I need help with some invitation wording.

[ladydelaidra]

It's a small thing I'm needing help with.

FH and I don't drink and we can't afford to do an open bar for our reception. Cue the CASH BAR. (Dun dun DUUUUN!) I know some people find it tacky, but I consulted a few family members who assured me they would be fine with paying for their drinks instead of us having a dry reception.

Anywho, what I'd like

Comments

[oh_muffy]

Just wanted to say I loveeee that song ^_^

[reach_the_end]

I don't think you should put it on the invites, but you may want to "spread the word" when you're talking to those who will be attending so that they know to bring cash if they want to drink.

Honestly, why is a cash bar considered tacky? I don't get it. We can't afford alcohol so we're just having a dry reception.

[ladydelaidra]

That sounds like a good idea. Thanks! :)

And honestly, I don't think it is. My family and close friends seem to be cool with it, but some people do the, 'O-oh! That's...nice!' when I mention it in conversation, so I just wanted another opinion before proceeding. ^^;

[roseofjuly]

People have always been squeamish about money, and particularly in Western society there seems to have arisen this culture that believes that a bride and groom should spare no money having a lavish affair. Which is absolutely fine! - if that's what they want to do. But because of that generally people have come to believe that you shouldn't mention anything that has to do with money on basically any wedding correspondence - cash bar, where you're registered for gifts, etc. It's a little silly because everyone wants to know these things; etiquette says you 'can't' put it on the invite so one is often stuck spreading the information by 'word of mouth,' which inevitably misses somebody who doesn't know what's going on.

[grinnellian2001]

To answer reach_the_end's question: The reason a cash bar is considered tacky is because it is your (or your parents, or all of the above, or whoever is hosting your reception) responsibility as host/ess to pay for the refreshments served to your guests. This is not just wedding etiquette, but general etiquette for life. The most gracious thing to do is host the reception you can afford for all the people you want to invite (and if that means a dry reception or even just punch and cookies at 2pm, so be it) rather than setting up something you can't afford (full bar) and expecting people to pay for it themselves. (To give you a hypothetical that will sound ridiculous but is really quite similar: would you charge people $20 each to be in a photograph with you so that you could afford a more expensive wedding photographer than you could otherwise book

[roseofjuly]

Last time we had a bride having a cash bar at the rehearsal dinner and a lot of people thought that even though it's widely considered "tacky," noting it on the invite may be a good idea because it gets the word out without you having to rely on word of mouth. Then people know to bring cash or other forms of legal tender.

I think it depends on your crowd. I know personally were I to get an invitation that said 'cash bar' I wouldn't think "OMG tacky!" I'd think "Oh, guess I should bring money if I need to get drinks." Simple. I think you can put it if you don't have any extremely socially conservative people on your guest list - I've heard you can put 'no-host bar' to make you feel better but honestly I had no idea what that meant until yesterday, and if someone put it on the invite I wouldn't know what it meant.

[ladydelaidra]

Thanks for the advice. :)

And icon love~~ <333

[triple10wedding]

This, with the insert!

Probably the easiest way to avoid having something stand out on the actual invite..

Otherwise, I'd try to let people know by word-of-mouth.

[slave2tehtink]

I am afraid I am no help with wording, but I *love* the typeface she used for your names... do you happen to know what it is?

[ladydelaidra]

It's called Fancy Pens. :)

[slave2tehtink]

I am totally going to have to steal it for my invites, which I'm making myself. that is such an amazingly fantastic font.