Normally I’m very compulsive about changing my desktop picture regularly, not because I have a wide variety and that it would be shameful to allow one to hog the spotlight, but actually I easily wear tired of looking at the same picture, the image just loses its appeal to me. So a picture might hold its place on my desk top, for tops of a week, but ( Read more... )

I find it just so much easier to put on a smile, giggle at silly things, make my girly comments and go about things as if I’m having a good day, instead of confronting all the interrogating questions about why my mood isn’t upbeat and cheery. Then once I’m away and alone, I droop down into my colorless attitude and sulk in nothingness. No thoughts ( Read more... )

Grr ( Read more... )

I closed tonight with Brittney and I think it is funny how we both delight in sweeping the floor only if the titles are cluttered enough with food, dirt, etc to gather a small pile, which of course requires more work and concentration, but we both find it rather irritant and pointless to tend to a floor that entails just a spot check sweep ( Read more... )

Today I played tennis with my ipod strapped to my shorts, the cords running up my back, and plugged the music into my ears. I found it interesting to discover how much I relay on my hearing to play tennis. Without being able to hear the ball hit the court makes a big difference, maybe just because I’m not use to it. Also I found myself trying to ( Read more... )

Yes, so it has been a while since my last update ( Read more... )

I hate battling with my anger, because then once I’m left alone to think I drop my defense and realize how hurt I am. How afraid.
I hate this. I want to be able to hold my anger like you, because knowing that I’m hurting alone makes me hurt more.

Cool, I got a new penpal ( Read more... )

My mother has always told me ( Read more... )

I've been reflecting and it's just...I can't understand myself and some of the ways I go about things. I feel like such a dull person....I guess is what I'm thinking. No...hm. I just feel like I'm missing a part of me that I know I am, or could be. That (the feeling) doesn't make me feel wonderful.