Fifty cents for your soul - Prologue
Prologue
Jared spread his arms wide, like Jesus on the cross, and spun around and around, singing (badly) at the top of his voice.
He loved it out here. The grass was so very green, his view of the sky was unimpeded, and the trees which surrounded the clearing made him feel as if he were standing on a mountain in the middle of nowhere, instead of on a large private property in the middle of the Hollywood Hills. The property was owned by a Jesuit order and was both a seminary college and a monastic spiritual retreat.
Jared spun around one final time before falling dizzily to the ground. He lay dreamily on his back staring up at the sky, watching birds flying around and listening to the distant barking of dogs. The sky was just starting to turn a faint orange color as the sun began to set and Jared tucked his arms behind his head and watched the beauty of the changing colors with awe. In the distance a bell chimed and Jared’s face changed abruptly. He scrambled to his feet and took off at a flat run. He reached the fence that separated the monastery-proper from the rest of the property and scrambled over it, tearing his pants in the process. He launched himself rapidly through the cloisters and then came to a sudden stop when he realized that he’d just run past Brother Matthew, Brother John and Brother Paul, and consequently, all need for haste was over. His shoulders slumped, Jared turned hesitantly to face the Brothers, his eyes as big and wide as those of a puppy that knew it was in trouble.
“Brother Samuel,” said Paul, using Jared’s assigned spiritual name. “Perhaps you can explain where you have been. And why you are not in vespers.”
“Yes. Right,” Jared nodded vigorously and smiled, “you see…it was such a nice day and…well…I know I was supposed to be scrubbing floors but…the outdoors was calling to me and I just had to go and…” Jared could tell, from the looks on the faces of the senior brethren, that he was only digging himself a deeper hole with his explanation. “And I lost track of time,” he trailed off. “I’m sorry.”
The Brothers regarded him with disapproval and Jared sighed. Any minute now he was going to get another one of Brother Paul’s ‘in my day you would’ve been whipped for your behavior’ lectures. Jared could see him winding himself up for it.
“Brother Samuel,” said Brother John, reaching out and putting a hand on Jared’s arm. “Father Michael wants to see you.”
“Oh. Okay,” said Jared. “After vespers?”
“No Samuel. Now.”
-X-
“Why?” Jared said, his eyes pleading. “I don’t want to leave.”
Father Michael smiled. He walked around his desk and gestured for Jared to get up. He took him to stand in front of the full length mirror that he used when putting on his cassock for services.
“What do you see, Brother Samuel?” he asked.
Jared regarded his reflection and saw a 6ft4 kid with floppy hair, big hazel eyes, torn black pants and a dirty, rumpled, un-tucked shirt.
His shoulders slumped.
“Right. I’m the last person anyone would trust as their priest.”
Michael huffed.
“That wasn’t my point. You’re trustworthy to a fault. But you’re still a kid. You haven’t lived enough yet to know if this is the right vocation for you.”
Jared’s eyes were pleading again.
“It is Father, I know it is.”
Father Michael sighed.
“You are more exuberant, more full-of-life, than anyone I have ever met. I worry that this is not the right place for you.”
Jared met the priest’s eyes in the mirror and was surprised by the sadness he saw in them.
“Do you remember how I found you?” Jared laughed suddenly. “Brother Paul chased me off the property so many times when I was a kid, you must remember that?”
“You always seemed so very sad,” Father Michael recalled.
“Everyone always thinks that rich people don’t have any problems,” Jared said softly. “You’re not supposed to complain,” he shook his head. “Whenever it got… too bad, I’d climb the fence from our place onto this property. It was always so peaceful here. I didn’t have to worry about…” he sighed.
The priest put a hand to the younger man’s arm and guided him back to the visitor’s chair.
“That’s exactly my point,” he said. “I’m concerned that you’re just using us to hide. Jared, you need to go out and live.”
Jared looked up at the use of his real name.
“So you’re kicking me out?’
Father Michael shook his head.
“No. I’m sending you out on assignment. A friend of mine runs an outreach program in West Hollywood. I want you to work with him for a year. If you still feel the same way once you’ve finished your assignment, I’ll allow you to come back here and take your vows.”
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