wedspawn: Lavender Bunny Section Twenty (SMM Universe)
Title: Lavender Bunny (SMM Universe)
Section: Twenty
Pairing: Yoosu (Jaeho)
Section Rating: R
Overall Rating: NC-17
i still hold ranalore responsible for this mess.
yes, changmin will find someone. but not here. in his own fic. he's fine. in fact, he's more than fine ::::grins:::
Synopsis: A continuation of the relationship between Yoochun and Junsu from So Much Mine. Once again, hot pretty boys, music, dancing and sex. Not necessarily in that order.
Sections
One; Two; Three; Four; Five; Six; Seven; Eight; Nine; Ten; Eleven; Twelve; Thirteen; Fourteen; Fifteen; Sixteen; Seventeen; Eighteen; Nineteen
“A praying mantis?” Yoochun choked slightly on the water caught in his throat. “Where do you get this stuff?”
“First thing off the top of my head.” Hyukjae shrugged, leaning over to see the mark on Yoochun’s throat. “Man, he needs to eat more. He went to bed way too hungry by the looks of you.”
“Junsu eats…” Micky stopped short, leaning back on the couch. “You came here to poke at me.”
“Oh, I think Junsu should be doing the poking or…” Hyukjae pounded Yoochun’s back as another coughing fit rattled the singer’s chest. “Ah, Chunnie… you have to stop and breathe once in a while.”
“I think I’m going to leave you to Junsu.” Micky swigged a mouthful of water, hoping to get the rawness out of his throat. “He can deal with your nonsense. It’s too early in the morning for my brain.”
“He’s going to shower and it’s nearly noon... maybe even later.” Hyukjae reminded him. “You leave now and I’ll go hunting for Changmin to keep me company. And from the look on Junsu’s face, I’m guessing that’s not something he wants me to do.”
“Probably not.” Yoochun recalled the lascivious glances Hyukjae gave Min before the youngest was dragged off to the back of the house. “No talking about … let’s just talk.”
“Actually, how are you and Junsu doing?” The SuJu member pulled his feet up onto the couch, tucking them under him. “Really. I do get worried about my brother-in-sin.”
“Is that how you think about him?” Yoochun asked, mimicking Hyukjae’s posture, sliding his body to the side and facing the other singer. “Your brother-in-sin?”
“Mostly…” Hyukjae nodded, his voice softening. “Mostly I want him to be happy. I think that’s all brothers really want for each other. You make him… happy, I think. I can see it in his face.”
“He’s always happy. There’s always a smile on his face.” Yoochun cocked his head, a dorky grin creasing his mouth. It echoed the joy in Junsu’s that Hyukjae saw when he looked at his friend’s face. “But we’re doing okay. I think.”
“Why?” Yoochun asked, startled. “Did he say something?”
“No... no...” The other man waved off Yoochun’s alarm. “I was just checking up on you two. I wanted to see how you were doing... together. He told me you were making a go of it. It’s nice he found someone... even if it’s someone as innocent as you.”
“I am not innocent!” Micky scoffed, pushing lightly at Hyukjae’s shoulder. “We just are...I wasn’t expecting this thing with him.”
“No one does, really.” Hyukjae replied. “I keep waiting for the day when someone hits me upside the head and then I’ll fall too. I was kind of hoping it would be Jaejoong but sadly, I don’t think Yunho would share.”
“Oh he’d share.” Yoochun teased. “His fists. A cricket bat. Maybe a plate or two. But after that, no, I would say that sharing would be over then.”
“So if I’m going to poach anyone, it’ll have to be Max then.” Hyukjae contemplated the lithe youth he’d eyed earlier. There was a simmering wickedness just below the surface of guilelessness, a sulfurous fragment waiting to be ignited with the proper spark. “He’s too young though. I’ll have to wait a bit.”
“Don’t let him hear you say that.” Yoochun crowed. “He’ll be the first one to tell you he’s more than old enough to do anything the rest of us can do...or will do. He’s no child, our Changmin. Of course, Jaejoong is very protective of him too. You might have difficulties getting to Min behind him and Junsu.”
“I was always surprised that you and Jaejoong never...” Hyukjae leaned his head against the couch back, the streaks of crimson in his hair nearly blending with the red fabric. “You two seem really close.”
“BooJae and I are...” Yoochun struggled to put into words how he felt about the other singer. Their closeness had come about so quickly, the melting of Jae’s ice façade revealing the warm, silliness he shared with Micky nearly every day. “It’s like we’ve always known each other. He’s... a part of my soul.”
“And Junsu?” The SuJu member pressed lightly. The fondness in Yoochun’s voice for the other singer worried him, a warning tingle for Junsu’s heart flaring inside of his mind. “He’s not?”
“That’s a different part of my soul.” The baritone stared down at his feet, wondering how he could explain the light he saw every time he touched Junsu. “Susu-ah is... my mate. It’s like we’re a pair of shoes, matching but facing inwards to each other. You can’t wear only one shoe and go anywhere on a rocky path. To walk... to climb a mountain, you’ll need both. I can’t explain it well.”
“No.” Hyukjae said, patting his friend’s lover on the shoulder. “You did just fine, Chunnie-ah, just fine.”
“Let’s talk about the kids thing.” Jaejoong purred, staring at Yunho as the other blinked awake. The soft sheets over the leader’s body slithered over Yunho’s hips, drawn down by Jaejoong’s clenched fingers. The singer kissed at a spot on the other’s waist, licking at the jut of bone beneath the curve of Yunho’s hip.
“Hi. Pee. Have to pee.” Yunho yelped at the nip of teeth along the underside of his turgid shaft. “I love you Jae, but let me up.”
He scrambled free from the bed, glancing back at the sprawl of young man he left behind him. A corner of the silky gold sheets covered Jae’s thigh, the only part of his body hidden from view. Lying on his stomach, Jaejoong stretched his arms out, flexing the line of his shoulders before resting his chin on a clenched fist, his pale skin a shimmer against the bedding.
“Brush your teeth while you’re in there.” Jae muttered, his dark eyes a smoldered slant at Yunho’s retreating back. “So they’re clean when I kick them in.”
Children. The farthest thing from Jaejoong’s mind but obviously must closer to the surface of Yunho’s. Jae quirked his mouth, wondering at what point his lover became insane and how he didn’t even notice it happening. The rush of water came from the bathroom, a flush of a toilet followed by the stream of a faucet as Yunho scrubbed mint paste over his teeth. When he was done, Yunho climbed onto the bed, sinking his teeth into the rounded globe of Jae’s right buttock. The singer twisted slightly at the arrival of his lover, pouting playfully before his face grew serious.
“Kids.” The same flat tone Yunho heard last night resurfaced, making him wince. “When did…”
“I was just thinking out loud, Boo.” Yunho kissed the space between Jae’s shoulder blades, loving the taste of the young man on his mouth. “Rambling. You’re not the only one allowed to ramble.”
“Most people rambling don’t bring up children.” Jae remarked, rolling over onto his back and tucking against his lover’s side. “They bring up things like… vacations or even things they like to eat. Children...not usually the first thing that rolls off of someone’s tongue. And I don’t think it’s ever something that someone brings up when they’re explaining to their estranged mother that they love another man. Kids... two men in love. That’s not usually what’s connected there.”
“I guess it’s because… I see my life with you…forever. With everything I ever wanted as I grew old.” Yunho stroked at his lover’s soft face, tracing the curve of the other’s mouth. “I guess that just included children.”
“Aish.” Jae huffed his breath against Yunho’s hand. “I’m no one’s wife, Yunho. Don’t put me there… ”
“No, you’re not. I don’t think of you as a wife or a man who’s more feminine than masculine. I see you as much of a guy as I am, BooJae. ” Yunho brushed a kiss against Jae’s mouth. “And I’m not saying that we’re going to live in some house while you cook and I go to work, leaving you to raise the children. That’s not our lives, Boo. It could be our lives if we want it but only if we both want it.”
“I don’t want that to be my life, Yunho. I’m not good at family. I can’t even keep my family loving me. How am I supposed to...” Jae’s forehead creased. “I don’t want to lose you over something like this.”
“Jaejoong, you are not going to lose me.” The leader growled at his lover, baring his teeth in a mock threat. “We both are so young and neither of us knows where this life we lead is going to take us. We could be living like this for the next twenty years or just the next three. None of us knows. That’s not going to change... us. I guess I am looking at when we both are done being... U-Know and Hero and just Kim-Jung Yunho and Jaejoong.”
“Kim-Jung?” Jae wrinkled his nose. “You think a lot about these kinds of things. Or are you rambling there too?”
“No, I think about it.” Yunho admitted. “I wonder if some day we’re going to own a house on the beach or maybe in the mountains and every morning when I wake up, you’re there asleep next to me and the most important decision that we have to make that day is what to eat for dinner. I want you to be able to see that future, baby.”
“I don’t think your heart has accepted that we’re going to be doing those things...ten or fifteen years from now. I know you love me and that you’ve given me every bit of your heart and soul.” The young man slipped his arm tightly over his lover’s waist, kissing the curve of Jaejoong’s shoulder. “And it’s not because you think that I’m going to leave you or that we won’t last.
“I believe it’s because you’ve spent so much of your life living from moment to moment, thinking about where your next meal is...where you are going to get enough money to have something to wear for auditions or even just where you’re going to sleep that night... that you forget how to live for the future.” Yunho still could clearly see the street urchin their managers thought had been groomed out of Jaejoong. The leader knew that piece of Jae merely stalked beneath a more polished surface, always on the ready to bare his teeth when threatened. “I want to give you that future, baby. With me in it.”
“No matter what future we live in, I won’t be a good father, Yunnie.” The singer shook his head. “You, I can see you raising children but me?”
“Oh no, baby.” Yunho pressed his fingers against Jae’s mouth. “We do this forever thing together. And you’ll be a great father… your heart is larger. You’re a better lover than I am.”
Jae’s smirk brewed an impish look in his eyes. “Neither one of us knows what we’re doing. How can I be a better lover?”
“My body tells me you do fine with the physical love, baby. God help me if ever you know what you’re doing. I don’t think I could survive it.” Yunho’s grin grew goofy at Jaejoong’s grimace. “I meant… emotionally. You love better than I do. More openly. Freely. You always seem to know the right thing to say or do to make me feel… better or comforted.”
“That’s because loving you is easy, baby.” Jae whispered, purring softly at the touch of Yunho’s hand along his belly.
“I’m glad you were there… for me when my mother…I’m glad you were there for me. So we could heal and she... so I can have her back in my life.” The leader bent over, kissing at the wink of a shadow hidden in Jaejoong’s navel. “I wouldn’t have listened to her. I would have taken the pride I’d gotten from my father and thrown her words back into her face. You’re the one between us that stops and listens where I will try to shove my way through. If anything, you teach me how to love... better. I want to be a better man for you.”
“You’re fine the way you are.” Jaejoong grumbled at his lover, brushing back the hair on Yunho’s forehead when the young man looked up at him from his spot on Jae’s stomach. “I love you... no matter how you grow or change. I’ll always love you.”
“I love you too, Boo.” Yunho kissed Jae’s chest, licking at the other’s breastbone as he slithered along the sheets. “I’m going to hold you to that promise, Jaejoong. No matter what happens, I expect to see you here, right next to me. Always.”
“Weren’t you just in love with me yesterday?” Junsu pushed at the youngest member of their group, lightly guiding Changmin towards the back bedroom. “What happened between yesterday and today?”
“What?” Min made a face, rubbing at his arm where Junsu’s hand had been. “Before I wasn’t good enough and now you’re taking me into your bedroom? Yoochun isn’t enough for you? And nothing happened... to me. Yoochun! He happened to you and it wasn’t just yesterday!”
“Aish, shut up.” The tenor whacked Changmin lightly on the head with the end of his towel, pointing him towards the bed. “Go sit down. I want to talk to you about Hyukjae before you get in over your head, Minnie-ah.”
“Didn’t we already have these kinds of discussions?” Min picked up the forlorn bunny resting on Junsu’s pillows, trying to ignore the single sleeping surface that now dominated the side of the wall. Just a tingling ache remained, a burr lost under the irritation of being treated like a child once again. “I’m not...”
“I’m not calling you a kid.” Junsu remarked, settling down on the edge of the mattress. “I really did want to talk to you about Hyukjae and maybe even others.”
“I don’t need a talk, Junnie-ah.” Changmin leaned back on his hands, the plush rabbit forgotten. “Remember, unlike the four of you... I read. I know what to expect.”
“Reading is different than real life, Min.” The tenor said. “And I promised Jaejoong that I’d be careful with you...and your feelings. I think that extends to dealing with men like Hyukjae.”
“My feelings are fine.” The youth replied. He grinned lightly at Junsu’s discomfort. “Are you really worried about Hyukjae? Is your friend that bad?”
“No...” Junsu thought then responded. “Yes. I love Hyuki-ah. He’s my best friend, nearly as much of a brother to me as my twin but I know him. He’s interested in having fun.”
“You seem to think that I want more than that.” Changmin asked thoughtfully. He chewed on his lower lip, regarding the older man with a curious stare. “I’ve watched the four of you and I decided that it’s a bad thing to enter into a serious relationship knowing next to nothing about how love or sex works. All it seems to do is tangle things up. Wouldn’t you have rather spend your beginning moments with Yoochun just enjoying being with him instead of wondering whose dick is going to go where first?”
“Changmin!” The singer exclaimed. “Ah, Hyukjae is already a bad influence on you!”
“No, hyung.” Min shook his head, smiling at the other man’s shock. “The four of you have been. I hear your whispers and the wondering if you’re doing things right. I’d rather have all that experience and then fall in love. Wouldn’t that be more logical?”
“Not everything is logic, Minnie-ah.” Junsu sighed, rubbing at his face. “Sometimes, it’s... damn it. Look, I spent a lot of time... with Hyukjae... experimenting... learning a few things but honestly, it just felt so different with Yoochun and not just because it was another body.”
“It’s sweeter. Having those feelings when you’re... doing things. It just... feels more right. Everything else is just... physical. And you’ll regret... damn it, Min.” Junsu sent a silent curse to Yunho, knowing the older man had to have wished this revenge on him. “I just don’t think you’d get that from Hyukjae.”
“I’m not looking for sweet from Hyukjae... or anyone else for that matter.” Changmin said. “It still hurts to see you and Yoochun together. Not a lot but still, enough that it aches a little bit in my heart. I don’t want to feel that anymore, Junsu and what I decide to do with that little pain... might be with Hyukjae or might not be.”
“Just... God, why Hyukjae?” The tenor winced. As much as he loved his friend, the young man was the definition of a player, walking away from assignations looking for the next tidbit of sweet to suckle on. “Just... he’s not someone to fall in love with, Minnie.”
“Hyukjae is really not at the top of my list. Shiwon has already asked me if I wanted to ... do something with him and I’m not... adverse to that. Maybe not tomorrow but soon. After I stop hurting whenever I see you touch him or hear you two laugh.” Changmin sighed, patting the older man on the leg. “Shiwon or someone else might be just what I need to heal that. I’m not looking to fall in love, Susu-ah. I’m looking to fall out of it.”
Section: Twenty
Pairing: Yoosu (Jaeho)
Section Rating: R
Overall Rating: NC-17
i still hold ranalore responsible for this mess.
yes, changmin will find someone. but not here. in his own fic. he's fine. in fact, he's more than fine ::::grins:::
Synopsis: A continuation of the relationship between Yoochun and Junsu from So Much Mine. Once again, hot pretty boys, music, dancing and sex. Not necessarily in that order.
Sections
One; Two; Three; Four; Five; Six; Seven; Eight; Nine; Ten; Eleven; Twelve; Thirteen; Fourteen; Fifteen; Sixteen; Seventeen; Eighteen; Nineteen
“A praying mantis?” Yoochun choked slightly on the water caught in his throat. “Where do you get this stuff?”
“First thing off the top of my head.” Hyukjae shrugged, leaning over to see the mark on Yoochun’s throat. “Man, he needs to eat more. He went to bed way too hungry by the looks of you.”
“Junsu eats…” Micky stopped short, leaning back on the couch. “You came here to poke at me.”
“Oh, I think Junsu should be doing the poking or…” Hyukjae pounded Yoochun’s back as another coughing fit rattled the singer’s chest. “Ah, Chunnie… you have to stop and breathe once in a while.”
“I think I’m going to leave you to Junsu.” Micky swigged a mouthful of water, hoping to get the rawness out of his throat. “He can deal with your nonsense. It’s too early in the morning for my brain.”
“He’s going to shower and it’s nearly noon... maybe even later.” Hyukjae reminded him. “You leave now and I’ll go hunting for Changmin to keep me company. And from the look on Junsu’s face, I’m guessing that’s not something he wants me to do.”
“Probably not.” Yoochun recalled the lascivious glances Hyukjae gave Min before the youngest was dragged off to the back of the house. “No talking about … let’s just talk.”
“Actually, how are you and Junsu doing?” The SuJu member pulled his feet up onto the couch, tucking them under him. “Really. I do get worried about my brother-in-sin.”
“Is that how you think about him?” Yoochun asked, mimicking Hyukjae’s posture, sliding his body to the side and facing the other singer. “Your brother-in-sin?”
“Mostly…” Hyukjae nodded, his voice softening. “Mostly I want him to be happy. I think that’s all brothers really want for each other. You make him… happy, I think. I can see it in his face.”
“He’s always happy. There’s always a smile on his face.” Yoochun cocked his head, a dorky grin creasing his mouth. It echoed the joy in Junsu’s that Hyukjae saw when he looked at his friend’s face. “But we’re doing okay. I think.”
“Why?” Yoochun asked, startled. “Did he say something?”
“No... no...” The other man waved off Yoochun’s alarm. “I was just checking up on you two. I wanted to see how you were doing... together. He told me you were making a go of it. It’s nice he found someone... even if it’s someone as innocent as you.”
“I am not innocent!” Micky scoffed, pushing lightly at Hyukjae’s shoulder. “We just are...I wasn’t expecting this thing with him.”
“No one does, really.” Hyukjae replied. “I keep waiting for the day when someone hits me upside the head and then I’ll fall too. I was kind of hoping it would be Jaejoong but sadly, I don’t think Yunho would share.”
“Oh he’d share.” Yoochun teased. “His fists. A cricket bat. Maybe a plate or two. But after that, no, I would say that sharing would be over then.”
“So if I’m going to poach anyone, it’ll have to be Max then.” Hyukjae contemplated the lithe youth he’d eyed earlier. There was a simmering wickedness just below the surface of guilelessness, a sulfurous fragment waiting to be ignited with the proper spark. “He’s too young though. I’ll have to wait a bit.”
“Don’t let him hear you say that.” Yoochun crowed. “He’ll be the first one to tell you he’s more than old enough to do anything the rest of us can do...or will do. He’s no child, our Changmin. Of course, Jaejoong is very protective of him too. You might have difficulties getting to Min behind him and Junsu.”
“I was always surprised that you and Jaejoong never...” Hyukjae leaned his head against the couch back, the streaks of crimson in his hair nearly blending with the red fabric. “You two seem really close.”
“BooJae and I are...” Yoochun struggled to put into words how he felt about the other singer. Their closeness had come about so quickly, the melting of Jae’s ice façade revealing the warm, silliness he shared with Micky nearly every day. “It’s like we’ve always known each other. He’s... a part of my soul.”
“And Junsu?” The SuJu member pressed lightly. The fondness in Yoochun’s voice for the other singer worried him, a warning tingle for Junsu’s heart flaring inside of his mind. “He’s not?”
“That’s a different part of my soul.” The baritone stared down at his feet, wondering how he could explain the light he saw every time he touched Junsu. “Susu-ah is... my mate. It’s like we’re a pair of shoes, matching but facing inwards to each other. You can’t wear only one shoe and go anywhere on a rocky path. To walk... to climb a mountain, you’ll need both. I can’t explain it well.”
“No.” Hyukjae said, patting his friend’s lover on the shoulder. “You did just fine, Chunnie-ah, just fine.”
“Let’s talk about the kids thing.” Jaejoong purred, staring at Yunho as the other blinked awake. The soft sheets over the leader’s body slithered over Yunho’s hips, drawn down by Jaejoong’s clenched fingers. The singer kissed at a spot on the other’s waist, licking at the jut of bone beneath the curve of Yunho’s hip.
“Hi. Pee. Have to pee.” Yunho yelped at the nip of teeth along the underside of his turgid shaft. “I love you Jae, but let me up.”
He scrambled free from the bed, glancing back at the sprawl of young man he left behind him. A corner of the silky gold sheets covered Jae’s thigh, the only part of his body hidden from view. Lying on his stomach, Jaejoong stretched his arms out, flexing the line of his shoulders before resting his chin on a clenched fist, his pale skin a shimmer against the bedding.
“Brush your teeth while you’re in there.” Jae muttered, his dark eyes a smoldered slant at Yunho’s retreating back. “So they’re clean when I kick them in.”
Children. The farthest thing from Jaejoong’s mind but obviously must closer to the surface of Yunho’s. Jae quirked his mouth, wondering at what point his lover became insane and how he didn’t even notice it happening. The rush of water came from the bathroom, a flush of a toilet followed by the stream of a faucet as Yunho scrubbed mint paste over his teeth. When he was done, Yunho climbed onto the bed, sinking his teeth into the rounded globe of Jae’s right buttock. The singer twisted slightly at the arrival of his lover, pouting playfully before his face grew serious.
“Kids.” The same flat tone Yunho heard last night resurfaced, making him wince. “When did…”
“I was just thinking out loud, Boo.” Yunho kissed the space between Jae’s shoulder blades, loving the taste of the young man on his mouth. “Rambling. You’re not the only one allowed to ramble.”
“Most people rambling don’t bring up children.” Jae remarked, rolling over onto his back and tucking against his lover’s side. “They bring up things like… vacations or even things they like to eat. Children...not usually the first thing that rolls off of someone’s tongue. And I don’t think it’s ever something that someone brings up when they’re explaining to their estranged mother that they love another man. Kids... two men in love. That’s not usually what’s connected there.”
“I guess it’s because… I see my life with you…forever. With everything I ever wanted as I grew old.” Yunho stroked at his lover’s soft face, tracing the curve of the other’s mouth. “I guess that just included children.”
“Aish.” Jae huffed his breath against Yunho’s hand. “I’m no one’s wife, Yunho. Don’t put me there… ”
“No, you’re not. I don’t think of you as a wife or a man who’s more feminine than masculine. I see you as much of a guy as I am, BooJae. ” Yunho brushed a kiss against Jae’s mouth. “And I’m not saying that we’re going to live in some house while you cook and I go to work, leaving you to raise the children. That’s not our lives, Boo. It could be our lives if we want it but only if we both want it.”
“I don’t want that to be my life, Yunho. I’m not good at family. I can’t even keep my family loving me. How am I supposed to...” Jae’s forehead creased. “I don’t want to lose you over something like this.”
“Jaejoong, you are not going to lose me.” The leader growled at his lover, baring his teeth in a mock threat. “We both are so young and neither of us knows where this life we lead is going to take us. We could be living like this for the next twenty years or just the next three. None of us knows. That’s not going to change... us. I guess I am looking at when we both are done being... U-Know and Hero and just Kim-Jung Yunho and Jaejoong.”
“Kim-Jung?” Jae wrinkled his nose. “You think a lot about these kinds of things. Or are you rambling there too?”
“No, I think about it.” Yunho admitted. “I wonder if some day we’re going to own a house on the beach or maybe in the mountains and every morning when I wake up, you’re there asleep next to me and the most important decision that we have to make that day is what to eat for dinner. I want you to be able to see that future, baby.”
“I don’t think your heart has accepted that we’re going to be doing those things...ten or fifteen years from now. I know you love me and that you’ve given me every bit of your heart and soul.” The young man slipped his arm tightly over his lover’s waist, kissing the curve of Jaejoong’s shoulder. “And it’s not because you think that I’m going to leave you or that we won’t last.
“I believe it’s because you’ve spent so much of your life living from moment to moment, thinking about where your next meal is...where you are going to get enough money to have something to wear for auditions or even just where you’re going to sleep that night... that you forget how to live for the future.” Yunho still could clearly see the street urchin their managers thought had been groomed out of Jaejoong. The leader knew that piece of Jae merely stalked beneath a more polished surface, always on the ready to bare his teeth when threatened. “I want to give you that future, baby. With me in it.”
“No matter what future we live in, I won’t be a good father, Yunnie.” The singer shook his head. “You, I can see you raising children but me?”
“Oh no, baby.” Yunho pressed his fingers against Jae’s mouth. “We do this forever thing together. And you’ll be a great father… your heart is larger. You’re a better lover than I am.”
Jae’s smirk brewed an impish look in his eyes. “Neither one of us knows what we’re doing. How can I be a better lover?”
“My body tells me you do fine with the physical love, baby. God help me if ever you know what you’re doing. I don’t think I could survive it.” Yunho’s grin grew goofy at Jaejoong’s grimace. “I meant… emotionally. You love better than I do. More openly. Freely. You always seem to know the right thing to say or do to make me feel… better or comforted.”
“That’s because loving you is easy, baby.” Jae whispered, purring softly at the touch of Yunho’s hand along his belly.
“I’m glad you were there… for me when my mother…I’m glad you were there for me. So we could heal and she... so I can have her back in my life.” The leader bent over, kissing at the wink of a shadow hidden in Jaejoong’s navel. “I wouldn’t have listened to her. I would have taken the pride I’d gotten from my father and thrown her words back into her face. You’re the one between us that stops and listens where I will try to shove my way through. If anything, you teach me how to love... better. I want to be a better man for you.”
“You’re fine the way you are.” Jaejoong grumbled at his lover, brushing back the hair on Yunho’s forehead when the young man looked up at him from his spot on Jae’s stomach. “I love you... no matter how you grow or change. I’ll always love you.”
“I love you too, Boo.” Yunho kissed Jae’s chest, licking at the other’s breastbone as he slithered along the sheets. “I’m going to hold you to that promise, Jaejoong. No matter what happens, I expect to see you here, right next to me. Always.”
“Weren’t you just in love with me yesterday?” Junsu pushed at the youngest member of their group, lightly guiding Changmin towards the back bedroom. “What happened between yesterday and today?”
“What?” Min made a face, rubbing at his arm where Junsu’s hand had been. “Before I wasn’t good enough and now you’re taking me into your bedroom? Yoochun isn’t enough for you? And nothing happened... to me. Yoochun! He happened to you and it wasn’t just yesterday!”
“Aish, shut up.” The tenor whacked Changmin lightly on the head with the end of his towel, pointing him towards the bed. “Go sit down. I want to talk to you about Hyukjae before you get in over your head, Minnie-ah.”
“Didn’t we already have these kinds of discussions?” Min picked up the forlorn bunny resting on Junsu’s pillows, trying to ignore the single sleeping surface that now dominated the side of the wall. Just a tingling ache remained, a burr lost under the irritation of being treated like a child once again. “I’m not...”
“I’m not calling you a kid.” Junsu remarked, settling down on the edge of the mattress. “I really did want to talk to you about Hyukjae and maybe even others.”
“I don’t need a talk, Junnie-ah.” Changmin leaned back on his hands, the plush rabbit forgotten. “Remember, unlike the four of you... I read. I know what to expect.”
“Reading is different than real life, Min.” The tenor said. “And I promised Jaejoong that I’d be careful with you...and your feelings. I think that extends to dealing with men like Hyukjae.”
“My feelings are fine.” The youth replied. He grinned lightly at Junsu’s discomfort. “Are you really worried about Hyukjae? Is your friend that bad?”
“No...” Junsu thought then responded. “Yes. I love Hyuki-ah. He’s my best friend, nearly as much of a brother to me as my twin but I know him. He’s interested in having fun.”
“You seem to think that I want more than that.” Changmin asked thoughtfully. He chewed on his lower lip, regarding the older man with a curious stare. “I’ve watched the four of you and I decided that it’s a bad thing to enter into a serious relationship knowing next to nothing about how love or sex works. All it seems to do is tangle things up. Wouldn’t you have rather spend your beginning moments with Yoochun just enjoying being with him instead of wondering whose dick is going to go where first?”
“Changmin!” The singer exclaimed. “Ah, Hyukjae is already a bad influence on you!”
“No, hyung.” Min shook his head, smiling at the other man’s shock. “The four of you have been. I hear your whispers and the wondering if you’re doing things right. I’d rather have all that experience and then fall in love. Wouldn’t that be more logical?”
“Not everything is logic, Minnie-ah.” Junsu sighed, rubbing at his face. “Sometimes, it’s... damn it. Look, I spent a lot of time... with Hyukjae... experimenting... learning a few things but honestly, it just felt so different with Yoochun and not just because it was another body.”
“It’s sweeter. Having those feelings when you’re... doing things. It just... feels more right. Everything else is just... physical. And you’ll regret... damn it, Min.” Junsu sent a silent curse to Yunho, knowing the older man had to have wished this revenge on him. “I just don’t think you’d get that from Hyukjae.”
“I’m not looking for sweet from Hyukjae... or anyone else for that matter.” Changmin said. “It still hurts to see you and Yoochun together. Not a lot but still, enough that it aches a little bit in my heart. I don’t want to feel that anymore, Junsu and what I decide to do with that little pain... might be with Hyukjae or might not be.”
“Just... God, why Hyukjae?” The tenor winced. As much as he loved his friend, the young man was the definition of a player, walking away from assignations looking for the next tidbit of sweet to suckle on. “Just... he’s not someone to fall in love with, Minnie.”
“Hyukjae is really not at the top of my list. Shiwon has already asked me if I wanted to ... do something with him and I’m not... adverse to that. Maybe not tomorrow but soon. After I stop hurting whenever I see you touch him or hear you two laugh.” Changmin sighed, patting the older man on the leg. “Shiwon or someone else might be just what I need to heal that. I’m not looking to fall in love, Susu-ah. I’m looking to fall out of it.”