[And 00 will be waiting at home, after giving the house a clean so that it'll be nice for Kagerou. With Fred absent, 00 has let their shared bedroom get rather messy >> ]
[Kagerou bustles in the door with some haste, the carton of ice cream wrapped against melting best as she could manage. As soon as it's deposited on the table, she quite matter-of-factly turns to her friend and gives her a quick, tight hug.
Hugs are good, when you haven't seen someone in a while.]
Hello. I think we'd best start with the ice cream, unless you prefer yours melted.
[00 hugs back. She's happy to see Kagerou, but she also wonders if there's another motive to this visit besides sharing company. Ice cream is a food for comfort.
But Kagerou has a valid concern, so when 00 disengages she quickly fetches bowls, spoons, and scoop.]
[This time, the ice cream isn't strictly for comfort: while Kagerou knows 00 analyses everything, she has brought the ice cream mostly because good things are even better when shared with friends, and there aren't that many of her friends who will share in her odd culinary choices without complaint.
She finds a chair to sit in as they finally have bowls of only slightly melted ice cream in front of them. She does have a small, undercover intention to bring up something more serious. It can wait a little.]
So, um, how are you doing? Is Fred back yet? I'm sorry I haven't been over. It got a little bit busy towards the end of June.
Fred is still trapped in the elevator. [00 stares at the ice cream when she says that. It's been some time now. Fred's absence has become... it is not normal. But it has ceased to be unusual. 00 isn't sure that's a good thing.] Her journal still functions as normal.
[She looks up at Kagerou.] You don't need to apologize.
[Her smile falls at the soft dejected note in 00's voice.] Then she's coming back. Sometimes it just takes an awfully long while. Or maybe she... found someplace really interesting? She does seem the sort that would love that sort of thing. Exploring.
[Now, the apology is in her eyes rather than her words.] I'm babbling. But she will be home. I mean, the places we visit on the Fourth Floor aren't... properly home. Not really.
Innovator disappeared while trapped in the elevator. [She wonders immediately if she should have said that. Kagerou was trying to be reassuring, make her feel better. But the fact still remains.
She takes a bite of ice cream. The cold feels good.]
But the pattern shows that she is more likely to return.
I know. [There's no use lying about it.] But the odds are still in Fred's favour. And by a lot. [She swallows a spoonful of ice cream and offers a tentative smile.
[Kagerou shifts, trying to settle on the chair.] Did you... Do you remember the person who was writing in the journal some time ago? Asking us to stop, well, riling the Tree up? You... told them that you thought of the Sphere as home.
[00 doesn't return the smile, but she does nod. She will continue hoping for Fred's return.
When Kagerou changes the subject, 00 pauses in the act of getting another bite of ice cream. She does not think she could forget that entry and the conversation unless she was forced to.]
[00 looks up at Kagerou. Then she stares intently at the table, remembering Stellaris--how unhappy they both were to know that the other had died, even if it was an experience they'd shared.
Is there a gentler way to say it? Different words, euphemisms and vagueness... no. It would not work.]
[It's just the same as Axel, Kagerou reminds herself sharply, just like Axel. Sometimes, people end up here after their deaths. She knows that. They can't help it. She can't be upset. Still, her hands tighten around the bowl of ice cream. It's cold against her skin.]
I... understand. I really do. I mean, the whole being dead part. You're not the first person who's told me that.
[The last words fall from her mouth in a rush, but then she stills, breathes, begins again.]
[For a moment, Kagerou can only stare at her friend's bowed head. The words of the clones, eerily like 00 and still somehow wrong, float back to her, as does her own panicked, defiant answer to them.]
Of course you are. [Her voice drops, but she has to ask.] What... what does that even mean, that you could not be real?
[00 hesitates. What does it mean? The clones had said she was only pretending to be a person. She asked Veda about reality as well. But it isn't something that is easily defined. Feeling and saying are two different things.
So it takes her a moment to answer. She takes a bite of ice cream. Real.]
My existence has meaning for you, and for others. [Her voice grows quieter.] We care about each other.
[The thought of such loneliness that it could make you doubt your own existence sends a chill snaking down Kagerou's spine. Suddenly, the ice cream doesn't seem so appetising anymore.]
You... wouldn't be real without other people? I mean, of course we all need someone who cares about us, and... I'm not sure how I would even cope without anyone at all, but...
[And 00 will be waiting at home, after giving the house a clean so that it'll be nice for Kagerou. With Fred absent, 00 has let their shared bedroom get rather messy >> ]
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Hugs are good, when you haven't seen someone in a while.]
Hello. I think we'd best start with the ice cream, unless you prefer yours melted.
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But Kagerou has a valid concern, so when 00 disengages she quickly fetches bowls, spoons, and scoop.]
I agree.
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She finds a chair to sit in as they finally have bowls of only slightly melted ice cream in front of them. She does have a small, undercover intention to bring up something more serious. It can wait a little.]
So, um, how are you doing? Is Fred back yet? I'm sorry I haven't been over. It got a little bit busy towards the end of June.
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[She looks up at Kagerou.] You don't need to apologize.
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[Her smile falls at the soft dejected note in 00's voice.] Then she's coming back. Sometimes it just takes an awfully long while. Or maybe she... found someplace really interesting? She does seem the sort that would love that sort of thing. Exploring.
[Now, the apology is in her eyes rather than her words.] I'm babbling. But she will be home. I mean, the places we visit on the Fourth Floor aren't... properly home. Not really.
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She takes a bite of ice cream. The cold feels good.]
But the pattern shows that she is more likely to return.
[That is also a fact.]
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[Kagerou shifts, trying to settle on the chair.] Did you... Do you remember the person who was writing in the journal some time ago? Asking us to stop, well, riling the Tree up? You... told them that you thought of the Sphere as home.
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When Kagerou changes the subject, 00 pauses in the act of getting another bite of ice cream. She does not think she could forget that entry and the conversation unless she was forced to.]
Yes. I remember.
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Is there a gentler way to say it? Different words, euphemisms and vagueness... no. It would not work.]
I died. But that is only one reason.
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I... understand. I really do. I mean, the whole being dead part. You're not the first person who's told me that.
[The last words fall from her mouth in a rush, but then she stills, breathes, begins again.]
So... can I ask about the other reasons?
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She stares at the ice cream for a while more.]
I have family and friends. I... am real, in Edensphere.
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Of course you are. [Her voice drops, but she has to ask.] What... what does that even mean, that you could not be real?
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So it takes her a moment to answer. She takes a bite of ice cream. Real.]
My existence has meaning for you, and for others. [Her voice grows quieter.] We care about each other.
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You... wouldn't be real without other people? I mean, of course we all need someone who cares about us, and... I'm not sure how I would even cope without anyone at all, but...
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