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I keep having to remind myself tomorrow isn't Monday. My brain has no use for a day that was a holiday in a life where the days don't change only the day and night. Everything feels confusingly topsy-turvey. I feel sort of dizzy trying to think hard or long today. I've lost myself in watching two of the more extended art live streams that have 12- ( Read more... )

It's not a thing I do. I'm a survivor. It's one of those steel core thing I know. I'm a survivor of a lot of truly terrible things, and it's made it simple to walk through minor grief and heartbreaks of my life knowing "this is never as bad as watching your baby sister die of cancer for thirteenish years," or living your life like it was normal " ( Read more... )

Christmas with my parents happened last night (at least the Christmas between the three of us). We'll still be together next week on Christmas day, but we will be up in MA with the rest of my maternal family so we did ours here.


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I had so many plans for today, and ideas that it was going to mostly be nothing. Laying. Lounging ( Read more... )

Christmas Eve & ChristmasThese two days were very hard on me. I spent most of them on my bed reading, trying not to let myself think too much or just fall asleep and get through all of it incredibly faster. I had an incredibly nice few people trying to help, and offering things from near and far, but I was heart-sore and family-wanting all over by ( Read more... )

Christmas has been everywhere and absolutely nowhere ( Read more... )

I. Art Museum DayFor my birthday my stepfather gave me two year long memberships. One to the Zoo and the other to my favorite art museum in the city, where I've had a membership before (two years ago). I had to put off going for nearly two weeks due to crazy plans, but finally made it out this past Sunday. I was so, so incredibly happy ( Read more... )