Fic: In Beer Veritas 5/5
Authors: fides & valcon4
Title: In Beer Veritas
Fandoms: Highlander / Buffy / watcherverse
Pairings: Duncan / Methos
Rating: R/15
Summery: In the aftermath of the events of Spiritus Sancti, Duncan demands a few answers.
Warnings: valcon4's first foray into writing! Thanks to hotspur18 for the beta and to fides for the title and all the moral support.
The words "you don't draw a sword against your brothers" drifted into my mind, and I realised the magnitude of what I had said. "I'm sorry." My voice was barely audible.
"As I said, it does not matter."
"But it does!" I tried to choose my words with more care. "‘It's as if; if it's to do with you it's not important. If the situation was reversed you would keep asking."
"No - I would have the sense to walk away."
My heart dropped. "Is that what you want me to do? Walk away?"
"It is the prudent thing."
"Forget prudent. What do you want?"
"To live."
"Do you want me to walk away?"
"It would be the sensible thing." Methos insisted.
"I'm not talking about sense or being prudent here. What do you want me to do Methos?"
He didn’t answer me.
"Do you want to know what I want right now?"
He looked at me. "Do you even know what you want right now?" He was mocking my tone.
"Yes. Right now; I want to be able to understand you and all your quirks."
He laughed. "Because it is that easy."
"No not easy, far from it. Amanda I have an understanding of, even Darius. But you… You’re a closed book."
"Maybe you just haven't learned to read the language." That felt promising.
"Fine, teach me!" I pleaded with him.
"You assume I want to be read."
"Methos if you want me to walk away, just say so. Not because it’s sensible or for the best, but because you want me to."
"What will you do you if I say yes?" - was he really considering that as an option? Had I misread him that much?
"Shut up, finish my drink....." and go back to the island to be with my memories.
"Don't you think if I wanted you gone, one of us would be?"
My heart lifted, a smile spread across my face. "Can I take that as a no?"
"You can take it however you want - I'm sure you will anyway."
"Thank you." You couldn’t say it out right, but that’s close enough. I laughed, feeling more relaxed now.
Methos was shaking his head in what I took to be disbelief.
"What?"
"Only you could take that as a compliment."
Smiling, I drank some more, savouring the taste "I just figure it's as close of one as I am going to get from you."
"You never know - it is possible some day you may earn one." - Was he issuing a challenge? - "stranger things have happened after all"
"Earn one!" I decided to play along. "I’ll have to work on it."
"We’ll give it another few centuries." Methos mused.
"Centuries!" I scoffed. "Please, I’ll manage it sooner than that!"
Methos, to my delight, looked thoughtful. "We will see. You have surprised me before."
I had?
"Really… When?"
"It might only be decades..." Methos conceeded and for a brief moment I felt honoured."Many many decades" he finished.
"I'll make a note in my journal." I told him sarcastically.
"It is always good for the young to have a goal to work towards."
Methos sounded so much like a querulous old school marm I laughed, I couldn't help myself, to the point my sides ached. Methos carried on drinking, totally ignoring me.
When I managed to regain my composure, I said, "I'll try not to disappoint you." I hope the words had as much sincerity as I wanted them to.
I thought I heard Methos say, "I'm sure you won't." but it was so quiet I suspected it wasn’t intended for me to hear.
I shot him a glance, and watched him study his drink.
"So how do you suggest I proceed?"
"In what?"
"In getting a real compliment. Any pointers?" I teased.
He looked away and back at me almost reluctantly. "I'm sure you will find something you are good at." His words did not inspire me.
Something was wrong, and I knew it. I reached out, taking hold of his arm. "What’s troubling you?"
"What makes you think anything is troubling me?"
"You almost look, well sad." I can, after all, read him a little.
"Almost." Did he sound annoyed?
"Would you rather look sad, than almost?" I didn’t wait for an answer, it wasn’t meant as that sort of question. "‘But yes, almost but not quite." I considered my next line.
"Like you are thinking about times that haven't happened yet." I sat up, removing my hand from his arm. "A wise man once told me you have to live in the now."
"I believe I said not to live in the past."
I grinned. "I'm sure you said to live in the present."
"That does not mean you cannot think about the future." Methos' tone was serious.
"True. But what if it spoils the now?" The conversation was making me feel uneasy.
"Sometimes the now must be sacrificed so there is a future."
That did not sound good to me. "Sacrificed completely - surely there can be a middle ground?"
Methos looked at me curiously. "And you think I am sacrificing it completely?"
"I don't know; I'm not fluent in the language yet." I paused, not sure we were having the same conversation but needing to do it anyway, "I just want to make sure you aren't going to."
"Sacrifice is rarely in my nature."
I smiled as the memory of Methos stretched out over Joe’s bar drifted through my mind. "Good, but after the other day that statement is a bit iffy." The thought nagged at me. "The other day…"
I hadn’t meant to say that quite yet, I had wanted a little longer to put the sentence together, but now I was looking at the ceiling for divine inspiration.
My mind was full of memories, but not my own. I was seeing through Kronos’ eyes again! Methos; stretching, begging, writhing. I closed my eyes tightly, trying to shut them out.
Methos must have been watching me. His voice was faint, like I was dreaming. "Duncan, come back to me." I wanted that more than anything.
I released the pressure on my eyelids for a second, but again the visions flooded in. The Horsemen's camp: fur rugs, Methos naked, scraping my teeth down his neck, Methos turning his head, bucking as I, no, Kronos sucked on his flesh, groaning his encouragement. I shut my eyes tight.
I could hear Methos softly in the distance. "This is today."
Even with my eyes closed the memories came: "Strip - Tend Me.", my hand holding a cloth pressed between his buttocks teasing the cleansed flesh with my tongue.
I felt his hand on my face and a jolt ran through me. "Duncan MacLeod of the Clan MacLeod." He insisted.
I started to open my eyes again, and this time the memories were mine. The back room at Joe’s: Methos saying "It will be alright. Trust me. You can do this", him taking my face in his hands and kissing me.
"Hear me now." Methos’ words were no longer distance, I was back.
His fingers were splayed across my cheek and cupping my chin, trapping me into a truth I hadn't known. "... when you kissed me, it was like…suddenly being alive for the first time in my life." I smiled at the memory, my memory. "For the briefest of seconds everything was clear."
Methos drew back, his warm hand no longer on my face. "Duncan?"
I realised what I had just said. "I'm sorry. I think that comes under to much information." I settled back on my seat.
"I… What do you want me to say?"
My eyes closed again but this time against the present. "Tell me what you felt? Anything?"
"Duncan…" the sentence was broken by the all familiar buzz of another immortal.
Instinctively I turned towards the door.
"Are you expecting anyone?" Whatever Methos had been about to say made his voice sharp.
"No." I said. "You?" but I already knew the answer to that one.
Methos cocked his head and looked at me; a look I knew well. He was already starting to stand, as he spoke, "I think that is my cue… excuse me… Joe." He nodded to him and slipped off towards the back door.
I glanced at Joe and smiled. Live, grow stronger, fight another day!
Then I turned my attention back towards the door and waited to see who it was. Right then the possibility of an honest fight seemed an attractive one.
Title: In Beer Veritas
Fandoms: Highlander / Buffy / watcherverse
Pairings: Duncan / Methos
Rating: R/15
Summery: In the aftermath of the events of Spiritus Sancti, Duncan demands a few answers.
Warnings: valcon4's first foray into writing! Thanks to hotspur18 for the beta and to fides for the title and all the moral support.
The words "you don't draw a sword against your brothers" drifted into my mind, and I realised the magnitude of what I had said. "I'm sorry." My voice was barely audible.
"As I said, it does not matter."
"But it does!" I tried to choose my words with more care. "‘It's as if; if it's to do with you it's not important. If the situation was reversed you would keep asking."
"No - I would have the sense to walk away."
My heart dropped. "Is that what you want me to do? Walk away?"
"It is the prudent thing."
"Forget prudent. What do you want?"
"To live."
"Do you want me to walk away?"
"It would be the sensible thing." Methos insisted.
"I'm not talking about sense or being prudent here. What do you want me to do Methos?"
He didn’t answer me.
"Do you want to know what I want right now?"
He looked at me. "Do you even know what you want right now?" He was mocking my tone.
"Yes. Right now; I want to be able to understand you and all your quirks."
He laughed. "Because it is that easy."
"No not easy, far from it. Amanda I have an understanding of, even Darius. But you… You’re a closed book."
"Maybe you just haven't learned to read the language." That felt promising.
"Fine, teach me!" I pleaded with him.
"You assume I want to be read."
"Methos if you want me to walk away, just say so. Not because it’s sensible or for the best, but because you want me to."
"What will you do you if I say yes?" - was he really considering that as an option? Had I misread him that much?
"Shut up, finish my drink....." and go back to the island to be with my memories.
"Don't you think if I wanted you gone, one of us would be?"
My heart lifted, a smile spread across my face. "Can I take that as a no?"
"You can take it however you want - I'm sure you will anyway."
"Thank you." You couldn’t say it out right, but that’s close enough. I laughed, feeling more relaxed now.
Methos was shaking his head in what I took to be disbelief.
"What?"
"Only you could take that as a compliment."
Smiling, I drank some more, savouring the taste "I just figure it's as close of one as I am going to get from you."
"You never know - it is possible some day you may earn one." - Was he issuing a challenge? - "stranger things have happened after all"
"Earn one!" I decided to play along. "I’ll have to work on it."
"We’ll give it another few centuries." Methos mused.
"Centuries!" I scoffed. "Please, I’ll manage it sooner than that!"
Methos, to my delight, looked thoughtful. "We will see. You have surprised me before."
I had?
"Really… When?"
"It might only be decades..." Methos conceeded and for a brief moment I felt honoured."Many many decades" he finished.
"I'll make a note in my journal." I told him sarcastically.
"It is always good for the young to have a goal to work towards."
Methos sounded so much like a querulous old school marm I laughed, I couldn't help myself, to the point my sides ached. Methos carried on drinking, totally ignoring me.
When I managed to regain my composure, I said, "I'll try not to disappoint you." I hope the words had as much sincerity as I wanted them to.
I thought I heard Methos say, "I'm sure you won't." but it was so quiet I suspected it wasn’t intended for me to hear.
I shot him a glance, and watched him study his drink.
"So how do you suggest I proceed?"
"In what?"
"In getting a real compliment. Any pointers?" I teased.
He looked away and back at me almost reluctantly. "I'm sure you will find something you are good at." His words did not inspire me.
Something was wrong, and I knew it. I reached out, taking hold of his arm. "What’s troubling you?"
"What makes you think anything is troubling me?"
"You almost look, well sad." I can, after all, read him a little.
"Almost." Did he sound annoyed?
"Would you rather look sad, than almost?" I didn’t wait for an answer, it wasn’t meant as that sort of question. "‘But yes, almost but not quite." I considered my next line.
"Like you are thinking about times that haven't happened yet." I sat up, removing my hand from his arm. "A wise man once told me you have to live in the now."
"I believe I said not to live in the past."
I grinned. "I'm sure you said to live in the present."
"That does not mean you cannot think about the future." Methos' tone was serious.
"True. But what if it spoils the now?" The conversation was making me feel uneasy.
"Sometimes the now must be sacrificed so there is a future."
That did not sound good to me. "Sacrificed completely - surely there can be a middle ground?"
Methos looked at me curiously. "And you think I am sacrificing it completely?"
"I don't know; I'm not fluent in the language yet." I paused, not sure we were having the same conversation but needing to do it anyway, "I just want to make sure you aren't going to."
"Sacrifice is rarely in my nature."
I smiled as the memory of Methos stretched out over Joe’s bar drifted through my mind. "Good, but after the other day that statement is a bit iffy." The thought nagged at me. "The other day…"
I hadn’t meant to say that quite yet, I had wanted a little longer to put the sentence together, but now I was looking at the ceiling for divine inspiration.
My mind was full of memories, but not my own. I was seeing through Kronos’ eyes again! Methos; stretching, begging, writhing. I closed my eyes tightly, trying to shut them out.
Methos must have been watching me. His voice was faint, like I was dreaming. "Duncan, come back to me." I wanted that more than anything.
I released the pressure on my eyelids for a second, but again the visions flooded in. The Horsemen's camp: fur rugs, Methos naked, scraping my teeth down his neck, Methos turning his head, bucking as I, no, Kronos sucked on his flesh, groaning his encouragement. I shut my eyes tight.
I could hear Methos softly in the distance. "This is today."
Even with my eyes closed the memories came: "Strip - Tend Me.", my hand holding a cloth pressed between his buttocks teasing the cleansed flesh with my tongue.
I felt his hand on my face and a jolt ran through me. "Duncan MacLeod of the Clan MacLeod." He insisted.
I started to open my eyes again, and this time the memories were mine. The back room at Joe’s: Methos saying "It will be alright. Trust me. You can do this", him taking my face in his hands and kissing me.
"Hear me now." Methos’ words were no longer distance, I was back.
His fingers were splayed across my cheek and cupping my chin, trapping me into a truth I hadn't known. "... when you kissed me, it was like…suddenly being alive for the first time in my life." I smiled at the memory, my memory. "For the briefest of seconds everything was clear."
Methos drew back, his warm hand no longer on my face. "Duncan?"
I realised what I had just said. "I'm sorry. I think that comes under to much information." I settled back on my seat.
"I… What do you want me to say?"
My eyes closed again but this time against the present. "Tell me what you felt? Anything?"
"Duncan…" the sentence was broken by the all familiar buzz of another immortal.
Instinctively I turned towards the door.
"Are you expecting anyone?" Whatever Methos had been about to say made his voice sharp.
"No." I said. "You?" but I already knew the answer to that one.
Methos cocked his head and looked at me; a look I knew well. He was already starting to stand, as he spoke, "I think that is my cue… excuse me… Joe." He nodded to him and slipped off towards the back door.
I glanced at Joe and smiled. Live, grow stronger, fight another day!
Then I turned my attention back towards the door and waited to see who it was. Right then the possibility of an honest fight seemed an attractive one.