Running THE MAN
Running Man office AU
varied pairings
very short
#Jeny #InventorofHahyo #happybday #nedongsaeng(1)
I was working on something else (bigger and hopefully better) but jljdfa it is going to take much longer to complete, so I present you with this small turd instead! Happy birfday!!! You are the best.
Everyone is excited about Song Joongki's first day.
"The texture of his skin can rival that of a marshmallow," says Jaesuk knowledgeably, one arm dangling over the wall of Sukjin's cubicle.
"You mean baby's bottom," Sukjin corrects. "I don't think marshmallows have such a--"
"Are you doubting my analogy?" Jaesuk asks, affrontedly pushing up his glasses with his middle finger.
"Think about it, Jaesuk. Your son’s bare baby bottom as opposed to the skin of a marshmallow."
Jaesuk thinks about it. "You are a pervert."
In the meantime, Song Jihyo applies a thin coat of lipstick in the bathroom. Kang Gary is fixing his belt when he sees her pursing up in the mirror. "Oh my God, I'm--"
"It just smells so much nicer," Gary explains later.
"Have you tried the soap?” Donghoon wants to know.
Everyone, except Gwangsu.
"I've seen his picture. SHINee's Onew is prettier." He swivels in his chair and returns to clanking away on his keyboard. Even Jihyo is surprised at this uncharacteristic demonstration of nonchalance.
When everyone has returned to their respective seats-a fact Gwangsu confirms by craning his neck just an inch above the wall of his cubicle, as his torso, like his body, is terrifically long, and surreptitiously darting his eyeballs back and forth a few times-he carefully minimizes the Word document in progress ("f리ljifghyo nkjvoona sㄴㄹjtopj radeeadinglk ovekrr mhfya s싫hliuoldner ktlh♡x") and restores the Firefox window he'd pulled up earlier of Joongki's Facebook page.
He's posing with a small child, hopefully one that he knew prior to the taking of the photo. He looks smart, kind, and well-adjusted. Gwangsu hates him.
He prints out the photo immediately.
When Kim Jongkook isn't answering to angry ahjummas on their customer service hotline, he's fixing the vending machine on the third floor.
"It swallowed up my five hundred won without so much as an apology," blubbers Donghoon, his eyes filling up with thick invisible tears. "Hyung, I'll name you the godfather of my firstborn if you save me just this once."
Jongkook kicks the machine and it spits out a Fanta.
Jaesuk is the first person to comment on it when Jongkook sits back down at his desk. "You have a red mark on your neck... did someone hurt you?" The angry ahjummas of Jaesuk's imagination are vivid and unyielding.
"No,” Jongkook snaps, swiping a hand over the suspicious bruise. He ducks his head away from Jaesuk’s scrutiny and spends the rest of the day putting Donghoon’s sticky suction-kiss of gratitude out of his mind.
“Can you show me around?”
Gwangsu finds it extremely difficult to scowl at Song Joongki like he had planned. Something about the fat deposits in his cheeks conspires to give people feel-good vibes. “You’re asking the right person,” he says, getting up quickly and narrowly failing to jam his crotch against the corner of the desk. “I know everything.”
“That’s what Jihyo-noona said. She also warned that you were a compulsive liar.”
Gwangsu opens his mouth. “Jihyo-noona is actually in her mid-forties. Bet you couldn’t tell just from looking.”
They’ve arrived at the marketing side of the floor. “Kim Jongkook has the reflexes of a praying mantis,” Gwangsu whispers, instinctively deepening his slouch while they observe Jongkook cursing at his mouse.
“Is that a good thing?”
“For him, yes. For us . . .” Gwangsu lets the sentence dangle there. Joongki looks up at him questioningly. He holds the gaze. Joongki has very bright eyes.
“Let’s just say the bump on the back of my head isn’t from being dropped as a child,” Gwangsu finishes quietly. Joongki bites back what sounds like a sympathetic gasp but may in fact be suppressed laughter. It is too early to tell whose team Joongki is on, Gwangsu notes.
Team Gwangsu has been lonely for a very long time.
“Gary-hyung’s the nicest man you’ll ever meet,” Gwangsu continues. He gestures toward Gary’s cubicle, where Gary has fallen flat-faced asleep over his desk. “Sometimes Donghoon-hyung and I take turns drawing on his face.” He pauses. “We might let you join in. You know. If you’re interested.”
He peers carefully at Joongki, who is busy staring at Donghoon.
“Is there a reason that man is shirtless?”
“No,” Gwangsu says before coughing loudly into his fist. It sounds a lot like “Song Jihyo.”
When they’re out of earshot, Gwangsu explains, “They have an illicit office couple romance.”
“What? Is he into older women?”
“What?” Then Gwangsu remembers his lie. “Right. Yes. He has noona-fever these days.”
“Cool,” Joongki says. “Something we’ve got in common.”
Gwangsu droops a little.
Jihyo’s never dated anyone with more than one belly roll.
If passing notes through the pretty young receptionist, Lizzy, could be calling dating.
“You’ve got another one, unnie,” Lizzy drawls in exaggerated Busan dialect as Jihyo pretends to head for the bathroom. With a quick twist of her wrist Jihyo steals the small piece of paper from Lizzy’s dainty fingers.
“Please let me pull your pigtails,” reads Donghoon’s stupid third-grader handwriting.
“’You’re the vilest person I have ever met,’” Donghoon reads aloud to Gwangsu during his cig break. “‘7 PM, Seohyun Station.’”
Gwangsu doesn’t want to know, but it’s too late.
He tells Joongki, who is most commensurately heartbroken and therefore in dire need of some consoling. “Come over,” Gwangsu says soothingly. “I’ll make you chicken soup and we can play Wii Fit.”
They’re best friends in a week.
varied pairings
very short
#Jeny #InventorofHahyo #happybday #nedongsaeng(1)
I was working on something else (bigger and hopefully better) but jljdfa it is going to take much longer to complete, so I present you with this small turd instead! Happy birfday!!! You are the best.
Everyone is excited about Song Joongki's first day.
"The texture of his skin can rival that of a marshmallow," says Jaesuk knowledgeably, one arm dangling over the wall of Sukjin's cubicle.
"You mean baby's bottom," Sukjin corrects. "I don't think marshmallows have such a--"
"Are you doubting my analogy?" Jaesuk asks, affrontedly pushing up his glasses with his middle finger.
"Think about it, Jaesuk. Your son’s bare baby bottom as opposed to the skin of a marshmallow."
Jaesuk thinks about it. "You are a pervert."
In the meantime, Song Jihyo applies a thin coat of lipstick in the bathroom. Kang Gary is fixing his belt when he sees her pursing up in the mirror. "Oh my God, I'm--"
"It just smells so much nicer," Gary explains later.
"Have you tried the soap?” Donghoon wants to know.
Everyone, except Gwangsu.
"I've seen his picture. SHINee's Onew is prettier." He swivels in his chair and returns to clanking away on his keyboard. Even Jihyo is surprised at this uncharacteristic demonstration of nonchalance.
When everyone has returned to their respective seats-a fact Gwangsu confirms by craning his neck just an inch above the wall of his cubicle, as his torso, like his body, is terrifically long, and surreptitiously darting his eyeballs back and forth a few times-he carefully minimizes the Word document in progress ("f리ljifghyo nkjvoona sㄴㄹjtopj radeeadinglk ovekrr mhfya s싫hliuoldner ktlh♡x") and restores the Firefox window he'd pulled up earlier of Joongki's Facebook page.
He's posing with a small child, hopefully one that he knew prior to the taking of the photo. He looks smart, kind, and well-adjusted. Gwangsu hates him.
He prints out the photo immediately.
When Kim Jongkook isn't answering to angry ahjummas on their customer service hotline, he's fixing the vending machine on the third floor.
"It swallowed up my five hundred won without so much as an apology," blubbers Donghoon, his eyes filling up with thick invisible tears. "Hyung, I'll name you the godfather of my firstborn if you save me just this once."
Jongkook kicks the machine and it spits out a Fanta.
Jaesuk is the first person to comment on it when Jongkook sits back down at his desk. "You have a red mark on your neck... did someone hurt you?" The angry ahjummas of Jaesuk's imagination are vivid and unyielding.
"No,” Jongkook snaps, swiping a hand over the suspicious bruise. He ducks his head away from Jaesuk’s scrutiny and spends the rest of the day putting Donghoon’s sticky suction-kiss of gratitude out of his mind.
“Can you show me around?”
Gwangsu finds it extremely difficult to scowl at Song Joongki like he had planned. Something about the fat deposits in his cheeks conspires to give people feel-good vibes. “You’re asking the right person,” he says, getting up quickly and narrowly failing to jam his crotch against the corner of the desk. “I know everything.”
“That’s what Jihyo-noona said. She also warned that you were a compulsive liar.”
Gwangsu opens his mouth. “Jihyo-noona is actually in her mid-forties. Bet you couldn’t tell just from looking.”
They’ve arrived at the marketing side of the floor. “Kim Jongkook has the reflexes of a praying mantis,” Gwangsu whispers, instinctively deepening his slouch while they observe Jongkook cursing at his mouse.
“Is that a good thing?”
“For him, yes. For us . . .” Gwangsu lets the sentence dangle there. Joongki looks up at him questioningly. He holds the gaze. Joongki has very bright eyes.
“Let’s just say the bump on the back of my head isn’t from being dropped as a child,” Gwangsu finishes quietly. Joongki bites back what sounds like a sympathetic gasp but may in fact be suppressed laughter. It is too early to tell whose team Joongki is on, Gwangsu notes.
Team Gwangsu has been lonely for a very long time.
“Gary-hyung’s the nicest man you’ll ever meet,” Gwangsu continues. He gestures toward Gary’s cubicle, where Gary has fallen flat-faced asleep over his desk. “Sometimes Donghoon-hyung and I take turns drawing on his face.” He pauses. “We might let you join in. You know. If you’re interested.”
He peers carefully at Joongki, who is busy staring at Donghoon.
“Is there a reason that man is shirtless?”
“No,” Gwangsu says before coughing loudly into his fist. It sounds a lot like “Song Jihyo.”
When they’re out of earshot, Gwangsu explains, “They have an illicit office couple romance.”
“What? Is he into older women?”
“What?” Then Gwangsu remembers his lie. “Right. Yes. He has noona-fever these days.”
“Cool,” Joongki says. “Something we’ve got in common.”
Gwangsu droops a little.
Jihyo’s never dated anyone with more than one belly roll.
If passing notes through the pretty young receptionist, Lizzy, could be calling dating.
“You’ve got another one, unnie,” Lizzy drawls in exaggerated Busan dialect as Jihyo pretends to head for the bathroom. With a quick twist of her wrist Jihyo steals the small piece of paper from Lizzy’s dainty fingers.
“Please let me pull your pigtails,” reads Donghoon’s stupid third-grader handwriting.
“’You’re the vilest person I have ever met,’” Donghoon reads aloud to Gwangsu during his cig break. “‘7 PM, Seohyun Station.’”
Gwangsu doesn’t want to know, but it’s too late.
He tells Joongki, who is most commensurately heartbroken and therefore in dire need of some consoling. “Come over,” Gwangsu says soothingly. “I’ll make you chicken soup and we can play Wii Fit.”
They’re best friends in a week.