Clear Illusions.
『#001. Chapter One』
we are the bridge on the river
Fandom; Super Junior (슈퍼주니어)
Paring; Kyuhyun (규현) & Donghae (동해). Implied Kyuhyun (규현) & Aoi Yuu (蒼井優)
Notes of Interest; First Person. Alternate Universe. Crossover Pairing.
Do I try too hard?
It’s a simple question, but one that will probably draw out a complex answer. Through my life experience, it isn’t as if my approach to it has ever been carefree. At school I studied hard almost every available day. I tried to make my parents happy by scoring good grades and helping them around the home. And with my friends I tried to make everyone stay happy even if I never was.
That was always the case, I tried hard but nothing ever went according to plan.
Many said I was modest since childhood, I think it was just a façade for my self-doubt. I once studied so hard that I didn’t get enough sleep and failed the test I had studied so hard for. Under my parent’s wishes I kept a secret (that I shouldn’t have) for a very long time. And in order to save an underage drunk friend from getting hit by a car, I took his hit in replacement. I’m not saying I regret my decisions, but I wonder what life will be like if I keep going the way I’m going.
For now, I’m content with my life’s course. My dreams aren’t that far from reach, I want to write beautifully lyrical songs and perform them for a living; my part-time job pays me well, it’s nice to make some money while I’m still in University and I have been in a monogamous three month relationship with a Japanese exchange student. We met by chance at University, in one of the lectures; she chose to sit next to me and our relationship grew from there.
Tomorrow is her twenty-fourth birthday and I have yet to buy her a present. And that is why; I stand solemnly and contemplatively inside a small and quaint umbrella boutique. Despite its simplistic appearance outside, there are many umbrellas with unique designs. Some I found appealing and some, not-so appealing. Unsure of what umbrella to buy, I asked the register who was tidying up the displays in the front window.
“Excuse me, can you recommend me an umbrella?”
Initially, I thought he didn’t hear what I was saying; so I repeated myself a little louder.
“Excuse me, but can you recommend me an umbrella?”
Again, he didn’t hear me; which prompted me to give him a few quick taps on his shoulder. Afterwards, the man turned his head leading to my discovery that he had been wearing earphones the whole time. To put it bluntly, what sort of person did that when there was a customer in their store? And from the short distance, I could hear the stifled sounds of the music playing. I wondered if he was purposely trying to make himself deaf.
“Yes, can I help you?” he questioned with a cheerful demeanor and pulling out the white earphones.
Sighing lightly, I nodded my head and repeated myself for the third time.
“Can you recommend me an umbrella?” I asked in no tone at all.
As if he were Peter Pan trying to find a hidden treasure in Neverland; the man looked around the store. Once he finished, he looked up at me (he was only shorter by a few inches) then quirked an eyebrow up in sincere perplexity.
“Do you have one in mind?” he started. “If it’s just for protection from the rain, you’d have free reign; but if you specify your search I could recommended you a nice large umbrella for a storm or a nice small umbrella for a summer drizzle. If it’s just a fashion statement, again; you’d have free reign. But if it’s for a business meeting I could recommend a simple black or checkered designed umbrella or if it’s for a-”
“It’s for my girlfriend’s birthday.” I replied curtly. Under the realization that if I hadn’t had stopped him, two years would have had passed and I wouldn’t even have a girlfriend to give a present to anymore. Covertly, after my intrusion; the talkative worker eyed at me incredulously.
“You’re getting your girlfriend an umbrella for her birthday? Don’t boys like you buy flowers and teddy bears and diamonds so you can have sex for the first time?” Then it was my turn to look at him incredulously. I had only talked (well, he talked for the most part) with him for a few minutes and already he was treading on private manners.
“It’s not like that. She’s going to Japan the day after, and has talked about how it always rain there. I thought that if I got her an umbrella, she would always think of me when she used it,” I confessed without making any eye contact.
There was an awkward, lingering silence for a little while, until the boutique worker coughed and said, “Well, if it’s like that, why didn’t you mention it before? Your generation needs to learn how to communicate.”
It took a lot of restraint to not be rude and reply to him. Brushing past me, he went to an area of the shop were all the umbrellas were only solid colors; ranging from pink to white to black to green to blue to purple. Across the racks, his hand hovered over them before choosing a bright yellow umbrella that was of an adequate length and size.
“Why, yellow?” I questioned absently, there were many other designs among the bright store. It was safe to say that I was curious to know his answer.
“You said you wanted to protect her from the rain,” he began whilst strolling towards me “A yellow umbrella represents the sun. Therefore when she uses the umbrella, she’ll be reminded that you’re her sun that will clear out the rain. I guess it ends up being more meaningful than flowers and teddy bears and diamond, doesn’t it?”
Touched, I smiled and nodded. He did the same.
With the once awkward atmosphere changing into something warmer, it was soon interrupted by a ringing. Feeling the vibration in my pocket, I took it out and let it ring for a few milliseconds. In small hand gestures, I told him that I would buy the umbrella and that I’d take the call outside. As I took my first few steps the door, I pressed the answer button and was greeted by a soft female voice.
Just a few minutes later I felt something drip on my hair-the rain. Nature had great timing for everything.
“Goodbye, then,” I finished as I hung up. Her heartbreaking words kept repeating indefinitely in my head.
Like I said before, I tried hard but nothing ever went according to plan.
✩》