Somewhere I Have Never Travelled, Gladly Beyond - Chapter 13

[wyntermute]

Back at university so as to better write essays... So of course I'm posting this. When I was reading through and editing this chapter there were about fifty billion typos -- it's likely there's still a few that escaped my notice so please point them out

Comments

[cynchick]

I liked this chapter a lot, and I think the length worked out really well. You did a good job portraying that sense of nervous excitement of that beginning stage where flirting starts to become more and you get the thrills at every little touch and extended glance. You could definitely feel the anticipation as well as the aprehension

[wyntermute]

I'm glad to hear you enjoyed the chapter! :)

Very happy to hear that the romantic parts turned out okay -- I was quite nervous about writing them. I agree that a bit more lemony / lime goodness could have been in it, especially after all the waiting we've been through, but I think that'll have to come in a later story when I have a lot more experience writing even basic kisses. :P

I've started the next chapter and it doesn't actually begin with a morning after scene... Although, yes, I certainly hope I managed to suggest that they did go all the way in that wonderful little alley! (Really, who wouldn't in that situation?) There are references to what their reactions were, but I'm going to try to tease out their new, modified dynamics mostly through daily life. But of course, now that I think about it, perhaps it would have made sense to have a morning after scene (as unglorious as I imagine it to be) inserted at the end of chapter 13 so as to more concretely say 'yes, it's OFFICIAL'... *facepalm*

Well, we'll see how it all goes...

[cynchick]

Did they do it in the alley? Gawd I imagine that would have been cold!Cold, but undeniably hot since wall smex of any kind is total WIN. And Im sure it didnt end there, they had to go home sometime...XD.

Even if the chapter doesnt have a direct, present tense, morning after scene, I think it important to know how that went. I doubt it would have been all 'kiss-kiss, have a good day at work honey'. There would definitely be some awkwardness there, even if they have no regrets (and I hope they dont!) there would be an uncertainty for sure and I think it would also have the potential for some good comedy. :p And as a writer who has dealt with these situations in fics (also one who has overcome her squeamishness about writing smut) I know the readers will definitely want to know about "after".

Whatever you decide, I cant wait to see their new dynamics and how their new intimacy will change things about them both. :)

[wyntermute]

Alleyways = Good Times! :D

(I almost wish I had the ability to write that scene actually!)

There's a definite nod to what happened worked into the narrative at the beginning of the chapter, but now I'm almost tempted to write more of it... *ponders*