Tarnished Angels (SMM Universe) Section Twenty-Eight
Title: Tarnished Angels
Section: 28
Pairing: Min/Other (some jaeho and yoosu along the way)
Section Rating: Rish
Overall Rating: NC-17
Blame: ranalore
Summary: Hot Korean boys. A seduction. An alluring. A temptation. And Min's self-discovery.
Sections: One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Se7en, Eight, Nine, Ten, Eleven (Lemon), Twelve; Thirteen; Fourteen; Fifteen, Sixteen; Se7enteen; Eighteen; Minteen; Twenty; Twenty-One (Lime); Twenty-Two; Twenty-Three; Twenty-Four (Lemon); Twenty-Five; Twenty-Six; Twenty-Se7en (Lemon)
Related Fics: So Much Mine and Lavender Bunny. Links go to PDFs. Other related fics can be found at my LJ: wedspawn
The beep of a missed call woke Changmin up, his cell chirping to poke at his languid brain. Turning over onto his stomach, he reached for his phone and jerked awake when his hand failed to connect with his nightstand.
Instead, his fingers were met with the solid curve of Se7en’s shoulder.
Sitting up, Min winced, his body aching with a steady throb as he moved. Measuring the tiny pangs, he concluded it was less pain and more discomfort as if he’d overexerted a particular part of his body. Well, his mind reasoned, you did stretch out parts of us that haven’t done those things before.
The memory of Se7en’s mouth and fingers on and in him brought a new wave of tingling burn to his face, unseen by the man sleeping next to him. Changmin was thankful for his lover’s slumber. Less thankful for the incessant pressure on his bladder and then the shock of thinking he slept too late and missed the van to take him to the group’s first appointment.
Scrambling off the mattress, he dug around his backpack, coming up with his cell. Scanning through the messages while hurrying to the toilet, Min sighed with relief to see that it was not only a couple of hours until he was supposed to be at the apartment but also that the event had been cancelled because of rain. His day was now totally free. And he fully intended to crawl back into bed and sleep for as long as his body would let him.
Spending a few minutes in the bathroom was a welcome relief as was the new toothbrush Se7en left on the counter for him, just in case he’d forgotten his own.
He’s too good for you, the gremlin muttered. You need to be nicer to him. Take care of him more.
Shut up. Min scolded his inner brain. If you can’t be helpful, you need to stop talking. I need to trade you in for a more supportive sub-conscious. One that comes up with suggestions.
Without me, you’d spend all of your time dreaming, he scoffed at himself. And walk into doors.
Grumbling at his own thoughts, Changmin returned to the bedroom and stopped to stare at the man who became his lover.
Se7en’s nudity against the soft white sheets was a beautiful sight for Min, the sleek curve of his back covered from the waist down by the bed’s rumpled linens. A mane of black hair framed his peaceful, sleeping face, the bridge of his nose straight and leading down to a sensual, relaxed pout. Se7en’s long lashes gave the illusion of dusky kohl sweeps under the pale blush of his lids, his strong eyebrows arching over his brow ridge.
Awake, Se7en’s handsomeness was defined by his quick, grinning mouth and expressive eyes. In sleep, his beauty bloomed under the faint erotic voyeur feel of watching his soul rise up from his body and into the calm of his face.
Changmin eased onto the mattress, crossing his legs underneath him and stared at his lover, unsure of how to feel about the man who opened up unexplored worlds for him to see.
Se7en held secrets, he realized. The carefree playboy was a thoughtful, methodical artist wrapped up by layers of silken tapestry that was meant to circumvent attention away from what was in the core; a very-human man who longed to love and give love, asking nothing in return but friendship and honesty.
Min wondered if he’d given Se7en those things. Then realized he could definitely give more.
“I could be more honest with you.” Changmin murmured to the slumbering man, watching Se7en’s mouth twitch slightly as the other man’s dreams played behind his closed lids. “And I could trust you more.”
“I spent a lot of time listening to what other people thought of you and then I realize now that I’m listening to people who only see what you want them to see.” Pulling his legs up, he rested his chin on one chin and contemplated what he was going to do and be with Se7en.
A softly throbbing reminder inside of him gave Min clear perspective of how much Se7en adored him. He’d known it could have been worse. There were stories that he’d heard from Scarlet and Jaejoong, whispered horrors spoken when the pair thought that he wasn’t listening.
He’d been listening, all right. And the details terrified him.
Jaejoong bore scars on his mind and heart. Min knew there were boys who wore them on their bodies. It hurt so much to find out Se7en was one of those young men. He’d seen the clouds in his lover’s eyes when he’d talked about his first lover and sitting down with the slight discomfort he was having even after Se7en’s careful lovemaking, Min’s heart ached at the thought of how much pain he could have been in if Se7en had been less patient.
Or if he’d let Rain touch him again.
The thrill of Bi’s mouth on his at the time seemed to be an exotic forbidden thing. In retrospect, the kiss seemed sordid and dirty, something to be washed from his lips and scrubbed from his mind. There’d been none of Se7en’s fire or compassion, just a slithering of lust and the taint of being used for satisfaction. Changmin could see the difference now. And was glad to have escaped the same fate that his lover suffered when he’d been younger.
“I’m sorry it wasn’t good for you, Shichi.” Min whispered. “I’m so sorry.”
He kissed Se7en’s temple, softly so as not to waken the older man. Sliding down to his side, he rested his head on the pillow, their noses nearly touching. Min couldn’t believe he was awake. He could sleep anywhere and often did, a skill the other members envied. Now, laying besides his lover, the last thing he wanted to do was sleep. The world seemed so peaceful enrobed in rain and cradled by soft linens that smelled of their tangled bodies.
If he could, Min would steal the sheets and make them into a stuffed fox he could take with him where ever he slept.
Where did that come from? Changmin wondered. Why do I want to take pieces of what he’s given me and tuck them away so I can have them always? Jaejoong told me that I shouldn’t worry about how we love. Just that I should love.
Of course, Se7en said that it would be a good thing to leave Jaejoong out of our bed, his mind whispered. Why do you keep dragging him back in?
He gives good advice, Min nodded to himself. Joongie-ah is the one who told me to explore and take my time and that Se7en was being patient because he loved me, not because he didn’t want me.
“Ah, so early in the morning for such a serious look.” Se7en murmured, his eyes open and on Min’s face.
“How long have you been watching me?” Changmin narrowed his eyes, making a face.
“I don’t know.” Se7en stretched, still on his belly. “How long have you been watching me?”
“Not long enough.” The slight smile he got from that mouth made Min’s stomach jump. When that mouth moved over to kiss his toes, he couldn’t help but giggle, Se7en’s tongue making the crease under his big toe sloppy and wet.
“Stay here. I’ll be right back.” Se7en murmured, sliding from the bed and padding over to the bathroom.
The man prowled, Min thought, watching his lover through the open door. Brushing your teeth naked shouldn’t be arousing but Se7en’s wide shoulders, trim hips and taut backside was nothing if not erotic. Stepping around the corner to the toilet niche, Se7en stayed out of view for a minute then returned to wash his hands, winking in the mirror’s reflection. He stalked through the bedroom, easing himself onto the sheets and kissing Min’s ankle before snuggling up against the younger man.
“Good, you didn’t move.” Se7en peeked over Min’s shoulder at the clock. “I’ve got to get you home soon.”
“Our outing was cancelled. I guess it was supposed to be held outside and it’s too wet. All of our fans would drown.”
“That would be bad.” Nodding somberly, Se7en kept a straight face. “It’s hard to get new fans if you drown the old ones.”
“Yes, very bad.” He agreed, rubbing the tip of his lover’s nose with his own. “I wanted to say thank you.”
“For what?” His mouth pursed as he thought back on what he’d just done. “For the toothbrush?”
“No,” Min slapped Se7en’s shoulder lightly, kissing at the spot when the older man huffed in false outrage. “For last night. You made me feel so good.”
“Good. I’m glad.” Running his hand over Min’s hip, Se7en kissed him. The older man’s mouth tasted of cinnamon gel and masculinity, a rougher kiss softened by the intimacies they’d shared the night before. “You doing okay?”
“Yeah, I’m good.” Burrowing down into the soft feather top of the mattress, Min stared into his lover’s eyes. “I was thinking that your first time should be like mine is.”
“Ah, no helping it now.” The older man shrugged, moving his hips over until he could tangle his legs into Min’s lanky shins. “I’m just glad it’s me… instead of Rain.”
“God,” Min buried his face into Se7en’s bare chest. “I can’t believe that you know about Rain. Did Yunho tell you?”
“Partly,” Se7en hedged. “I guessed about the whole thing, really. From what you said and things I overheard between you and the others. And I have to be honest with you, after you told me that someone hurt you, I asked someone to find out who it was for me.”
“Why did you do that?” There was an ember of anger in Min’s voice, subdued when Se7en gently kissed the space between his eyes.
“I found out it was Rain before he could find out anything.” The singer said. “And I guess I’m more like Yunho than I care to admit.”
“When I heard about what he’d done, I was so fucking pissed off.” Se7en admitted. “I wanted to hurt him and I was scared deep down inside that it was one of my friends. Because you deserved better than to be treated like something to discard when he was done. I fully acknowledge that I’m a protective bastard and I don’t like seeing my friends hurt. And you are, first and foremost, Minku, my friend.”
“What would you have done if you found out from this guy?” Min asked softly, his cheek pressed against the pillow.
“Probably wanted to go beat the shit out of Bi.” He said calmly. “I’m not saying I’m a good guy, Minku. I’m not perfect.”
“I think he would have treated me like your dance instructor did.” Whispering, Min looked down, feeling a brush of hot tears along his lashes. “Maybe not as bad but I think I wouldn’t have liked it.”
“All the more reason to pound the shit out of him.” Se7en agreed. “But apparently, someone got to it before I could. So, moot point. All I’ve got to ask is that if he ever touches you again, you let me know.”
“No,” Min shook his head, sniffing back his tears. “I’ve got to deal with things on my own. If I tell any of you about it, I’ll make you promise not to do anything about it first. I’m good at extracting promises beforehand.”
“I noticed you throwing Junsu to the wolves before we left.” Se7en grinned. “Strategic tactic?”
“Ah, I knew he’d be safe.” A snort dismissed any threat Junsu might have faced. “Yunnie wouldn’t do anything to him because of Jaejoong and Chunnie. It was a small revenge. I have better still hidden. He’ll know better about crossing me in the future or making fun of you. A small price to pay for future silence.”
“Ah my little Sun Tzu.” Se7en laughed, cuddling Min close. “Remind me not to leave my Blackberry where you could find it.”
“I would never blackmail you.” Changmin murmured, biting lightly into Se7en’s lower lip. “I have other ways of getting you to do what I want you to.”
“True,” Se7en replied, gifting Min with another kiss. “So very true.”
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Minku, I would think that there was something wrong with you if you didn’t ask questions.”
“Did you like it when I…” Changmin stumbled, his tongue refusing to comply with the words his mind was forcing onto it. “Um…”
“When you reciprocated?” Se7en moved his foot along Min’s ankle, brushing his toes on the younger man’s heel.
“Good word.” He nodded in agreement. “Yes, reciprocated. Did you mind? Or did you say you liked it because you didn’t want me to feel bad.”
“Honey, I liked it a lot.” A knowing grin lit up Se7en’s face, crinkling his eyes. “You didn’t believe me?”
“I just…” Min took in a deep breath. “You’re going to think I’m silly but I really only have Jaejoong and Yunho when I want to compare relationships. And well, my mom and our family. Junsu and Yoochun, you just can’t take them seriously.”
“You’re confusing me, Minku. What are you worried about?”
“”Yunho is very dominant.” He thought on it, thinking of the older members’ interactions. “And it just seems like when I did that to you, it crossed over into what you should be doing to me instead of what I should be doing to you.”
Se7en exhaled thoughtfully, his eyes unfocused as he gathered his thoughts. Clearing his throat, he took his time replying. Min shifted on the bed, impatient and wondering if he’d somehow insulted the older man or shouldn’t have spoken of it.
“Baby, I guess the problem is that you’re thinking of our relationship top and bottom or seme and uke.” There wasn’t any of the customary amusement in Se7en’s voice, more of a tenderness as he shared what was in his heart. “Yes, we are two halves of some kind of whole but I don’t like to say that I’m going to dominate you every single time we have sex.”
“There’s a problem, I think, when two guys love each other.” Se7en explained. “I think we’re conditioned to try to fit our relationship into the traditional roles of a man and a woman, where one guy basically is the object and the other is the receptacle. Because that’s pretty much how a heterosexual relationship works.”
“But see, Minku, we’re not women. Our sexual organs are different. And our needs are different. We may love or want other guys but we’re guys.” He laved Min’s mouth, feeling the softness of his lover’s lips. “I like both men and women. I like have sex with either and I don’t want to confine myself to the traditional masculine role of topping someone because I’m supposed to be the more masculine of the guy.”
“You expect me to…?” Min’s breath shortened. “I’ve never done that. I wouldn’t know how…”
“I’m not saying that we have to take turns or that it has to be this purely my turn-your turn thing.” Se7en explained. “I’m just telling you that if you want to, I’d like to. I don’t do that as often as I like probably because it takes a lot of trust on my part where my partner is concerned. I trust you, Minku and I think we can make it a pleasant experience for both of us but only if and when you’re ready.”
“Don’t constrict yourself to a role, baby.” The older man cautioned. “Don’t get caught up in what you think your position in bed should be. It can be what ever you want it to be. You’re a guy. You’re masculine. Don’t cheat yourself or try to shape yourself into something you think society wants just because you like having sex with men.”
“That’s hard to understand, Shichi.” Changmin’s mind wandered, crossing over boundaries he’d put up to help guide him along his relationship with the other man. “I… Jaejoong…”
“Jaejoong and Yunho have their relationship.” Se7en shrugged. “It’s theirs, for better or for worse. And maybe one day they’ll change how they love on another. And, baby, I understand how you thought that I might only want to make love to you and not be made love to. I get that. I’m just telling you, don’t worry about it and if ever you feel like you want to try it, I’m more than happy to let you. Hell, I’d love it. With your curiosity and enthusiasm, I think it would be a mind-blowing experience.”
“Just your mind?” Min teased, gently poking humour. “I liked doing it to other things too.”
“Oh that’s bad.” Se7en muttered, narrowing his eyes. “I think, that is so horrible, you should be punished for it.”
“Oh?” Min lifted an eyebrow, tilting his chin up in challenge. “What did you have in mind?”
“I was thinking,” Se7en kissed him soundly before pulling himself off the bed, grabbing a pair of sweats to pull on. “That you’re going to have to choke down my cooking…instead of other things that I think I’d prefer you to swallow. Come on, Minku. I’m hungry and you are going to need to keep your strength up. Can't have you wasting away when I've got plans for you and that delicious body of yours.”
Section: 28
Pairing: Min/Other (some jaeho and yoosu along the way)
Section Rating: Rish
Overall Rating: NC-17
Blame: ranalore
Summary: Hot Korean boys. A seduction. An alluring. A temptation. And Min's self-discovery.
Sections: One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Se7en, Eight, Nine, Ten, Eleven (Lemon), Twelve; Thirteen; Fourteen; Fifteen, Sixteen; Se7enteen; Eighteen; Minteen; Twenty; Twenty-One (Lime); Twenty-Two; Twenty-Three; Twenty-Four (Lemon); Twenty-Five; Twenty-Six; Twenty-Se7en (Lemon)
Related Fics: So Much Mine and Lavender Bunny. Links go to PDFs. Other related fics can be found at my LJ: wedspawn
The beep of a missed call woke Changmin up, his cell chirping to poke at his languid brain. Turning over onto his stomach, he reached for his phone and jerked awake when his hand failed to connect with his nightstand.
Instead, his fingers were met with the solid curve of Se7en’s shoulder.
Sitting up, Min winced, his body aching with a steady throb as he moved. Measuring the tiny pangs, he concluded it was less pain and more discomfort as if he’d overexerted a particular part of his body. Well, his mind reasoned, you did stretch out parts of us that haven’t done those things before.
The memory of Se7en’s mouth and fingers on and in him brought a new wave of tingling burn to his face, unseen by the man sleeping next to him. Changmin was thankful for his lover’s slumber. Less thankful for the incessant pressure on his bladder and then the shock of thinking he slept too late and missed the van to take him to the group’s first appointment.
Scrambling off the mattress, he dug around his backpack, coming up with his cell. Scanning through the messages while hurrying to the toilet, Min sighed with relief to see that it was not only a couple of hours until he was supposed to be at the apartment but also that the event had been cancelled because of rain. His day was now totally free. And he fully intended to crawl back into bed and sleep for as long as his body would let him.
Spending a few minutes in the bathroom was a welcome relief as was the new toothbrush Se7en left on the counter for him, just in case he’d forgotten his own.
He’s too good for you, the gremlin muttered. You need to be nicer to him. Take care of him more.
Shut up. Min scolded his inner brain. If you can’t be helpful, you need to stop talking. I need to trade you in for a more supportive sub-conscious. One that comes up with suggestions.
Without me, you’d spend all of your time dreaming, he scoffed at himself. And walk into doors.
Grumbling at his own thoughts, Changmin returned to the bedroom and stopped to stare at the man who became his lover.
Se7en’s nudity against the soft white sheets was a beautiful sight for Min, the sleek curve of his back covered from the waist down by the bed’s rumpled linens. A mane of black hair framed his peaceful, sleeping face, the bridge of his nose straight and leading down to a sensual, relaxed pout. Se7en’s long lashes gave the illusion of dusky kohl sweeps under the pale blush of his lids, his strong eyebrows arching over his brow ridge.
Awake, Se7en’s handsomeness was defined by his quick, grinning mouth and expressive eyes. In sleep, his beauty bloomed under the faint erotic voyeur feel of watching his soul rise up from his body and into the calm of his face.
Changmin eased onto the mattress, crossing his legs underneath him and stared at his lover, unsure of how to feel about the man who opened up unexplored worlds for him to see.
Se7en held secrets, he realized. The carefree playboy was a thoughtful, methodical artist wrapped up by layers of silken tapestry that was meant to circumvent attention away from what was in the core; a very-human man who longed to love and give love, asking nothing in return but friendship and honesty.
Min wondered if he’d given Se7en those things. Then realized he could definitely give more.
“I could be more honest with you.” Changmin murmured to the slumbering man, watching Se7en’s mouth twitch slightly as the other man’s dreams played behind his closed lids. “And I could trust you more.”
“I spent a lot of time listening to what other people thought of you and then I realize now that I’m listening to people who only see what you want them to see.” Pulling his legs up, he rested his chin on one chin and contemplated what he was going to do and be with Se7en.
A softly throbbing reminder inside of him gave Min clear perspective of how much Se7en adored him. He’d known it could have been worse. There were stories that he’d heard from Scarlet and Jaejoong, whispered horrors spoken when the pair thought that he wasn’t listening.
He’d been listening, all right. And the details terrified him.
Jaejoong bore scars on his mind and heart. Min knew there were boys who wore them on their bodies. It hurt so much to find out Se7en was one of those young men. He’d seen the clouds in his lover’s eyes when he’d talked about his first lover and sitting down with the slight discomfort he was having even after Se7en’s careful lovemaking, Min’s heart ached at the thought of how much pain he could have been in if Se7en had been less patient.
Or if he’d let Rain touch him again.
The thrill of Bi’s mouth on his at the time seemed to be an exotic forbidden thing. In retrospect, the kiss seemed sordid and dirty, something to be washed from his lips and scrubbed from his mind. There’d been none of Se7en’s fire or compassion, just a slithering of lust and the taint of being used for satisfaction. Changmin could see the difference now. And was glad to have escaped the same fate that his lover suffered when he’d been younger.
“I’m sorry it wasn’t good for you, Shichi.” Min whispered. “I’m so sorry.”
He kissed Se7en’s temple, softly so as not to waken the older man. Sliding down to his side, he rested his head on the pillow, their noses nearly touching. Min couldn’t believe he was awake. He could sleep anywhere and often did, a skill the other members envied. Now, laying besides his lover, the last thing he wanted to do was sleep. The world seemed so peaceful enrobed in rain and cradled by soft linens that smelled of their tangled bodies.
If he could, Min would steal the sheets and make them into a stuffed fox he could take with him where ever he slept.
Where did that come from? Changmin wondered. Why do I want to take pieces of what he’s given me and tuck them away so I can have them always? Jaejoong told me that I shouldn’t worry about how we love. Just that I should love.
Of course, Se7en said that it would be a good thing to leave Jaejoong out of our bed, his mind whispered. Why do you keep dragging him back in?
He gives good advice, Min nodded to himself. Joongie-ah is the one who told me to explore and take my time and that Se7en was being patient because he loved me, not because he didn’t want me.
“Ah, so early in the morning for such a serious look.” Se7en murmured, his eyes open and on Min’s face.
“How long have you been watching me?” Changmin narrowed his eyes, making a face.
“I don’t know.” Se7en stretched, still on his belly. “How long have you been watching me?”
“Not long enough.” The slight smile he got from that mouth made Min’s stomach jump. When that mouth moved over to kiss his toes, he couldn’t help but giggle, Se7en’s tongue making the crease under his big toe sloppy and wet.
“Stay here. I’ll be right back.” Se7en murmured, sliding from the bed and padding over to the bathroom.
The man prowled, Min thought, watching his lover through the open door. Brushing your teeth naked shouldn’t be arousing but Se7en’s wide shoulders, trim hips and taut backside was nothing if not erotic. Stepping around the corner to the toilet niche, Se7en stayed out of view for a minute then returned to wash his hands, winking in the mirror’s reflection. He stalked through the bedroom, easing himself onto the sheets and kissing Min’s ankle before snuggling up against the younger man.
“Good, you didn’t move.” Se7en peeked over Min’s shoulder at the clock. “I’ve got to get you home soon.”
“Our outing was cancelled. I guess it was supposed to be held outside and it’s too wet. All of our fans would drown.”
“That would be bad.” Nodding somberly, Se7en kept a straight face. “It’s hard to get new fans if you drown the old ones.”
“Yes, very bad.” He agreed, rubbing the tip of his lover’s nose with his own. “I wanted to say thank you.”
“For what?” His mouth pursed as he thought back on what he’d just done. “For the toothbrush?”
“No,” Min slapped Se7en’s shoulder lightly, kissing at the spot when the older man huffed in false outrage. “For last night. You made me feel so good.”
“Good. I’m glad.” Running his hand over Min’s hip, Se7en kissed him. The older man’s mouth tasted of cinnamon gel and masculinity, a rougher kiss softened by the intimacies they’d shared the night before. “You doing okay?”
“Yeah, I’m good.” Burrowing down into the soft feather top of the mattress, Min stared into his lover’s eyes. “I was thinking that your first time should be like mine is.”
“Ah, no helping it now.” The older man shrugged, moving his hips over until he could tangle his legs into Min’s lanky shins. “I’m just glad it’s me… instead of Rain.”
“God,” Min buried his face into Se7en’s bare chest. “I can’t believe that you know about Rain. Did Yunho tell you?”
“Partly,” Se7en hedged. “I guessed about the whole thing, really. From what you said and things I overheard between you and the others. And I have to be honest with you, after you told me that someone hurt you, I asked someone to find out who it was for me.”
“Why did you do that?” There was an ember of anger in Min’s voice, subdued when Se7en gently kissed the space between his eyes.
“I found out it was Rain before he could find out anything.” The singer said. “And I guess I’m more like Yunho than I care to admit.”
“When I heard about what he’d done, I was so fucking pissed off.” Se7en admitted. “I wanted to hurt him and I was scared deep down inside that it was one of my friends. Because you deserved better than to be treated like something to discard when he was done. I fully acknowledge that I’m a protective bastard and I don’t like seeing my friends hurt. And you are, first and foremost, Minku, my friend.”
“What would you have done if you found out from this guy?” Min asked softly, his cheek pressed against the pillow.
“Probably wanted to go beat the shit out of Bi.” He said calmly. “I’m not saying I’m a good guy, Minku. I’m not perfect.”
“I think he would have treated me like your dance instructor did.” Whispering, Min looked down, feeling a brush of hot tears along his lashes. “Maybe not as bad but I think I wouldn’t have liked it.”
“All the more reason to pound the shit out of him.” Se7en agreed. “But apparently, someone got to it before I could. So, moot point. All I’ve got to ask is that if he ever touches you again, you let me know.”
“No,” Min shook his head, sniffing back his tears. “I’ve got to deal with things on my own. If I tell any of you about it, I’ll make you promise not to do anything about it first. I’m good at extracting promises beforehand.”
“I noticed you throwing Junsu to the wolves before we left.” Se7en grinned. “Strategic tactic?”
“Ah, I knew he’d be safe.” A snort dismissed any threat Junsu might have faced. “Yunnie wouldn’t do anything to him because of Jaejoong and Chunnie. It was a small revenge. I have better still hidden. He’ll know better about crossing me in the future or making fun of you. A small price to pay for future silence.”
“Ah my little Sun Tzu.” Se7en laughed, cuddling Min close. “Remind me not to leave my Blackberry where you could find it.”
“I would never blackmail you.” Changmin murmured, biting lightly into Se7en’s lower lip. “I have other ways of getting you to do what I want you to.”
“True,” Se7en replied, gifting Min with another kiss. “So very true.”
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Minku, I would think that there was something wrong with you if you didn’t ask questions.”
“Did you like it when I…” Changmin stumbled, his tongue refusing to comply with the words his mind was forcing onto it. “Um…”
“When you reciprocated?” Se7en moved his foot along Min’s ankle, brushing his toes on the younger man’s heel.
“Good word.” He nodded in agreement. “Yes, reciprocated. Did you mind? Or did you say you liked it because you didn’t want me to feel bad.”
“Honey, I liked it a lot.” A knowing grin lit up Se7en’s face, crinkling his eyes. “You didn’t believe me?”
“I just…” Min took in a deep breath. “You’re going to think I’m silly but I really only have Jaejoong and Yunho when I want to compare relationships. And well, my mom and our family. Junsu and Yoochun, you just can’t take them seriously.”
“You’re confusing me, Minku. What are you worried about?”
“”Yunho is very dominant.” He thought on it, thinking of the older members’ interactions. “And it just seems like when I did that to you, it crossed over into what you should be doing to me instead of what I should be doing to you.”
Se7en exhaled thoughtfully, his eyes unfocused as he gathered his thoughts. Clearing his throat, he took his time replying. Min shifted on the bed, impatient and wondering if he’d somehow insulted the older man or shouldn’t have spoken of it.
“Baby, I guess the problem is that you’re thinking of our relationship top and bottom or seme and uke.” There wasn’t any of the customary amusement in Se7en’s voice, more of a tenderness as he shared what was in his heart. “Yes, we are two halves of some kind of whole but I don’t like to say that I’m going to dominate you every single time we have sex.”
“There’s a problem, I think, when two guys love each other.” Se7en explained. “I think we’re conditioned to try to fit our relationship into the traditional roles of a man and a woman, where one guy basically is the object and the other is the receptacle. Because that’s pretty much how a heterosexual relationship works.”
“But see, Minku, we’re not women. Our sexual organs are different. And our needs are different. We may love or want other guys but we’re guys.” He laved Min’s mouth, feeling the softness of his lover’s lips. “I like both men and women. I like have sex with either and I don’t want to confine myself to the traditional masculine role of topping someone because I’m supposed to be the more masculine of the guy.”
“You expect me to…?” Min’s breath shortened. “I’ve never done that. I wouldn’t know how…”
“I’m not saying that we have to take turns or that it has to be this purely my turn-your turn thing.” Se7en explained. “I’m just telling you that if you want to, I’d like to. I don’t do that as often as I like probably because it takes a lot of trust on my part where my partner is concerned. I trust you, Minku and I think we can make it a pleasant experience for both of us but only if and when you’re ready.”
“Don’t constrict yourself to a role, baby.” The older man cautioned. “Don’t get caught up in what you think your position in bed should be. It can be what ever you want it to be. You’re a guy. You’re masculine. Don’t cheat yourself or try to shape yourself into something you think society wants just because you like having sex with men.”
“That’s hard to understand, Shichi.” Changmin’s mind wandered, crossing over boundaries he’d put up to help guide him along his relationship with the other man. “I… Jaejoong…”
“Jaejoong and Yunho have their relationship.” Se7en shrugged. “It’s theirs, for better or for worse. And maybe one day they’ll change how they love on another. And, baby, I understand how you thought that I might only want to make love to you and not be made love to. I get that. I’m just telling you, don’t worry about it and if ever you feel like you want to try it, I’m more than happy to let you. Hell, I’d love it. With your curiosity and enthusiasm, I think it would be a mind-blowing experience.”
“Just your mind?” Min teased, gently poking humour. “I liked doing it to other things too.”
“Oh that’s bad.” Se7en muttered, narrowing his eyes. “I think, that is so horrible, you should be punished for it.”
“Oh?” Min lifted an eyebrow, tilting his chin up in challenge. “What did you have in mind?”
“I was thinking,” Se7en kissed him soundly before pulling himself off the bed, grabbing a pair of sweats to pull on. “That you’re going to have to choke down my cooking…instead of other things that I think I’d prefer you to swallow. Come on, Minku. I’m hungry and you are going to need to keep your strength up. Can't have you wasting away when I've got plans for you and that delicious body of yours.”