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Comments 19

askyoutoimagine February 13 2006, 09:44:19 UTC
If this is all too much work, you can make a list of things you don't immediately think of, that love also is. Force depth. There's nothing really wrong with have a straight list of assertions, because that list can be the argument itself, but that's a pretty advanced style at this point.

Love is a mango.
Love is a tree.
Love is the ax.
Love is the fireplace.

etc.

It makes logical progression towards a conclusion.

Of course, secretly, this is probably much harder than rewriting the essay completely.

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falynrose February 13 2006, 13:15:22 UTC
I don't understand the structure of this essay. I see the intro, and I see the conclusion, but your three (or four?) "body" paragraphs fail to make any solid points. It reads more like aimless ramble on "love" sandwiched between a beginning and an end. The main problem lies in the fact that this essay lacks any real focus (see above).

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