003;

[wind_of_despair]

So. This is purgatory, then? It has to be, because everything and everyone is falling apart. I don't know what to make of any of this. I'm not used to be the one hurting, and it's awful and.. and unfair. And I know how childish that sounds and the thing is that I don't care about if it does or not.
   I am Xaldin. I am the whirlwind lancer. I don'

Comments

[shadowbullet]

Breaking apart, aren'cha?

.. What.

[falltheseventh]

Clearly, I'm no scientist, but the theory doesn't sound rather convincing. Or is it a desperate belief? I suppose I could sympathize with that somewhat.

[wind_of_despair]

I believe nothing. That is what being lost is all about.

[falltheseventh]

That sounds rather poetic, III.

[notfabala]

Perhaps you should seek solace in one that understands.

Private to Elphaba

[wind_of_despair]

The one I thought would won't. That's what the problem is.

I'm sorry if I'm misinterpreting you. But you do have a heart, and you do have emotions. And so you wouldn't.. quite understand what the desperation would be about, as it is quite obvious you're not trying to love.. but do. And the pains are different.

Re: Private to Xaldin

[notfabala]

I actually mean one of your kind. Vexen, I've found, is one of the more willing to listen and try and understand. I believe he is going through some turmoil at the moment as well. May not be the same, but nonetheless.

I don't care anymore. Trying to be someone that I'm not... Thats the worst mistake I've made since coming here.

Cold hearted is better than feeling...

Re: Private to Xaldin

[wind_of_despair]

Vexen and I have it more or less agreed that we do not delve into eachother's private affairs. I think that is how we have managed to keep on such good terms for as long as we have. And he seemed unwilling to enlighten me as to the details of his current situation; therefore I am inclined to do the same. We're both rather.. private creatures.
I'm surprising myself allowing this conversation to occurr at all. But.. you are a stranger. And neither of us have any reason to go out and tell the rest of the mansion of what we know of eachother. It makes it easier.

You do care. You're humanoid, and therefore you are incapable of not caring. It's the curse that comes with being sentinent. And the blessing.

Please don't say that. You don't know what it's like to be unfeeling, and uncaring. Take it from someone who knows.

[belovdsacrifice]

That is what a journal is for, isn't it? Expression of ones self to do so freely?

However, I'd be cautious. There are hackers here and I don't think you'd want private thoughts easily accessable.

[wind_of_despair]

Sometimes it feels as if I would care about whether or not everyone knew, and sometimes I do not. Everything is far too two-fold now to be considered of importance. At the moment, I care very little.

But I thank you for the concern.

[belovdsacrifice]

Simply stating that anything could be used against you. However what reason and what is to be gained from such actions... Thats the odd part. There is nothing here you have that they don't.

You're welcome.

[firstsilence]

No. It's not purgatory. But it's certainly close enough.

...Don't let the mansion win, Xaldin.

[wind_of_despair]

He's done this all by himself, no soulless house needed. That's the hard part.

[firstsilence]

...Xigbar? He did this? ...What has he said to you?

[ This just reinforces Xemnas's belief that he really does need a hug. :x ]

[wind_of_despair]

Nothing. He's merely moved on.

[ If he does, his mun should come online and let the man give him one! *shameless dancing* ]