people doubting me

[virginia_fell]

It makes me wrinkle my nose when people try to correct my self-image because they think I have some kind of negative messaging tape playing that's making me think wrong things. If I say that my first impulse is not to offer comfort, that is not an opportunity to correct me and tell me I really truly am a good person honest. If I say that I have

Comments

[belenen]

I am doing the wise and mature thing and staying aware of bugs in my system, of anything that raises the error rate of my thinking.

I appreciate this so much. I wish more people would do this.

[virginia_fell]

I try. It takes a lot of consistent effort to build the habits that allow me to do a passable job. That's why it stings so damn much when somebody thinks that reassuring me means glossing it over like my efforts didn't matter.

[veronica_rich]

We should have a lunch again sometime soon. If you like. (Apropos of nothing, the post just reminded me I wanted to say something. Not on LJ so much these days.)

[tgstonebutch]

Thank you so much for this. I really resonated with this part particularly:

"I want people to understand that I have to work harder than many people to achieve something like the same warmth and care that comes so naturally to so many, and when you tell me that you don't believe me when I say that... it makes me not trust you, because there is this gigantic thing that is a big part of why I think I am lovable and worthy that you can't even bring yourself to approach with your eyes open."

It sparked a bunch of reflection, speculation on why it's so hard for folks to hold this reality.

[admnaismith]

It is because of this that I respect you so much (and would probably love you, under different basic circumstances from what exists