Weekly Challenge 1

[sheisjoanne]

Title: without you
Pairing: Baekhyun/Tao
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Fluff, romance
Length: ~2.9k
Summary/Warnings: It doesn't take much to fall in love.
I don't have least fav members, only members I don't talk/have feelings about as much. I still love you a lot, Baek ;u;
I'm not crazy about this but I finished it. It could be way better but I was

Comments

[kfangirl4]

Awwwww, love the fluffy romance.

[sheisjoanne]

I have to say you are seriously really cute (I said it out loud while reading your comments) because I see you commenting my stuff all the time and it makes me smile. I'm glad I write things you enjoy ♥ (also, do you have twitter/tumblr?)

[anonymous]

the tension during the night scene made my toes curl and it felt a little ethereal.
very much liked this fic.

[sheisjoanne]

thank you so much. I'm glad you liked it ♥

[anonymous]

Ahh that was super cute! I really liked the build-up you had at the beginning where Zitao talks about falling in love with Baekhyun. ;w;

But be careful about using too many run-on sentences! Some parts were a bit confusing because the sentences were so long, and many of the places that you used semi-colon or hyphen could have been replaced with a period.

Also there were some places where the dialogue seemed a bit stiff, so maybe try reading it aloud to find a way to make it flow better? And the ending was sweet, but it seemed a bit rushed. ;;

But I really like all the mentions of aegyo and your characterizations of Baektao were cute. Lol at Luhan trying to help too. ^^

[sheisjoanne]

thank you so much for this comment ;u; You pointed out pretty much everything I was unhappy with and I'm glad it wasn't just me being paranoid.
I wanted to write more (and I wanted to write something better) but I was running out of time and I just wrote without thinking much about it which ended up on something that doesn't show what I can do.
You're my favourite person in this world because you talked about the bad stuff and not only the good parts and I think that's seriously important to grow as a writer. Thank you, again ♥

[anonymous]

This was very cute~

Some scenes were a bit confusing, though, since there wasn't any notice for time jumps (an extra space or a simple hyphen would be enough!), but all in all it was great!

[kfangirl4]

*blushes* thank you for the kind words! I do have twitter @Kfangirl4 and Tumblr kfangirl4