Forever [Axel/Roxas, PG-13]
Title: Forever
Pairing: Axel/Roxas (or Roxas/Axel, if you like.)
Written For: 20songs20hearts (when I finish working on it) Prompt: Forever by Vertical Horizon
Type: flangst
Rating: PG-13 for language
A/N: A really, really different take on the AkuRoku relationship that I would never have conceived if it weren't for that stupid song. Please note I don't think this is how it went at all... but uh. Yeah.
Take these roses off of me, let me live, let me be...
For a little while.
Let my eyes see everything and nothing in their time
I do not mind.
"That's impossible."
"Nothing's impossible, Rox!" Axel waved his ice cream expansively.
"You don't have a heart. It's impossible for you to love me." Roxas licked his own ice cream slowly; he wasn't impatient like his fiery friend. "Attraction, maybe. But that's nothing new..."
He shook his head vigorously. "Don't you ever listen to Demyx? What's heartless about us?! And that's not true, I'm not just attracted to you, although that's definitely part of it..."
Roxas was looking out at the horizon of Twilight Town, but most of his focus was on the ice cream, not really what Axel was saying. Axel said a lot of things, most of them totally ridiculous.
"Roxas. I'm jealous of any time you spend with other people. I care about you. I want the best from you... and the best of you, and FUCK I just..." He hated himself, hated having to be so fucking open about this, wasn't it obvious?! Or was Roxas just that oblivious? "Can't you understand?"
Roxas thought quietly for a minute, a minute that seemed to last forever. "...No," he finally said. "I can't. I'd have sex with you if that would make it better, but I just... don't really care." He shrugged. "You don't irritate me most of the time, and I guess I owe you for that, so I'd be anything you wanted for a while. I'd even pretend to love you, if you wanted." He turned to look at Axel then, who was staring at him, jaw hanging open. "But something tells me that would piss you off more."
"Heck yes it would!" Axel let his head fall into his hands and groaned. "Jeez, Roxas, way to let me down, with the fucking temptation of a lifetime!"
"If you're tempted, why not just give in?" Roxas shrugged, leaned back against the clock tower. He reached up and toyed with the zipper on his coat. "I said I don't care if you do."
"That's..." Axel stared at his hand for a minute, then chuckled softly and shook his head. "You really don't get it, do you?"
"...Not really." He looked down, away, vaguely aware that he'd made Axel even more upset, and it sort of discontented him, a bit. "I sort of wish I could understand."
"Sort of?" Axel leaned forward, dangling his popsicle stick over the train common.
"I don't really like being left out of the loop." Roxas shrugged again. "It makes it hard to relate to you."
"And you want to?" Axel pressed, leaning closer to Roxas.
"I don't know if 'want' is the right word." Roxas looked up, then thoughtfully sucked on the end of his ice cream. "It just seems like it would be easier if I knew what you were talking about... it's kind of confusing."
"Don't you remember how it - " Oh. He stopped. That's right... Roxas couldn't remember. He never knew what it was like to love at all. Axel shook his head. "Man, you're a piece of work, Rox."
"What's that mean?" Roxas quietly took Axel's popsicle stick from him, ignoring the charred bits on the end where his fingers had touched it, and poked them idly together.
"It means I probably wouldn't love you if you were any different... even if you had a heart." He winced. "Well, that's probably a lie."
"You liar..." Roxas grinned.
"HEY. I think I should get a fucking MEDAL for telling the truth, here!"
"What?" The blond Nobody stuck his tongue out and winked. "Because you said you loved me? That just makes you silly."
"Silly, my ass!"
"You're definitely silly... thinking you love me..."
"I do!"
"Silly..."
Who'd've guessed I'd ever learn
To let the walls around me burn, and light up the hillside.
My words,
I ate them for so long and nothing changed, it was just the same.
"Simply amazing, Roxas."
"Axel." Roxas leveled a glare at him.
"So you do remember." Axel stopped, and returned the glare with a passion and intensity that should have been illegal. "BUT YOU'RE TOO LATE!"
Roxas drew his Keyblades. He did remember, and he remembered how it was to dual-wield - because there was equal amounts of light and darkness in him.
"Two?!" Axel hissed, sounding surprised.
They fought. It was almost better than sex.
"Are you upset that I left?"
"Of course I'm fucking upset! And I'm upset that you have a new best friend, but of course he doesn't love you so maybe that's better!"
Roxas knocked Axel to the ground, then slammed down on top of him. "I never said it was a bad thing."
"You fucking ran away! You said no one would miss you, you little retard!"
He blocked a few swipes of the chakrams. "That had nothing to do with it. And I thought, if I said that, you wouldn't come after me. And it worked."
Axel cut across his chest, ripping Roxas's shirt open. "Disappointed?"
"Not really." Roxas took a few swipes of his own, but the leather coat was too strong to tear. "Why are you fighting me?"
"Well, I told you. You won't come back with me, so I've got orders to kill you. After that, I'll probably just kill myself, because life really won't be worth living."
SLAM. Roxas pinned him to the ground again, in an attack that pretty much destroyed the little strength Axel had left. "Don't ever let me hear you say that again."
"But it's true." He held a hand to the ground, and opened up a portal behind him. "Or, it would be, if I wasn't such a fucking coward."
"Don't just leave!" Roxas grabbed onto his shoulders.
"You did." Axel began to fade backwards into the portal. He pushed Roxas's hands away, then smiled sadly. "We'll meet again... in the next life."
"Yeah..." Roxas's voice was distant, but his eyes were sharp, as if trying to memorize every inch of Axel's face. "...I'll be waiting."
"Silly..." Axel smirked. "Just because you have a next life..."
And I don't know if you see me here,
But I can tell you your face is clear.
I will see you...
Roxas beat on the walls of his own retarded brain, and willed himself to remember. REMEMBER ME! he screamed silently. Remember me... remember HIM.
But Sora smiled and summoned the Keyblade, and Roxas felt a twinge of regret - almost possesiveness, until he remembered that it was still his Keyblade, it was the hands that were no longer his.
His hands wouldn't do this. Not to Demyx. Not without good reason.
There was no reason in Sora's consciousness.
Remember me! he tried again, but to no avail. Maybe he was the intelligence that Sora had never used, the power that Sora had never unlocked, the hate that Sora had never fathomed. Because whatever it was, Sora was ignoring it.
And Roxas felt the remorse that Sora couldn't, because he didn't remember. Oh yes. They shared a heart that cried when they left his friends in Twilight Town... so why didn't he cry when Demyx faded away into nothingness?
Don't block me out, Sora, Roxas thought desperately. I may not have a right to exist, but I do. And I'm here.
Please remember me, Sora.
Please remember what he said to me, before it's too late.
Forever
Forever
I will see you forever.
"Don't stop moving, or the darkness will overtake you."
Roxas felt a sudden leap in his - Sora's? - heart. Axel! he thought ecstatically. It's Axel! But Sora had stopped hearing him long ago.
"Get goin'!"
"Why?"
"Don't ask, just do it!"
Roxas thought Sora would actually listen to him for a second, but of course, he was far too heroic for that. That's right, don't listen to him!
"You okay?!" It might have been Roxas talking, except any idiot could hear that Sora was genuinely worried. Maybe it really was Roxas.
"I kidnapped Kairi, but she got away from me."
No one cares! Roxas thought frantically. Just tell me you're okay!
"After that, Saix caught her. He's a member of Organization XIII. Saix. Got it memorized?"
Bad news. Of course I've got it memorized, I know all about Saix! But of course, Sora couldn't remember.
"Now go save her!"
NO! Roxas screamed, his heart pounding. He stood up, sensing the enemy behind him - once smack of the Keyblade, and he was gone. "Leave us alone!" He wasn't sure if he was talking to the Nobodies, or Kairi, or even Sora - he just wanted to talk to Axel, damnit!
They fought. Roxas fought. Sora fought. He wasn't sure they were so different anymore.
"I think I liked it better when they were on my side."
I didn't. "Feeling a little... regret?" Why did it come out like that? Stupid Sora. Roxas frowned, the voice was all wrong. Sarcasm and snarkiness didn't sound right from Sora's mouth, it just sounded mean.
"Nah... I can handle these punks. Heh. Watch this!"
Or maybe he did hear... Roxas looked around. Where'd that giant flaming idiot go?
"Woah!" Okay, that was Sora. Retard. Roxas turned around - there he was... FUCKING SHIT! He ran over. "You're... fading away..."
"Well, that's what happens when you put your whole being into an attack." Axel looked over. "You know what I mean?"
Roxas remembered. He did know.
"Not that... Nobodies actually HAVE beings, right?"
Roxas opened his mouth to say something, but Axel cut him off. "Anyway, I digress. Go. Find Kairi."
Hells no!
"Oh. Almost forgot... Sorry for what I did to her."
Did you rape her?? Roxas thought, totally confused. Because then I'd be upset, but not for the reasons you'd think. "When we find her, you can tell her that yourself."
Find her? Who said anything about finding Kairi? Roxas wasn't gonna leave Axel, no fucking way!
"Think I'll pass." Axel looked away. "My heart just wouldn't be in it, you know?"
I love you too you fucking douchebag! Roxas screamed, but Sora wasn't having any of that. All he could think about was Kairi... well FUCK Kairi, Axel was...
"Haven't got one. Heh..."
Axel was dying.
Even only in the back of Sora's mind, Roxas froze. Did I say that? did I say you didn't have a heart? But I just couldn't understand you...
"Axel? What were you trying to do?" I understand now. Roxas wanted to know the answer to the question almost as much as Sora did, even if part of him already knew the answer... but his silly little heart, beating so unfamiliarly in his chest, wanted to hear it. Still doubted. Still hoped.
"I wanted to see Roxas."
Sora was surprised, but Roxas only smiled.
"He... was the only one I liked..."
I can hear you, you know, he thought. You can say loved. It's okay. Sora will understand...
"He made me feel... like I had a heart."
...that part of him loves you.
"It's kind of... funny."
I do love you, Axel.
"You make me feel... the same..."
Oh gee, ya think? Roxas rolled his eyes, but he was sure that Sora didn't. That's right, this was all news to him. He opened his mouth to say something, but -
"Kairi's in the castle dungeon. Now go!"
Fuck that, Roxas snarled. You're fucking... dying and you expect me just to...
The portal opened, but Roxas... Sora? didn't move, crouched over Axel as the edges of his body began to flake away into darkness.
"Axel..."
Because, of course, it was one heart that loved him. Sora's. Roxas's.
Forever.
Send me letters from above
Send me strength, send me love, such sweet love
Sing me songs, that echo in my head and in my heart
That's where you are.
And I don't know if you feel me here...
But I can tell you one thing is clear
i w i l l f e e l y o u . . .
"Finally woken up?"
Roxas looked up, quickly. "Axel?" What was he doing here? He was still inside Sora's head, surely.
"Nope. Maybe you're going to sleep... Soon I won't even be able to talk to your consciousness like this."
No. They were somewhere else. Did it really matter? They were together, right? "I... things are different, now." Why was it so difficult to speak about the things that mattered? Roxas felt his heart clench, and his hands shake, and he wondered if Axel felt the same way, waiting for the right time to say it.
But he hadn't, had he? He'd just blabbed it out one day, out of the blue. Hey Roxas - I love you.
Just like that.
"I've thought about it a lot. Namine said the same thing."
Oh... right... Namine.
"Roxas... you have a hearts, don't you?"
"...Yes. I do now."
"While Namine and I... we don't really have hearts, do we?"
Roxas thought about this. Once upon a time, he'd have agreed with Axel... but he wasn't so sure now. "I... I don't know either." Maybe I just want you to have a heart to love me with.
"...I guess not." Words unspoken flowed between them, and was it just Roxas or did it suddenly feel more important? And different...
"But, the heart's not something you can see," he said suddenly. "I've started wondering whether it's something you can't feel, either..." He swallowed. "If so, then..."
"Then what?"
"...then we'd never know, right?"
Axel leaned forward. "Does it really matter?"
Roxas chuckled. "I guess not. I think... you do what you want to do, no matter whether you have a heart or not..." He shook his head. "And Sora..."
Axel laughed at that. "You really are the same."
"That's not true..." Roxas looked up, then took the offered ice cream. "He doesn't..."
"What?"
"Ah." Roxas ducked his head. "Nothing." Was it such a difficult thing to admit? But he had his pride.
"Heh, this really takes me back... D'you remember? We met the day you got your new name." Axel's voice was teasing, yet soft, and Roxas wondered why he never noticed the little things like that before. "And then we watched the sun set, from up here."
"Yeah. This is where I came from." Roxas smiled. "Everyone... Hayner, Pence, Olette... I hope they're okay."
Axel glanced sideways at him. "What, caring about someone for a change?"
"I have a heart, you know."
"Oh..." He looked away quickly. "Right... well, you should go see them again. Looking for your answer."
"Yeah." Roxas looked away, too, out over the town. "I have to go... Sora's waiting for me." He swallowed.
"Yeah... I guess he is." Axel turned away again, and Roxas felt his heart break at the sadness in his voice. "Whoa, this ice cream really is salty!" Empty words to cover up the emotions they were so unused to showing...
Roxas didn't move, even though he could feel the ground as Sora ran through the halls of the World that Never Was... and his vision was blurring, he could almost see both places if he wanted to.
But he'd never stop seeing Axel. Not if Sora lived a hundred years, and saw a hundred worlds. His voice caught in his throat, and choked on all the things his heart was too scared to say. "...See you, Axel." I will see you forever.
"See you... beloved."
The word echoed in Roxas's ears, and he knew that he would never stop hearing it. I will hear you forever.
The tear dropped to the flagstones, and who was it that was leaving, anyway?
I will feel you...
Forever
Forever
I will feel you
Forever
Forever
and I will hear you
Forever
Forever
and I will see you
Forever
Take these roses off of me...
Let me live, let me be.
Pairing: Axel/Roxas (or Roxas/Axel, if you like.)
Written For: 20songs20hearts (when I finish working on it) Prompt: Forever by Vertical Horizon
Type: flangst
Rating: PG-13 for language
A/N: A really, really different take on the AkuRoku relationship that I would never have conceived if it weren't for that stupid song. Please note I don't think this is how it went at all... but uh. Yeah.
Take these roses off of me, let me live, let me be...
For a little while.
Let my eyes see everything and nothing in their time
I do not mind.
"That's impossible."
"Nothing's impossible, Rox!" Axel waved his ice cream expansively.
"You don't have a heart. It's impossible for you to love me." Roxas licked his own ice cream slowly; he wasn't impatient like his fiery friend. "Attraction, maybe. But that's nothing new..."
He shook his head vigorously. "Don't you ever listen to Demyx? What's heartless about us?! And that's not true, I'm not just attracted to you, although that's definitely part of it..."
Roxas was looking out at the horizon of Twilight Town, but most of his focus was on the ice cream, not really what Axel was saying. Axel said a lot of things, most of them totally ridiculous.
"Roxas. I'm jealous of any time you spend with other people. I care about you. I want the best from you... and the best of you, and FUCK I just..." He hated himself, hated having to be so fucking open about this, wasn't it obvious?! Or was Roxas just that oblivious? "Can't you understand?"
Roxas thought quietly for a minute, a minute that seemed to last forever. "...No," he finally said. "I can't. I'd have sex with you if that would make it better, but I just... don't really care." He shrugged. "You don't irritate me most of the time, and I guess I owe you for that, so I'd be anything you wanted for a while. I'd even pretend to love you, if you wanted." He turned to look at Axel then, who was staring at him, jaw hanging open. "But something tells me that would piss you off more."
"Heck yes it would!" Axel let his head fall into his hands and groaned. "Jeez, Roxas, way to let me down, with the fucking temptation of a lifetime!"
"If you're tempted, why not just give in?" Roxas shrugged, leaned back against the clock tower. He reached up and toyed with the zipper on his coat. "I said I don't care if you do."
"That's..." Axel stared at his hand for a minute, then chuckled softly and shook his head. "You really don't get it, do you?"
"...Not really." He looked down, away, vaguely aware that he'd made Axel even more upset, and it sort of discontented him, a bit. "I sort of wish I could understand."
"Sort of?" Axel leaned forward, dangling his popsicle stick over the train common.
"I don't really like being left out of the loop." Roxas shrugged again. "It makes it hard to relate to you."
"And you want to?" Axel pressed, leaning closer to Roxas.
"I don't know if 'want' is the right word." Roxas looked up, then thoughtfully sucked on the end of his ice cream. "It just seems like it would be easier if I knew what you were talking about... it's kind of confusing."
"Don't you remember how it - " Oh. He stopped. That's right... Roxas couldn't remember. He never knew what it was like to love at all. Axel shook his head. "Man, you're a piece of work, Rox."
"What's that mean?" Roxas quietly took Axel's popsicle stick from him, ignoring the charred bits on the end where his fingers had touched it, and poked them idly together.
"It means I probably wouldn't love you if you were any different... even if you had a heart." He winced. "Well, that's probably a lie."
"You liar..." Roxas grinned.
"HEY. I think I should get a fucking MEDAL for telling the truth, here!"
"What?" The blond Nobody stuck his tongue out and winked. "Because you said you loved me? That just makes you silly."
"Silly, my ass!"
"You're definitely silly... thinking you love me..."
"I do!"
"Silly..."
Who'd've guessed I'd ever learn
To let the walls around me burn, and light up the hillside.
My words,
I ate them for so long and nothing changed, it was just the same.
"Simply amazing, Roxas."
"Axel." Roxas leveled a glare at him.
"So you do remember." Axel stopped, and returned the glare with a passion and intensity that should have been illegal. "BUT YOU'RE TOO LATE!"
Roxas drew his Keyblades. He did remember, and he remembered how it was to dual-wield - because there was equal amounts of light and darkness in him.
"Two?!" Axel hissed, sounding surprised.
They fought. It was almost better than sex.
"Are you upset that I left?"
"Of course I'm fucking upset! And I'm upset that you have a new best friend, but of course he doesn't love you so maybe that's better!"
Roxas knocked Axel to the ground, then slammed down on top of him. "I never said it was a bad thing."
"You fucking ran away! You said no one would miss you, you little retard!"
He blocked a few swipes of the chakrams. "That had nothing to do with it. And I thought, if I said that, you wouldn't come after me. And it worked."
Axel cut across his chest, ripping Roxas's shirt open. "Disappointed?"
"Not really." Roxas took a few swipes of his own, but the leather coat was too strong to tear. "Why are you fighting me?"
"Well, I told you. You won't come back with me, so I've got orders to kill you. After that, I'll probably just kill myself, because life really won't be worth living."
SLAM. Roxas pinned him to the ground again, in an attack that pretty much destroyed the little strength Axel had left. "Don't ever let me hear you say that again."
"But it's true." He held a hand to the ground, and opened up a portal behind him. "Or, it would be, if I wasn't such a fucking coward."
"Don't just leave!" Roxas grabbed onto his shoulders.
"You did." Axel began to fade backwards into the portal. He pushed Roxas's hands away, then smiled sadly. "We'll meet again... in the next life."
"Yeah..." Roxas's voice was distant, but his eyes were sharp, as if trying to memorize every inch of Axel's face. "...I'll be waiting."
"Silly..." Axel smirked. "Just because you have a next life..."
And I don't know if you see me here,
But I can tell you your face is clear.
I will see you...
Roxas beat on the walls of his own retarded brain, and willed himself to remember. REMEMBER ME! he screamed silently. Remember me... remember HIM.
But Sora smiled and summoned the Keyblade, and Roxas felt a twinge of regret - almost possesiveness, until he remembered that it was still his Keyblade, it was the hands that were no longer his.
His hands wouldn't do this. Not to Demyx. Not without good reason.
There was no reason in Sora's consciousness.
Remember me! he tried again, but to no avail. Maybe he was the intelligence that Sora had never used, the power that Sora had never unlocked, the hate that Sora had never fathomed. Because whatever it was, Sora was ignoring it.
And Roxas felt the remorse that Sora couldn't, because he didn't remember. Oh yes. They shared a heart that cried when they left his friends in Twilight Town... so why didn't he cry when Demyx faded away into nothingness?
Don't block me out, Sora, Roxas thought desperately. I may not have a right to exist, but I do. And I'm here.
Please remember me, Sora.
Please remember what he said to me, before it's too late.
Forever
Forever
I will see you forever.
"Don't stop moving, or the darkness will overtake you."
Roxas felt a sudden leap in his - Sora's? - heart. Axel! he thought ecstatically. It's Axel! But Sora had stopped hearing him long ago.
"Get goin'!"
"Why?"
"Don't ask, just do it!"
Roxas thought Sora would actually listen to him for a second, but of course, he was far too heroic for that. That's right, don't listen to him!
"You okay?!" It might have been Roxas talking, except any idiot could hear that Sora was genuinely worried. Maybe it really was Roxas.
"I kidnapped Kairi, but she got away from me."
No one cares! Roxas thought frantically. Just tell me you're okay!
"After that, Saix caught her. He's a member of Organization XIII. Saix. Got it memorized?"
Bad news. Of course I've got it memorized, I know all about Saix! But of course, Sora couldn't remember.
"Now go save her!"
NO! Roxas screamed, his heart pounding. He stood up, sensing the enemy behind him - once smack of the Keyblade, and he was gone. "Leave us alone!" He wasn't sure if he was talking to the Nobodies, or Kairi, or even Sora - he just wanted to talk to Axel, damnit!
They fought. Roxas fought. Sora fought. He wasn't sure they were so different anymore.
"I think I liked it better when they were on my side."
I didn't. "Feeling a little... regret?" Why did it come out like that? Stupid Sora. Roxas frowned, the voice was all wrong. Sarcasm and snarkiness didn't sound right from Sora's mouth, it just sounded mean.
"Nah... I can handle these punks. Heh. Watch this!"
Or maybe he did hear... Roxas looked around. Where'd that giant flaming idiot go?
"Woah!" Okay, that was Sora. Retard. Roxas turned around - there he was... FUCKING SHIT! He ran over. "You're... fading away..."
"Well, that's what happens when you put your whole being into an attack." Axel looked over. "You know what I mean?"
Roxas remembered. He did know.
"Not that... Nobodies actually HAVE beings, right?"
Roxas opened his mouth to say something, but Axel cut him off. "Anyway, I digress. Go. Find Kairi."
Hells no!
"Oh. Almost forgot... Sorry for what I did to her."
Did you rape her?? Roxas thought, totally confused. Because then I'd be upset, but not for the reasons you'd think. "When we find her, you can tell her that yourself."
Find her? Who said anything about finding Kairi? Roxas wasn't gonna leave Axel, no fucking way!
"Think I'll pass." Axel looked away. "My heart just wouldn't be in it, you know?"
I love you too you fucking douchebag! Roxas screamed, but Sora wasn't having any of that. All he could think about was Kairi... well FUCK Kairi, Axel was...
"Haven't got one. Heh..."
Axel was dying.
Even only in the back of Sora's mind, Roxas froze. Did I say that? did I say you didn't have a heart? But I just couldn't understand you...
"Axel? What were you trying to do?" I understand now. Roxas wanted to know the answer to the question almost as much as Sora did, even if part of him already knew the answer... but his silly little heart, beating so unfamiliarly in his chest, wanted to hear it. Still doubted. Still hoped.
"I wanted to see Roxas."
Sora was surprised, but Roxas only smiled.
"He... was the only one I liked..."
I can hear you, you know, he thought. You can say loved. It's okay. Sora will understand...
"He made me feel... like I had a heart."
...that part of him loves you.
"It's kind of... funny."
I do love you, Axel.
"You make me feel... the same..."
Oh gee, ya think? Roxas rolled his eyes, but he was sure that Sora didn't. That's right, this was all news to him. He opened his mouth to say something, but -
"Kairi's in the castle dungeon. Now go!"
Fuck that, Roxas snarled. You're fucking... dying and you expect me just to...
The portal opened, but Roxas... Sora? didn't move, crouched over Axel as the edges of his body began to flake away into darkness.
"Axel..."
Because, of course, it was one heart that loved him. Sora's. Roxas's.
Forever.
Send me letters from above
Send me strength, send me love, such sweet love
Sing me songs, that echo in my head and in my heart
That's where you are.
And I don't know if you feel me here...
But I can tell you one thing is clear
i w i l l f e e l y o u . . .
"Finally woken up?"
Roxas looked up, quickly. "Axel?" What was he doing here? He was still inside Sora's head, surely.
"Nope. Maybe you're going to sleep... Soon I won't even be able to talk to your consciousness like this."
No. They were somewhere else. Did it really matter? They were together, right? "I... things are different, now." Why was it so difficult to speak about the things that mattered? Roxas felt his heart clench, and his hands shake, and he wondered if Axel felt the same way, waiting for the right time to say it.
But he hadn't, had he? He'd just blabbed it out one day, out of the blue. Hey Roxas - I love you.
Just like that.
"I've thought about it a lot. Namine said the same thing."
Oh... right... Namine.
"Roxas... you have a hearts, don't you?"
"...Yes. I do now."
"While Namine and I... we don't really have hearts, do we?"
Roxas thought about this. Once upon a time, he'd have agreed with Axel... but he wasn't so sure now. "I... I don't know either." Maybe I just want you to have a heart to love me with.
"...I guess not." Words unspoken flowed between them, and was it just Roxas or did it suddenly feel more important? And different...
"But, the heart's not something you can see," he said suddenly. "I've started wondering whether it's something you can't feel, either..." He swallowed. "If so, then..."
"Then what?"
"...then we'd never know, right?"
Axel leaned forward. "Does it really matter?"
Roxas chuckled. "I guess not. I think... you do what you want to do, no matter whether you have a heart or not..." He shook his head. "And Sora..."
Axel laughed at that. "You really are the same."
"That's not true..." Roxas looked up, then took the offered ice cream. "He doesn't..."
"What?"
"Ah." Roxas ducked his head. "Nothing." Was it such a difficult thing to admit? But he had his pride.
"Heh, this really takes me back... D'you remember? We met the day you got your new name." Axel's voice was teasing, yet soft, and Roxas wondered why he never noticed the little things like that before. "And then we watched the sun set, from up here."
"Yeah. This is where I came from." Roxas smiled. "Everyone... Hayner, Pence, Olette... I hope they're okay."
Axel glanced sideways at him. "What, caring about someone for a change?"
"I have a heart, you know."
"Oh..." He looked away quickly. "Right... well, you should go see them again. Looking for your answer."
"Yeah." Roxas looked away, too, out over the town. "I have to go... Sora's waiting for me." He swallowed.
"Yeah... I guess he is." Axel turned away again, and Roxas felt his heart break at the sadness in his voice. "Whoa, this ice cream really is salty!" Empty words to cover up the emotions they were so unused to showing...
Roxas didn't move, even though he could feel the ground as Sora ran through the halls of the World that Never Was... and his vision was blurring, he could almost see both places if he wanted to.
But he'd never stop seeing Axel. Not if Sora lived a hundred years, and saw a hundred worlds. His voice caught in his throat, and choked on all the things his heart was too scared to say. "...See you, Axel." I will see you forever.
"See you... beloved."
The word echoed in Roxas's ears, and he knew that he would never stop hearing it. I will hear you forever.
The tear dropped to the flagstones, and who was it that was leaving, anyway?
I will feel you...
Forever
Forever
I will feel you
Forever
Forever
and I will hear you
Forever
Forever
and I will see you
Forever
Take these roses off of me...
Let me live, let me be.