TITLE: The Break
CHAPTER 5
FANDOM: The OC
PAIRING: Ryan/Kirsten
SPOILERS: Through "The College Try"
RATING: PG (for now *snick*)
SUMMARY:
*****
Ryan frowned against the sunlight trying to break through his closed eyelids, not wanting to succumb to wakefulness just yet. Kirsten was still curled against him as she'd been lastnight, her chest rising and falling steadily. He vaguely realized that he should be back at the Cohen household, slumbering in the poolhouse, but this time he didn't care. It was Saturday today... and hopefully still early. He'd have plenty of time to get back before anyone realized he'd been away all night.
Besides, Kirsten was still sleeping soundly, and he didn't have the heart to wake her. He craned his neck and smiled, admiring the peaceful look on her face and feeling pleased he was able to help her fall asleep. If given a choice in the matter, he'd choose to sleep like this all the time -- with Kirsten attached to his side.
She was so beautiful in the mornings. Hair unstyled and sometimes unkempt... no makeup in place... wearing just pajamas, a robe, and that lovely Kirsten smile he so adored. Over the past few years, he had wanted to mention several times to her how beautiful he thought she was in the mornings. Sandy had always teased her that she looked frightening without makeup and styled hair, and for some reason this always grated on Ryan's nerves. He knew he was probably joking, but he still always felt the urge to defend Kirsten when Sandy used to make those comments.
Ryan carefully reached up and gently began stroking her hair, running his fingers downward through the silken strands and then back up, his thumb lightly brushing her temple. He leaned his cheek against her, his lips near her forehead, and contemplated the changes taking place between them. Kirsten's tone lastnight came back to him then -- echoing his flirt. And Kirsten wasn't flirtatious by nature, so Ryan had to wonder... did she feel the same?
He felt her begin to stir against him, her legs starting to move though one was still tangled between his, and he shifted slightly on the bed to give her room to move. When he shifted, however, she followed him, obviously still wanting to be pressed against him. Just as she'd done yesterday evening, she buried her face in his neck and let out a sleepy grumble.
Ryan chuckled silently, then heard her voice against his neck... still in that low, almost sexy, grumble. "Can you make the sun go away?"
He smiled and rubbed her back gently. "I wish I could."
Another mumble tickled his neck. "What time is it?"
Ryan glanced at his watch. "Seven-thirty."
"You should get back, Ryan," she sighed, now into his shoulder.
Her breath warmed him, and he held her a little tighter. "I know I should." He twitched a half smile. "You should let go of me."
"I know I should."
But neither of them moved. If anything, they just held a little tighter to one another. Ryan knew they were starting to get close to that imaginary line that had been between them for three years, and while the thought of finally crossing it was thrilling... it frightened him as well. There was still so much stuff to sort out... and not just between the two of them.
So reluctantly, Ryan released Kirsten and helped her up, smiling back when she gave a bashful smile. "Ryan, thank you for staying with me last night."
He avoided responding with 'it was my pleasure,' knowing that the truth of his words would be all too evident. So instead, he nodded and replied, "No problem."
A moment of awkward silence ensued, much like their moment at the airport a week ago just after they'd said goodbye to Seth. And much like that moment, Kirsten had her hands clasped together in front of her as she asked, "So will you be around the house later? I was thinking I'd drop by sometime in the afternoon, and hopefully speak with Sandy."
Ryan's eyebrows twitched upward briefly. "If you need me there, I'll be there. If you want to do it alone, then--"
"I think I'd feel better if you were there."
He nodded. The decision was made. "Then I'll be there."
Kirsten smiled. "Okay. Thank you."
He chuckled. "You always make it sound like it's an inconvenience for me, Kirsten. It's not."
"Well I'm still grateful." She stepped toward him and kissed his cheek, very near to the corner of his mouth as he'd done to her yesterday, and Ryan froze at the contact.
A bolt of electricity suddenly struck him from head to toe, and he sensed in the way that Kirsten seemed to tense up, that a bolt may have hit her too. They stood just inches away, staring at each other... each waiting for the other to make the next move.
Ryan knew what move he would have liked to have made... but he couldn't. Not yet. So instead, he closed the distance and pressed his lips to her forehead, his eyes slipping closed as he breathed her in. When he pulled away, their foreheads touched for just the smallest of moments before he took a step back. "I'll see you at the house later."
"Yeah," Kirsten replied, and Ryan noted she sounded a bit breathless; another mental note was inwardly jotted down. "See you later."
*****
When Ryan returned to the Cohen house, he was pleased to see that neither Sandy nor Seth had made attempts to start their day yet, so he was able to sneak back into the poolhouse undetected. Once inside, he flopped backwards onto his bed and replayed the past day.
He spent the night with Kirsten. Nothing sexual had occurred and yet the very statement still amazed him. He spent the night with her cuddled against him, her head pillowed on his chest and blonde hair fanned across his shoulder like a sunburst.
The sexual tension had been thick between them when they'd woken up, almost to the point of causing him to break. If he'd stayed a moment longer, he would have kissed her... and not on the forehead. His lips would have tunneled hers, and he would've been a goner.
He could still smell her on his clothes -- that fresh, 'Kirsten' scent he'd been in love with for two years. He could still feel her, the warmth of her body pressing into him, laying contentedly in the circle of his arms. He could still see her -- the peace on her face taking twenty years of stress off her. If anything, he had returned home more in love with her than he'd been the night before.
Did she feel the same, though? He couldn't help pondering this, despite the other, more important, things he should be considering. The way she behaved around him seemed to say so -- the flirty tone, the need for his presence and physical contact, the sexual electricity that sparked and crackled between them. But could he be sure that it was an actual, mutual attraction and not some transferance of stress or anxiety due to her current problems?
Ryan sighed, resolving that he had to let everything play out how it was supposed to play out, otherwise he'd drive himself insane. If Kirsten was attracted to him, he'd eventually receive a confirmation for his assumption. If she wasn't, then he wouldn't. It had to be as simple as that, and he had to stop worrying about it. The big things had to come first, anyway -- the fate of her marriage, and her living situation. Once that was sorted out, the rest of the pieces would fall into place accordingly.
**
"Dude, you have to get up!"
Ryan opened his eyes, swearing once again that he'd just been blinking a moment ago. Yet, as he swiveled his head to glance at the clock, he realized four hours had passed since he arrived home. "Seth?"
"Get up!" Seth darted to each window, opening the blinds and allowing the afternoon sun to burst through.
Ryan squinted against the garish light beating down on him and held his hand up as a shield. "Seth, what the hell are you doing?"
"You will not believe who's here!"
"Who?" Ryan grunted as he rolled off his mattress and to his feet. He began to rub his eyes.
"My mom."
His eyes popped open. "Kirsten's here already?"
"Yeah, she's talking with Dad in his office." Seth turned, about to go out the door, then paused. "What do you mean 'already'?"
"What?" Ryan was busy searching for a clean tee shirt to wear.
"You said 'already.' That she's here already. What do you mean?"
Ryan closed his eyes, his back turned to Seth. "I, uh... didn't realize I'd said it."
But he still felt his friend's eyes on him, scrutinizing him. "Do you know something?"
He turned around, plastering on a neutral expression. "What should I know?"
Seth narrowed his eyes warily. "You seem like you know a little something about something."
"And once again, you're not making any sense."
"Yeah, I know, but you had to have gotten used to that after three years, man."
Ryan sighed and followed his friend out of the poolhouse, schooling his features in preparation to see Kirsten once again.
TBC
{x-posted to
rystenlove}