00 ⁂ OOC: Memory Crystal #5: Sound/Touch
She stood somewhere cold and spacious. There was no sight, no smell, but the distant sound of wind somewhere, muffled by walls or windows. She could feel parched, dusty air in her throat, fine, smooth fabric hugging her body, cinched into close-fitting sleeves, trailing down in the bodice of a dress. All was quiet; the minute tactile details occupied her for a moment. Her body was tense, wary, braced. She had tilted her head back to look at something the memory's lack of senses kept from her. Her heart thrummed, a caged bird beating for freedom or for death.
A door sounded behind her.
"I'm coming in."
(Kagerou wanted to flinch. She knew that voice. It was the pallid, horn-masked man with the gaping hole through the base of his throat.)
She felt herself turn to look over her shoulder.
"It seems that you are somehow aware." She could almost see him walk: perfectly paced, sinuous steps across the stone floor that almost swallowed the sound of his feet. "That fool Nnoitra strayed from the rest of the group, even though he was explicitly ordered to wait in his own domain..."
Her frame tightened even more. Did her heart race for fear or for tension?
She spoke low, but clear. "Sado-kun isn't dead."
(What? Kagerou wanted to scream, to throw herself against the wall of the memory and break through to reach her past self. Kind-Chad, Sado-kun, dead?)
The man was silent for a beat.
"He isn't dead," she insisted. Tears burned in the corners of her eyes.
He shifted. "Enter." The word wasn't spoken to her. She heard the soft noise of wheels, like a cart being rolled into the room.
"Here's your meal. Eat."
She stood thrumming with emotion like a violin string strung taut. "I don't need it."
Dishes clinked and clattered faintly in the background.
"It's part of your duty to stay alive until Aizen-sama calls upon you," he said. His tone never changed, never wavered. "Eat!"
Swallowing, she stayed motionless.
"Or would you like me to force it down your throat piece by piece? Stick a needle in your arm and feed you nutrients that way?"
"Sado-kun isn't dead..." It was a protective mantra, but it grew weaker by the repetition. She was trembling, ever so subtly.
"You are truly obstinate. It doesn't matter either way." She could not hear him move. Some threat seemed to loom closer anyway.
"What do you want me to say?" His words fell sharp and searing. " 'Don't worry, he's definitely still alive?' Disgusting. Don't think I came here just to fret upon you."
(I don't need your fretting, Kagerou almost hissed in her mind. I don't know you. You're an enemy. You hurt my friend.)
In the memory, she felt her teeth catch and sink into her lower lip. The tears grew warm and fat in her eyes.
"It makes no sense," the man huffed. "Why do you care so much who lives or dies? The fact is, all of your friends will eventually be destroyed by us."
Her eyes widened. She turned, slowly, softly.
"Don't act like it matters so much that one of them got ahead of himself. They all should have seen this from the very beginning."
"Stop it," she heard herself whisper, pleading.
"If they didn't, then their own stupidity is the sole cause. It's only natural to want to laugh at such foolish people. Why can't you even do that?"
(Stop it stop it stopit- Kagerou no longer knew if she was thinking that now or in the darkness of the memory. Just shut up-)
"If I was in your place, I would simply be furious at those pathetic losers who decided to storm in here, out of touch with the reality of their own power."
Clap went her shoe on the thick stone floor. She felt her muscles tense and her arm swing wide to the side to gather force into the blow. She delivered a resounding slap across his face, her breath sharp and harsh as all the gathering strain in her shot into that gesture of defiance.
There was a moment of frozen silence. She stared-at him, steadfast, too caught up in her own fury to care about anything else.
He turned on whispering feet. "I will come again in one hour. If you haven't eaten by then, I will restrain you and feed you by force. That is a promise."
The door shut with a hollow sound, and the lock clinked with a note of finality. Her hands, clasped together, began to quiver. She slumped against a wall, the wracking shivers coming harder by the heartbeat, and collapsed into the tears she had held back for that small eternity.
[Memory taken from Bleach 262, "Unblendable", pp. 7-15.]