FIC - Days Like These (5/6)
Title: Days Like These (5/6)
Author: Wheelie47
Rating: R
Pairing: Luke and Noah
Word count: 3,905
Disclaimer: Don’t own characters, am not associated in any way with ATWT, Van and Jake. No offence intended.
Summary: What if, after being shot by Colonel Mayer, Luke is left permanently paralysed?
Author's notes: This story is set after Luke is shot by Colonel Mayer. It is set in a different timescale. It follows the show's timescale up till Luke got shot; so Luke and Noah were just starting out as a couple. Luke spent 6 months in hospital. They decided to start a new life together in LA several months after Luke leaves hospital, when Noah won a Scholarship at a film academy. In my mind they have been together just over a year in total and this story is about them both trying to deal with Luke's disability.
‘Casey, let go of me!’ Noah said desperately as he tried to pull himself free of Casey’s firm grip.
‘I have to talk to him…make him understand’ Noah voice cracked with raw emotion, the look in Luke’s eyes before he had turned and fled; shock, confusion, hurt and betrayal had made Noah’s heart break and made him feel sick to the stomach.
‘I would never do that, could never do that to Luke…Casey…you have to believe me’ Noah swiped the back of his hand over his lips and chin to wipe away the blood and hissed at the sting of his swollen lip while he searched Casey’s eyes for any sign of understanding.
‘Noah…we could be so good together… just give us a chance’ Andy pleaded from behind Noah’s shoulder; breaking his silence.
‘Are you insane!?!’ Noah whirled to face Andy, breaking free of Casey’s grip. He could feel the anger and frustration building within him and it was all directed at the man in front of him.
‘You attacked me…tried to forced yourself on me …right here … in my own kitchen … in front of Luke’ Noah almost growled through gritted teeth. The shock of what Andy had actually done suddenly hit Noah like a blow to the stomach. Just how far would he have gone? Noah blinked to try and rid himself of the unthinkable image and he felt his knees buckle a little.
‘What the fuck?!’ Noah heard Casey’s sharp intake of breath behind him as he felt him take a step closer.
‘Noah…please?’ Andy reached out and placed a hand on Noah’s forearm.
The unwanted touch sent shivers of revulsion up Noah’s arm and he suddenly wanted to be as far away from this jerk as possible.
Noah felt something snap inside him and he couldn’t stop himself as he swung his clenched fist into Andy’s face. Noah felt pain shoot through his hand as his knuckles connected with Andy’s jaw bone.
‘Don’t… ever…touch… me …again!’ Noah spat the words out while he watched with satisfaction as Andy slid down the fridge door to the floor, holding his hand to his face.
‘Stay away from me and Luke’ Noah demanded, using his full height to tower menacingly over Andy so he got the message loud and clear before turning on his heels and storming out of the kitchen. Every second he wasted on this man kept him away from Luke…
…
‘Noah…oh my god…what happened to you?!’ Ali came to an abrupt halt as she headed towards the kitchen only to be met by Noah charging through the doorway. She looked in horror as she saw his split and bruised lip, the blood smeared across his chin and the knuckles of his right hand inflamed and bleeding.
‘Please Noah…tell me?’ she looked up into his eyes and felt panic start to surge up inside her at the look of wild desperation in her friend’s eyes. What could have possibly happened to cause Noah to look like this?
‘Luke? Ali…have you seen Luke?’ Noah’s raw and ragged voice interrupted her thoughts as he grabbed her shoulders and looked directly into her eyes imploringly.
‘He went down the hall…towards the bedroom, I think. He looked pretty upset but he wouldn’t stop’ Ali’s mind started to race and wandered what the hell had happened in the kitchen.
‘Ask Casey’ Noah answered Ali’s question absentmindedly as he moved her round by the shoulders so he could step past her and head towards the hall…
…
‘Luke? Please let me in’ Noah called softly through the bathroom door. When he had opened their bedroom door it was all in darkness and he had been about to turn around and look elsewhere for Luke but he stopped as he spotted the chink of light under the bathroom door.
With his ear pressed up to the panelled door he could hear Luke quietly sobbing and the woeful sound shattered his heart.
‘Please Luke?!’ Noah pressed his forehead up against the wood and he felt his own tears start to fall unchecked as he felt himself fall apart. How could this day have ended up like this? It had started off so well. He silently cursed Andy, his father, Luke’s paralysis, fate and everything fucking else that had brought them to this point, to here and now as he turned and slid his back down the door to come to rest with his knees bent and his head in his hands, ignoring the sharp sting as the skin on his knuckles split open again. Fate always seemed to get in their way, almost as if it was testing the strength of their love for each other.
‘Luke...please? You have to know I would never do that to you…I just couldn’t. Let me in …please?’. Noah tried again, he had to make this right…
…
Luke heard the soft, desperate words through the door and he just knew deep down that Noah wouldn’t cheat on him; they had both been through so much to be together that he realised Noah wouldn’t throw all that away but the awful sight in the kitchen kept replaying in his head. The thought of Andy rolling his hips against Noah as he pressed him up against the fridge door made Luke feel sick to the stomach. It made him face the reality that he could never be that for Noah; could never take it further and be his first. He could never feel the hot, moist heat of Noah surrounding him as he pressed himself into his lover.
‘Luke…I know what it must of looked like…and I’m so sorry for that…but he…he tried to… force himself on me.’ Luke could clearly hear the trembling hesitancy in Noah’s voice as he tried to explain in between ragged sobs and it shook him to his very core. God! Noah must have been so terrified and all he had been doing was thinking about himself.
Suddenly he needed to see Noah, to hold him and whisper that it was going to be ok. Ignoring the sharp pain from the grazed knuckles of his left hand as he gripped the wheel rim he pushed himself nearer to the bathroom door and turned the lock.
He gasped when he saw Noah swivel on the floor to face him as he opened the door wide. His beautiful blue eyes were red rimmed and tears were rolling unchecked down his cheeks.
‘My god, Noah!’ Luke exclaimed in horror as he saw his split and swollen lip and he reached out tentatively with the fingers of his right hand to touch the bruised and bloodied skin.
‘Oh…Luke’ Noah let out a heartfelt cry and brought his hand up to cover Luke’s and gently turned his hand so he could place a soft kiss to Luke’s palm. The look of utter deflation mixed with apology and love that was etched on Luke’s features made Noah want to lock the bedroom door, crawl into bed with Luke’s arms around him and just forget about the rest of the world.
‘Noah …your hand!’ the concern was clear in Luke’s voice as he saw the bloodied and swollen skin around Noah’s knuckles.
‘I kinda hit him’ Noah gave Luke a small, shy half smile as he shrugged his shoulders, he didn’t want to talk or even think about Andy anymore.
Luke cradled Noah’s hand in the both of his and rested them together on his thigh as he used the thumb of his left hand to rub soothing circles over the skin above Noah’s knuckles.
‘Luke?’ Noah questioned as he stilled Luke’s hand when he saw Luke’s own bruised and swollen knuckles.
‘Doorframe’ Luke replied simply, a ghost of a smile passing over his lips. The irony wasn’t lost on him, that here they were both bruised and battered by the world and they were still clinging together.
Noah lent forward to place a kiss to the skin between Luke’s thumb and his first knuckle then rested his head in Luke’s lap and sighed as he felt Luke’s fingers comb through his hair…
…
‘Do you think they’re ok?’ Casey looked up from playing with Harvey to ask Ali as she stood in the kitchen cooking pancakes with the early morning sun streaming through the large windows.
‘I think so… at least they will be’ she paused as she was about to flip a pancake and thought back to last night when she stood outside Luke and Noah’s bedroom door wondering what to do and then she heard the low murmurings of softly spoken voices; at least they weren’t yelling at each other.
‘What smells so good?!’ Ali was interrupted from saying anything more as Noah came padding barefoot into the kitchen, scratching his bare stomach just above the waistband of his sleep pants and yawning widely.
‘Hey Harve’ he reached down and scratched in between the dog’s ears causing his tail to thump happily against the floor tiles.
‘You guys didn’t have to clean up’ Noah said slightly embarrassed as he looked around to see no remnants of last night’s party.
‘Sarah and Jess helped last night’ Ali explained, flipping finished pancakes onto a plate.
‘They were pretty awesome last night…ushered everybody out. They wanted to call the Police but I said that was your call, man’ Casey explained as he got to his feet.
‘Listen, Noah…I’m sorry for… you know… doubting you’ Casey said sheepishly as he hugged the taller man, patting him on the back.
‘You were only looking out for Luke…but thanks man. That means a lot’ Noah said earnestly, pulling back and looking Casey in the eyes. It did mean a lot; Luke and Casey had been friends for a long time and if Casey looked out for him half as much as he did for Luke then Noah counted himself as a lucky guy. He just wished that he’d had a friend like Casey when he was growing up.
‘Are you guys ok?’ Ali asked, coming round the counter and running her hand up Noah’s arm. She was concerned for her friend; she had become really close to Noah and she hated that him and Luke never seemed to have an easy time of it.
‘Thanks Ali; we will be…I just want to move on and forget about Andy. I don’t think he’ll bother either of us again after last night!’ He certainly hoped he had made that plain to Andy; he didn’t want anything to do with that creep again.
‘I’m just gonna grab some of this delicious smelling breakfast and go see if Luke’s hungry’ Noah said, bending to place a soft kiss on Alison’s cheek before he loaded a tray with a plate full of pancakes and two mugs of aromatic coffee and turned to head back to their bedroom with Harvey close on his heels…
…
‘I wish you guys could’ve stayed longer’ Luke said looking crestfallen as they waited at the airport terminal for Casey and Ali’s flight to be called.
‘Me too’ Ali rubbed Luke’s shoulder as she could feel the tears start to well in her eyes and she didn’t trust her voice to say anything more. She wasn’t the best at goodbyes and she had so wanted this weekend to be a time to catch up and they had ended up picking up the pieces after the party.
‘Yeah…sorry it didn’t work out the way we planned’ Noah apologised before leaning down to plant a quick, reassuring kiss to the top of Luke’s head, resting his hands on Luke’s shoulders.
‘We’ll work something out and get together again soon’ Luke promised, reaching up to interlink his fingers with Noah’s.
Noah looked down at their joined fingers and felt a wave of emotion surge over him; when he had first met Luke he could barely recognise his own feelings let alone think about displaying those feelings in public. Now here he was kissing Luke and holding his hand for all the world to see and he didn’t care; didn’t even think about it most of the time. Despite what his father had tried to do, he hadn’t won; they were still together and although it wasn’t always easy, he couldn’t imagine his life without Luke.
Ali smiled gently as she watched Noah deep in thought and she knew that despite everything they would be ok as long as they had each other.
‘Hey guys, they just called our flight!’ Casey said as he came back from the bathroom and kissed Ali on the cheek as he reached his arm around her back.
‘You guys take care of each other’ Ali whispered in Noah’s ear as she pulled him into a hug before doing the same to Luke.
‘Later Dudes!’ Casey called as he shouldered their carry on before they both turned and headed down the concourse towards the boarding gate…
…
‘Why did I think this was a good idea’ Luke groaned to himself as he sat, legs dangling, in the hoist over the hydrotherapy pool. It had seemed like a good idea when his doctor had suggested that a short course of hydrotherapy sessions might help Luke. They wouldn’t help Luke get any feeling or movement back; the Colonel’s bullet had made sure of that when it had severed his spinal cord but it would help with the nerve pain and would be good for circulation and muscle tone. Now Luke couldn’t help but admit that he was feeling a little nervous about the whole thing. It was the helplessness and loss of control that got to him the most; Noah had even had to help him put his swimming trunks on.
Noah, thought Luke as he looked down and saw his boyfriend already in the pool looking up at him with an encouraging smile, at least Noah was able to come with him. The hydrotherapist had said it would be good for Noah to join in and see what exercises they could do in the water, in case they wanted to carry on with the exercises after the course.
Luke watched his toes enter the water; he didn’t think he would ever get used to the experience of watching the lower half of his body being lowered into water and not feel the sensation of it around him till it reached above his waist.
‘Hey’ he said quietly as he came level with Noah and the hoist finally stopped moving.
‘Hey. Feel how warm the water is. Just like having a bath’ Noah could tell by the look in Luke’s eyes that he was starting to freak out a little so he tried to help him relax. He gently scooped up handfuls of water and let it run down Luke’s arms and chest so he could get used to the feeling of the water.
‘Noah… our bath isn’t this big; at least I can touch the sides at home’ Luke whined.
‘Ok …right guys.’ Martin, the hydrotherapist, said as he switched off the hoist, before entering the water.
‘I’m going to explain everything that we‘re going to do before we do it, so that you’ll know what to expect. If you don’t feel comfortable with anything, Luke …you just let me know. Ok?’ Martin made his way across the pool to reach Luke’s side.
Luke nodded his head and gave him an uncertain half smile.
‘Right…Noah if you could get behind Luke and support him. Luke, I’m going to get rid of the sling and put this float under your ankles, ok?’ Martin reached for a circular float with a hole in the middle.
‘Ok’ Luke said, trying to ignore the nervous feeling at the pit of his stomach.
‘Like this?’ Noah asked, moving behind Luke and bending his knees a little so he could support the back of Luke’s head against the crook of his shoulder and neck while reaching one arm round his torso and the other further down to support the small of his back.
‘Perfect’ Martin replied while removing the sling and slipping the float in place with practiced ease.
With the addition of another float under his hips, Luke found himself floating horizontally in the water with Noah right behind him, supporting under his shoulders.
‘You ok?’ Noah breathed quietly into Luke ear.
‘It’s actually quite relaxing once you get used to it’ the surprise sounding clear in Luke’s voice. He wasn’t sure if that was because he was beginning to enjoy the experience or that he just liked having Noah this close even if it was in the pool.
Noah relaxed against the side of the pool while he watched Martin work with Luke through a series of exercises He felt so proud of Luke, sure Luke could whine and get frustrated but given the circumstances who wouldn’t but Luke had an inner strength that Noah really admired. Noah didn’t think that he would have coped with everything as well as Luke did.
Martin decided to call it a day after about thirty minutes with a warning to Luke to take it easy for the rest of the day because he had worked his shoulder and torso muscles hard.
Luke had almost fallen asleep as Noah drove home and had, to Noah’s surprise made no complaint when he suggested that Luke take a nap.
Noah had cleaned up round the house for a couple of hours then decided to make Luke a snack and go wake him up; too much sleep in the day would mean that Luke wouldn’t be able to sleep at night and would end up getting uncomfortable and frustrated.
Noah stood in the threshold of their bedroom and took a minute to watch Luke sleeping. Luke always looked so young and rested when he was asleep like he hadn’t got a care in the world and if he ignored the wheelchair by the side of the bed Noah could almost imagine that the events of the last year were a bad dream.
Noah sighed slightly as he pushed himself off the doorframe and placed the tray carrying a plate full of grilled cheese and two glasses of orange juice on the bedside table before he sat down on the bed next to Luke.
Leaning over, Noah pressed a kiss to Luke’s forehead just above his eyebrow then sat back and brushed a strand of Luke’s hair back behind his ear; Noah loved how the LA sun suited Luke’s complexion and bleached his hair a shade lighter.
‘Mmmh … something smells good!’ Luke’s sleep laden voice made Noah smile.
‘Grilled cheese…thought you might be hungry’ he replied as he helped Luke sit up and rest back against the headboard.
‘You’re too good to me, you know that?! How long have I been asleep?’ Luke smiled a wide and heartfelt smile and placed a quick kiss to the tip of Noah’s nose.
‘Couple of hours’ blushing slightly, Noah grabbed the tray and placed it in between them as he sat against the headboard beside Luke.
‘Wow, guess I worked harder than I thought! Noah? I’ve been thinking’ Luke paused, turning slightly to face Noah as best he could.
‘Should I run for the hills?!’ Noah joked, secretly praying that this was something he wanted to hear.
‘Yeah, you should…if that’s the best joke you’ve got!’ Luke teased, grabbing Noah’s piece of grilled cheese out of his hand before he could take a bite and took a bite of it himself.
‘Seriously, though…I’ve been thinking’ Luke leaned over and fed Noah the last bite.
‘I want to take some classes again; Creative Writing and English Lit. I want to do something with my days. That workshop really gave me some ideas and I want to start somewhere.’ The last words came out in a rush as he could feel the anticipation building. Sure he was scared; maybe he wouldn’t be able to do it but he wouldn’t know till he tried, just like today with the hydrotherapy.
‘Really?! That’s fantastic!!’ Noah moved the tray and scooted up close to Luke’s side, pulling him into a hug. He could feel the tears starting to well in his eyes and held onto to Luke a little bit longer, fearing that if he looked at Luke now nothing would stop the tears.
Luke could feel Noah’s ragged breath, hot against his neck and he reached up to rub small, comforting circles between his shoulders.
‘There’s more, Noah’ Luke continued when he could feel Noah’s breathing even out and could trust his own voice again.
‘I need to ask you something’ he gently pushed at Noah’s shoulders to get him to sit back so Luke could look at him.
‘Well…going to the workshop also made me think about helping others. When I saw Laura I really wanted to try and reach out to her and the only way I could think of doing that was to tell her about my life’ Luke paused, trying to find the right words to continue.
Noah nodded his head in encouragement, taking Luke’s hand in his.
‘And…that’s why I want to take the classes …so I can try and help other people by learning how to tell my story…our story…and that’s where you come in, Noah’ Luke continued, squeezing Noah’s hand slightly.
‘Cause…you see…I can’t do that unless it’s ok with you; unless you’re ok with me writing about us and your father and everything.’ Luke stopped and held his breath, he really wanted to do this but he wouldn’t if Noah wasn’t ok with it all.
The silence in the room was almost unbearable for Luke and he felt he had to say something, anything.
‘It’s ok, Noah…don’t worry …it was a lot to ask. I’ll take the classes anyway and…mmhh’ Luke’s rambling was interrupted by Noah’s lips against his.
‘You…I…you’re amazing you know that?’ Noah struggled to get his words out when he sat back from the kiss.
‘After everything my father put us through … most people wouldn’t want to talk about him ever again…but you want to write about him…to help others no less’
‘Too much?’ Luke asked uncertainly.
‘I think… it’s a fantastic idea…hell yeah…lets do it. Might even do us some good in the process … exorcising the demons kinda thing.’ Noah said almost giddily.
‘I love you, Noah’ Luke whispered against Noah’s lips as Noah pulled him into another kiss.
‘I love you too’ Noah said simply after they broke for breath; no more words than those were needed…
Chapter 6
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