Made of Scars Chapter 7
Title: Made of Scars
Authors: xme_chanx and Shirito_Ano
Chapter: 7/10
Rating: PG-13 to NC-17
Pairing: Tora x Saga
Genre: romance, angst, true setting
Warnings: the usual.
Disclaimer: seriously, they are people, who owns people? do you own people?? slavery was outlawed, but if it wasnt...we'd have us some pretty asian boys! :D
Summary: In life we collect many cuts, some are deeper than most and can leave scars, but its not until we can rise above and move on with our lives that we are truly healed.
X-Posted: my journal, shirito_ano aliceinloveland, alicenine_yaoi, saga_x_tora
Find previous chapters here in my archive.
CH 7
I wake up alone; utterly, completely, alone. And I remember everything, to right after I said, “I love you!” loud enough to wake the dead. He’s gone. I wonder if my horrifyingly ineloquent and inebriated declaration of love scared him out of the band too. They will never forgive me if that’s the case. Great, kill two birds with one stone. Band & love, DEAD, courtesy of Saga’s big mouth.
I’m thinking about sleeping myself into oblivion when Chiko comes in. Immediately sticking his cold nose on my cheek, he alerts me that it is breakfast time. My stomach rumbles in agreement, so I sigh and get out of bed.
I’m still wearing my clothes from yesterday, I notice as I stand up. I change into a t-shirt and some shorts, and follow Chiko to the kitchen.
Walking past the couch I do a double take. That’s Tora, definitely Tora, asleep on the couch. At least he didn’t leave. I wonder if he’ll say anything. I bet not. I don’t want things to be awkward between us, so I’m sure as hell not bringing that up.
First official order of business is to get Saga some aspirin and a coke. Sneaking past Tora, I gracefully fall over a table someone moved behind the couch. I open my mouth and a shocking string of curses comes flying out. Tora’s face is suddenly looking at me from over the back of the couch. I stare up at him for a minute, feeling awkward.
“Heeeeeeeeeyy Tora-kun!” I say stupidly. “Ohayou, Saga-kun. Are you feeling alright?” He asks. “I’m just dandy, Tora-kun. I’m about to make breakfast, want anything?” I ask from the floor. Tora gets up and walks over to help me, looking at me like I am the most pathetic thing he’s ever laid eyes on. I probably am, at this point in time. He pulls me up and gives me a weird smile. “I really can’t stay for breakfast Saga-kun. I’m glad you’re ok, you had me kind of worried last night. I’ll see you at practice later,” He says in a rush. I’m left nodding dumbly. “Yeah, practice. Bye,” I say bitterly. I let Tora see himself out while I feed Chiko.
He didn’t have to be so damn nonchalant about the whole situation. I fume all morning long as I do chores around the place. After walking Chiko, it’s almost time for practice. I’m still pissed off and moody, but I have to go or Nao’ll get worried.
***
I arrive a little early to practice, and Tora is there practicing guitar riffs with Hiroto. I spot Nao and thank heaven for his presence. I greet Nao and Hiroto, but not Tora. I know it’s childish, but I don’t care. He looks kind of hurt, and I’m satisfied in an evil way. Now YOU know how it feels, you jerk.
Shou comes in, making lots of noise and sucking noisily at a Starbuck’s drink, effectively distracting me from my campaign to make Tora miserable. I sigh and start checking the tuning on my bass, glancing at Tora every now and then. I notice Shou start shooting looks at Hiroto and wonder what’s going on with them. I know Hiroto and Nao took Shou home, but have no idea what the little guitarist could have done to make Shou as irritated as he looks.
“Saga-kun, are you ok?” Tora is standing over me, looking concerned. “Of course, Tora-kun, everything’s just peachy. Why do you ask?” I fake a smile at him. He raises an eyebrow at me. “You seem upset, Saga-kun. I was just wondering if everything was alright,” Tora says. “Now you’re worried about what’s wrong,” I mumble. “I can’t hear you, Saga-kun.” Tora smiles gently. “I said nothing’s wrong. I sure hope I didn’t trouble you too much since you did come all the way over here to check on me,” I say in a sickly sweet voice, batting my eyelashes at him. I hate him and love him right now. He looks confused, then walks away with a nod. ‘Tora! Come back! Don’t be mad at me, I’m sorry!’ I want to yell, but don’t. Right now I want him to be just as miserable as I am.
Nao makes us practice old songs, then we start working on the new stuff. Shou sits on the couch and pulls out his PSP while Tora and Hiroto work on guitar parts while Nao and I practice together. After about half an hour, Nao switches Tora and Shou.
“Shou-kun, you and Hiroppon go over that part while I work with Saga on the rhythm.” Nao commands. I nod, but Shou makes a horrible screeching sound.
“I AM NOT working with him. I don’t like him.” Shou says petulantly, pointing accusingly at Hiroto. “But Shou-kuuuuuuun, I said I was sorry!” Hiroto whines. Tora and I gawk at them until Nao gathers his wits enough to tell Shou off. “Shou-kun, do it anyway. And apologize!” Nao sighs, rubbing his hands over his face. He gives me a ‘Help me or shoot me’ look. I mouth ‘Starbucks’ at Nao and he nods fervently.
“We’re going to go work on our stuff, jyaane!” I call as I shove Nao along and rush out the door.
As soon as I feel we’re a safe distance from the studio, I groan loudly. Nao quirks an eyebrow at me. “What’s wrong with you, you’ve seemed off all day long. And now Shou is being weird. Tora-san is the only normal one today,” Nao sighs. I huff at that.
“Tora-kun is an assjacket.” I mumble, loud enough for Nao to hear. “Assjacket? Saga-kun, really?” Nao shakes his head while I nod. “After you guys left, I kind of, well, I… confessedmyloveforhimandgotrejected,” I say quickly.
“What? At normal tempo, please, Saga-kun” Nao says. I sigh and start my woeful tale.
“Well, I want a relationship with him! I told him that he wasn’t easy to love, and that I loved him, which was stupid in retrospect. Apparently he slept on my couch all night because he was worried, then left my place like a bat out of hell as soon as I was awake. He didn’t even say anything about it. Then he even declined breakfast!” I sigh dejectedly and look at Nao, who has a stupid-looking grin on his face. Nao opens the door to Starbucks and continues to grin at me until after we’ve ordered drinks and are sitting down with them.
“Nani?” I demand. Nao shakes his head. “Nothing, we, well, Shou and I figured you guys had some kind of thing. Honestly I’m surprised you didn’t tell me earlier, Saga-kun,” he finishes. “So everyone knows.” I state.
“I don’t think Hiroppon knows, but interestingly enough, I know he did try to get into our dear singer’s pants last night. That’s why Shou-kun is so pissy today. Pon thought he was a lot more incapacitated then he actually was. Shou kicked him out of his apartment and then called me and divulged all sorts of information that would surely thrill the fangirls. I won’t trouble you with the details, Saga-kun.” Nao rolls his eyes and takes a big sip of his frappachino.
“Hiroppon tried to force himself on Shou?” I ask incredulously. Nao shakes his head. “No, nothing like that! Hiroto-kun kissed Shou a few times before suggesting they head to the bedroom. Shou kicked him out after that lovely little suggestion. I can’t say I blame him,” Nao says thoughtfully. I frown. “Well, Hiroto was sober, he shouldn’t have done that.” I say.
“Maybe that’s why Tora didn’t do anything?” Nao says in a placating sort of way. “But he didn’t even mention it later, he just ignored the fact that it happened. Tora-kun left me awkward and heartbroken!” I say dramatically. Nao giggles, before suggesting that we get back to the studio. I glare at him for laughing at me, but follow him back none the less.
***
The studio is even more tense then it was when we left it. Tora is sitting on the couch, watching helplessly as Hiroto and Shou argue.
“GUYS! Cut it out. You can figure your private lives out later, work first.” Nao snaps at them. They both look ashamed before apologizing.
“That was awkward!” Tora tells me, as I sit down on the couch. “Looks like it,” I nod. The conversation dies.
“Okay, we’re running the set list again. Let’s go ahead and work in stage positions.” Nao commands. We nod, and take our positions. We make it through the first song alright, but Nao’s words earlier keep running through my head. Maybe Tora does care? But what if he doesn’t? I get more and more confused, alerting everyone else to my worries when I miss an entire section of bass lines.
“Saga-kun, are you ok?” Tora asks quietly. I nod. “Yeah, fine,” I say hollowly.
“You don’t seem fine, and you’re throwing everyone else off too.” Shou snaps at me. I glare at him before dumping my bass on its stand and walking out. I hear Nao shout something but I don’t care right now. I just want to go home to my dog and sleep.
Authors: xme_chanx and Shirito_Ano
Chapter: 7/10
Rating: PG-13 to NC-17
Pairing: Tora x Saga
Genre: romance, angst, true setting
Warnings: the usual.
Disclaimer: seriously, they are people, who owns people? do you own people?? slavery was outlawed, but if it wasnt...we'd have us some pretty asian boys! :D
Summary: In life we collect many cuts, some are deeper than most and can leave scars, but its not until we can rise above and move on with our lives that we are truly healed.
X-Posted: my journal, shirito_ano aliceinloveland, alicenine_yaoi, saga_x_tora
Find previous chapters here in my archive.
CH 7
I wake up alone; utterly, completely, alone. And I remember everything, to right after I said, “I love you!” loud enough to wake the dead. He’s gone. I wonder if my horrifyingly ineloquent and inebriated declaration of love scared him out of the band too. They will never forgive me if that’s the case. Great, kill two birds with one stone. Band & love, DEAD, courtesy of Saga’s big mouth.
I’m thinking about sleeping myself into oblivion when Chiko comes in. Immediately sticking his cold nose on my cheek, he alerts me that it is breakfast time. My stomach rumbles in agreement, so I sigh and get out of bed.
I’m still wearing my clothes from yesterday, I notice as I stand up. I change into a t-shirt and some shorts, and follow Chiko to the kitchen.
Walking past the couch I do a double take. That’s Tora, definitely Tora, asleep on the couch. At least he didn’t leave. I wonder if he’ll say anything. I bet not. I don’t want things to be awkward between us, so I’m sure as hell not bringing that up.
First official order of business is to get Saga some aspirin and a coke. Sneaking past Tora, I gracefully fall over a table someone moved behind the couch. I open my mouth and a shocking string of curses comes flying out. Tora’s face is suddenly looking at me from over the back of the couch. I stare up at him for a minute, feeling awkward.
“Heeeeeeeeeyy Tora-kun!” I say stupidly. “Ohayou, Saga-kun. Are you feeling alright?” He asks. “I’m just dandy, Tora-kun. I’m about to make breakfast, want anything?” I ask from the floor. Tora gets up and walks over to help me, looking at me like I am the most pathetic thing he’s ever laid eyes on. I probably am, at this point in time. He pulls me up and gives me a weird smile. “I really can’t stay for breakfast Saga-kun. I’m glad you’re ok, you had me kind of worried last night. I’ll see you at practice later,” He says in a rush. I’m left nodding dumbly. “Yeah, practice. Bye,” I say bitterly. I let Tora see himself out while I feed Chiko.
He didn’t have to be so damn nonchalant about the whole situation. I fume all morning long as I do chores around the place. After walking Chiko, it’s almost time for practice. I’m still pissed off and moody, but I have to go or Nao’ll get worried.
***
I arrive a little early to practice, and Tora is there practicing guitar riffs with Hiroto. I spot Nao and thank heaven for his presence. I greet Nao and Hiroto, but not Tora. I know it’s childish, but I don’t care. He looks kind of hurt, and I’m satisfied in an evil way. Now YOU know how it feels, you jerk.
Shou comes in, making lots of noise and sucking noisily at a Starbuck’s drink, effectively distracting me from my campaign to make Tora miserable. I sigh and start checking the tuning on my bass, glancing at Tora every now and then. I notice Shou start shooting looks at Hiroto and wonder what’s going on with them. I know Hiroto and Nao took Shou home, but have no idea what the little guitarist could have done to make Shou as irritated as he looks.
“Saga-kun, are you ok?” Tora is standing over me, looking concerned. “Of course, Tora-kun, everything’s just peachy. Why do you ask?” I fake a smile at him. He raises an eyebrow at me. “You seem upset, Saga-kun. I was just wondering if everything was alright,” Tora says. “Now you’re worried about what’s wrong,” I mumble. “I can’t hear you, Saga-kun.” Tora smiles gently. “I said nothing’s wrong. I sure hope I didn’t trouble you too much since you did come all the way over here to check on me,” I say in a sickly sweet voice, batting my eyelashes at him. I hate him and love him right now. He looks confused, then walks away with a nod. ‘Tora! Come back! Don’t be mad at me, I’m sorry!’ I want to yell, but don’t. Right now I want him to be just as miserable as I am.
Nao makes us practice old songs, then we start working on the new stuff. Shou sits on the couch and pulls out his PSP while Tora and Hiroto work on guitar parts while Nao and I practice together. After about half an hour, Nao switches Tora and Shou.
“Shou-kun, you and Hiroppon go over that part while I work with Saga on the rhythm.” Nao commands. I nod, but Shou makes a horrible screeching sound.
“I AM NOT working with him. I don’t like him.” Shou says petulantly, pointing accusingly at Hiroto. “But Shou-kuuuuuuun, I said I was sorry!” Hiroto whines. Tora and I gawk at them until Nao gathers his wits enough to tell Shou off. “Shou-kun, do it anyway. And apologize!” Nao sighs, rubbing his hands over his face. He gives me a ‘Help me or shoot me’ look. I mouth ‘Starbucks’ at Nao and he nods fervently.
“We’re going to go work on our stuff, jyaane!” I call as I shove Nao along and rush out the door.
As soon as I feel we’re a safe distance from the studio, I groan loudly. Nao quirks an eyebrow at me. “What’s wrong with you, you’ve seemed off all day long. And now Shou is being weird. Tora-san is the only normal one today,” Nao sighs. I huff at that.
“Tora-kun is an assjacket.” I mumble, loud enough for Nao to hear. “Assjacket? Saga-kun, really?” Nao shakes his head while I nod. “After you guys left, I kind of, well, I… confessedmyloveforhimandgotrejected,” I say quickly.
“What? At normal tempo, please, Saga-kun” Nao says. I sigh and start my woeful tale.
“Well, I want a relationship with him! I told him that he wasn’t easy to love, and that I loved him, which was stupid in retrospect. Apparently he slept on my couch all night because he was worried, then left my place like a bat out of hell as soon as I was awake. He didn’t even say anything about it. Then he even declined breakfast!” I sigh dejectedly and look at Nao, who has a stupid-looking grin on his face. Nao opens the door to Starbucks and continues to grin at me until after we’ve ordered drinks and are sitting down with them.
“Nani?” I demand. Nao shakes his head. “Nothing, we, well, Shou and I figured you guys had some kind of thing. Honestly I’m surprised you didn’t tell me earlier, Saga-kun,” he finishes. “So everyone knows.” I state.
“I don’t think Hiroppon knows, but interestingly enough, I know he did try to get into our dear singer’s pants last night. That’s why Shou-kun is so pissy today. Pon thought he was a lot more incapacitated then he actually was. Shou kicked him out of his apartment and then called me and divulged all sorts of information that would surely thrill the fangirls. I won’t trouble you with the details, Saga-kun.” Nao rolls his eyes and takes a big sip of his frappachino.
“Hiroppon tried to force himself on Shou?” I ask incredulously. Nao shakes his head. “No, nothing like that! Hiroto-kun kissed Shou a few times before suggesting they head to the bedroom. Shou kicked him out after that lovely little suggestion. I can’t say I blame him,” Nao says thoughtfully. I frown. “Well, Hiroto was sober, he shouldn’t have done that.” I say.
“Maybe that’s why Tora didn’t do anything?” Nao says in a placating sort of way. “But he didn’t even mention it later, he just ignored the fact that it happened. Tora-kun left me awkward and heartbroken!” I say dramatically. Nao giggles, before suggesting that we get back to the studio. I glare at him for laughing at me, but follow him back none the less.
***
The studio is even more tense then it was when we left it. Tora is sitting on the couch, watching helplessly as Hiroto and Shou argue.
“GUYS! Cut it out. You can figure your private lives out later, work first.” Nao snaps at them. They both look ashamed before apologizing.
“That was awkward!” Tora tells me, as I sit down on the couch. “Looks like it,” I nod. The conversation dies.
“Okay, we’re running the set list again. Let’s go ahead and work in stage positions.” Nao commands. We nod, and take our positions. We make it through the first song alright, but Nao’s words earlier keep running through my head. Maybe Tora does care? But what if he doesn’t? I get more and more confused, alerting everyone else to my worries when I miss an entire section of bass lines.
“Saga-kun, are you ok?” Tora asks quietly. I nod. “Yeah, fine,” I say hollowly.
“You don’t seem fine, and you’re throwing everyone else off too.” Shou snaps at me. I glare at him before dumping my bass on its stand and walking out. I hear Nao shout something but I don’t care right now. I just want to go home to my dog and sleep.