~Fun with Snatcher - Are criminals just genetically drawn to abandoned factories
I've mentioned Peter and Bryce here a few times before. Anyone who's known me for a while probably has a vague idea of who they are, but I wouldn't blame you if you didn't. Anyway, Peter and Bryce are identical twins that Alix has known since kindergarten, and they tend to hang out with him a lot. They're not your average pair of twins either, so they've ended skewing my view of identical twin relationships pretty heavily over the years.
Anyway, there are many stories of the constant fights they'd get into that I may have related to some of you over the years. One particularly notable one is when Peter and Bryce were fighting and Peter stopped and went "I'll be right back", left the room, came back with a meat tenderizer, and started wailing on Bryce with it. Apparently meat tenderizers leave really huge bruises.
So we went out to dinner tonight with some guy named Andrew and chatted about such and such, I forget how we got on the topic, but we eventually got into the topic of crazy things we'd heard about or done. I heard some great stories about Chris (my older brother) that I hadn't heard before, but I'm not sure if I should tell them without asking him first, since they are fairly insane. But anyway, Peter and Bryce started talking about the terrible things they've done to each other, including some other new ones I hadn't heard before.
I think one time Peter went in to work really drunk, and Bryce was yelling at him to get to work and whatever, and they eventually were tussling a bit when Bryce was trying to get Peter not to start shouting in the middle of the place, and then Peter twisted Bryce's hand around and held against a nearby oven, which totally burned up his hand real bad. Although later when Peter sobered up he felt really bad about it. Another time Peter cut him with a knife when he was screwing around, and I think another time nailed Bryce right in that nerve in your elbow with something really long and thin. I think they basically had a saying that was like "fights with Peter always end one of two ways: Peter gets a cheap shot, or Peter uses a tool" and etc. Apparently even when they were four they were constantly fighting with each other. :B
They also came up with a game called Buttpunch at work, with some specific rules about when and where you could buttpunch people, or who was in or out of buttpunch, and apparently they got a good number of people into it, and it's just hilarious to me how quantified the whole thing was about punching unsuspecting people in the butt. Pete called his hands "pete seeking missiles" even though that didn't really make sense, and was all like YOU GOT TO PUNCH DOWN TO UP, TO REALLY HIT THE MUSCLE THERE OTHERWISE YOU'LL JUST SLIDE OFF and lolol
BUT ANYWAY, FUN TIMES. I think Peter and Bryce have permanently made it so I can't watch or read anything with identical twins who are telepathic and share a deep soul connection and would die if they were separated because they're the most important person in the entire world to each other etc etc without loling.
Ah yeah, mp3 of that doofy thing I did. I probably should see if I can do a better take, I was rushed since I didn't want Alix to catch me singing. :B
I was also considering maybe downloading an autotuner plugin and seeing if I could make my voice all vocoder-y (i love vocoders, as evidenced by my love for eiffel 65) but then I thought that might be cheating. :B Maybe I'll mess with it later.
Now we're heading into new territory! And what strange territory it is. :O Oh yeah, here's a video of Metal's introduction. IT'S GREAT.
Previous editions
YEAH LET'S DO THIS
Jean may be dying at this very moment, but I can't leave without making sure my vehicle is in peak condition. SAFETY FIRST.
Had it lying on the front lawn for a while on some blocks, but I just got it working again, let's take a ride.
So from this point on, does Gillian just point at things and wait for Metal to explain what they are?
CERAMICS! MATERIAL OF THE FUTURE!
Metal: look can we just go
Our clandestine tryst will be our secret forever, my love.
I GUESS i can go save jean, if i have to
I TAPED THE GAME, LET'S SIT DOWN AND HAVE A BEER
I can make some hot dogs, we can have some man time.
Metal quietly plotting murder.
It's a great place, really nice service there.
"Now departing for the abandoned factory"
THE abandoned factory?
I'm familiar with how Metal says this because I heard it several times. Why?
Because on my old computer, the game would lock up here and just keep showing this picture with this VRRRRRRRR noise and nothing would happen, no matter what I tried. I thought maybe my ROM was glitched, but it turns out that my old computer just kind of sucks. On the new computer it works okay, so on to new territory!
Gillian says something here along the lines of... let me check my notes. "first day on the job and now this, cornered a snatcher, i wonder if this guy really is a snatcher, guess i'll find out if my training paid off" or something like that. You get the idea.
I FORGOT SOMETHING
But I'm sure I forgot something. Maybe I left the oven on.
I'm scared weh weh
As Metal presses a glock into his ribs.
Nice place. Dr. Wily could set up here, he'd just have to slap a skull on there.
I could go inside, but that would leave the area dangerously unlooked at. IMPORTANT THINGS FIRST.
I'd imagine there'd be a ton of hobos squatting in here, but maybe the Snatcher shooed them away.
As evidenced by a ton of lightning strikes.
LEAVE NO STONE UNTURNED!
Hey, I caught the lightning! Hahaha. I AM THE LIGHTNING. |<
There's a motion detector here?
Oh I guess Metal has one, never mind.
Where the Snatcher can get us, alright.
I actually wasted some more time checking all the items my inventory and trying to do things with them, but I cut that. A scream cuts the air, right as I'm investigating my money!
Metal's all omg D: and warns me for the first time about Insectors, which we read about last time!
Gillian's all i didn't get told about this wtf
LET'S ROLL
FINE
IF YOU INSIST
It's never a good thing when a game tells you to save. ALWAYS LISTEN. as a result I entered the factory extremely nervous. Would it be split-second timing where a Snatcher would appear without any warning in the middle of my LOOKing and INVESTIGATing and then I'd have to quickly shoot before I went down? TERROR AWAITS.
I am literally expecting a terminator to pop out and block out the whole screen at any minute. You can imagine I was a bit twitchy through this whole sequence.
and suddenly A SNATCHER APPEARS AAAAA
But no, not really. TIME TO COMPULSIVELY CHECK EVERYTHING
YOU GOT
PIPE
BAM a snatcher falls through
Harsh, Metal.
I usually associate corroded with metal, but sure.
BAM a snatcher from the ceiling
I wonder if I'm just too paranoid
I told you we should have called first, he's probably already seated.
Stop crying, Gillian.
SUDDENLY A SNATCHER
darn it
can you hear the sound of your heart calling
calling for me
Ah, multiple save files. Makes me feel much better. You never know! Maybe if I'd entered the factory sooner Jean wouldn't have screamed, or something.
No Snatchers in here.
I guess.
My pepper grinder, no!
Metal sounds incredibly distraught here. It's Little John, Jean's navigator! He and Metal used to go to school together. ;_;
He looks like a little bomb.
Little John, DEAD!
Paranoid as I was at this point, I assumed that the drops might hide the sound of approaching Snatchers. But apparently not.
TAKE MEMORY CHIP
Darn it NO TAKE MEMORY CHIP
AAAA
TAKE MEMORY CHIP
I am not going to your brother's wedding, he doesn't even like me and I won't know anyone there.
Odds that Gibson is dead: 100%
TAKE MEMORY CHIP
I forget what Gillian said here, but basically a little hand came out and took the chip. I didn't catch that since I was taking notes in a little text file, but my notes only helpfully say "take memory chip" and it's like thanks self. Awesome.
It'd be nice if the emulator automatically paused when I switched to a different window or something, that'd make this a bit easier. :B
SNATCHERS ANYWHERE
AT ANY MOMENT
THAT DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING
THEY COULD BE ANYWHERE
The weird thing is, this SHOULD be comforting, but somehow it just makes me feel more nervous. Like Metal is wrong and there IS something moving, or Snatchers don't register, or something. I AM COMPLETELY CONVINCED THAT I WILL SUDDENLY BE JUMPED BY A SNATCHER HERE
I think Sierra games have made me unnecessarily paranoid of sudden, completely unexpected death.
Hmm, this is new.
FINE
WHY'D YOU EVEN GIVE ME THAT MENU
AND SUDDENLY A SNATCHER
A Snatcher could pop out from behind any of those pillars at any minute oh god oh god
So you say.
Wow, lot of options here I see.
Embroidered pillows, Precious Moments figurines, CD cases, plush toys, pieces of popcorn, stained glass ornaments of strangely intense looking orange cats, pieces of JFK's head...
What large pillar? That thing on the right? Dang, I thought that was a wall. Eh.
Fine, whatever, I don't have to wait for a terminator to stick his head out from behind that graffiti and pop me in the face.
DUN DUN DUN
Most people may go check the body immediately, but I suspect this would be a prime place for an ambush because that's what the game WANTS you to do, to lull you into a false sense of security.
Maybe I've played too many survival horror games.
No movement either, so I didn't cap that. I GUESS it's safe to look.
NOW WE'RE TALKIN.
Hahahahahaha Metal here makes the exact kind of distressed EYAAH sound that Otacon makes whenever something terrible happens. Hee. It's just kind of a horrified oooooh D: D: sound and haha.
MY GOD
For some reason this line made me crack up really hard. I just heard it in this casual, sort of quietly amazed, "wow, would you look at that" sort of tone of voice.
PERFECT TIME FOR A SNATCHER AMBUSH
They're around here somewhere, I know it. Just waiting for me to turn my back.
Alright, let's give Gibson O'Headless a check.
THIS IS REALLY INCONVENIENT FOR ME.
We were going to go to that wedding together!
Finders keepers.
hahahahaha I don't know maybe it's late but all this dialogue is making me laugh for some reason, I keep hearing it in these incredibly goofy voices
Arrrgh so many menus
Metal, don't snuggle the corpse.
Interesting way to phrase that first sentence there, Gillian.
LIKE... SOME KIND OF ROBOT OR SOMETHING. I'VE NEVER HEARD OF SUCH A THING.
Gillian, get that out of your pants.
I KNOW I'M GOING TO GET ATTACKED
I JUST KNOW IT
Well whatever, he doesn't seem to have anything else of interest.
The ceiling collapsed during band practice, it was terrible.
Really? But this is the last room. FRICK, THEY'VE SET UP BEHIND ME WHILE I WAS WALKING THROUGH.
frick frick frick frick frick that's practically code for imminent death
Alright, guess I'll head back to base.
A beautiful dance... if only to see it with my own eyes...
I think the phrase is snapped like a twig, really, but okay.
HI JEAN
AAAAGH I KNOW THEY'RE HERE SOMEWHERE
Well that was anticlimactic.
what really how do you know
So apparently I missed something? Hmmm.
THAT'S WHAT I'D LIKE TO KNOW, AHYUCK!
Let's ask my friend, the pipe.
Fsssst you say, fascinating.
Checking the motion detector and...
OH GOD
AAAAA
I GOT THIS I'M READY I'M READY
WHERE IS IT
GILLIAN YOU FOOL
IT'LL COME UP FROM BELOW THE SCREEN
HAVEN'T YOU EVER DONE THIS BEFORE
AAAAAA! AAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>:(
I actually did seriously fall for this. Darn it, Metal.
FINE I'M LEAVING
Man wtf, what am I looking for
YEAH
So the Snatchers stole Snow-9 from the military? O...kay.
Hmmmm. Maybe I missed something on Jean or something.
DARN IT
I wasn't aware that the preferred method for battling Snatchers was to have a catfight with them. Again, no wonder Neo Kobe has a Snatcher problem.
Metal analyzes the hair, and says... now where did i put that piece of paper note...
Basically, the hair came from a male blood type A european Snatcher with wavy hair. Hmm.
And the skin came from a blood type O negative female european Snatcher. For some reason, I really didn't expect there to be two of them. Huh.
Hey he did, come to think of it.
So investigating Jean AGAIN (I didn't know you'd have to investigate things multiple times for things to show up, oh fun), Metal says he had an ulcer. Probably from having to protect an entire city against snatchers all by himself. But anyway, also says he has something in his stomach that he can analyze to see what he was last eating.
"We can find out where Jean's been!" Gillian says, since that's obviously the important thing here.
"fud"
Metal analyzes the fud and says that the last thing Jean ate was buffalo meat.
Gillian echoed my sentiment at the time, which was wtf where did he get buffalo meat the zoo
And let's take his clothes and paint his face, he's dead, he doesn't care
Or that he wore women's lingerie, same thing.
TAKE KEY
I've noticed one of the things that really weirds me out about how this game works is that when you see something, you don't automatically pick it up, and you have no menu option like "get [blank]", you have to look/investigate it and see if he'll pick it up or something. Given that a rule beaten into my head since I was a young child playing old Sierra games was PICK UP EVERYTHING
EVERYTHING
PICK IT UP NOW
YOU MAY NEVER HAVE ANOTHER CHANCE
DO IT NOW
QUICKLY OR YOU'LL DIE
This makes me incredibly nervous. D: I WANT TO PICK THESE THINGS UP IMMEDIATELY WHAT IF I JUMP INTO A CINEMATIC AND MISS SOMETHING AAAAAGH and it really weirds me out that I can't just click a hand on the key or type GET KEY or basically make Gillian get anything I see. Hahahaha I wonder if anyone else gets weirded out by this or if I've just got post-Sierra stress disorder.
PICK IT UP
PICK IT UP NOW
AAAAAAA
Okay, I'll just have to make a note to check everything like five times in the future. That'll be fun.
Or a very strong rat.
THERE'S NO WAY I WON'T BE ATTACKED NOW.
IT'S GOT TO HAPPEN SOON, ESPECIALLY NOW THAT I'VE COMPLETELY SEARCHED HIS BODY
I KNOW YOU'RE GOING TO DO IT GAME
YES THANK YOU as i breathe a sigh of relief
more submenus yaaay
AM I STILL NOT DONE
JESUS
It seems to be telling us to do something... but I just can't think of what it could be.
Where in the future with Old!Snake he will store guns and ammo. I mean.
And then... a noise or something? I forget.
A DUDE!
and there was another person who ran by but I didn't get a cap of them
MOM?!
QUICK LETS FOLLOW THEM INTO THE DEAD END
THERE'S NO WAY THIS COULD BACKFIRE
I'm on to you.
Hmm.
And then Gillian sneezed, but I didn't catch that because it happened kind of quickly. :O
Anyway, after he sneezed, the background music got really soft all of a sudden. HMM.
FRICK
FRICK!
True to form, the sound was really muffled. However, wearing headphones, I was able to listen in pretty close, and I heard something you never really want to hear in a game like this.
A ticking sound.
Hmmmmmm.
Ha! Caught it that time!
Is Gillian allergic to Snatchers, what is this
Yeah, how about that
THEY'RE BEHIND ME NOW, I KNOW IT
FRICK I WAS RIGHT
TIME TO GET OUT OF HERE NOW
OH KOJIMA.
I knew Little John was going to explode or something.
How dare you insinuate differently!
What a darling little key.
EEEEYAH! THE DARPA CHIEF! i mean time bomb
lol
That bomb has messed with the wrong man.
WE'RE SERIOUS ABOUT THIS
SERIOUSLY
WHAT GOOD ARE YOU
RUN RUN RUN
Oh really they give me a warning? Wow, that makes me feel a lot more at ease now. I was expecting sudden pop outs without any kind of warning at all that you'd just have to react quickly to. This is much better! Not so nervous about this now.
I didn't really get a lot of caps of this because I was busy trying to shoot the little buggers (since firefly99 told me that how well you do at the shooting range at HQ determines how difficult these battles are, it may be a good thing that I was distracted my practice session because I was trying to take caps of it) but this actually wasn't that difficult. I've played games that have required a lot more split-second timing, but then again this isn't at the hardest difficulty I think.
The only problem I had was that I'd set up a pretty good rhythm, but when I went over to one Insector, I pressed the fire button but it didn't register (maybe I didn't press it hard enough?) so the insector got off a shot, which threw off my entire pattern. I ended up getting nailed a few times as a I tried to get back on track. Keyboard. >:(
But if this is what the battles in the game are like I'm not worried. Then again, this could just be an early one, maybe it'll get stupid hard later. I GUESS WE'LL FIND OUT.
I WOULDN'T HAVE GOTTEN HIT IF THE KEYBOARD REGISTERED ME HITTING IT GRRR
I'm sitting directly on the wound.
Don't touch me there it's dirty~
I'm going out for a smoke.
DON'T PATRONIZE ME GAME
I CAN DO THIS
PIPE, WHAT DO I DO
GET PIPE
GET PIPE
GET PIPE
DARN IT
Oh yeah the bomb, should probably get out of the way
hahaha this is awesome, I'll try and capture it for you.
METAL COME ON
METAL: I CAN'T MOVE!
GILLIAN: WHAT
METAL: I'M PARALYZED WITH FEAR! LEAVE WITHOUT ME!
GILLIAN: WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU YOU STUPID ROBOT
i am only paraphrasing this a little, i swear to god
HWAAAARGH
gee golly
Gillian mentions that his ears are ringing.
"Well that's what you get for leaving the volume up. :>" Metal responds. Hahahaha oh Kojima I love you.
Glad to see Metal got over his brief panic attack though.
WE GOT TO REPORT THIS TO HQ
And away we go! What will happen next? TUNE IN NEXT TIME!
Anyway, there are many stories of the constant fights they'd get into that I may have related to some of you over the years. One particularly notable one is when Peter and Bryce were fighting and Peter stopped and went "I'll be right back", left the room, came back with a meat tenderizer, and started wailing on Bryce with it. Apparently meat tenderizers leave really huge bruises.
So we went out to dinner tonight with some guy named Andrew and chatted about such and such, I forget how we got on the topic, but we eventually got into the topic of crazy things we'd heard about or done. I heard some great stories about Chris (my older brother) that I hadn't heard before, but I'm not sure if I should tell them without asking him first, since they are fairly insane. But anyway, Peter and Bryce started talking about the terrible things they've done to each other, including some other new ones I hadn't heard before.
I think one time Peter went in to work really drunk, and Bryce was yelling at him to get to work and whatever, and they eventually were tussling a bit when Bryce was trying to get Peter not to start shouting in the middle of the place, and then Peter twisted Bryce's hand around and held against a nearby oven, which totally burned up his hand real bad. Although later when Peter sobered up he felt really bad about it. Another time Peter cut him with a knife when he was screwing around, and I think another time nailed Bryce right in that nerve in your elbow with something really long and thin. I think they basically had a saying that was like "fights with Peter always end one of two ways: Peter gets a cheap shot, or Peter uses a tool" and etc. Apparently even when they were four they were constantly fighting with each other. :B
They also came up with a game called Buttpunch at work, with some specific rules about when and where you could buttpunch people, or who was in or out of buttpunch, and apparently they got a good number of people into it, and it's just hilarious to me how quantified the whole thing was about punching unsuspecting people in the butt. Pete called his hands "pete seeking missiles" even though that didn't really make sense, and was all like YOU GOT TO PUNCH DOWN TO UP, TO REALLY HIT THE MUSCLE THERE OTHERWISE YOU'LL JUST SLIDE OFF and lolol
BUT ANYWAY, FUN TIMES. I think Peter and Bryce have permanently made it so I can't watch or read anything with identical twins who are telepathic and share a deep soul connection and would die if they were separated because they're the most important person in the entire world to each other etc etc without loling.
Ah yeah, mp3 of that doofy thing I did. I probably should see if I can do a better take, I was rushed since I didn't want Alix to catch me singing. :B
I was also considering maybe downloading an autotuner plugin and seeing if I could make my voice all vocoder-y (i love vocoders, as evidenced by my love for eiffel 65) but then I thought that might be cheating. :B Maybe I'll mess with it later.
Now we're heading into new territory! And what strange territory it is. :O Oh yeah, here's a video of Metal's introduction. IT'S GREAT.
Previous editions
YEAH LET'S DO THIS
Jean may be dying at this very moment, but I can't leave without making sure my vehicle is in peak condition. SAFETY FIRST.
Had it lying on the front lawn for a while on some blocks, but I just got it working again, let's take a ride.
So from this point on, does Gillian just point at things and wait for Metal to explain what they are?
CERAMICS! MATERIAL OF THE FUTURE!
Metal: look can we just go
Our clandestine tryst will be our secret forever, my love.
I GUESS i can go save jean, if i have to
I TAPED THE GAME, LET'S SIT DOWN AND HAVE A BEER
I can make some hot dogs, we can have some man time.
Metal quietly plotting murder.
It's a great place, really nice service there.
"Now departing for the abandoned factory"
THE abandoned factory?
I'm familiar with how Metal says this because I heard it several times. Why?
Because on my old computer, the game would lock up here and just keep showing this picture with this VRRRRRRRR noise and nothing would happen, no matter what I tried. I thought maybe my ROM was glitched, but it turns out that my old computer just kind of sucks. On the new computer it works okay, so on to new territory!
Gillian says something here along the lines of... let me check my notes. "first day on the job and now this, cornered a snatcher, i wonder if this guy really is a snatcher, guess i'll find out if my training paid off" or something like that. You get the idea.
I FORGOT SOMETHING
But I'm sure I forgot something. Maybe I left the oven on.
I'm scared weh weh
As Metal presses a glock into his ribs.
Nice place. Dr. Wily could set up here, he'd just have to slap a skull on there.
I could go inside, but that would leave the area dangerously unlooked at. IMPORTANT THINGS FIRST.
I'd imagine there'd be a ton of hobos squatting in here, but maybe the Snatcher shooed them away.
As evidenced by a ton of lightning strikes.
LEAVE NO STONE UNTURNED!
Hey, I caught the lightning! Hahaha. I AM THE LIGHTNING. |<
There's a motion detector here?
Oh I guess Metal has one, never mind.
Where the Snatcher can get us, alright.
I actually wasted some more time checking all the items my inventory and trying to do things with them, but I cut that. A scream cuts the air, right as I'm investigating my money!
Metal's all omg D: and warns me for the first time about Insectors, which we read about last time!
Gillian's all i didn't get told about this wtf
LET'S ROLL
FINE
IF YOU INSIST
It's never a good thing when a game tells you to save. ALWAYS LISTEN. as a result I entered the factory extremely nervous. Would it be split-second timing where a Snatcher would appear without any warning in the middle of my LOOKing and INVESTIGATing and then I'd have to quickly shoot before I went down? TERROR AWAITS.
I am literally expecting a terminator to pop out and block out the whole screen at any minute. You can imagine I was a bit twitchy through this whole sequence.
and suddenly A SNATCHER APPEARS AAAAA
But no, not really. TIME TO COMPULSIVELY CHECK EVERYTHING
YOU GOT
PIPE
BAM a snatcher falls through
Harsh, Metal.
I usually associate corroded with metal, but sure.
BAM a snatcher from the ceiling
I wonder if I'm just too paranoid
I told you we should have called first, he's probably already seated.
Stop crying, Gillian.
SUDDENLY A SNATCHER
darn it
can you hear the sound of your heart calling
calling for me
Ah, multiple save files. Makes me feel much better. You never know! Maybe if I'd entered the factory sooner Jean wouldn't have screamed, or something.
No Snatchers in here.
I guess.
My pepper grinder, no!
Metal sounds incredibly distraught here. It's Little John, Jean's navigator! He and Metal used to go to school together. ;_;
He looks like a little bomb.
Little John, DEAD!
Paranoid as I was at this point, I assumed that the drops might hide the sound of approaching Snatchers. But apparently not.
TAKE MEMORY CHIP
Darn it NO TAKE MEMORY CHIP
AAAA
TAKE MEMORY CHIP
I am not going to your brother's wedding, he doesn't even like me and I won't know anyone there.
Odds that Gibson is dead: 100%
TAKE MEMORY CHIP
I forget what Gillian said here, but basically a little hand came out and took the chip. I didn't catch that since I was taking notes in a little text file, but my notes only helpfully say "take memory chip" and it's like thanks self. Awesome.
It'd be nice if the emulator automatically paused when I switched to a different window or something, that'd make this a bit easier. :B
SNATCHERS ANYWHERE
AT ANY MOMENT
THAT DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING
THEY COULD BE ANYWHERE
The weird thing is, this SHOULD be comforting, but somehow it just makes me feel more nervous. Like Metal is wrong and there IS something moving, or Snatchers don't register, or something. I AM COMPLETELY CONVINCED THAT I WILL SUDDENLY BE JUMPED BY A SNATCHER HERE
I think Sierra games have made me unnecessarily paranoid of sudden, completely unexpected death.
Hmm, this is new.
FINE
WHY'D YOU EVEN GIVE ME THAT MENU
AND SUDDENLY A SNATCHER
A Snatcher could pop out from behind any of those pillars at any minute oh god oh god
So you say.
Wow, lot of options here I see.
Embroidered pillows, Precious Moments figurines, CD cases, plush toys, pieces of popcorn, stained glass ornaments of strangely intense looking orange cats, pieces of JFK's head...
What large pillar? That thing on the right? Dang, I thought that was a wall. Eh.
Fine, whatever, I don't have to wait for a terminator to stick his head out from behind that graffiti and pop me in the face.
DUN DUN DUN
Most people may go check the body immediately, but I suspect this would be a prime place for an ambush because that's what the game WANTS you to do, to lull you into a false sense of security.
Maybe I've played too many survival horror games.
No movement either, so I didn't cap that. I GUESS it's safe to look.
NOW WE'RE TALKIN.
Hahahahahaha Metal here makes the exact kind of distressed EYAAH sound that Otacon makes whenever something terrible happens. Hee. It's just kind of a horrified oooooh D: D: sound and haha.
MY GOD
For some reason this line made me crack up really hard. I just heard it in this casual, sort of quietly amazed, "wow, would you look at that" sort of tone of voice.
PERFECT TIME FOR A SNATCHER AMBUSH
They're around here somewhere, I know it. Just waiting for me to turn my back.
Alright, let's give Gibson O'Headless a check.
THIS IS REALLY INCONVENIENT FOR ME.
We were going to go to that wedding together!
Finders keepers.
hahahahaha I don't know maybe it's late but all this dialogue is making me laugh for some reason, I keep hearing it in these incredibly goofy voices
Arrrgh so many menus
Metal, don't snuggle the corpse.
Interesting way to phrase that first sentence there, Gillian.
LIKE... SOME KIND OF ROBOT OR SOMETHING. I'VE NEVER HEARD OF SUCH A THING.
Gillian, get that out of your pants.
I KNOW I'M GOING TO GET ATTACKED
I JUST KNOW IT
Well whatever, he doesn't seem to have anything else of interest.
The ceiling collapsed during band practice, it was terrible.
Really? But this is the last room. FRICK, THEY'VE SET UP BEHIND ME WHILE I WAS WALKING THROUGH.
frick frick frick frick frick that's practically code for imminent death
Alright, guess I'll head back to base.
A beautiful dance... if only to see it with my own eyes...
I think the phrase is snapped like a twig, really, but okay.
HI JEAN
AAAAGH I KNOW THEY'RE HERE SOMEWHERE
Well that was anticlimactic.
what really how do you know
So apparently I missed something? Hmmm.
THAT'S WHAT I'D LIKE TO KNOW, AHYUCK!
Let's ask my friend, the pipe.
Fsssst you say, fascinating.
Checking the motion detector and...
OH GOD
AAAAA
I GOT THIS I'M READY I'M READY
WHERE IS IT
GILLIAN YOU FOOL
IT'LL COME UP FROM BELOW THE SCREEN
HAVEN'T YOU EVER DONE THIS BEFORE
AAAAAA! AAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>:(
I actually did seriously fall for this. Darn it, Metal.
FINE I'M LEAVING
Man wtf, what am I looking for
YEAH
So the Snatchers stole Snow-9 from the military? O...kay.
Hmmmm. Maybe I missed something on Jean or something.
DARN IT
I wasn't aware that the preferred method for battling Snatchers was to have a catfight with them. Again, no wonder Neo Kobe has a Snatcher problem.
Metal analyzes the hair, and says... now where did i put that piece of paper note...
Basically, the hair came from a male blood type A european Snatcher with wavy hair. Hmm.
And the skin came from a blood type O negative female european Snatcher. For some reason, I really didn't expect there to be two of them. Huh.
Hey he did, come to think of it.
So investigating Jean AGAIN (I didn't know you'd have to investigate things multiple times for things to show up, oh fun), Metal says he had an ulcer. Probably from having to protect an entire city against snatchers all by himself. But anyway, also says he has something in his stomach that he can analyze to see what he was last eating.
"We can find out where Jean's been!" Gillian says, since that's obviously the important thing here.
"fud"
Metal analyzes the fud and says that the last thing Jean ate was buffalo meat.
Gillian echoed my sentiment at the time, which was wtf where did he get buffalo meat the zoo
And let's take his clothes and paint his face, he's dead, he doesn't care
Or that he wore women's lingerie, same thing.
TAKE KEY
I've noticed one of the things that really weirds me out about how this game works is that when you see something, you don't automatically pick it up, and you have no menu option like "get [blank]", you have to look/investigate it and see if he'll pick it up or something. Given that a rule beaten into my head since I was a young child playing old Sierra games was PICK UP EVERYTHING
EVERYTHING
PICK IT UP NOW
YOU MAY NEVER HAVE ANOTHER CHANCE
DO IT NOW
QUICKLY OR YOU'LL DIE
This makes me incredibly nervous. D: I WANT TO PICK THESE THINGS UP IMMEDIATELY WHAT IF I JUMP INTO A CINEMATIC AND MISS SOMETHING AAAAAGH and it really weirds me out that I can't just click a hand on the key or type GET KEY or basically make Gillian get anything I see. Hahahaha I wonder if anyone else gets weirded out by this or if I've just got post-Sierra stress disorder.
PICK IT UP
PICK IT UP NOW
AAAAAAA
Okay, I'll just have to make a note to check everything like five times in the future. That'll be fun.
Or a very strong rat.
THERE'S NO WAY I WON'T BE ATTACKED NOW.
IT'S GOT TO HAPPEN SOON, ESPECIALLY NOW THAT I'VE COMPLETELY SEARCHED HIS BODY
I KNOW YOU'RE GOING TO DO IT GAME
YES THANK YOU as i breathe a sigh of relief
more submenus yaaay
AM I STILL NOT DONE
JESUS
It seems to be telling us to do something... but I just can't think of what it could be.
Where in the future with Old!Snake he will store guns and ammo. I mean.
And then... a noise or something? I forget.
A DUDE!
and there was another person who ran by but I didn't get a cap of them
MOM?!
QUICK LETS FOLLOW THEM INTO THE DEAD END
THERE'S NO WAY THIS COULD BACKFIRE
I'm on to you.
Hmm.
And then Gillian sneezed, but I didn't catch that because it happened kind of quickly. :O
Anyway, after he sneezed, the background music got really soft all of a sudden. HMM.
FRICK
FRICK!
True to form, the sound was really muffled. However, wearing headphones, I was able to listen in pretty close, and I heard something you never really want to hear in a game like this.
A ticking sound.
Hmmmmmm.
Ha! Caught it that time!
Is Gillian allergic to Snatchers, what is this
Yeah, how about that
THEY'RE BEHIND ME NOW, I KNOW IT
FRICK I WAS RIGHT
TIME TO GET OUT OF HERE NOW
OH KOJIMA.
I knew Little John was going to explode or something.
How dare you insinuate differently!
What a darling little key.
EEEEYAH! THE DARPA CHIEF! i mean time bomb
lol
That bomb has messed with the wrong man.
WE'RE SERIOUS ABOUT THIS
SERIOUSLY
WHAT GOOD ARE YOU
RUN RUN RUN
Oh really they give me a warning? Wow, that makes me feel a lot more at ease now. I was expecting sudden pop outs without any kind of warning at all that you'd just have to react quickly to. This is much better! Not so nervous about this now.
I didn't really get a lot of caps of this because I was busy trying to shoot the little buggers (since firefly99 told me that how well you do at the shooting range at HQ determines how difficult these battles are, it may be a good thing that I was distracted my practice session because I was trying to take caps of it) but this actually wasn't that difficult. I've played games that have required a lot more split-second timing, but then again this isn't at the hardest difficulty I think.
The only problem I had was that I'd set up a pretty good rhythm, but when I went over to one Insector, I pressed the fire button but it didn't register (maybe I didn't press it hard enough?) so the insector got off a shot, which threw off my entire pattern. I ended up getting nailed a few times as a I tried to get back on track. Keyboard. >:(
But if this is what the battles in the game are like I'm not worried. Then again, this could just be an early one, maybe it'll get stupid hard later. I GUESS WE'LL FIND OUT.
I WOULDN'T HAVE GOTTEN HIT IF THE KEYBOARD REGISTERED ME HITTING IT GRRR
I'm sitting directly on the wound.
Don't touch me there it's dirty~
I'm going out for a smoke.
DON'T PATRONIZE ME GAME
I CAN DO THIS
PIPE, WHAT DO I DO
GET PIPE
GET PIPE
GET PIPE
DARN IT
Oh yeah the bomb, should probably get out of the way
hahaha this is awesome, I'll try and capture it for you.
METAL COME ON
METAL: I CAN'T MOVE!
GILLIAN: WHAT
METAL: I'M PARALYZED WITH FEAR! LEAVE WITHOUT ME!
GILLIAN: WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU YOU STUPID ROBOT
i am only paraphrasing this a little, i swear to god
HWAAAARGH
gee golly
Gillian mentions that his ears are ringing.
"Well that's what you get for leaving the volume up. :>" Metal responds. Hahahaha oh Kojima I love you.
Glad to see Metal got over his brief panic attack though.
WE GOT TO REPORT THIS TO HQ
And away we go! What will happen next? TUNE IN NEXT TIME!