeing Uncle Hector and me.
"Well, well, well," he said as he came to stand before me. "The daughter of Blackbeard. What a nice surprise."
ZeldaQueen: Yep, who called it?
"We came here to ask for your help," I told him.
"Ah, yes. My help. You mean, my charts, I assume."
ZeldaQueen: (Sao Feng) " You can't have them. I gave them to Will and Elizabeth, just because I don't like you"
He held in his raised hand a tightly-rolled scroll of what looked like bamboo.
"You're going to World's End," he said, eyeing me suspiciously. "Why?"
ZeldaQueen: Because the movie said so. Really
Uncle Hector stepped forward. "We're going to bring someone back."
"And who would that be?"
ZeldaQueen: Elvis
"My husband," I answered defiantly. "Captain Jack Sparrow."
Sao Feng stared at me. "Your husband?"
ZeldaQueen: YES, HER HUSBAND! FOR GOD'S SAKE, ARE WE REALLY GOING THERE AGAIN???
*blinks* Wow, three outbursts by Chapter Two. This does not bode well
The two black-clad women who stood at either side of him giggled, but I glared, silencing them.
ZeldaQueen: Bitch, you couldn't silence a barking dog. And stop implying that your relationship with Jack is so Deep and Pure. Because the Suethor was stupid, Jack propositioned Elizabeth. And let's not get into what you get up to in this fic!
"He's trapped in Davy Jones's Locker," I continued. "We need those charts, and a ship and crew, to bring him back."
"Jack Sparrow? The only reason why I would want to bring him back from the Locker is so that I can send him there myself!" the captain yelled.
ZeldaQueen: Huh. Sao Feng seems to have anger issues
He then grabbed a man by the neck and held a cutlass to the man's throat.
"If you don't leave now, I'll kill him!" he hissed.
ZeldaQueen: Hold on a second, hold it. How does this make sense? I'll admit I haven't seen At World's End in its entirety for some time, but I seem to recall that Sao Feng got all angry with Elizabeth and Barbossa because Will tried to steal the maps before they showed up. He was caught and Sao Feng was pissed that they had the gall to try to rob him and then try asking nicely and expect him to hand it all over.
That, I thought, was also why he thought the strange man was in cahoots with Elizabeth and Barbossa. They already caught Will sneaking around, so they figured that the strange man was yet another spy. Here, there is absolutely no mention at all of Will sneaking in or being caught, so there's no reason to assume that they had spies.
So yeah Gethesemane, it's totally your original story. Right
Uncle Hector shrugged. "Go ahead - he's not our man."
I paused; that man was not with us.
ZeldaQueen: A bit slow on the uptake, aren't you?
"If he's not with us and he's not with you," I said as I glanced at Sao Feng, "who is he with?"
ZeldaQueen: He's with canon. The brave man took a stand to kick out the Sue
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Onward to: Chapter 3
Back to: Chapter 1
Return to: Table of Contents
Projection Room Voices: Starting Media in 3...2...1...
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Chapter 2
(Author’s Note: Someone give me a cookie, because I’m updating! Whoo!
ZeldaQueen: Sure! Would you prefer a garbage-chip cookie, or one laced with arsenic?
A few notes about this story before the chapter begins: this is mainly my own story, with a few concepts taken from At World’s End, including Hoist the Colours - just because I love that song.
ZeldaQueen: *steeples her fingers* Gethesemane? Bull-fucking-shit. Those "few concepts" you took were pretty much the entire damned plot! Do you know what your "original" additions were? Making Calypso evil, shoving out Will and Elizabeth, and making everyone obsess over Kate! And you have the audacity to try to use the "it's my own story" to cover your ass? That implies that you had this story planned before At World's End came out, and that the movie's canon didn't influence your decision! If that's the case, well it's such an odd coincidence that you chose to bring in an entirely new character to be the villain who just happened to be Davy Jones' canon love interest! Calypso wasn't mentioned at all in Dead Man's Chest, so you just must be psychic to have chosen her as the evil bitch!
Also, for those of you who have read Origin, Book I in this saga, I’m going to rewrite it, because as of right now it’s not going anywhere.)
ZeldaQueen: The one chapter you rewrote didn't go anywhere either, nor did Heart of the Sea, Seven Days, Haunted, Salvation, Sins of the Father, or this pile of dogshit
Singapore - Kate’s Perspective
The King and his men stole the Queen from her bed
And bound her in her bones.
The sea be ours and by the powers,
Where we will,
We’ll roam.
Yo ho
All together,
Hoist the colors high.
Heave ho,
Thieves and beggars.
Never shall we die.
My song seemed to echo endlessly through the silence.
ZeldaQueen: ...I see that Gethesemane has wasted no time in shunting Elizabeth aside in favor of Kate. Go ahead bitch. Elizabeth wasn't kidnapped four times over the course of Dead Man's Chest. So she stole Elizabeth's lines and Gethesemane gave the song to her because she liked it. Take two drinks \~/ \~/
The waterways were deathly still as I silently rowed through the glassy surface; above me, soldiers marched to and fro, obviously on the lookout for pirates.
ZeldaQueen: In the confusion, several assassins slipped in, obviously on the lookout for Sues
I’d gotten word that a mass execution had taken place in Port Royal under Lord Cutler Beckett’s command - all rights had been suspended in terms of the prisoners’ rights to habeas corpus and even trial by jury.
ZeldaQueen: Oh yes, you're just so for fair treatment. That's why you totally ignored and mocked Will and Elizabeth, who were unfairly persecuted by Beckett and were sentenced for death. That's why you did nothing to protest Davy Jones basically giving sailors the choice to either serve him and turn into a monster or be killed instantly. That's why you will later treat Calypso as a far worse villain because she hurt you personally, than you do Beckett (mass executions? Hello?)
This angered me, and I silently clutched the oar in my hand until my knuckles were deathly white. Beckett wouldn’t emerge from this whole ordeal alive, of that I was certain.
ZeldaQueen: *yawns* Yeah, just like you wouldn't leave Davy Jones alive and how you would stab the heart yourself and all that fun stuff. Face it lady, you're a joke
I finally reached a small dock at the end of the canal. I disembarked, tying the small dinghy to the pier, and looked up to find two Singaporean pirates standing guard at the gate. I straightened, removing the large hat that had covered my face.
ZeldaQueen: That's either stealing from Barbossa or Elizabeth. Either way, take a drink \~/
“Dangerous song to be singing,” said one of the pirates. “Especially for the daughter of Blackbeard.”
ZeldaQueen: *headdesk* And yes, in case you're wondering, that is going to be brought up five million times to next week in this fic. And rest assured, the reason Gethesemane doesn't shut up about it is disgusting
“I believe that your master is expecting me,” I said, my voice slightly cold.
ZeldaQueen: Then put a jacket on it
“You think that just because you’re a woman, we wouldn’t suspect you of betrayal!” hissed one of the pirates, withdrawing his sword.
ZeldaQueen: The Sue was pleased, because she was a nymphomaniac and he had a nice, long sword, if you catch my drift
I smiled sweetly,
ZeldaQueen: JESUS CHRIST, I WAS JOKING!
and then withdrew two pistols, aiming it at their heads.
ZeldaQueen: Oh, aren't you feisty?
Gethesemane? Darling? Have you ever heard of the term "faux action girl"? It's when you bill a character as an action girl and have her do fuck-all by way of actual action. Your beloved avatar has passed there long ago. I don't think stunts like that make her look brave, I think she looks damned silly. Now Elizabeth is a full-on action girl, so I'd believe her capable of shooting someone... *happy place with canon*
“Now, Kate, let’s play nice.”
I glanced over my shoulder to find that my uncle, Captain Hector Barbossa, had emerged from the adjacent alleyway. He glanced at the two pirates.
ZeldaQueen: How is there an alleyway? Wasn't the entire town built on the water?
And yes, Kate also doesn't shut up about how Barbossa is her beloved uncle. I do hate her
“Sao Feng is expecting us, gentlemen.”
Reluctantly, the pirate lowered his sword and I lowered my pistol. Silently, they led us further into the alley and to another gated entrance, around which all manner of women and men were gathered.
ZeldaQueen: Before Kate could wonder why they were all carrying sporks, she was stabbed several times through the chest. "That was for trying to talk me down in the last story, you whore," muttered Elizabeth, wiping her sword clean
The women were undoubtedly prostitutes, while the men were guards and other pirates. One of our guides uttered the password, and we were allowed inside a steam-filled bath house; pirates sat idly in their baths, some encrusted with barnacles that, for a moment, made my heart stop; was Davy Jones here?
ZeldaQueen: I...really don't know the point of all of this detail.
Wait. She knows that Davy Jones has barnacles on him and she still fantasizes about the...thingy...in her you-know-what... *wibbles*
A pirate guard raised his hand.
ZeldaQueen: (Guard) "Stop! In the name of love! Before you break my heart!"
"Remove."
ZeldaQueen: (Guard) " - yourself from this fandom before we behead you"
I stared at him, and then sighed as I withdrew my cutlass, sword, and two pistols from their holsters and sheaths. I placed them on a nearby table and made to proceed, but once again, the guard stopped me. He looked me over.
ZeldaQueen: (Guard) "Now drop your pants and bend over"
(Sue) "Gladly!"
"Remove."
I cursed under my breath as I withdrew three more pistols from my breeches; my uncle looked at me with an odd expression, and I only smiled as I placed my weapons on the table.
ZeldaQueen: OH YES, BARBOSSA WOULD BE SO AMAZED THAT A PIRATE WOULD HAVE SO MANY PISTOLS HIDDEN ON HER PERSON! GETHESEMANE, YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW PIRATES LIVE, DO YOU?
The guard, however, still would not allow me to pass.
ZeldaQueen: Brave guy, trying to keep the Sue out
"Remove."
Here, he smiled. Had I not been outnumbered, I would have taken my pistol and shot him, though current circumstances did not allow the luxury.
ZeldaQueen: You know, southerngaelic pointed this out in the last fic, Kate only ever threatens people who are less powerful than her. First she expresses the desire to kill that little native kid, then she orders Elizabeth around, and now she's all "Tch, I totally would have shot him if I wasn't outnumbered, how annoying!" Where does this attitude go when she's within killing range of Davy Jones? Oh yeah, she has yet to bed him. My mistake!
Also, that was a copy of Elizabeth being unarmed. Take a drink \~/
A few moments later, I was clad in a short robe, one in which I felt highly exposed.
ZeldaQueen: AND YET YOU FELT PERFECTLY FINE WANDERING AROUND IN YOUR SLIP IN CHAPTER ONE OF HEART OF THE SEA! MAKE UP YOUR MIND, YOU WHORE!
Granted, I had worn much less in Jack's presence when we were alone together, but at least with Jack I felt comfortable.
ZeldaQueen: (Sue) "Did I mention that Jack and I have sex? Because we do! A lot! He only loves and has ever loved me, Gethesemane Kate! Ah ha ha!"
Here, I felt every single man's eyes on me; Uncle Hector gave each and every one a subtle, yet very clear, warning glare.
ZeldaQueen: *groans* And here we see Overprotective Uncle Hector crop up. Isn't that so much more interesting than canon Barbossa?
We made our way to the back of the bath house, to a tall, bald man; his back was turned.
ZeldaQueen: Please, dear lord, tell me it was Professor Xavier here to mind rape her!
"Sao Feng," said my uncle.
The pirate leader turned, revealing a long, thin mustache
ZeldaQueen: Which he promptly started twirling
and white, raised scars that streamed round his face. He smiled, a cruel, cold smile, upon seeing Uncle Hector and me.
"Well, well, well," he said as he came to stand before me. "The daughter of Blackbeard. What a nice surprise."
ZeldaQueen: Yep, who called it?
"We came here to ask for your help," I told him.
"Ah, yes. My help. You mean, my charts, I assume."
ZeldaQueen: (Sao Feng) " You can't have them. I gave them to Will and Elizabeth, just because I don't like you"
He held in his raised hand a tightly-rolled scroll of what looked like bamboo.
"You're going to World's End," he said, eyeing me suspiciously. "Why?"
ZeldaQueen: Because the movie said so. Really
Uncle Hector stepped forward. "We're going to bring someone back."
"And who would that be?"
ZeldaQueen: Elvis
"My husband," I answered defiantly. "Captain Jack Sparrow."
Sao Feng stared at me. "Your husband?"
ZeldaQueen: YES, HER HUSBAND! FOR GOD'S SAKE, ARE WE REALLY GOING THERE AGAIN???
*blinks* Wow, three outbursts by Chapter Two. This does not bode well
The two black-clad women who stood at either side of him giggled, but I glared, silencing them.
ZeldaQueen: Bitch, you couldn't silence a barking dog. And stop implying that your relationship with Jack is so Deep and Pure. Because the Suethor was stupid, Jack propositioned Elizabeth. And let's not get into what you get up to in this fic!
"He's trapped in Davy Jones's Locker," I continued. "We need those charts, and a ship and crew, to bring him back."
"Jack Sparrow? The only reason why I would want to bring him back from the Locker is so that I can send him there myself!" the captain yelled.
ZeldaQueen: Huh. Sao Feng seems to have anger issues
He then grabbed a man by the neck and held a cutlass to the man's throat.
"If you don't leave now, I'll kill him!" he hissed.
ZeldaQueen: Hold on a second, hold it. How does this make sense? I'll admit I haven't seen At World's End in its entirety for some time, but I seem to recall that Sao Feng got all angry with Elizabeth and Barbossa because Will tried to steal the maps before they showed up. He was caught and Sao Feng was pissed that they had the gall to try to rob him and then try asking nicely and expect him to hand it all over.
That, I thought, was also why he thought the strange man was in cahoots with Elizabeth and Barbossa. They already caught Will sneaking around, so they figured that the strange man was yet another spy. Here, there is absolutely no mention at all of Will sneaking in or being caught, so there's no reason to assume that they had spies.
So yeah Gethesemane, it's totally your original story. Right
Uncle Hector shrugged. "Go ahead - he's not our man."
I paused; that man was not with us.
ZeldaQueen: A bit slow on the uptake, aren't you?
"If he's not with us and he's not with you," I said as I glanced at Sao Feng, "who is he with?"
ZeldaQueen: He's with canon. The brave man took a stand to kick out the Sue
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Onward to: Chapter 3
Back to: Chapter 1
Return to: Table of Contents