Still the riddle lies

Jan 08, 2011 23:43


Well, as no end of the hiatus is in view just yet (and what if I had Jan. 28 on countdoun?) I'm ambling through SPN seasons, in the meantime, ficcing my way, occasionally, through sporadic bouts of nostalgia.

The utter heartbreak of 'Jump the Shark' (on Dean's part, mostly, as it so often is) captivates me to no end. By far, that is the episode I ( Read more... )

dean&sam, call me ishmael, spn: fic, dean!angst, coin in the fountain, methinks i have astronomy, carry on my wayward, spn, a quality of blank

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Comments 10

borgmama1of5 January 8 2011, 22:30:56 UTC
Riveting writing of both sides of this equation--Dean thinking it is because John didn't trust Dean to protect Adam, while Sam thinks John didn't want to appear 'only human' before Dean...

And the heartbreaking thought that neither one of them is seeing John's reasons correctly.

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water_fowl182 January 8 2011, 23:03:18 UTC
Thank you heartily for the most insightful comment!

Dean was in such a dark place upon learing of not only having faltered in Hell but also having broken the seal, whereas his Dad withstood the ordeal, I wouldn't put it past Dean to relapse into belief he didn't deserve John's sacrifice. Which is obviously not true.

Actually, I do tend to believe Sam's reasoning, as I tried to pinpoint here, is closer to John's rationale behind keeping Adam a secret. John wanted to protect the 'sudden' son and try and get a clean slate at 'proper' parenthood, but I do think he was also afraid of Dean's reaction, afraid Dean would feel betrayed on behalf of his Mom. In the end, Dean still felt betrayed, but for different reasons. And Adam still ended up dead. Ergo - heratbreak all around.

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i_speak_tongue January 9 2011, 02:45:18 UTC
Oh, man. Meta and fic rolled into one. And I think these are both such perceptive interpretations!

There was a distinct quality to Dean's love. A clear-water magnitude that would inevitably hoist you up to someone you could be, given time and effort. Someone better, braver, kinder, stronger.

YES. This is brilliant. So well put. Dean has such keen instincts, save for if it has anything to do with the way he is being perceived by others. He's so aptly wrong here. And I love how Sam, in the wake of all that's happening with Ruby, is glad his Dad never had to see that kind of disappointment on Dean's face. Just... ouch. Dean really has no idea what kind of power he has over the people he's close to. NO IDEA.

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water_fowl182 January 9 2011, 08:26:03 UTC
Oh, thank YOU for such a fabulous review!

I'm beyond thrilled this managed to work on the meta-level. Hoped so much it would.

Yeah, indeed, wrapped up in many a woeful self-deprecation issue, Dean is, more often than not, far from aware how much his appreciation is valued and craved, in actuality; how much *he* is appreciated. Just wish he'd got the idea stated more explicitly to him, at times, from those he holds dearest.

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stjra January 9 2011, 04:06:51 UTC
Very nicely done. I can't think to deeply about the epi without getting sad for Dean and Sam.

You nicely gave us a look into each of their thoughts. Sadly as borgmama1of5 said neither of them got it exactly right. This very neatly show the complex dynamic in the Winchester family. Well done.

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water_fowl182 January 9 2011, 08:28:22 UTC
Thank you so much for the kindest review!

I'm excited the jarring and often tragic ambiguity of the Winchesters' dynamics managed to work for you in this little drabble.

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smilla02 January 9 2011, 18:41:23 UTC
Oh, it's always hertbreaking realizing how their perception is so skewed, and for this reason, yes, wrong, though makes so much sense for who they are and how they've grown up. Lovely mirrored drabbles!

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water_fowl182 January 9 2011, 19:05:32 UTC
Thank you so much for the kindest review!

Yeah, the issue of all of the Winchester men's repeated inability to accurately grasp each other's respective needs/motives adds up to a whole world of heartbreak.

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kalliel January 17 2011, 08:17:11 UTC
The introduction of Adam/revisitation of Sam and Dean's (Dean's especially) relationship with John is probabl one of my favorite things about S4. These are really lovely, perceptive interpretations. Great job! Thank you for sharing~

p.s. your tags for this post are awesome. XD

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water_fowl182 January 17 2011, 13:14:59 UTC
Thank you for the kindest words!

The whole issue of Adam and the angle it skewed Dean's and John's 'post-mortem' relationship onto is, by far, one the most painful things for me to contemplate, due for the most part to Dean's imminent heartbreak and rueful epiphany and yet, steadfast acceptance (with the hefty load of self-flagellation, given Dean's state-of-self at that point in the show, thrown into the mix).
I'm glad this little take on interpreting the sad dysfunctional mess that are the Winchester men managed to work for you!

ETA: Oh, I know my tagging system is not quite transparent (apart from the obvious stuff) and I'm probably due a separate tag-disambiguation post, but I'm thrilled you happen to like them. I kinda always secretly hope my tags manage to function as a micro-meta in and of themselves, on some level.

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