Holy Shit It's a Con Report Get in the Car: Part Two.

[wanttobeatree]

I JUST SACRIFICED VITAL BIG BANG READING TIME TO WRITE THIS!

Okay, so, it’s practically a week since part one of this report, and over a week since the con itself, so my memories are getting kinda hazy. But there are stories I have yet to tell! So I will do my best to recount them.

THE JOURNEY BEGAN HERE.



*

SUNDAY
AKA, Yes, Jensen Ackles, Yes I Will Suck Your Dick

• I CANNOT REITURATE HOW WEIRD IT WAS TO BE THE MORNING PERSON IN OUR ROOM. It is something I have only before experienced with rudhampaiel, so maybe it’s a fangirl thing. Or maybe I am just more dedicated to my CON SQUEE than rionaleonhart and theoret were. Pussies. I was up and washed and dressed and making myself feel ~pretty~ by the time they crawled out of their beds.
  
  
• It started late. Obviously it started late. We played truth or unicorn in the queue (TOUGH QUESTION: who would be the sparkliest unicorn, Misha or Genevieve?) and had a breakfast of barley sugars, glacier mints and hobnob biscuits.
  
  
• If you’re wondering, by the way, we got up at seven both con mornings. A bit dedicated, but not crazy dedicated. However, it was dedicated enough that we were - what? Seven rows back? Seven-ish rows back, this morning. SUCK IT, EVERYBODY BEHIND US.
  
  RICHARD HAD A FABULOUS BEARD PT. 2
  
  
  • HE WAS JUST AS CHARMING TODAY, FYI. And also opened up the panel by suggesting that, if you ever stay in a moated castle with Jared and Jensen, you don’t say yes when they ask if you’d like more drinks. In my mind, J2 are now sneaky fuckers who plot to get everybody drunk so they can sit back and lol at the alcoholic antics. I bet they persuaded Richard to put his pants on his head or something.
    
    
  • And then Richard told lots of stories about Band of Brothers which, whilst very entertaining, didn’t excite me enough for much in the way of note-taking. He did remark that Britain is like “the launching pad for the world”, which amused me somewhat.
    
    
  • He really loved doing Mystery Spot as he got to work with Kim and stuff, but he prefers Tall Tales as he wasn’t actually in Mystery Spot all that much. Whereas, for Tall Tales he got to spend three days watching hot women beat up Jensen Ackles. It is an experience he recommends. (Unlike putting his pants on his head.)
    
    
  • If he had magical Trickster powers, he would make Jared and Jensen go through life short. I IMAGINED THEIR MASSIVE HEADS ON STUMPY LITTLE MIDGET BODIES. (Also, he claimed that Jensen was 6’2, which. Hmm. On the one hand, Richard is presumably not as obsessed with the Jackles stature as we are (although you never know), which leaves more room for inaccuracy. On the other hand, working with a guy probably gives you a better idea of his height than five seconds of a photo op.)
    
    
  • Okay I think Richard actually might be obsessed with J2’s height, seeing as the next story he told was about the cameraman framing a shot with Rich between the guys. Cameraman tells Richard to get in position, OH NO WHAT’S THIS, Richard is in position. Under the camera.
    
    
  • If Richard were to be a mythical beast, he would like to be Sasquatch. “Strong, large, hairy, and elusive.”
    
    
  • I think EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THE GUESTS had trouble understanding accents at this con. Which entertained me hugely. Oh how the tables have turned. Doug has - to Richard - a very strong accent, so during Saturday morning’s opening ceremony, during which all the guests were invited on stage amid a sea of applause and dolphin noises, Richard and Misha were lurking backstage going “Did he introduce us? Have we been introduced yet?” “I DON’T KNOW D:”
    
    
  • In further adventures of Richard Cannot Understand Accents, during BoB filming they went to talk to an Irish dude about gun calibres. Irish dude says this particular gun is “pine tree oh.” Richard and his fellow Americans go “… pine trees?” Irish dude goes “PINE. TREE. OH. :|” Richard plus American go “… um.” Irish dude snaps and, with flamboyant hand actions, goes “PINE. (point) TREE. (three) OH. (well. oh.)” Oh Irish dude, I don’t know you but I kinda love you.
    
    
  • Richard finished off the panel by filming us all to show off to us friends - and the hall was completely packed this time, what with Jensen being on next, so I think he will have rubbed it pretty thoroughly in his friends faces as 1500 people shrieked “WE LOVE THE TRICKSTER!!” and cheered manically. (“I’m gonna put you up on YouTube,” he said, “see how you like it.” Which… I do wonder if he has.)
  
  
  JENSEN ACKLES DID SOME STUFF, I HEAR
  
  
  • You know how I said I was starting to forget stuff from the con? Well, I didn’t even make any notes for this panel, so uh. I have my tweets and I have my memories, so we shall see how well I do.
    
    
  • I DO REMEMBER THIS MUCH: I know a lot of people had been raising their eyebrows sceptically at having Jason in the panel, but he really did add an awesome dimension to it. He kept Jensen relaxed! And also, you know, teased the fuck out of him without having to worry (well… as much) about fangirls asking to marry him, unlike Jared. Also, he seems to be a very bad influence to have around fangirls, as hee seems to revel in MAKING JENSEN SQUIRM.
    
    (I know a lot of people were shocked and appalled by fans booing at Jensen’s refusal to do Eye of the Tiger, and it certainly made me roll my eyes too, but Jason was definitely encouraging a lot of that and... well. I can’t fault a guy whose hobbies include making his BFF uncomfortable in front of 1500 fangirls.)
    
    
  • Also, I expect you have all seen the pictures of Jensen and his shirt and his sunglasses on the collar by now, but good goddamn was he hot.
    
    
  • REALLY, I expect you have all heard EVERYTHING about this panel already. So uh. Feel free to skip straight to the bit where I heckled him about trivia, if you want to. If you’d rather stick with my forgetful ride: this is also the panel during which the Tale of Jared and Jensen Saving Old Ladies was first told. Whether it was before or after Richard put his pants on his head, Jason did not say. He was too busy milking the ‘awwww’s out of the audience.
    
    YEAH I JOINED IN ON THOSE AWWS. Omfg he told the tale so adorably. Whilst Jensen was sat there going ‘shut uupp ohmygod -_-‘ Jensen and Jared were chatting - not even to each other, to OTHER PEOPLE (to Richard with his head-pants, perhaps), when they sensed an UNNATURAL MOVEMENT IN THE AIR. The movement of a little old lady falling over. And without any consultation or ‘oh do you think we should…’ they both sprung into glorious action and, as Jason tells it, brought her ice and wrapped her in a blanket. The old lady’s grown of pain quite possibly became a groan of delight.
    
    “We’re contractually obliged to save people,” Jensen argued. Adorably.
    
    
  • Actually, that would be a pretty excellent J2 AU. By day (and sometimes night), they film cult somewhat hits! By night (or, I guess, day) they fight crime! BECAUSE DAWN OSTROFF TOLD THEM TO.
    
    
  • Jensen is of the opinion that Dean should man up and get over his ‘oh no Sam might be evil’ angst. I think really he’s just tired of pumping out those single perfect tears day after day. Perhaps his eye udders are getting sore from all the milking.
    
    Okay I have grossed myself out with that analogy. Let’s move on.
    
    
  • AS YOU HAVE ALL HEARD, Jensen chose the fucking red shorts himself. He tried on some other, less plum-snuggling (or whatever the phrase was. I like the thought of snuggling plums, anyway) shorts but he knew they just WERE NOT SHORT ENOUGH. He had a gym teacher in mind, who wore these traumatising red shorts, and by god he went and hunted them down himself. Jensen Ackles is just that dedicated to humiliating himself on TV!
    
    
  • Also his idea = throwing the dodgeball at the kid. He shared his theory with director, director cracked the fuck up and rang up Kripke and said “Jensen wants to peg a young boy.” Yeah, my mind went there. As did theoret's. You could hear all the dirty minded fans sniggering in patches throughout the audience. (I hope Jensen does know what pegging is and internally winced at his error. I don’t want to live in a world where Jensen doesn’t know pegging.)
    
    
  • He actually made Jared go see Friday the 13th with him. Padalecki and Ackles: co-dependents extraordinaire! Why is there not fic of them heckling each other’s movies?
    
    
  • AND THEN HE MENTIONED DANNEEL. BY NAME. Audience cheered, Jensen looked positively delighted and exclaimed “Yeah! Right? I love her.” It was completely adorable and also the least romantic declaration of love ever. Not, you understand, in a bad way. He just sounded like a COMPLETE FAN BOY. “Ohmigosh, Danneel Harris? I love her!” It really, really fits into that story Danneel told about how RIDICUOUSLY THRILLED he was that they were working together on TIH. Oh Jensen. You are either the suavest dork or the dorkiest suave guy in the world. Maybe both.
    
    
  • You know what else was awesome? Hilarious tales about Icarus the dog, is what. He likes to BOUNCE ON HARLEY’S FACE. One time, he was trying to bite off Harley’s ears or something when Harley shook his head and Icarus helicoptered. Jensen reckons it was the best damn thing he’s ever seen. I bet after a hard night’s emoting he likes to come home, crack open a beer and dog-watch.
    
    
  • Jason joined in the adorable dog stories by informing us that he has some serious leap for such a ting dog, and whenever Jensen comes home Icarus will just stand in one spot and BOUNCE UP AND DOWN. Adorable. Jensen Ackles, why the fuck are you not out there walking your tiny adorable dog which you blatantly adore where PAPARAZZI can see you? We need pictures. I mean, more pictures than the adorable one you have on your phone, you giant dork.
    
    
  • And then, guys? Then I heckled him.
    
    
  • IT HAPPENED A LITTLE SOMETHING LIKE THIS: a woman with two adorable sons/nephews had asked this question to Jared for them, yesterday: who’s killed more demons, Sam or Dean? Jared reckoned Sam, and also reckoned that Jensen would say Sam too.
    
    So today, woman asks Jensen the same question, and remarks that Jared thought he’d say Sam too.
    
    “Ahh,” Jensen says, “but what you’ve gotta remember is Sam went to Stanford while Dean stayed hunting.”
    
    Audience cheers. EXCEPT theoret and I had had ourselves a massive rant about oft forgotten canon just the night before, and all the pain and indignancy of people forgetting that Dean and John invented the rock salt pellets whilst Sam was in Stanford and that the demon in Phantom Traveller was the first demon the boys saw was still SO FRESH IN MY MIND.
    
    “Oh no, you’re not going to-” theoret says, perhaps remembering the same conversation, or perhaps feeling me draw in my big, heckling breath, or perhaps just sensing a disturbance in the force. But it’s too late. Words came out of my mouth, guys!
    
    “SAM AND DEAN NEVER MET A DEMON BEFORE PHANTOM TRAVELLER,” I yell, “SO SUCK IT.”
    
    I have no idea how the rest of the audience reacts to this, so it’s entirely possible I’m sitting in a roomful of 1500 people wanting to strangle me, but a) TRIVIA IS IMPORTANT and b) Jensen’s focussed ~entirely on me~ (haaa, it’s not like he can actually see me over the blinding lights, but w/e.) So Jensen pauses, considering my suggestion.
    
    “Oh, security?” he says, waving an imperious hand. “Remove the dissident, please.”
    
    (Okay, he probably didn’t actually say dissident. It’s been over a week. My memory is fuzzy. It was dissident in spirit.)
    
    “THE DEMON IN PHANTOM TRAVELLER WAS THEIR FIRST,” I yell, caught up in the Trivia Moment. “THEY DIDN’T KNOW WHAT IT WAS.”
    
    A pause. (Jensen may or may not say “Really? They didn’t?” or something along those lines, but I can’t remember anymore. He definitely went “Pfft, Phantom Traveller” and waved his hand imperiously again at some point in the proceedings.)
    
    “I WIN,” I add, as a heckle-y after thought.
    
    
  • So yeah, the panel closed, and there was much in the way of dolphins and cheering as Jensen exited the stage. “YOU suck it,” he threw back over his shoulder. It’s possibly a good thing that the audience was too loud for me to respond.
    
    rionaleonhart, who had been sat a bit further back as she’d missed most of the panel to get autos, appeared at my side and SOMEHOW KNEW that obviously - obiviously - if anyone in 1500 people told Jensen Ackles to suck it, it must have been me. It could well have been the geekiest moment of my life. Other people embarrass themselves at cons by asking the guests to marry them. I argue about trivia! (And I regret nothing.)
    
    And that, guys, was the first trivia argument. I kind of made a habit of it.
    
    
  • Oh also, everybody has seen the pictures of Jensen’s surprise!James Bond!dancing as he left the panel, right? Right. I promise you, guys, it was even more amazing irl. THE ONE TIME I REALLY CURSED MY CAMERA’S USELESSNESS.
  
  
  
• Now ze_pink_lady and I skedaddled to the auto room, tragically missing out on the chance to watch Malik bring audience members up onto the stage and grind with them. Oh Malik, shine on you crazy, glorious diamond. Our numbers were low enough that we had been supposed to be in yesterday’s auto sesh for JPad etc, but obviously it has gone too slow or fucked up in some way that meant it only reached 3/400 or so.
  
  
• On the plus side, had we been in yesterday’s session we would have missed JARED AND MISHA HAVING A PEN THROWING CONTEST. They completely held up their signings to throw pens and giggle and everyone in the queues clapped and cheered when Misha won. (Jared ran away from his table to check how far his pen had gone, and good god people always seem to say that Jared is smaller than they expect in person but from where I was standing BOY IS HUGE.)
  
  
• A little while later, Misha started trying to throw mint in Jared’s mouth from across the room. Oh boys.
  
  
  
  
  
  1. Misha! His handler cracked the fuck up when I passed my picture to her, which drew Misha’s attention to me even as he was signing for the girl in front. He eyed the pony and then eyed me, in that… crazy-eyed, impossible to read Misha!way of his. I think he was amused. I was too busy going 8D to really tell.
  
  “Ahh,” he said, as he signed it. (Or maybe “well.” Something vague.)
  
  “You’re not allowed to eat that one,” I told him.
  
  Misha shook his head, unable to comprehend! “I can’t eat this one? What’s the point if I can’t eat it?”
  
  Every snappy comeback I had inside my body somehow completely left me at that point, so I just kind of blinked a bit and said “Castiel can ride it! THANK YOU” and then I (you’ve guessed it) stumbled away and cursed myself for the surprise Humour Fail. (What happened, self? What happened? There were so many possibilities and you missed them all.)
  
  2. SAMANTHA! SHE IS SO BEAUTIFUL.
  
  “Hi,” I said, “you’ve probably heard this a million times already, but your hair is AWESOME.” Which somehow launched us into a discussion about the benefits of short hair and how my hair is kinda like hers but it HAD been shorter. Ngg she’s so lovely.
  
  3. Matt! I kind of failed at Matt. I had been all prepared for him to look up and say hi or something, but he just signed my picture and then looked up at me. THE PICTURE WAS SIGNED! WHAT DID I DO? I was all out of ideas, so I just said “THANK YOU” and smiled massively and scuttled away to facepalm. This was an autograph session of failure, guys!
  
  4. Amy! Aka quite possibly the most adorable girl in the world? This time I had learnt from my Matt Mistake and went HI the second I got to her table. Because I am cunning like that. Told her she was an awesome Mary and she went “Aww, thank you.” And then I glanced down and went OH MY GOD YOU HAVE A BEAUTIFUL SIGNATURE. (She really, really does.) I think Amy may have been even more flattered by that than by the Mary compliment.
  
  5. JARED. Once again, the handler cracked up as I passed him the Spacechesters. He passed it to Jared who ALSO LOL’D. I said thank you and nothing even a little bit amusing and scuttled away once more. Autograph session of failure. Although, I made JPad lol. That’s got to count for something!
  
  FRED IS INSANE PT.2
  
  
  • I don’t know how he manage to be so charming and entertaining whilst essentially telling the same stories over and over again, but somehow he does it. It’s a serious talent.
    
    
  • Also, he told the best story ever in this panel: The Epic Tale of How Fred Was Expelled From High School. There’s no way I can do its sheer level of awesome justice, but I’ll do my best. The internet needs to know these things.
    
    So back when Fred was seventeen, the school nurse had a bit of a grudge against him because he used to tell her off for turning up drunk to his mum’s play rehearsals and he also somehow got it revealed that she was a TB carrier. Also back when Fred was seventeen, his brother worked in the props department for a Shakespeare company. Naturally, he gave Fred a fuckload of fake blood and retractable knives and retractable stiletto for his birthday. This was when Fred happened to have an ‘Exploring American Cinema’ class so naturally, naturally, he and his partner decided to stage a fantastic, bloody knife-fight as a ‘tribute to American cinema’ for their class presentation.
    
    Only on the day they came to school with Fred packed full of fake blood, their presentation was put off until another day. Somewhat put out by this turn of events, Fred plus friend slouched outside to where all the smokers were busy smoking. And, well. Being teenage boys and all, the only option Fred’s friend has was to stab him with the retractable stiletto. OBVIOUSLY. So Fred bites a blood pellet, staggers towards a cheerleader spewing blood (she ran away screaming) and crawls out into the rain. He’s surrounded by a whole load of excited teenagers and he’s covered in fake blood, so WHAT ELSE CAN HE DO BUT FAKE HIS DEATH? He collapses dramatically into a puddle.
    
    And then he stands back up again to a massive round of applause, only to hear someone yelling ‘the nurse is coming!’ So what else can he do but FAKE HIS DEATH AGAIN? He recollapses into the puddle and plays dead as the nurse comes rushing over and feels his pulse. And that’s what Fred sits up, coughs out a load of fake blood, and exclaims ‘HEY NURSE, WHAT’S UP.’
    
    The nurse falls over and has a nervous breakdown right there in the puddle. Fred (who has already been accepted to his college, so what does he care?) is very, very expelled.
    
    And then, guys? Two years later, when Fred is a THESPIAN, they call him up and ask him to come speak on careers day. They never gave him his high school diploma, so that phone call, Fred dramatically remarked, was the first time he ever said the words “I’ll make you a deal…”
    
    
  • Now you understand why my subheading for his talks is ‘FRED IS INSANE’, I think.
    
    
  • Also, since playing that dude in Lost, he makes people very nervous when he goes on aeroplanes.
    
    
  • Someone asked him ‘pirates or ninjas?’ and he was ridiculously amused by it, for all he didn’t quite GET it at first. “Depends on the occasion,” he said. “Saturday night parties, pirates. Rest of the week, ninjas.”
    
    Questioner clarified she meant who would win in a fight. Fred’s answer: “Ninjas. If they’re good swimmers.”
    
    
  • So Fred’s scene in IMToD with JDM! We all know the one. With him all advancing on Papa Winchester as he delivers his creepy monologue, looking up at JDM. And up at JDM. And, craning his neck back, up at JDM. “There’s something else I want just as much as that gun. Maybe more… an apple box.”
  
  
• AND THEN IT WAS LUNCH.
  
  
• Annoyingly, they’d said the hall wasn’t going to be cleared for lunch time (unlike Saturday) and then changed their minds - but only to clear it out for a couple of minutes. Apparently the room was overheating, or something. So we all squished out into the corridor and right back into the queue to get back in.
  
  
• But, eventually, we got our seats - ten row back from the front, like Saturday morning (BUT NOW WE WERE SPOILT AND USED TO BEING CLOSER!) Huffed and sighed and then engaged in the most badass con-going lunch tactics ever. rionaleonhart went to Subway by herself and got us all sandwiches, lurked outside to eat hers whilst we saved her seat, then she texted me to lurk outside and eat whilst she went and helped theoret save my seat, and then - you’ve guessed it - I texted theoret, gave her her sandwich, and went back to the hall. WE ARE DEDICATED, GUYS.
  
  
• Number of Subways eaten at this point in the narrative: 4.
  
  
• But then, oh no what is this, my number was called to (AT LAST) go and get my Jensen autograph, just as Jared’s panel is about to start! ze_pink_lady came with me and twitched a lot, as the LUCKY KARMIC BITCH had somehow won a coffee lounge with Misha as well as her earlier one with Jensen, and she was worried she was going to be late for it.
  
  
• Inevitably, just as we were about to get let into the auto room, my number was called for the Misha photo op smidirini sold to me (YAY 8D)
  
  
• Either Misha recognised me as the pony drawing girl or he was just plain amused by my, idk, bubbling personality. I was completely unterrified by his presence, unlike my Saturday experience with Jared, so as I was called forwards to my op I just went ‘HIIIIIYA’ and 8D’d at him. Misha gave me a LOOK and went ‘helloooo’ in, I cannot lie, a Mutley-ish sort of way, and then he 8D’d back. IT WAS A MOMENT.
  
  
• I’m going to face a fangirl mauling here and say that, despite him seeming like a very nice chap, I still don’t find Misha especially attractive. NOT EVEN HAVING SEEN HIM IN PERSON. Sorry, guys.
  
  
• So then I zipped back to the autograph room. The guy on the door continued his awesome trend of yesterday and let me go straight in, as he’d seen me leave when I was right at the front. And then ze_pink_lady was still in Jensen’s queue, fretting even more about her Misha coffee lounge, so I shiftily squished back in next to her.
  
  
• The girl in front of ze_pink_lady and I had an ear gauge (if you, like rhythmsextion, don’t know what an ear gauge is, just look over here) and Jensen was UTTERLY THRILLED BY IT. He was convinced that he could fit his pen through it and what fangirl is going to turn that request down? He tried and it did indeed fit and Jensen went 8DDDD!
  “Hey Gabe,” he said, “Gabe, LOOK AT THIS!”
  
  So Gabe looked, and Jensen demonstrated again (DELIGHTEDLY), and Gabe was probably thinking ‘aww Jensen you dork ♥’ just like the rest of us.
  
  
• And then ze_pink_lady gave him her ‘evolution of golf’ t-shirt and Jensen was THRILLED BY THAT TOO. He was all ‘for me??’, as if she were about to go ‘NO JENSEN. NO. ACTUALLY IT’S FOR YOUR HANDLER.’ Seriously, how is Jared always the dorky one in the fic? It is clearly Jensen who belongs in this role.
  
  
• Jensen’s handler, fyi, was the same guy who’d handled Jared’s autos in the morning. He was happy to see my Spacechesters again. Maybe I should have shown him my boots.
  
  
• Unfortunately, I have absolutely no idea how Jensen reacted to the Spacechesters, as this happened instead:
  
  Jensen: (readies himself for signing.)
  Me: UM I kinda may have told you to suck it, this morning…
  Girl next to me: (LOLS)
  Jensen: (pulls a face of GREAT AND OUTRAGEOUS SCANDAL) OH, THAT WAS YOU?
  Me: Yeeeeah -_-
  Jensen: Well, in that case (snatches the Spacechesters up and hides it under the table. Looks very smug about it.)
  Me: (trying not to lol at how smug he is looking.) I’M SORRY D: Words came out of my mouth!
  Jensen: (retrieves the Spacechesters and signs them. Smugly.)
  Me: …I’m right, though.
  Jensen: (looks up sharply, all eyebrows raised and whatnot) Really? :O
  Me: YEAH 8D Phantom Traveller was totally their first demon.
  Jensen: (SUSPICION!) You sure?
  Me: I swear! I remember really weird things about episodes!
  Jensen: Huh! I didn’t know that…!
  Me: You should warn Kripke, man! He might forget and get it wrong :D
  
  And then I realised that Jensen and I were having our SECOND TRIVIA ARGUMENT whilst Jensen was signing stuff for other fans and I felt pretty bad about stealing their Jensen time away, so I went THANKYOUSOMUCHOMG and stumbled - and sometimes I may have exaggerated the stumbling, but this time was very literal - away, hugging my folder to my chest.
  
  ALSO, HE IS SO INCREDIBLY BEAUTIFUL UP CLOSE. Even with my inability to look celebrities in the eye, I could see his beauty. Omg. Also also, he has got. just. the best voice in the WORLD. Hearing it on TV just PALES in comparison to hearing it all wonderful and up close irl.
  
  
• Somehow I made it back to the main hall and my seat between theoret and rionaleonhart without just COLLAPSING UNDER THE JENSEN-GLOW. If you want to know just how ridiculously fangirly I was, ask theoret. She can tell you all about my flailing.
  
  It’s possible I may have teared up a little bit. Possible in this context meaning ‘truthy truth.’ In conclusion: the way to my heart really is through heated debates about trivia.
  
  SAM, AMY AND MATT: TOGETHER THEY ARE ADORABLE PT.2
  
  
  • Okay, I cannot lie. I can’t remember ANYTHING about this panel, except that everyone was adorable in it.
  
  
  MISHA’S MILKSHAKE BRINGS BARBARA BUSH TO THE YARD.
  
  
  • You know what was a beautiful moment? When Jared came out doing his Dalek!angel ‘I RAISED YOU FROM PERDITION’ impression. That was a truly beautiful moment. rionaleonhart, theoret and I spent the rest of the day (and what little of Monday we spent together, boo D:) exclaiming I RAISED YOU FROM PERDITION in our best JaredDalek voices at unexpected moments. I think we bewildered a lot of non-congoing people.
    
    
  • Well. Um. I think this panel is kind of impossible to summarise, even in bullet points. I spent the first ten minutes or so of it queueing up to ask him a question and everyone in the line was essentially trying not to fall over, they were laughing that hard.
    
    
  • Oft, oft quoted: audience member asked him what he would like to ask Castiel. Misha complained that was like “being trapped in a box of mirrors. With a unicorn.” (A situation we later used in a game of TRUTH OR UNICORN. How would you escape out of a box of mirror with a unicorn? WELL, I’d tame the beast and urge it to gore the mirrors with its sparkly horn. OBVIOUSLY.)
    
    
  • I asked Misha to tell us an awesome tale about awesome Robert Wisdom is and, I’ll tell you what, it was REALLY hard to hear what he was saying when you were stood up there at the microphone. I have no idea why. But he went off on one of his insane stories and I could barely hear what he was saying but it was kind of hilarious anyway. Essentially, Robert and Misha were kidnapped by a crazy taxi driver who drove them around for several days, during which Robert and Misha compared their resumes and discovered that Robert is essentially “a bigger, older, blacker Misha.”
    
    
  • And then Misha claimed that angels have no opposable thumbs because they are part-lizard, which FILLED ME WITH JOY. There was that one time when I kind of accidentally accused him of being a lizard man on twitter, so it was nice to no longer feel so long in the reptilian accusations.
    
    
  • Also, y’know, Misha is very, very insane.
    
    
  • Unpopular opinion: I think he was kind of a bit too insane, towards the end. He had drunk a GREAT DEAL OF RED BULL and was stuck filling in for poor Jensen and, hey, if he wants to deal with cons by being deranged, that’s fair enough, but having a few serious answers or a straight man for him to play off (a la the magical Malik and Gabe) would have been good. Especially when he decided to conduct the script auction in DOLLARS. Who has a clue re the exchange rate in these economic conditions?
    
    
  • Having said that, when Doug brought Malik and Gabe up on stage, that was pretty wonderful. Great degrees of wonderful.
    
    
  • So as you’ve all heard, obviously, Jensen couldn’t do the final panel, as he was doing way too many autographs. Some people say he was the one who insisted he wanted to do them all, others say it was Rogue Events demanding it, but either way you definitely couldn’t expect him to come argue with me do a whole panel again afterwards. ngl, I WAS A BIT DISAPPOINTED, despite my sympathy for his fingers. I’d been going to ask him about BROCK KELLY and TEEN DEAN and ALL THOSE WONDERFUL THINGS.
    
    
  • But you know what would have been awesome? If Misha had really done as he’d threatened when Doug initially asked him to take over the panel and answered Jensen’s questions AS JENSEN. What a glorious mindfuck it could have been.
  
  
• So the con ended and the guests came out to wave goodbye and poor, poor Jensen looked completely exhausted, but still managed to be awesome. We made dolphin noises and then for, ALAS, the final time, queued our way out of the hall and to freedom.
  
  
• For some inexplicable reason, the photo studio had printed two copies of my Misha photo op (I hate my face in this one, too, but not quite as much as in Jared’s.) As I said in my twitter, I plan to stick CMM’s face over mine in one of them and then GIGGLE TO MYSELF. Yes, yes I am that easily amused.
  
  
• In conclusion: theoret, rionaleonhart and I are either the lamest or the most amazing people in the world. As we were chillaxing in our room post-con, I threw out a hasty ‘WHAT WOULD JARED AND JENSEN’S DAEMONS BE’ to make the other two stop talking about Pokemon, which - after heated debate about whether or not Jared’s would be a dog (and then a heated debate about whether or not Dean’s would be a wolf) - somehow ended up spawning hours and hours of crazy-detailed universe building. We have an SPN!daemon 'verse now, guys! We got so into it we forgot to eat until our Subway had closed and then we forgot to go down to the Sunday night disco. LAMEST OR MOST AMAZING.
  
  
• If you ever have to share a tiny single bed with a fangirl, by the way, theoret is a pretty awesome person to share it with. Just be prepared for accidental skullfucking conversations.
  
  *
  
  MONDAY
  AKA, Wait, There’s a Life Outside the Hilton?
  
• Somewhat hilariously, it turned out there was an 8:30 am fire alarm test scheduled for the hotel, which we had completely failed to pick up on until, yes, it went off at 8:30. This was also the time for which we had set our alarm clocks, so BOY WE WERE CONFUSED.
  
  
• Then we discovered that the hotel was charging us for about £13 of food which we had not bought. We wtf’d and went down to the check out to complain (and also to check out), and the guy was EXTREMELY OBLIGING ABOUT IT. We could have actually been completely lying, and I think he would have cheerful got rid of the expense for us. I guess the Hilton is too classy for people to nick overpriced chips.
  
  
• AND THEN, ALAS, WE PARTED WAYS :( It was really sad and involved lots of forlorn psychic automatic door opening and a bit of subdued I RAISED YOU FROM PERDITION and a few hugs. There is nothing in the world - I swear, guys, nothing in the world - more depressing than leaving fangirls behind and returning to irl. SOB. I MISS YOU GUYS.
  
  
• Also, rionaleonhart bought me a cheeseburger from BK for brunch. It was so disgusting and yet so good. Mmm, additives.
  
  
• And theeen I caught the train home and it was long and tiring and generally made of suck, but I took the six hours of train!time to work out just how many potential fics the SPN!daemon ‘verse had spawned. SEVENTEEN, is the answer. SEVENTEEN. LAME OR AWESOME: YOU DECIDE.
  
  
• And then I staggered back to my flat and collapsed on my bed. A little while later, I crawled back up again and stuck all my autographs up on my wardrobe door. And it was good.
  
  
  
  THE END.
  
  PS. MYSTICAL GLOWING FANGIRLS: THEY ARE MYSTICAL AND GLOWING.