i could easily be way off target, but i've noticed that you sometimes get depressed after a major change. like...if there was a major build-up of something or you had enormous pressure on yourself, instead of feeling relief and relaxation once it's passed, you get depressed and upset. It's not at all strange or uncommon. I'm not a psycologist by any means, but from what i've read, it's due to pent up feelings during said build-up coming out all at once. i'd just relax as much as you can. i'm sure it'll pass. you've had a hard time for what you wanted to quickly pass for 3 years. it'll take some time getting used to. just be proud of yourself for getting through it all. it was rough....you totally deserve kudos.
i think a big part of this is the fact that I'm back in cincinnati for training already. nothing here has changed, so it feels weird to be here out of my previous context (ie: hotel vs apartment, rental car vs my car, etc). i was so excited about being in maryland that i didn't stop and think about missing my former life. now i'm here and i have this strong urge to go back into my routine and i can't. i especially miss my friends and how comfortable and easy my life was. it's just hard and weird and totally disconcerting. i do appreciate your input, though. now that i think about it, you're totally right. i just hope it passes soon because my family and Dave just don't understand.
they might understand more than you think, but find it hard to express because they're just so happy to be home, and any show of your unhappiness could be misinterpreted as a lack of wanting to be there.
but you're right...i can see you not thinking about missing cincinnati and hitting you later. but the underlying factor is that you belong in maryland. you always have. the sadness and pressure and all of that stuff will pass. just make sure to not be so rough on yourself.
:) thank you. i appreciate your opinion and i'm glad you spoke up.
last night was rough for me because it was a weird combination of the familiar and unfamiliar. i went over to a friend's house to cook dinner (we'd typically do that most weeks on tuesday or wednesday) and when it was time for me to go home, i kept thinking about going back to my apartment and going to bed. then i got out to my car and it was NOT my car (it was the rental car) and it hit me that i wasn't going home but back to the hotel. for some reason it made me really sad.
i think my efforts are better focused on importing the friends that i miss to maryland.
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sage advice that makes sense but is hard to remember sometimes
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i do appreciate your input, though. now that i think about it, you're totally right. i just hope it passes soon because my family and Dave just don't understand.
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but you're right...i can see you not thinking about missing cincinnati and hitting you later. but the underlying factor is that you belong in maryland. you always have. the sadness and pressure and all of that stuff will pass. just make sure to not be so rough on yourself.
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last night was rough for me because it was a weird combination of the familiar and unfamiliar. i went over to a friend's house to cook dinner (we'd typically do that most weeks on tuesday or wednesday) and when it was time for me to go home, i kept thinking about going back to my apartment and going to bed. then i got out to my car and it was NOT my car (it was the rental car) and it hit me that i wasn't going home but back to the hotel. for some reason it made me really sad.
i think my efforts are better focused on importing the friends that i miss to maryland.
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