I think the 1st person perspective is working just fine. I like the hook in the final sentence. Are you planning on pursuing the "immortal" thread, weither the charecter is a vampire, or not?
Something else to consider, (if you haven't already) is, what quality about this charecter has drawn the attention of the vampire (or whatever)? Why is she being offered immortality? What is the Mythology of your immortals? Do they age at all, very slowly, or at a normal pace? Stuff like that.
Comments 6
Reply
Something else to consider, (if you haven't already) is, what quality about this charecter has drawn the attention of the vampire (or whatever)? Why is she being offered immortality? What is the Mythology of your immortals? Do they age at all, very slowly, or at a normal pace? Stuff like that.
Good Luck,
Jason
Reply
well
WHERE is the rest?????
Reply
Vampire story I'm guessing? Either way, I can't wait to read where this is going.
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment