I love the way we communicate

[hybrid_element]

The following is a conversation my FH and I had about a week ago. (Reminder: Our wedding isn't until Oct. 11, 2009...)

FH: "So when are you coming home?"
Me: "I have a lia sophia show tonight, so I won't be home until 10:30 or 11."
FH:  "Aaaaaawww!"
Me: "I told you about this -- you knew this when you married me!"
FH: "When did we get married?"
Me: "You

Comments

[in_vino_vanitas]

i'm catholic, too, but not very. i think she was within her rights to ask about the jesus thing. anything from the old testament would be less polarizing.

[hybrid_element]

Thanks, I can see your point but have to respectfully disagree. I'm not trying to polarize the ceremony at all, but rather have a clear cut nod to both the Jewish and Catholic faiths to appease the parents.

I purposely chose something out of the New Testament to differentiate the Catholic part from the Jewish part. I see reading out of the Old Testament as giving 1 1/2 nods to the Jews and only 1/2 to the Catholics, if that makes sense.

Plus I don't see how mentioning Jesus (which the reading doesn't, btw) would make his family any less comfortable than a glass breaking ceremony would make mine. It's a very fine line we're walking here. =)

[in_vino_vanitas]

i don't think jesus and the glass breaking ceremony are on the same level - the destruction of the temple in jerusalem isn't something catholics deny. you have a right to use the reading, but she isn't being unreasonable by asking. i'm also marrying a jewish person, and we will have jesus mentioned several times. we talked to both sets of parents about it at length. life is easier when you can avoid touchy subjects like religion, but i don't think we have that luxury.

[somethingpoetic]

As someone who's Jewish myself (albeit really only in the cultural sense...I didn't have a bat mitzvah, I can't remember the last time I was in a temple), can understand MIL's concerns. I went to Catholic school for 8 years (high school and undergrad college), and while FH and I put a few general mentions of "God" in our ceremony, I asked for and got an OK from him and his parents to not include Jesus in our ceremony. Granted, FH is even less religious than I am, and his parents haven't been churchgoers for years, so the situation wasn't really stressful. I just don't want something out of line with my beliefs included in the ceremony. Since it's a civil ceremony, your MIL probably also feels a little awkward about it.

That said, its your wedding, not hers, and you're entitled to put together whatever ceremony you want with whatever wording you want. I think the reading from Corinthians is a good New Testament choice, like you said, because it doesn't actually even mention Jesus :)

[drblkcrab]

All I can add is good luck with that fine line :)
My family is mainly catholic and my husband's side is 1/2 catholic and 1/2 atheist or agnostic types. During our ceremony there was no mention of anything beyond a general reference to a higher power since the SO and I are agnostic :)

[da_shpoon]

That reminds me of the time that my (cleaner) husband commented "well, you married a cleaner!" (after telling me off about my (lack of?) mess-cleaning skills). We weren't even engaged at that point & as I was only 20 at the time, I clearly had never been married before!

[hybrid_element]

Aaw, so cute!

[barebonedcrazy]

yay lia sophia!

[1983]

that was going to be my comment. :-p

[wingsonmyfeet]

The last few lines of your journal made me laugh, because I feel the exact same way! When my FILs get very pushy about what they want or what they DON'T want at the wedding, it makes me go the complete opposite which is usually exactly what we want. :)

Good luck to you guys!

[hybrid_element]

Hahaha, thanks. I'm pretty much kidding about the Jesus references, but FH and I have decided not to tell her any more details about the ceremony, since she's clearly so strongly opinionated about how she wants it to be. =)