SAY SOMETHING (I THINK I'M GIVING UP ON YOU) for YEOLIS [1/2]
For: yeolis
Title: Say something (i think i'm giving up on you)
Pairing(s): Chanyeol/Kai,[Spoiler]unrequited Baekhyun/Chanyeol, brief Baekhyun/Kai, Baekhyun/Kyungsoo, endgame Sehun/Kai, unrequited Chanyeol/Kai
Rating: PG-13
Length: 12.6k
Summary: Chanyeol can be oblivious to many things, even to the things that may lead to the end. Best Friends!AU
Author's note: //apologizes profusely
i took this prompt and blew it up to hell, no lie. this is just one big mess of everything so i apologize if this isn't exactly what you... expected. i hope you enjoy it though! it's pure angst tho so i hope you're okay with that...
also just want to thank my two friends for helping me with this fic! especially my kitten and bae <3
“How do I look?”
Jongin looks up from his phone to find Chanyeol staring at him, waiting for a response. He shrugs, not caring as he looks back to the screen of his phone. Chanyeol sighs, turning around to observe himself in the mirror again.
It was half past six in the morning, and Chanyeol called Jongin all the way to his house for opinions about his looks. It’s ridiculous because everyone wears the same uniform according to their respectful gender, but Chanyeol decides he wants to impress someone with his dashing looks. Jongin barely said a word to him regarding his new look. Chanyeol ditched the big specs he wore and went for contact lenses, and his usual mushroom cut was gelled to an updo. Jongin honestly thinks Chanyeol looks ridiculous, but he knows his friend doesn’t care.
Chanyeol has always been oblivious to many things. Whether it be to a conversation topic, to where they’re even headed while out, Chanyeol is a major grade A idiot when it comes to noticing someone else’s feelings. It hurts Jongin, honestly it does. Jongin’s been friends with Chanyeol since the start of middle school and the two have been inseparable.
Ever since the two entered high school, Chanyeol has been trying to notice some other guy’s attention. At first, Jongin was confused because it was a guy, but then he soon realized that he slowly started to fall for his best friend ever since the first time he felt jealousy rise up in his chest. It was when he introduced Chanyeol to his other friend.
His name is Baekhyun. Byun Baekhyun. He’s a year above than they are, making him a junior. The boy is nothing extravagant in Jongin’s own opinion. Call it being self-centered or being a prick, he really dislikes Baekhyun, even if they know each other well enough.
Before, Baekhyun was Jongin’s pretty average friend. If Chanyeol wasn’t around or was busy with other things, Jongin would hang out with Baekhyun. The two met in one of their shared classes between upper and lower classmen, and they were told to choose a partner for an assignment. Jongin didn’t know many of the students in the class, so Baekhyun decided to introduce himself.
Jongin thinks Baekhyun as an option rather than a friend. Chanyeol is definitely a friend to Jongin, but it seems like he’s pulling the line each morning before school starts.
Even when Jongin doesn’t answer Chanyeol’s questions about Baekhyun, he doesn’t stop. He never does, and it annoys him to no end.
“Jongin,” says Chanyeol. He glances at his friend, not even moving his head. “Do you think he won’t mind the sudden change? Is it too much?”
Baekhyun was never a fan of change. He always wanted to stick to old traditional ways.
“No,” He waves his hand, “It’s fine. He won’t mind.” Jongin doesn’t ignore the feeling of guilt in his chest.
“Perfect!” Chanyeol beams, throwing away all of the wasted products he used on himself. He walks over to his bed, grabbing his bag that laid on top. Jongin stayed put at his friend’s chair, continuing to browse on his phone.
Chanyeol yanks the device from Jongin’s grasp, looking at the screen. It wasn’t like Chanyeol didn’t notice Jongin’s speedy fingers tapping over the touchscreen. Jongin hears Chanyeol laugh, and his heart flutters. It actually almost makes him sick.
“Really?” Chanyeol shows the screen at Jongin. It shows a page of a popular manga. “You’re reading comics this early?” Jongin grabs his phone quickly, shutting it off. He stands from the chair and grabs his bag, swinging over his shoulder.
“Are you ready to go or not? It’s nearly seven.” His friend stares at him with a dumb look on his face, but then again, he always has a dumb look.
Unfortunately it’s the dumb look Jongin fell for.
“Sure!” Chanyeol smiles with nearly all his teeth showing. “Can we…” He starts, “Can we pass by Baekhyun’s house and ask if he wants to walk with us?”
No.
“Alright.”
Chanyeol loves Jongin, but Chanyeol also loves Baekhyun. Chanyeol loves both Jongin and Baekhyun, but love is used in different contexts. Love is a strange word because it can have so many meanings behind it, despite it only being four letters. Chanyeol loves Jongin because he’s a great friend. The two get along well with each other ever since the first day they saw each other. Even when Chanyeol has been talking nonstop about his Baekhyun, Jongin still hasn’t shown any signs of annoyance at all (he thinks; he hasn’t noticed anything different).
Chanyeol loves Baekhyun almost in the same context as Jongin. Baekhyun is great to be around with, much like his close friend. Ever since Jongin introduced the two, he couldn’t take his eyes off of him. At times, Chanyeol catches himself staring at the older boy. Chanyeol was the first to talk to Jongin about Baekhyun regarding dating, of all things.
The two never discussed topics regarding their feelings because it didn’t seem to fit their relationship early on. Their friendship is one where you hang out and about with, play video games with, talk about anything but your personal feelings. Chanyeol’s main focus is getting Baekhyun to ask him out, and he’s not very good at handling his own feelings. Because of that, he isn’t the best at noticing anyone else’s.
Chanyeol isn’t sure why, but things feel different with Jongin, especially when the two are alone. Despite being friends for five years, things aren’t the same as they were in their first year of high school. Jongin seems to have grown quiet with not only Chanyeol, but Baekhyun as well. Baekhyun’s been friends with Jongin since freshman year or last year of middle school, Chanyeol isn’t sure.
But that’s of the past. Chanyeol’s more focused on getting Baekhyun’s attention, and of course Kim Jongin, his best friend, will support him.
Right?
Yeah, he totally will.
That’s the kind of friend Jongin is. He’s supportive and backs Chanyeol up no matter what. But when he comes to think of it… What does he do for Jongin?
“Hey,” says a familiar voice. Chanyeol sees a hand waving in front of his eyes, “Are you awake or what?” He follows the hand as it falls back to the owner’s side. It was Baekhyun, his small puppy like face smiling at him. Chanyeol felt his heart rate increase dramatically. Baekhyun stood between him and Jongin, looking even smaller compared to the two other’s height.
Chanyeol fakes a laugh, “I don’t know. Am I?” He hears Baekhyun’s wonderful laugh, and Chanyeol smiles from ear to ear. He glances up from Baekhyun’s smiling face and looks at Jongin’s profile view. His friend is completely silent, one ear bud facing away from the two. He has his phone on hand, not taking his eyes off of it as he scrolls down whatever he’s on.
Chanyeol can’t help but feel that Jongin looks… angry, annoyed even. For a moment Chanyeol worries, but having Baekhyun tug at his arm to pay attention to the path distracts him.
He doesn’t notice the way Jongin looked at him when he laughed alongside with Baekhyun.
The three continued on towards school, separating into different homerooms according to their years. The teacher has yet to enter yet, and Chanyeol heads over to Jongin for a conversation. Jongin always sits in the back, while Chanyeol is usually in the middle of the classroom. He pulls over a seat from an empty desk and brings it over to his friend, nudging him with his elbow.
Jongin looks up at him and pulls out his ear bud, face stoic. “What?” Chanyeol ignored the slight annoyance in his voice. He put on a grin on his face and grabbed his phone.
“You,” He motioned towards Jongin, “need to stop going on your phone.” Chanyeol waves the device back and forth, emphasizing his point. Jongin rolls his eyes and snatches it out of his hand. “Seriously, you’ve been on it ever since you came to my house.”
Jongin shrugged, tugging his phone into his pants pocket. “Maybe you’re just getting a little boring, Yeol.” Chanyeol actually felt offended at his friend’s words, bring a hand to his heart to show his (mock?) hurt. “I’m kidding.” Jongin momentarily brought a finger to his chin, tapping it. He grinned, “Maybe.”
Chanyeol laughed, pushing his friend slightly on his shoulder. He didn’t put much force into it, but it still caused Jongin to nearly fall back. “Then I’ll just have to up my game!”
Jongin scoffed, “Sorry, Yeol. You’ve been getting old ever since Baekhyun’s been hanging out with us-” He stopped.
His friend looked at him, squinting since he can’t push up his frames on the bridge of his nose like before. The longer Chanyeol stared, the more Jongin grew nervous. It wasn’t until Chanyeol laughed heartily did Jongin break from his frozen spell.
“Have I?” A mighty pat on Jongin’s back, “You’re right! I’ve been using all the old jokes on him, just like how you and I used to be!” Jongin stiffens, hearing the past tense. When Chanyeol says it like that, it doesn’t sound that big of a deal. But in Jongin’s mind, it means nothing is the same as before. As usual, Chanyeol doesn’t seem to notice.
The bell rings, indicating the start of class. The students shuffle in and out of the classroom. Chanyeol stands up, fixing the chair to its rightful desk. He waves, smiling, “On the roof or outside?” Chanyeol refers to their lunch break. Baekhyun, Chanyeol, and Jongin along with other friends have been alternating on where to eat lunch.
Jongin stares at his friend.
“Roof.”
Turns out the gods above decided to make Jongin’s day worse by having him witness Baekhyun and Chanyeol basically flirting with each other. Everyone decided to eat in their classrooms, some students leaving and entering to be with their friends. Baekhyun and Sehun walked into the classroom, Chanyeol immediately greeting the two as they walk towards Jongin’s desk.
Sehun is a friend of Baekhyun, despite being a freshman. Jongin was introduced first to Sehun, and then to Chanyeol, following the rest of their other friends. Honestly, Jongin is grateful that Baekhyun brought Sehun along. At least he’ll have someone to talk to during their lunch break. Sort of.
Jongin pulls out his phone out of his pocket, only to have Chanyeol snatch it away from him for what seems like the third time of the day already.
“What is your problem with my phone?” Jongin snaps, standing up, but Chanyeol doesn’t sense the malice in his voice. He’s so fucking oblivious.
Chanyeol puts it into his back pocket, “My problem is,” He crosses his arms, looking at his friend. “You need to stop going on your phone and start talking! You’ve barely been talking at all..” Jongin falls to his seat, huffing like a little child. Chanyeol now senses that Jongin is upset and sits next to him, bringing his lunch towards him.
“What’s up, man?” asks Chanyeol, eyes concerned. Jongin almost wants to laugh. “You really don’t talk to me a lot now. Something bothering you?” Jongin doesn’t answer, but his stomach rumbles instead. Chanyeol grins. “Ahh, so my friend is hungry, isn’t he?” He pushes the lunch box towards Jongin. “It’s cool, you can have it. I’ll just snag some of Baekhyun and Sehun’s lunch.”
“Excuse you.” Sehun bites back.
“You’re excused!” Baekhyun and Chanyeol say in unison. Their laughter is the loudest in the class, but no one else pays attention to it.
Jongin opens the lunch box that Chanyeol packed. It’s fried chicken, one of Jongin’s favorite dishes. He looks up at his friend, seeing his big goofy grin as he laughs along with Baekhyun. Sehun keeps a complete stoic face, only eating his lunch as he rolls his eyes at the two. Jongin chuckles, though bitterly.
“You should take what I said this morning into consideration.”
Chanyeol glances at Jongin, wiping tears from his eyes.
“I’m sorry, what did you say, Jongin?”
Sehun’s eyes focus on Jongin.
“Nothing.”
Things have been going pretty smoothly for Chanyeol. Minus Jongin, he thinks he’s gotten closer with Baekhyun (strangely it affects Chanyeol when he thinks of minus Jongin). Maybe he’ll eventually ask him out on a date or something, considering how Baekhyun seems so at ease with him. Jongin, on the other hand… Chanyeol is so worried for Jongin.
Their friendship doesn’t appear to be the same anymore, especially after Baekhyun came into their lives. Well, more so his. Jongin’s grown quiet, when he used to be lively just as Chanyeol himself. The boy uses his phone more than usual, which may seem normal to some but it’s a concern that won’t escape Chanyeol. It’s a strange feeling in his chest when he sees his friend so quiet. He almost looks as if…
As if he’s alone.
That’s the last thing Chanyeol wants, for Jongin to be alone. Jongin doesn’t deserve to be alone at all. It pains Chanyeol’s heart to not hear his friend’s laugh, or see his smile, a genuine smile. Any true friend of Jongin would know the difference between a genuine smile and a bullshit one.
When Jongin puts on a fake smile, he doesn’t smile with his teeth. He only brings his pink, full lips into a curve. His eyes don’t crinkle up into cute little moon crescents. It’s followed by some terrible lie too, if prompted. Chanyeol finds every aspect about Jongin cute, adorable, and very attractive, but it’s all platonic.
Chanyeol loves seeing Jongin truly smile. It shows how beautiful he can be (totally normal to say about your male friend). His pearly white teeth show when he smiles, and he laughs sometimes as well. Chanyeol loves seeing Jongin laugh, his voice is wonderful. Just like every fiber of Jongin’s being. Plus, his personality is something you won’t find in anyone else other than him.
Jongin can be introverted, just like how he has been recently with Chanyeol. He doesn’t know why Jongin’s been so reclusive, and he hates himself for not knowing Jongin better. But sometimes there are things that even the closest of friends do not know of.
Jongin can also be very cute, Chanyeol thinks to himself when he sees his friend pouting occasionally. He’s also caring, sweet, and very supportive even in the sidelines. He’ll speak up if things bother him, or he’ll speak about his feelings. It’s not often, but sometimes he does.
Chanyeol’s just rambling on and on about Jongin, his best friend in the entire world that he completely shares platonic feelings with.
That’s how much Chanyeol cares about Jongin. There are so many things that he can say about his friend, and it won’t be taken in a wrong way.
But what really bothers Chanyeol is why Jongin doesn’t talk about his feelings at all. He doesn’t know why, but it feels like something’s wrong. Whether it be with him, friends, or Jongin himself, it’s an uncomfortable feeling and Chanyeol doesn’t like it one bit.
He tries to ignore this strange feeling in his gut as he walks out of the school gates with Jongin.
“Chanyeol, Jongin!” yells Baekhyun. The two turn around, watching their small friend run towards them. “I have to stay after school to makeup a test. Sorry I couldn’t hang out with you guys today.”
Chanyeol glances at Jongin’s stone cold face. He isn’t sure if his friend tensed or not, but he did put on one of his fake smiles. “It’s alright.” He shrugs, “Maybe tomorrow, yeah?” Baekhyun nods.
“I’ll text you both later.” He starts to run the other way, waving, “See you on Monday!” The two wave back at Baekhyun, turning their backs once he’s out of view. They start walking home, the scent of wet pavement strong in the air.
Chanyeol and Jongin walk in silence towards his home, Jongin now on his phone once again after Chanyeol gave it back once lunch was over. He could faintly hear the track playing from Jongin’s earbud. He always listened to music at a deafening volume.
Deciding he can’t take the silence anymore with his closest friend, Chanyeol says, “It’s a shame Baekhyun can’t hang out with us on the weekend anymore, isn’t it?” He adds a quick laugh, trying not to sound forced, but it only makes it sound exactly that.
Jongin didn’t even look at Chanyeol when he answers. “Yeah.”
One word. It’s always one word these days. Chanyeol sighs, now feeling dejected. Things don’t seem right anymore, and it confuses him. What happened to the old Jongin?
They continue walking in silence, not one of them making an effort to talk. Over the course of the day, Chanyeol’s eyes grew irritated due of his contacts. Because of that, his eyes grew red and began to tear. It was during one of his elective classes with both Jongin and Baekhyun. The latter stared at Chanyeol for quite some time at their group table while working on an assignment.
“Are you okay?” Baekhyun took a handkerchief from his school jacket’s pocket and leaned over. He dabbed at the edges of Chanyeol’s eyes. “You look like you’re crying…”
Chanyeol froze, unable to move. Baekhyun, the boy he most certainly has a crush on, is doing something that not many male friends would do with each other. He sat still, waiting for Baekhyun to pull back. Chanyeol’s eyes focused onto Baekhyun’s face, memorizing every feature on his smooth skin. His heart was beating so fast that it was almost deafening in his ears. It took his all to not lean in and capture the older boy’s lips.
He didn’t hear Jongin excuse himself to use the restroom.
“There,” Baekhyun finally said. He sat back in his seat and smiled, “I think you should wear your glasses instead, Chanyeol. You look a lot better with them.” The boy fiddled with the hairs of his own bangs, “And you should put your hair down too. The updo looks too… greasy.”
“Jongin told me you would like that! He said you’re totally okay with change, or something.”
Baekhyun froze only for a moment, but Chanyeol didn’t notice it. “Oh, um-”
They heard a chair scraping against the floor, causing them both to cringe. Jongin sat down, resuming his work. Chanyeol never noticed he left.
“Where were you?”
“Nowhere.”
And that was that.
Somehow, Chanyeol can’t help but feel that he is at fault for causing Jongin to act this way. For causing Jongin to act differently. But thankfully, some things haven’t changed, such as staying at each other’s house after school. Baekhyun comes too, but only on weekdays, due to practice for afterschool activities. Jongin walks in and heads upstairs towards Chanyeol’s bedroom. He follows after his friend, noticing that Jongin’s phone vibrates in his hand.
Once they closed the door of Chanyeol’s room, he finds Jongin already plopped on the bed, eyes glued to his phone and fingers swiftly moving across the screen. His ear buds are out too. Chanyeol thinks of grabbing the boy’s phone for the billionth time today, but he decides against it. He’s caused Jongin too much pain already, he thinks.
Chanyeol sets down his bag and heads towards his chair by his desk. He opens his laptop, immediately clicking the browser icon and selecting a playlist online to play though his speakers. It’s rap music; he and Jongin have always been big fans of rap.
Next, he grabs the small little container that are supposed to hold his contacts and places it on the desk. He has much difficulty getting them out, and he even hears Jongin laugh when he accidentally pokes himself in the eye. “Son of a bitch,” muttered Chanyeol when he closed the container now containing the lens. He’s going to stick with his glasses for a while longer.
Chanyeol opened an app on his laptop, turning on his computer’s built-in webcam. He checks himself out, running his fingers through his greasy, gelled hair. After staring at himself for a good minute or two, he decides that he does look better with glasses. The new hairstyle… not so much. He closes the tab of the playlist, deciding that a comfortable- if you can call it that - silence is better.
He swivels his chair around, stopping once he faces Jongin. “You know, you barely talk much now.”
Immediately Jongin’s reply came, “That’s because you talk too much.”
“And you’re always on your phone.”
“It’s not that different from before.”
“You’ve also been really rude to me, or anyone for that matter.”
“People change, Chanyeol. Get used to it.”
Chanyeol stands up and walks towards Jongin, shadow towering over Jongin’s sprawled figure on bed. Jongin looks up at him. “What is with you?” He shouts. "I’ve done nothing wrong towards you, yet you talk to me like we’re enemies!” He throws his hands up in the air, tolerance running thin.
Jongin sits up from bed and looks directly at Chanyeol, “Maybe we are!” He screamed with so much force, so much emotion, so much… anger. Chanyeol steps back from his friend’s tone. Never in his life did he ever hear Jongin shout at him like that.
“Maybe you’re just too fucking oblivious to even notice it! You’re not the only one who's had enough!” Jongin runs a hand through his hair.
He stands up abruptly, marching out of the room. Jongin slams the door open and announces, “I’m going to the bathroom.” And then the door is slammed shut. Chanyeol winces from the noise.
Was that my first fight with Jongin? It may have been brief, but there was so much anger in Jongin’s voice that it froze Chanyeol on the spot. The two have yelled at each other, but it was all for fun. They’re playful, and things aren’t really taken seriously between the two. Chanyeol has half a mind to go to Jongin, ask him if he’s alright or if anything is wrong (of course something’s wrong; that’s how you got in this mess in the first place).
Chanyeol noticed Jongin left his phone on the bed. It just vibrated, causing him to jump from the noise. There’s a green LED light coming from it, and he knows that’s a notification. The two nearly have the same model. He has no idea why he’s leaning towards the bed, and he’s almost unaware that his hand is reaching for his friend’s phone. It’s like his body did it on its own.
He turns it on, the notification of the text message showing up. It’s on Kakaotalk and it’s from Baekhyun.
From: Byun Baekhyun
Okay, I’ll do it. I don’t think it’s the brightest idea, though? Especially with how…
The entirety of the message is cut off because the preview box is too small. Chanyeol taps on the notification but is prompted to put in the password. Not that difficult, he thinks to himself, typing in Jongin’s birthday. Chanyeol’s used Jongin’s phone plenty of times, despite-
940114
Incorrect
Chanyeol stares at the phone in confusion. That’s always been the password for Jongin’s phone. He tries again, this time in a different order.
011494
Incorrect
Again.
140994
Incorrect
Again.
091494
Incorrect
149401
Incorrect
099414
Incorrect
The door creaks open, and Chanyeol quickly turns off the phone and throws it back onto the bed. He stands still like a soldier, arms to his side and back straight. Jongin walks through the door, and closes it quietly. Chanyeol can see a faint red or pink tinge on Jongin’s cheeks. He was either crying, or he’s shy to apologize. Chanyeol honestly can’t tell.
“S-Sorry,” says Jongin as he walks up to Chanyeol. There isn’t much of a height difference, but Chanyeol still is the tallest. “I didn’t mean to yell at you. There’s just some things going on.” He rubs the back of his neck, a habit Jongin often does when he’s embarrassed.
Chanyeol continues to listen, “I didn’t mean that we’re enemies. You’re my best friend, Chanyeol. I would never mean something like that, I swear.” His friend refuses to look at him in the eye. Chanyeol stares at him, now that Jongin has finished talking, he looks closely at Jongin’s face. His eyes seem red, so it does look like he may have shed a few tears. The blush on his face still has yet to go away, and the boy is pouting. He looks like a ten year old.
“You’re so cute,” Chanyeol says aloud. Jongin turns his head at Chanyeol, eyes wide. Chanyeol decided to embrace his friends, Jongin trapped in his arms. “Jongin, you’re so cute when you’re sorry, but you shouldn’t be sorry. Oh my god, it’s all my fault. I’m sorry that I made you upset forgive me.” He says out all at once. Jongin stiffened in Chanyeol’s hold, but quickly relaxed and pat his friend on the back, though carefully.
“I’m sorry too.” Another pat. “Now let go of me,” He hits Chanyeol hard on the back, a loud thump coming from it. Chanyeol cries out in pain. “I need to get my phone.” Jongin pushes his friend off and grabs his phone from the bed, stuffing it in his pocket.
“Jongin?” Chanyeol calls. His friend hums, “Um, actually, never mind. Let’s head downstairs.” Jongin’s already out the door by the time Chanyeol finishes his sentence. He decided that it would be best to not ask about Baekhyun, or what he was talking about with him. He knows that the two are close friends as well, and they all haven’t quite exactly told each other’s secrets to one another, but… He is curious as to why Jongin changed his password. More importantly…
What did Baekhyun agree to?
Chanyeol pushes the question to the back of his mind as he trudges downstairs, watching Jongin fiddle around the shelf containing the games and DVDs.
Even though they spend an enjoyable evening together, the question doesn’t leave Chanyeol’s mind.
Monday comes quicker than expected, and Chanyeol is greeted with Jongin and Baekhyun standing at his doorstep. It was fifteen minutes before seven, and he was heading over to Jongin’s house. He eyes the two strangely, seeing how they seem more radiant than usual, especially Jongin. His best friend is actually smiling after, what, weeks of being a brat?
He closes the door, fixing the bag on his shoulder. “What’s up with you two?” They walk down the porch together. Chanyeol takes his usual side by Baekhyun, who stands in between both him and Jongin. Chanyeol looks down at Baekhyun, and - scratch that, Baekhyun doesn’t look radiant than usual.
Something is bothering Baekhyun, and it’s clear to Chanyeol. He doesn’t know about Jongin, who’s talking animatedly to Baekhyun. The oldest of the three nods his head, smiling and laughing here and there. But there’s something amiss… Of course Chanyeol would notice after trying to get Baekhyun to recognize his own feelings.
It seems that whenever he laughs or smile, it’s forced. It’s something like with Jongin before their little ‘fight’ on Friday, but there’s a different feel to it. Chanyeol may not be the smartest of the three, but he can definitely read others. Definitely. He can tell that Baekhyun’s feeling nervous about something, because he darts his eyes over to Chanyeol for a quick glance and reverts his gaze. Chanyeol feels confused and a little bit left out.
Without thinking, he asks, “Baekhyun, why do you look… anxious?”
Baekhyun stiffens for a bit, and he can see that Jongin looks up at him quickly, before looking at Baekhyun. He laughs, sounding forced once again, and shakes his head. “It’s nothing, Yeol. It’s… just school. Just a test in one of my classes, that’s all.”
Chanyeol calls bullshit, but he doesn’t say. Instead, he says, “Oh. Well, will you be able to hang out after school, Jongin’s place?”
Baekhyun quickly denies, shaking his head. “I can’t,” A quick glance down at the ground, “I have to do something for the club today! Yeah, we have… practice, because we’re going to be performing somewhere this week-”
“And you haven’t told us?” He doesn’t mean to sound rude, but it’s just that Baekhyun’s never mentioned such a thing before.
Jongin lightly punches Chanyeol on his arm, earning an over exaggerated cry of pain from him. “Chanyeol,” He says like a parent warning their child, “Baek’s just been busy. Quit being an ass and walk.” He scoffs, crossing his arms, though he sees a smile forming on his friend’s lips.
Chanyeol feels a smile on his lips too, but he feels more confused than anything else.
Chanyeol walks into the practice room during lunch used by the Music Club.
“Hey, Kyungsoo.”
He’s a short little owl-eyed boy who is also in the Music Club, along with Baekhyun and his other friend, Jongdae. Kyungsoo is the youngest in the club, but he’s one of the most feared. It may be for his voice, sure, he’s got an amazing voice, but there’s also another reason. Though, it’s better left being unsaid.
Kyungsoo stands in front of Chanyeol, looking up at him. His heart-shaped lips break into a quick smile. “Hey, Chanyeol. What are you doing here?”
Chanyeol fidgets in his spot, “Um, I was curious about something, actually.” Kyungsoo stares at the older boy. Chanyeol continues on, “Does the club have practice today?”
“No, we don’t. Why’d you ask?”
So Baekhyun lied. That would explain why he looked so nervous this morning. Lying was never Baekhyun’s strong point.
“No reason,” he shrugs. “Are you guys also performing anywhere this week, or something?” No immediate answer came from Kyungsoo. Chanyeol waited, the two staring down each other, though there was something in his eyes. It looked familiar; it looked like Baekhyun’s eyes from this morning.
“Chanyeol,” He said slowly, “Who told you this?”
Immediately he blurted out, “Baekhyun.”
There it is. The familiar sense of nervousness in Kyungsoo’s eyes as well.
“No, we’re not performing anywhere at all this month.”
“Oh. Thanks.”
Chanyeol turns around, heading back towards his classroom instead, knowing the bell will ring soon for their next period. As he’s almost out of the door, he hears the sound of a phone unlocking in the quiet room. He continues walking, even after hearing Kyungsoo speak a familiar name.
“Baekhyun."
Something is a little off, Chanyeol senses as he walks alone to Jongin’s house. He texted his friend, wondering where he is, but no reply came. Chanyeol waited at the school gates for fifteen minutes before deciding to walk alone. It’s weird, he thinks, since Jongin never said anything to him. Jongin isn’t part of any after school activities, so something must have happened. That, or maybe Jongin is sleeping at home. Chanyeol doesn’t really know, but he’s looking forward to tonight.
Every time he goes to Jongin’s house, they watch movies and shows. A new anime came out today, and Chanyeol just knows that it’s a must watch on Jongin’s list. Chanyeol and Jongin have always shared the same interests, and Chanyeol wonders if he’s setting up his TV for it, waiting for him. That’s how it’s been in previous years; Jongin always waited for Chanyeol, even if he took his sweet time.
He must admit that he feels bad for making Jongin wait for him. He’s usually with Baekhyun when he walks to Jongin’s house, and the two get distracted by a stray animal or going to the corner store nearby. One time, when Chanyeol walked alone just like today, he found Jongin sleeping in his bed instead, laptop already hooked up to the television.
Jongin looked like a child on that day… He even mumbled some words in his sleep. Chanyeol’s not creepy for watching his best friend sleep, of course. Definitely not, even if he looked at how soft Jongin’s hair appeared, how his lips parted slightly with each breath, and how he resisted the temptation to draw on his friend’s face.
Definitely not creepy.
But something bothers Chanyeol. He’s nearly at Jongin’s home now, but Baekhyun keeps coming to his mind. First, it’s the message on Friday when he checked Jongin’s phone. He never did find out what did he agree to, and he’s not even sure if he wants to find out. Who is this ‘he’ that Baekhyun mentioned?
Another is what Kyungsoo said today. Kyungsoo is close with the three of them, but more with Baekhyun. His eyes looked like they grew larger when he said his friend’s name, but Chanyeol’s grew even wider when he heard Kyungsoo speak it after he left. Kyungsoo definitely called Baekhyun, but what the hell did they talk about?
The question still lingers in Chanyeol’s mind as he opens the door of Jongin’s home. One day, Jongin’s home is going to be robbed because he doesn’t lock the doors, Chanyeol laughs to himself. He removes his shoes at the door and puts them aside. The house is empty and almost deafeningly quiet.
He calls out, “Hey, Jongin! I’m going up!” The thuds of his feet on the stairs are the only noise in the house. Bag slung over his shoulder, he pauses and looks down at the living room. He notices that the place is still spotless. Looks like they’re going to watch in Jongin’s room tonight.
Chanyeol has an internal debate within himself as he stands in front of his friend’s room. The questions in his head are either ‘Ask Jongin why he didn’t wait for me’ or ‘Ask him if he knew about Baekhyun’. Chanyeol’s leaning more towards the first question, since there could be a possibility of Jongin not knowing… but then again, he could know something since the two are also close friends with each other.
“Ah, shit,” Chanyeol groaned as a headache slowly crept upon him. He should really stop thinking, it’s not like him to think too much. Instead, Chanyeol grabs the handle of the door and turns it, opening the door with much force.
“Surprise- Oh.” His sentence stops abruptly as he sees Jongin on the bed, shirtless with another body beneath him. From where he stood, Chanyeol couldn’t clearly see the other person’s face. Unconsciously, he felt his legs move towards the bed. The two seemed to be kissing sloppily, not caring that Chanyeol stood right besides them.
A soft groan came from the body beneath Jongin. Chanyeol heard Jongin chuckle against the boys lips.
Jongin pulled away from other’s face. It was a boy. It was Baekhyun. Chanyeol felt his soul leaving his body when he clearly saw his face.
Chanyeol’s grip on his bag tightened, and he has half a mind to swing it right onto Jongin’s smirking face. Baekhyun propped himself on his elbows, something along the lines of worry or concern on his face. Chanyeol didn’t notice.
Silence. Deafening silence washed over the room just like a tidal wave. It was suffocating, and Chanyeol couldn’t feel himself breathe.
“Hi, Chanyeol.” says Jongin, the first one to break the silence. Chanyeol can see the saliva from the two’s kiss sheen in the afternoon rays let by the window. He felt something twist in his gut.
He heard himself audibly gulp, and his throat started to hurt. It felt hot in the room, and his throat felt like it was burning. Chanyeol opened his mouth, trying to find his voice.
Eventually, he muttered, “Jongin…” It was barely loud as a whisper, and the words he wanted to say after dissipated into nothingness as he stared at his two friends in front of him.
Apparently Jongin seemed to know what he was going to say, and merely shrugged, the fucking smirk of his still on his face. “Don’t worry, it’s just an experiment.”
Chanyeol wanted to call bullshit, but instead, he said, “Experiment?” He breathed out shakily, “You call this an experiment? I don’t think this is a fucking experiment with the way that you sucked on each other’s faces.” He can hear his own voice rising steadily with each word, and god knows how long it’ll be until he punches Jongin straight on the jaw.
He laughs. Jongin fucking laughs, and never in his life has he felt this much anger from his laugh. “You know, maybe you’re right. Maybe this isn’t a fucking experiment,” Jongin turned to look at Baekhyun. Chanyeol couldn’t bear to look at him right now. “Right, Baekhyun? Tell Chanyeol that this isn’t an experiment. Tell him how long we’ve been doing this with each other behind his back.”
No response came from Baekhyun.
Jongin leaned down, gripping the boy's shoulders tightly that could leave a hand-shaped bruise for days. He whispered right into his ear, “Fucking tell him right now.” Jongin’s hot breath ghosting over the shell of his ear. Baekhyun shivered. He doesn’t know out of fear or because of Jongin himself.
Chanyeol closed his eyes, waiting for Baekhyun’s answer. He truly doesn’t know what to anticipate from the other, and he felt his entire body trembling out of fear. For the time that Chanyeol has known Baekhyun, he’s very innocent. Baekhyun may be mischievous and a joker, but he isn’t a liar. Well, he hopes so. Chanyeol’s only known him for a year and-
“No.” He shut his eyes even tighter, “No, this isn’t an experiment. We’re…” Baekhyun looked at Jongin, receiving a deadly glare from him. Chanyeol felt himself hold his breath. “We’ve been dating for the past month.”
It’s strange. Chanyeol thought hearing Baekhyun confirm such a thing would cause his world to crash down on him. He thought he would physically and emotionally feel his heart shattering into pieces all at once, but instead… Chanyeol feels nothing. The anger that slowly crept up in his voice when he spoke disappeared, like it wasn’t there in the first place. The feelings of betrayal felt like it didn’t even exist at this moment. Everything that Chanyeol idolized about Baekhyun was gone, like it vanished into thin air. Chanyeol felt absolutely nothing.
It’s almost like his world is now nothing.
Chanyeol exhaled the breath he was apparently holding, his grip on his bag loosening that it nearly fell off his shoulder. He breathed in the tension of the room, feeling Jongin’s angry eyes at him. He bowed his head, the frames of his glasses sliding down the bridge of his nose slightly.
“I’m sorry for interrupting you two.” Chanyeol murmurs, bowing down once again as he makes his way toward the door. He isn’t sure if he felt tears pricking the corners of his eyes or not, and his chest started to hurt. He felt nothing emotionally, but his body is reacting and it pains him physically.
The door creaked open and it was almost deafening in the silent room. Chanyeol shuts it closed, his pace increasing as he walked down the stairs, quickly throwing his shoes on and ran out of Jongin’s house. He never looked back as he walked a few houses down towards his own. There were no cars outside; his parents aren’t home yet. Chanyeol ran into his house and immediately went up the stairs into his room. He stood there at the closed door of his room, back hitting the door as he slid down. He ran a hand through his hair and removed his glasses. He felt the tears already escaping his eyes as he sat there on the cold wooden floor.
Jongin got off of Baekhyun, practically being shoved off the shorter male. He nearly landed on his bum until his legs were quick enough to catch himself from falling. Jongin had half a mind to yell at him, but froze when he saw Baekhyun tremble.
The boy was mumbling to himself that it was practically incoherent. His knees were up this his chest as he sat against the headboard of the bed, and his hands were gripping tightly on his hair. Jongin made a move to remove those delicate hands, but they were swatted away. Jongin swore under his breath as he felt the sting on the back of his hand.
“I can’t believe I did that,” His voice quivered, “I can’t believe I fucking did that. Why did I fucking agree with you? Jongin, why?” Baekhyun screamed, squeezing his eyes shut. He screamed so loud that Jongin flinched, feeling frightened for a moment.
But then, Jongin realized how fragile Baekhyun looked in front of him. He is the oldest of the three, but he looks like a child. He’s in fetal position, hands up to his ears shutting in the nonexistent noise in his head. Whimpers, cries, sobs - whatever - escaped his small lips. Tears nearly fell from his eyes, and he saw Baekhyun press his palms to his ears harder. Jongin doesn’t know if he should speak louder for Baekhyun to hear him.
“He needs to know how I’ve felt for the past years I’ve known him, Baekhyun.”
Baekhyun cracks an eye open, almost mechanically turning his head to face Jongin. His eyes were glistening, but no tears fell. Jongin swallowed the feeling of guilt down his throat.
“But why did I have to be brought into this? Why didn’t you just tell him?” It was barely a whisper did his fragile voice manage, but Jongin heard it clearly. He decided that Baekhyun deserves to - needs to - know the truth.
“I love him, Baekhyun. But Chanyeol loves you. He’s my best friend, the fucking idiot that I fell in love with, but he fell in love with you. You’re my best friend too, don’t get me wrong, but I’ve known him longer. He talks nonstop about you, asking for my opinions to impress you.” The pain in his chest felt like it was going to burst. Jongin breathed and continued.
“I have to deal with him talking about you every fucking day. Do you not know how I feel?” Jongin nearly yells, but manages to keep his voice down. He didn’t give Baekhyun enough time to answer. “No, no you don’t. Both of you are fucking oblivious, that’s why. Chanyeol doesn’t notice the way I stare at him, and you don’t notice the touches lingering on you. Even a five-years old could notice how obvious it is, but no, you guys act like you’re blind.”
His fists were clenched tight at his sides, eyes shut as he tried to force the tears away. He stomped towards the door, opening it with more force necessary, and announced, “I’m going out.” And slammed it shut.
Baekhyun was left alone on Jongin’s bed, legs still up to his chest as he whimpered pathetically. Never has he ever thought that he would be used for someone else to get what they want. He never thought of the touches that seemed to linger on longer than they should have; he thought it was all friendly interaction. Baekhyun only agreed to this because he wanted Chanyeol to finally notice his best friend, but it only backfired in the end.
This may possibly be the worst decision he’s ever made in his entire life.
He most likely lost two friends, both of whom were in love with one another in unrequited love. Baekhyun never felt love such as them. He only thought of them as close friends.
Baekhyun rested his forehead on the top of his knees, hugging them close to his chest. He whispered to himself, “I should have left instead.”
From: Byun Baekhyun
Okay, I’ll do it. I don’t think it’s the brightest idea, though? Especially with how Chanyeol overreacts to everything…
From: Jongin
baek, you know you’re also my best friend, right?
From: Byun Baekhyun
Yeah. What’s your point?
From: Jongin
best friends help each other, especially when it comes to this, right? come on baek
From: Byun Baekhyun
I’ll have to see if he’s okay with it, though. because if i’m going to act like your boyfriend and if you want it to be convincing…
From: Jongin
oh my god baek i love you you’re the greatest friend ever
From: Byun Baekhyun
I know I am. but seriously, i don’t think it’s a good idea but i’m only doing this because you’re my friend, Jongin.
From: Jongin
*Best friend i think you mean.
shit, Chanyeol’s coming back from the kitchen. we’re doing movie/game night tonight
From: Byun Baekhyun
Wish I could join you :( but i’ll talk to kyungsoo, now. bye!
From: Jongin
Say hi to hyung for me~
“So, what were you doing on your phone this time?” Chanyeol walked around the couch, setting down the bowl of popcorn and some drinks onto the coffee table before plopping next to his friend. Jongin shrugged, smiling.
“Nothing special.” His phone vibrated in his hands, and he quickly turned it on to find a new message.
From: Dyo Kyungsoo
Okay.
►
Title: Say something (i think i'm giving up on you)
Pairing(s): Chanyeol/Kai,[Spoiler]unrequited Baekhyun/Chanyeol, brief Baekhyun/Kai, Baekhyun/Kyungsoo, endgame Sehun/Kai, unrequited Chanyeol/Kai
Rating: PG-13
Length: 12.6k
Summary: Chanyeol can be oblivious to many things, even to the things that may lead to the end. Best Friends!AU
Author's note: //apologizes profusely
i took this prompt and blew it up to hell, no lie. this is just one big mess of everything so i apologize if this isn't exactly what you... expected. i hope you enjoy it though! it's pure angst tho so i hope you're okay with that...
also just want to thank my two friends for helping me with this fic! especially my kitten and bae <3
“How do I look?”
Jongin looks up from his phone to find Chanyeol staring at him, waiting for a response. He shrugs, not caring as he looks back to the screen of his phone. Chanyeol sighs, turning around to observe himself in the mirror again.
It was half past six in the morning, and Chanyeol called Jongin all the way to his house for opinions about his looks. It’s ridiculous because everyone wears the same uniform according to their respectful gender, but Chanyeol decides he wants to impress someone with his dashing looks. Jongin barely said a word to him regarding his new look. Chanyeol ditched the big specs he wore and went for contact lenses, and his usual mushroom cut was gelled to an updo. Jongin honestly thinks Chanyeol looks ridiculous, but he knows his friend doesn’t care.
Chanyeol has always been oblivious to many things. Whether it be to a conversation topic, to where they’re even headed while out, Chanyeol is a major grade A idiot when it comes to noticing someone else’s feelings. It hurts Jongin, honestly it does. Jongin’s been friends with Chanyeol since the start of middle school and the two have been inseparable.
Ever since the two entered high school, Chanyeol has been trying to notice some other guy’s attention. At first, Jongin was confused because it was a guy, but then he soon realized that he slowly started to fall for his best friend ever since the first time he felt jealousy rise up in his chest. It was when he introduced Chanyeol to his other friend.
His name is Baekhyun. Byun Baekhyun. He’s a year above than they are, making him a junior. The boy is nothing extravagant in Jongin’s own opinion. Call it being self-centered or being a prick, he really dislikes Baekhyun, even if they know each other well enough.
Before, Baekhyun was Jongin’s pretty average friend. If Chanyeol wasn’t around or was busy with other things, Jongin would hang out with Baekhyun. The two met in one of their shared classes between upper and lower classmen, and they were told to choose a partner for an assignment. Jongin didn’t know many of the students in the class, so Baekhyun decided to introduce himself.
Jongin thinks Baekhyun as an option rather than a friend. Chanyeol is definitely a friend to Jongin, but it seems like he’s pulling the line each morning before school starts.
Even when Jongin doesn’t answer Chanyeol’s questions about Baekhyun, he doesn’t stop. He never does, and it annoys him to no end.
“Jongin,” says Chanyeol. He glances at his friend, not even moving his head. “Do you think he won’t mind the sudden change? Is it too much?”
Baekhyun was never a fan of change. He always wanted to stick to old traditional ways.
“No,” He waves his hand, “It’s fine. He won’t mind.” Jongin doesn’t ignore the feeling of guilt in his chest.
“Perfect!” Chanyeol beams, throwing away all of the wasted products he used on himself. He walks over to his bed, grabbing his bag that laid on top. Jongin stayed put at his friend’s chair, continuing to browse on his phone.
Chanyeol yanks the device from Jongin’s grasp, looking at the screen. It wasn’t like Chanyeol didn’t notice Jongin’s speedy fingers tapping over the touchscreen. Jongin hears Chanyeol laugh, and his heart flutters. It actually almost makes him sick.
“Really?” Chanyeol shows the screen at Jongin. It shows a page of a popular manga. “You’re reading comics this early?” Jongin grabs his phone quickly, shutting it off. He stands from the chair and grabs his bag, swinging over his shoulder.
“Are you ready to go or not? It’s nearly seven.” His friend stares at him with a dumb look on his face, but then again, he always has a dumb look.
Unfortunately it’s the dumb look Jongin fell for.
“Sure!” Chanyeol smiles with nearly all his teeth showing. “Can we…” He starts, “Can we pass by Baekhyun’s house and ask if he wants to walk with us?”
No.
“Alright.”
Chanyeol loves Jongin, but Chanyeol also loves Baekhyun. Chanyeol loves both Jongin and Baekhyun, but love is used in different contexts. Love is a strange word because it can have so many meanings behind it, despite it only being four letters. Chanyeol loves Jongin because he’s a great friend. The two get along well with each other ever since the first day they saw each other. Even when Chanyeol has been talking nonstop about his Baekhyun, Jongin still hasn’t shown any signs of annoyance at all (he thinks; he hasn’t noticed anything different).
Chanyeol loves Baekhyun almost in the same context as Jongin. Baekhyun is great to be around with, much like his close friend. Ever since Jongin introduced the two, he couldn’t take his eyes off of him. At times, Chanyeol catches himself staring at the older boy. Chanyeol was the first to talk to Jongin about Baekhyun regarding dating, of all things.
The two never discussed topics regarding their feelings because it didn’t seem to fit their relationship early on. Their friendship is one where you hang out and about with, play video games with, talk about anything but your personal feelings. Chanyeol’s main focus is getting Baekhyun to ask him out, and he’s not very good at handling his own feelings. Because of that, he isn’t the best at noticing anyone else’s.
Chanyeol isn’t sure why, but things feel different with Jongin, especially when the two are alone. Despite being friends for five years, things aren’t the same as they were in their first year of high school. Jongin seems to have grown quiet with not only Chanyeol, but Baekhyun as well. Baekhyun’s been friends with Jongin since freshman year or last year of middle school, Chanyeol isn’t sure.
But that’s of the past. Chanyeol’s more focused on getting Baekhyun’s attention, and of course Kim Jongin, his best friend, will support him.
Right?
Yeah, he totally will.
That’s the kind of friend Jongin is. He’s supportive and backs Chanyeol up no matter what. But when he comes to think of it… What does he do for Jongin?
“Hey,” says a familiar voice. Chanyeol sees a hand waving in front of his eyes, “Are you awake or what?” He follows the hand as it falls back to the owner’s side. It was Baekhyun, his small puppy like face smiling at him. Chanyeol felt his heart rate increase dramatically. Baekhyun stood between him and Jongin, looking even smaller compared to the two other’s height.
Chanyeol fakes a laugh, “I don’t know. Am I?” He hears Baekhyun’s wonderful laugh, and Chanyeol smiles from ear to ear. He glances up from Baekhyun’s smiling face and looks at Jongin’s profile view. His friend is completely silent, one ear bud facing away from the two. He has his phone on hand, not taking his eyes off of it as he scrolls down whatever he’s on.
Chanyeol can’t help but feel that Jongin looks… angry, annoyed even. For a moment Chanyeol worries, but having Baekhyun tug at his arm to pay attention to the path distracts him.
He doesn’t notice the way Jongin looked at him when he laughed alongside with Baekhyun.
The three continued on towards school, separating into different homerooms according to their years. The teacher has yet to enter yet, and Chanyeol heads over to Jongin for a conversation. Jongin always sits in the back, while Chanyeol is usually in the middle of the classroom. He pulls over a seat from an empty desk and brings it over to his friend, nudging him with his elbow.
Jongin looks up at him and pulls out his ear bud, face stoic. “What?” Chanyeol ignored the slight annoyance in his voice. He put on a grin on his face and grabbed his phone.
“You,” He motioned towards Jongin, “need to stop going on your phone.” Chanyeol waves the device back and forth, emphasizing his point. Jongin rolls his eyes and snatches it out of his hand. “Seriously, you’ve been on it ever since you came to my house.”
Jongin shrugged, tugging his phone into his pants pocket. “Maybe you’re just getting a little boring, Yeol.” Chanyeol actually felt offended at his friend’s words, bring a hand to his heart to show his (mock?) hurt. “I’m kidding.” Jongin momentarily brought a finger to his chin, tapping it. He grinned, “Maybe.”
Chanyeol laughed, pushing his friend slightly on his shoulder. He didn’t put much force into it, but it still caused Jongin to nearly fall back. “Then I’ll just have to up my game!”
Jongin scoffed, “Sorry, Yeol. You’ve been getting old ever since Baekhyun’s been hanging out with us-” He stopped.
His friend looked at him, squinting since he can’t push up his frames on the bridge of his nose like before. The longer Chanyeol stared, the more Jongin grew nervous. It wasn’t until Chanyeol laughed heartily did Jongin break from his frozen spell.
“Have I?” A mighty pat on Jongin’s back, “You’re right! I’ve been using all the old jokes on him, just like how you and I used to be!” Jongin stiffens, hearing the past tense. When Chanyeol says it like that, it doesn’t sound that big of a deal. But in Jongin’s mind, it means nothing is the same as before. As usual, Chanyeol doesn’t seem to notice.
The bell rings, indicating the start of class. The students shuffle in and out of the classroom. Chanyeol stands up, fixing the chair to its rightful desk. He waves, smiling, “On the roof or outside?” Chanyeol refers to their lunch break. Baekhyun, Chanyeol, and Jongin along with other friends have been alternating on where to eat lunch.
Jongin stares at his friend.
“Roof.”
Turns out the gods above decided to make Jongin’s day worse by having him witness Baekhyun and Chanyeol basically flirting with each other. Everyone decided to eat in their classrooms, some students leaving and entering to be with their friends. Baekhyun and Sehun walked into the classroom, Chanyeol immediately greeting the two as they walk towards Jongin’s desk.
Sehun is a friend of Baekhyun, despite being a freshman. Jongin was introduced first to Sehun, and then to Chanyeol, following the rest of their other friends. Honestly, Jongin is grateful that Baekhyun brought Sehun along. At least he’ll have someone to talk to during their lunch break. Sort of.
Jongin pulls out his phone out of his pocket, only to have Chanyeol snatch it away from him for what seems like the third time of the day already.
“What is your problem with my phone?” Jongin snaps, standing up, but Chanyeol doesn’t sense the malice in his voice. He’s so fucking oblivious.
Chanyeol puts it into his back pocket, “My problem is,” He crosses his arms, looking at his friend. “You need to stop going on your phone and start talking! You’ve barely been talking at all..” Jongin falls to his seat, huffing like a little child. Chanyeol now senses that Jongin is upset and sits next to him, bringing his lunch towards him.
“What’s up, man?” asks Chanyeol, eyes concerned. Jongin almost wants to laugh. “You really don’t talk to me a lot now. Something bothering you?” Jongin doesn’t answer, but his stomach rumbles instead. Chanyeol grins. “Ahh, so my friend is hungry, isn’t he?” He pushes the lunch box towards Jongin. “It’s cool, you can have it. I’ll just snag some of Baekhyun and Sehun’s lunch.”
“Excuse you.” Sehun bites back.
“You’re excused!” Baekhyun and Chanyeol say in unison. Their laughter is the loudest in the class, but no one else pays attention to it.
Jongin opens the lunch box that Chanyeol packed. It’s fried chicken, one of Jongin’s favorite dishes. He looks up at his friend, seeing his big goofy grin as he laughs along with Baekhyun. Sehun keeps a complete stoic face, only eating his lunch as he rolls his eyes at the two. Jongin chuckles, though bitterly.
“You should take what I said this morning into consideration.”
Chanyeol glances at Jongin, wiping tears from his eyes.
“I’m sorry, what did you say, Jongin?”
Sehun’s eyes focus on Jongin.
“Nothing.”
Things have been going pretty smoothly for Chanyeol. Minus Jongin, he thinks he’s gotten closer with Baekhyun (strangely it affects Chanyeol when he thinks of minus Jongin). Maybe he’ll eventually ask him out on a date or something, considering how Baekhyun seems so at ease with him. Jongin, on the other hand… Chanyeol is so worried for Jongin.
Their friendship doesn’t appear to be the same anymore, especially after Baekhyun came into their lives. Well, more so his. Jongin’s grown quiet, when he used to be lively just as Chanyeol himself. The boy uses his phone more than usual, which may seem normal to some but it’s a concern that won’t escape Chanyeol. It’s a strange feeling in his chest when he sees his friend so quiet. He almost looks as if…
As if he’s alone.
That’s the last thing Chanyeol wants, for Jongin to be alone. Jongin doesn’t deserve to be alone at all. It pains Chanyeol’s heart to not hear his friend’s laugh, or see his smile, a genuine smile. Any true friend of Jongin would know the difference between a genuine smile and a bullshit one.
When Jongin puts on a fake smile, he doesn’t smile with his teeth. He only brings his pink, full lips into a curve. His eyes don’t crinkle up into cute little moon crescents. It’s followed by some terrible lie too, if prompted. Chanyeol finds every aspect about Jongin cute, adorable, and very attractive, but it’s all platonic.
Chanyeol loves seeing Jongin truly smile. It shows how beautiful he can be (totally normal to say about your male friend). His pearly white teeth show when he smiles, and he laughs sometimes as well. Chanyeol loves seeing Jongin laugh, his voice is wonderful. Just like every fiber of Jongin’s being. Plus, his personality is something you won’t find in anyone else other than him.
Jongin can be introverted, just like how he has been recently with Chanyeol. He doesn’t know why Jongin’s been so reclusive, and he hates himself for not knowing Jongin better. But sometimes there are things that even the closest of friends do not know of.
Jongin can also be very cute, Chanyeol thinks to himself when he sees his friend pouting occasionally. He’s also caring, sweet, and very supportive even in the sidelines. He’ll speak up if things bother him, or he’ll speak about his feelings. It’s not often, but sometimes he does.
Chanyeol’s just rambling on and on about Jongin, his best friend in the entire world that he completely shares platonic feelings with.
That’s how much Chanyeol cares about Jongin. There are so many things that he can say about his friend, and it won’t be taken in a wrong way.
But what really bothers Chanyeol is why Jongin doesn’t talk about his feelings at all. He doesn’t know why, but it feels like something’s wrong. Whether it be with him, friends, or Jongin himself, it’s an uncomfortable feeling and Chanyeol doesn’t like it one bit.
He tries to ignore this strange feeling in his gut as he walks out of the school gates with Jongin.
“Chanyeol, Jongin!” yells Baekhyun. The two turn around, watching their small friend run towards them. “I have to stay after school to makeup a test. Sorry I couldn’t hang out with you guys today.”
Chanyeol glances at Jongin’s stone cold face. He isn’t sure if his friend tensed or not, but he did put on one of his fake smiles. “It’s alright.” He shrugs, “Maybe tomorrow, yeah?” Baekhyun nods.
“I’ll text you both later.” He starts to run the other way, waving, “See you on Monday!” The two wave back at Baekhyun, turning their backs once he’s out of view. They start walking home, the scent of wet pavement strong in the air.
Chanyeol and Jongin walk in silence towards his home, Jongin now on his phone once again after Chanyeol gave it back once lunch was over. He could faintly hear the track playing from Jongin’s earbud. He always listened to music at a deafening volume.
Deciding he can’t take the silence anymore with his closest friend, Chanyeol says, “It’s a shame Baekhyun can’t hang out with us on the weekend anymore, isn’t it?” He adds a quick laugh, trying not to sound forced, but it only makes it sound exactly that.
Jongin didn’t even look at Chanyeol when he answers. “Yeah.”
One word. It’s always one word these days. Chanyeol sighs, now feeling dejected. Things don’t seem right anymore, and it confuses him. What happened to the old Jongin?
They continue walking in silence, not one of them making an effort to talk. Over the course of the day, Chanyeol’s eyes grew irritated due of his contacts. Because of that, his eyes grew red and began to tear. It was during one of his elective classes with both Jongin and Baekhyun. The latter stared at Chanyeol for quite some time at their group table while working on an assignment.
“Are you okay?” Baekhyun took a handkerchief from his school jacket’s pocket and leaned over. He dabbed at the edges of Chanyeol’s eyes. “You look like you’re crying…”
Chanyeol froze, unable to move. Baekhyun, the boy he most certainly has a crush on, is doing something that not many male friends would do with each other. He sat still, waiting for Baekhyun to pull back. Chanyeol’s eyes focused onto Baekhyun’s face, memorizing every feature on his smooth skin. His heart was beating so fast that it was almost deafening in his ears. It took his all to not lean in and capture the older boy’s lips.
He didn’t hear Jongin excuse himself to use the restroom.
“There,” Baekhyun finally said. He sat back in his seat and smiled, “I think you should wear your glasses instead, Chanyeol. You look a lot better with them.” The boy fiddled with the hairs of his own bangs, “And you should put your hair down too. The updo looks too… greasy.”
“Jongin told me you would like that! He said you’re totally okay with change, or something.”
Baekhyun froze only for a moment, but Chanyeol didn’t notice it. “Oh, um-”
They heard a chair scraping against the floor, causing them both to cringe. Jongin sat down, resuming his work. Chanyeol never noticed he left.
“Where were you?”
“Nowhere.”
And that was that.
Somehow, Chanyeol can’t help but feel that he is at fault for causing Jongin to act this way. For causing Jongin to act differently. But thankfully, some things haven’t changed, such as staying at each other’s house after school. Baekhyun comes too, but only on weekdays, due to practice for afterschool activities. Jongin walks in and heads upstairs towards Chanyeol’s bedroom. He follows after his friend, noticing that Jongin’s phone vibrates in his hand.
Once they closed the door of Chanyeol’s room, he finds Jongin already plopped on the bed, eyes glued to his phone and fingers swiftly moving across the screen. His ear buds are out too. Chanyeol thinks of grabbing the boy’s phone for the billionth time today, but he decides against it. He’s caused Jongin too much pain already, he thinks.
Chanyeol sets down his bag and heads towards his chair by his desk. He opens his laptop, immediately clicking the browser icon and selecting a playlist online to play though his speakers. It’s rap music; he and Jongin have always been big fans of rap.
Next, he grabs the small little container that are supposed to hold his contacts and places it on the desk. He has much difficulty getting them out, and he even hears Jongin laugh when he accidentally pokes himself in the eye. “Son of a bitch,” muttered Chanyeol when he closed the container now containing the lens. He’s going to stick with his glasses for a while longer.
Chanyeol opened an app on his laptop, turning on his computer’s built-in webcam. He checks himself out, running his fingers through his greasy, gelled hair. After staring at himself for a good minute or two, he decides that he does look better with glasses. The new hairstyle… not so much. He closes the tab of the playlist, deciding that a comfortable- if you can call it that - silence is better.
He swivels his chair around, stopping once he faces Jongin. “You know, you barely talk much now.”
Immediately Jongin’s reply came, “That’s because you talk too much.”
“And you’re always on your phone.”
“It’s not that different from before.”
“You’ve also been really rude to me, or anyone for that matter.”
“People change, Chanyeol. Get used to it.”
Chanyeol stands up and walks towards Jongin, shadow towering over Jongin’s sprawled figure on bed. Jongin looks up at him. “What is with you?” He shouts. "I’ve done nothing wrong towards you, yet you talk to me like we’re enemies!” He throws his hands up in the air, tolerance running thin.
Jongin sits up from bed and looks directly at Chanyeol, “Maybe we are!” He screamed with so much force, so much emotion, so much… anger. Chanyeol steps back from his friend’s tone. Never in his life did he ever hear Jongin shout at him like that.
“Maybe you’re just too fucking oblivious to even notice it! You’re not the only one who's had enough!” Jongin runs a hand through his hair.
He stands up abruptly, marching out of the room. Jongin slams the door open and announces, “I’m going to the bathroom.” And then the door is slammed shut. Chanyeol winces from the noise.
Was that my first fight with Jongin? It may have been brief, but there was so much anger in Jongin’s voice that it froze Chanyeol on the spot. The two have yelled at each other, but it was all for fun. They’re playful, and things aren’t really taken seriously between the two. Chanyeol has half a mind to go to Jongin, ask him if he’s alright or if anything is wrong (of course something’s wrong; that’s how you got in this mess in the first place).
Chanyeol noticed Jongin left his phone on the bed. It just vibrated, causing him to jump from the noise. There’s a green LED light coming from it, and he knows that’s a notification. The two nearly have the same model. He has no idea why he’s leaning towards the bed, and he’s almost unaware that his hand is reaching for his friend’s phone. It’s like his body did it on its own.
He turns it on, the notification of the text message showing up. It’s on Kakaotalk and it’s from Baekhyun.
From: Byun Baekhyun
Okay, I’ll do it. I don’t think it’s the brightest idea, though? Especially with how…
The entirety of the message is cut off because the preview box is too small. Chanyeol taps on the notification but is prompted to put in the password. Not that difficult, he thinks to himself, typing in Jongin’s birthday. Chanyeol’s used Jongin’s phone plenty of times, despite-
940114
Incorrect
Chanyeol stares at the phone in confusion. That’s always been the password for Jongin’s phone. He tries again, this time in a different order.
011494
Incorrect
Again.
140994
Incorrect
Again.
091494
Incorrect
149401
Incorrect
099414
Incorrect
The door creaks open, and Chanyeol quickly turns off the phone and throws it back onto the bed. He stands still like a soldier, arms to his side and back straight. Jongin walks through the door, and closes it quietly. Chanyeol can see a faint red or pink tinge on Jongin’s cheeks. He was either crying, or he’s shy to apologize. Chanyeol honestly can’t tell.
“S-Sorry,” says Jongin as he walks up to Chanyeol. There isn’t much of a height difference, but Chanyeol still is the tallest. “I didn’t mean to yell at you. There’s just some things going on.” He rubs the back of his neck, a habit Jongin often does when he’s embarrassed.
Chanyeol continues to listen, “I didn’t mean that we’re enemies. You’re my best friend, Chanyeol. I would never mean something like that, I swear.” His friend refuses to look at him in the eye. Chanyeol stares at him, now that Jongin has finished talking, he looks closely at Jongin’s face. His eyes seem red, so it does look like he may have shed a few tears. The blush on his face still has yet to go away, and the boy is pouting. He looks like a ten year old.
“You’re so cute,” Chanyeol says aloud. Jongin turns his head at Chanyeol, eyes wide. Chanyeol decided to embrace his friends, Jongin trapped in his arms. “Jongin, you’re so cute when you’re sorry, but you shouldn’t be sorry. Oh my god, it’s all my fault. I’m sorry that I made you upset forgive me.” He says out all at once. Jongin stiffened in Chanyeol’s hold, but quickly relaxed and pat his friend on the back, though carefully.
“I’m sorry too.” Another pat. “Now let go of me,” He hits Chanyeol hard on the back, a loud thump coming from it. Chanyeol cries out in pain. “I need to get my phone.” Jongin pushes his friend off and grabs his phone from the bed, stuffing it in his pocket.
“Jongin?” Chanyeol calls. His friend hums, “Um, actually, never mind. Let’s head downstairs.” Jongin’s already out the door by the time Chanyeol finishes his sentence. He decided that it would be best to not ask about Baekhyun, or what he was talking about with him. He knows that the two are close friends as well, and they all haven’t quite exactly told each other’s secrets to one another, but… He is curious as to why Jongin changed his password. More importantly…
What did Baekhyun agree to?
Chanyeol pushes the question to the back of his mind as he trudges downstairs, watching Jongin fiddle around the shelf containing the games and DVDs.
Even though they spend an enjoyable evening together, the question doesn’t leave Chanyeol’s mind.
Monday comes quicker than expected, and Chanyeol is greeted with Jongin and Baekhyun standing at his doorstep. It was fifteen minutes before seven, and he was heading over to Jongin’s house. He eyes the two strangely, seeing how they seem more radiant than usual, especially Jongin. His best friend is actually smiling after, what, weeks of being a brat?
He closes the door, fixing the bag on his shoulder. “What’s up with you two?” They walk down the porch together. Chanyeol takes his usual side by Baekhyun, who stands in between both him and Jongin. Chanyeol looks down at Baekhyun, and - scratch that, Baekhyun doesn’t look radiant than usual.
Something is bothering Baekhyun, and it’s clear to Chanyeol. He doesn’t know about Jongin, who’s talking animatedly to Baekhyun. The oldest of the three nods his head, smiling and laughing here and there. But there’s something amiss… Of course Chanyeol would notice after trying to get Baekhyun to recognize his own feelings.
It seems that whenever he laughs or smile, it’s forced. It’s something like with Jongin before their little ‘fight’ on Friday, but there’s a different feel to it. Chanyeol may not be the smartest of the three, but he can definitely read others. Definitely. He can tell that Baekhyun’s feeling nervous about something, because he darts his eyes over to Chanyeol for a quick glance and reverts his gaze. Chanyeol feels confused and a little bit left out.
Without thinking, he asks, “Baekhyun, why do you look… anxious?”
Baekhyun stiffens for a bit, and he can see that Jongin looks up at him quickly, before looking at Baekhyun. He laughs, sounding forced once again, and shakes his head. “It’s nothing, Yeol. It’s… just school. Just a test in one of my classes, that’s all.”
Chanyeol calls bullshit, but he doesn’t say. Instead, he says, “Oh. Well, will you be able to hang out after school, Jongin’s place?”
Baekhyun quickly denies, shaking his head. “I can’t,” A quick glance down at the ground, “I have to do something for the club today! Yeah, we have… practice, because we’re going to be performing somewhere this week-”
“And you haven’t told us?” He doesn’t mean to sound rude, but it’s just that Baekhyun’s never mentioned such a thing before.
Jongin lightly punches Chanyeol on his arm, earning an over exaggerated cry of pain from him. “Chanyeol,” He says like a parent warning their child, “Baek’s just been busy. Quit being an ass and walk.” He scoffs, crossing his arms, though he sees a smile forming on his friend’s lips.
Chanyeol feels a smile on his lips too, but he feels more confused than anything else.
Chanyeol walks into the practice room during lunch used by the Music Club.
“Hey, Kyungsoo.”
He’s a short little owl-eyed boy who is also in the Music Club, along with Baekhyun and his other friend, Jongdae. Kyungsoo is the youngest in the club, but he’s one of the most feared. It may be for his voice, sure, he’s got an amazing voice, but there’s also another reason. Though, it’s better left being unsaid.
Kyungsoo stands in front of Chanyeol, looking up at him. His heart-shaped lips break into a quick smile. “Hey, Chanyeol. What are you doing here?”
Chanyeol fidgets in his spot, “Um, I was curious about something, actually.” Kyungsoo stares at the older boy. Chanyeol continues on, “Does the club have practice today?”
“No, we don’t. Why’d you ask?”
So Baekhyun lied. That would explain why he looked so nervous this morning. Lying was never Baekhyun’s strong point.
“No reason,” he shrugs. “Are you guys also performing anywhere this week, or something?” No immediate answer came from Kyungsoo. Chanyeol waited, the two staring down each other, though there was something in his eyes. It looked familiar; it looked like Baekhyun’s eyes from this morning.
“Chanyeol,” He said slowly, “Who told you this?”
Immediately he blurted out, “Baekhyun.”
There it is. The familiar sense of nervousness in Kyungsoo’s eyes as well.
“No, we’re not performing anywhere at all this month.”
“Oh. Thanks.”
Chanyeol turns around, heading back towards his classroom instead, knowing the bell will ring soon for their next period. As he’s almost out of the door, he hears the sound of a phone unlocking in the quiet room. He continues walking, even after hearing Kyungsoo speak a familiar name.
“Baekhyun."
Something is a little off, Chanyeol senses as he walks alone to Jongin’s house. He texted his friend, wondering where he is, but no reply came. Chanyeol waited at the school gates for fifteen minutes before deciding to walk alone. It’s weird, he thinks, since Jongin never said anything to him. Jongin isn’t part of any after school activities, so something must have happened. That, or maybe Jongin is sleeping at home. Chanyeol doesn’t really know, but he’s looking forward to tonight.
Every time he goes to Jongin’s house, they watch movies and shows. A new anime came out today, and Chanyeol just knows that it’s a must watch on Jongin’s list. Chanyeol and Jongin have always shared the same interests, and Chanyeol wonders if he’s setting up his TV for it, waiting for him. That’s how it’s been in previous years; Jongin always waited for Chanyeol, even if he took his sweet time.
He must admit that he feels bad for making Jongin wait for him. He’s usually with Baekhyun when he walks to Jongin’s house, and the two get distracted by a stray animal or going to the corner store nearby. One time, when Chanyeol walked alone just like today, he found Jongin sleeping in his bed instead, laptop already hooked up to the television.
Jongin looked like a child on that day… He even mumbled some words in his sleep. Chanyeol’s not creepy for watching his best friend sleep, of course. Definitely not, even if he looked at how soft Jongin’s hair appeared, how his lips parted slightly with each breath, and how he resisted the temptation to draw on his friend’s face.
Definitely not creepy.
But something bothers Chanyeol. He’s nearly at Jongin’s home now, but Baekhyun keeps coming to his mind. First, it’s the message on Friday when he checked Jongin’s phone. He never did find out what did he agree to, and he’s not even sure if he wants to find out. Who is this ‘he’ that Baekhyun mentioned?
Another is what Kyungsoo said today. Kyungsoo is close with the three of them, but more with Baekhyun. His eyes looked like they grew larger when he said his friend’s name, but Chanyeol’s grew even wider when he heard Kyungsoo speak it after he left. Kyungsoo definitely called Baekhyun, but what the hell did they talk about?
The question still lingers in Chanyeol’s mind as he opens the door of Jongin’s home. One day, Jongin’s home is going to be robbed because he doesn’t lock the doors, Chanyeol laughs to himself. He removes his shoes at the door and puts them aside. The house is empty and almost deafeningly quiet.
He calls out, “Hey, Jongin! I’m going up!” The thuds of his feet on the stairs are the only noise in the house. Bag slung over his shoulder, he pauses and looks down at the living room. He notices that the place is still spotless. Looks like they’re going to watch in Jongin’s room tonight.
Chanyeol has an internal debate within himself as he stands in front of his friend’s room. The questions in his head are either ‘Ask Jongin why he didn’t wait for me’ or ‘Ask him if he knew about Baekhyun’. Chanyeol’s leaning more towards the first question, since there could be a possibility of Jongin not knowing… but then again, he could know something since the two are also close friends with each other.
“Ah, shit,” Chanyeol groaned as a headache slowly crept upon him. He should really stop thinking, it’s not like him to think too much. Instead, Chanyeol grabs the handle of the door and turns it, opening the door with much force.
“Surprise- Oh.” His sentence stops abruptly as he sees Jongin on the bed, shirtless with another body beneath him. From where he stood, Chanyeol couldn’t clearly see the other person’s face. Unconsciously, he felt his legs move towards the bed. The two seemed to be kissing sloppily, not caring that Chanyeol stood right besides them.
A soft groan came from the body beneath Jongin. Chanyeol heard Jongin chuckle against the boys lips.
Jongin pulled away from other’s face. It was a boy. It was Baekhyun. Chanyeol felt his soul leaving his body when he clearly saw his face.
Chanyeol’s grip on his bag tightened, and he has half a mind to swing it right onto Jongin’s smirking face. Baekhyun propped himself on his elbows, something along the lines of worry or concern on his face. Chanyeol didn’t notice.
Silence. Deafening silence washed over the room just like a tidal wave. It was suffocating, and Chanyeol couldn’t feel himself breathe.
“Hi, Chanyeol.” says Jongin, the first one to break the silence. Chanyeol can see the saliva from the two’s kiss sheen in the afternoon rays let by the window. He felt something twist in his gut.
He heard himself audibly gulp, and his throat started to hurt. It felt hot in the room, and his throat felt like it was burning. Chanyeol opened his mouth, trying to find his voice.
Eventually, he muttered, “Jongin…” It was barely loud as a whisper, and the words he wanted to say after dissipated into nothingness as he stared at his two friends in front of him.
Apparently Jongin seemed to know what he was going to say, and merely shrugged, the fucking smirk of his still on his face. “Don’t worry, it’s just an experiment.”
Chanyeol wanted to call bullshit, but instead, he said, “Experiment?” He breathed out shakily, “You call this an experiment? I don’t think this is a fucking experiment with the way that you sucked on each other’s faces.” He can hear his own voice rising steadily with each word, and god knows how long it’ll be until he punches Jongin straight on the jaw.
He laughs. Jongin fucking laughs, and never in his life has he felt this much anger from his laugh. “You know, maybe you’re right. Maybe this isn’t a fucking experiment,” Jongin turned to look at Baekhyun. Chanyeol couldn’t bear to look at him right now. “Right, Baekhyun? Tell Chanyeol that this isn’t an experiment. Tell him how long we’ve been doing this with each other behind his back.”
No response came from Baekhyun.
Jongin leaned down, gripping the boy's shoulders tightly that could leave a hand-shaped bruise for days. He whispered right into his ear, “Fucking tell him right now.” Jongin’s hot breath ghosting over the shell of his ear. Baekhyun shivered. He doesn’t know out of fear or because of Jongin himself.
Chanyeol closed his eyes, waiting for Baekhyun’s answer. He truly doesn’t know what to anticipate from the other, and he felt his entire body trembling out of fear. For the time that Chanyeol has known Baekhyun, he’s very innocent. Baekhyun may be mischievous and a joker, but he isn’t a liar. Well, he hopes so. Chanyeol’s only known him for a year and-
“No.” He shut his eyes even tighter, “No, this isn’t an experiment. We’re…” Baekhyun looked at Jongin, receiving a deadly glare from him. Chanyeol felt himself hold his breath. “We’ve been dating for the past month.”
It’s strange. Chanyeol thought hearing Baekhyun confirm such a thing would cause his world to crash down on him. He thought he would physically and emotionally feel his heart shattering into pieces all at once, but instead… Chanyeol feels nothing. The anger that slowly crept up in his voice when he spoke disappeared, like it wasn’t there in the first place. The feelings of betrayal felt like it didn’t even exist at this moment. Everything that Chanyeol idolized about Baekhyun was gone, like it vanished into thin air. Chanyeol felt absolutely nothing.
It’s almost like his world is now nothing.
Chanyeol exhaled the breath he was apparently holding, his grip on his bag loosening that it nearly fell off his shoulder. He breathed in the tension of the room, feeling Jongin’s angry eyes at him. He bowed his head, the frames of his glasses sliding down the bridge of his nose slightly.
“I’m sorry for interrupting you two.” Chanyeol murmurs, bowing down once again as he makes his way toward the door. He isn’t sure if he felt tears pricking the corners of his eyes or not, and his chest started to hurt. He felt nothing emotionally, but his body is reacting and it pains him physically.
The door creaked open and it was almost deafening in the silent room. Chanyeol shuts it closed, his pace increasing as he walked down the stairs, quickly throwing his shoes on and ran out of Jongin’s house. He never looked back as he walked a few houses down towards his own. There were no cars outside; his parents aren’t home yet. Chanyeol ran into his house and immediately went up the stairs into his room. He stood there at the closed door of his room, back hitting the door as he slid down. He ran a hand through his hair and removed his glasses. He felt the tears already escaping his eyes as he sat there on the cold wooden floor.
Jongin got off of Baekhyun, practically being shoved off the shorter male. He nearly landed on his bum until his legs were quick enough to catch himself from falling. Jongin had half a mind to yell at him, but froze when he saw Baekhyun tremble.
The boy was mumbling to himself that it was practically incoherent. His knees were up this his chest as he sat against the headboard of the bed, and his hands were gripping tightly on his hair. Jongin made a move to remove those delicate hands, but they were swatted away. Jongin swore under his breath as he felt the sting on the back of his hand.
“I can’t believe I did that,” His voice quivered, “I can’t believe I fucking did that. Why did I fucking agree with you? Jongin, why?” Baekhyun screamed, squeezing his eyes shut. He screamed so loud that Jongin flinched, feeling frightened for a moment.
But then, Jongin realized how fragile Baekhyun looked in front of him. He is the oldest of the three, but he looks like a child. He’s in fetal position, hands up to his ears shutting in the nonexistent noise in his head. Whimpers, cries, sobs - whatever - escaped his small lips. Tears nearly fell from his eyes, and he saw Baekhyun press his palms to his ears harder. Jongin doesn’t know if he should speak louder for Baekhyun to hear him.
“He needs to know how I’ve felt for the past years I’ve known him, Baekhyun.”
Baekhyun cracks an eye open, almost mechanically turning his head to face Jongin. His eyes were glistening, but no tears fell. Jongin swallowed the feeling of guilt down his throat.
“But why did I have to be brought into this? Why didn’t you just tell him?” It was barely a whisper did his fragile voice manage, but Jongin heard it clearly. He decided that Baekhyun deserves to - needs to - know the truth.
“I love him, Baekhyun. But Chanyeol loves you. He’s my best friend, the fucking idiot that I fell in love with, but he fell in love with you. You’re my best friend too, don’t get me wrong, but I’ve known him longer. He talks nonstop about you, asking for my opinions to impress you.” The pain in his chest felt like it was going to burst. Jongin breathed and continued.
“I have to deal with him talking about you every fucking day. Do you not know how I feel?” Jongin nearly yells, but manages to keep his voice down. He didn’t give Baekhyun enough time to answer. “No, no you don’t. Both of you are fucking oblivious, that’s why. Chanyeol doesn’t notice the way I stare at him, and you don’t notice the touches lingering on you. Even a five-years old could notice how obvious it is, but no, you guys act like you’re blind.”
His fists were clenched tight at his sides, eyes shut as he tried to force the tears away. He stomped towards the door, opening it with more force necessary, and announced, “I’m going out.” And slammed it shut.
Baekhyun was left alone on Jongin’s bed, legs still up to his chest as he whimpered pathetically. Never has he ever thought that he would be used for someone else to get what they want. He never thought of the touches that seemed to linger on longer than they should have; he thought it was all friendly interaction. Baekhyun only agreed to this because he wanted Chanyeol to finally notice his best friend, but it only backfired in the end.
This may possibly be the worst decision he’s ever made in his entire life.
He most likely lost two friends, both of whom were in love with one another in unrequited love. Baekhyun never felt love such as them. He only thought of them as close friends.
Baekhyun rested his forehead on the top of his knees, hugging them close to his chest. He whispered to himself, “I should have left instead.”
From: Byun Baekhyun
Okay, I’ll do it. I don’t think it’s the brightest idea, though? Especially with how Chanyeol overreacts to everything…
From: Jongin
baek, you know you’re also my best friend, right?
From: Byun Baekhyun
Yeah. What’s your point?
From: Jongin
best friends help each other, especially when it comes to this, right? come on baek
From: Byun Baekhyun
I’ll have to see if he’s okay with it, though. because if i’m going to act like your boyfriend and if you want it to be convincing…
From: Jongin
oh my god baek i love you you’re the greatest friend ever
From: Byun Baekhyun
I know I am. but seriously, i don’t think it’s a good idea but i’m only doing this because you’re my friend, Jongin.
From: Jongin
*Best friend i think you mean.
shit, Chanyeol’s coming back from the kitchen. we’re doing movie/game night tonight
From: Byun Baekhyun
Wish I could join you :( but i’ll talk to kyungsoo, now. bye!
From: Jongin
Say hi to hyung for me~
“So, what were you doing on your phone this time?” Chanyeol walked around the couch, setting down the bowl of popcorn and some drinks onto the coffee table before plopping next to his friend. Jongin shrugged, smiling.
“Nothing special.” His phone vibrated in his hands, and he quickly turned it on to find a new message.
From: Dyo Kyungsoo
Okay.
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