[ It took her a long time to still her nerves and anxiety to do this; just writing his name like this is all she can manage in terms of wording anything. She's barely touched her NV in the past few days, let alone held a longer conversation. ]
Reaction/VideovinovidiviciOctober 16 2011, 20:12:51 UTC
[ The incoming message gets what would almost have been a double-take if he didn't move so fast. He hits the video reply (text would take too long). The past few days have dragged by, and her initiating contact, even if it turns out to be serious, is such a relief that he feels it physically, like a jolt in his stomach. ] Yes! Hello, Chane?
[ Her response is not as delayed as it would otherwise be, were she not forcing herself to go ahead, simply to communicate before she changes her mind and stops again. ]
I didn't thank you for helping me on Friday.
[ No. That's not what she wants to say. But she has not the words to express how she felt at the time compared to how she feels now. ]
That's - [ He almost finishes that's fine, not worried about any lack of gratitude on her part, especially not when he has other concerns about her, but he remembers brushing off that other time she'd thanked him - it was important to her. He settles, pulling at his collar pensively. ] That's... all right. You're welcome, but it's not like I coulda not helped. Protectin' you is important to me, too... [ He smiles, suddenly thinking of a better way to sum it up. ] It was my pleasure.
[ "Couldn't have not helped". His general response warms her a little, it should warm her more but it stops short at that phrase.
There. That's the unsolvable problem. Specifically, the problem she is avoiding. If a different person had come to find her-- one with tracking abilities, perhaps-- it would have made sense. But because this is Claire whose worldview is self-sufficient, who wants to protect her... she can't stop thinking about it. There must be a reason, a correlation. ]
Not too sure on that one myself. [ Unable to read how serious her question is, and lacking the knowledge to understand why it bothers her, he takes it at face value. ] What happened was, I was at work - and then I felt real peculiar so I ran off and found you. [ He realises he needs to elaborate on that, letting out a long "uuummm" and rubbing at his temple with a thumb ] I just sorta... had this feelin' that didn't fit right. Tell you the truth I was scared like I don't remember bein' for a long time, you know? Then it ended up gettin' more and more like reality, and I could see where you were and feel that thing that was attackin' you.
[ He considers the "how" of it seriously for a bit, looking off and scratching along his jawline in concentration. Eventually he finishes deliberating, coming to his own conclusions about the correlation. ] What I think it was is, I heard your heart callin' out to me!
[ It's probably good that he replies objectively; despite his honesty, she wonders how the awareness of her distress would colour his response, similar to how their conversation had been scarce of late.
Like reality. He could feel it. Fear, sensation-- the same way that she, at that time, had begun to feel his spirit in fighting for her. The same way she had experienced all the senses in Tonegawa's delusion. That recollection, the memory of it happening once before with a different person, serves to neither relieve nor confuse her further; only confirms that, for all his good intentions, Claire's last statement is likely false.
It is five minutes before she replies, delicately, still unsure. ]
I don't understand what happened then, when you heard me. I might be able to discuss this better in person.
[ He's not at all fazed by her apparent rejection of his heartfelt explanation (partially solipsism has made him accustomed to it, but mostly he's just glad of a chance to see her after this lull in their communication). ]
Sure. I can meet you at your place right now, if you like?
[ Perhaps one day she'll be more appreciative of that declaration. For now, she can only think of it logically, how she didn't call for anybody. She'll be waiting in the boarding-house kitchen, front door unlocked, clinging to the feeble hope that he might understand more than she does by seeing her. ]
Claire?
Reply
Reply
I didn't thank you for helping me on Friday.
[ No. That's not what she wants to say. But she has not the words to express how she felt at the time compared to how she feels now. ]
Reply
Reply
There. That's the unsolvable problem. Specifically, the problem she is avoiding. If a different person had come to find her-- one with tracking abilities, perhaps-- it would have made sense. But because this is Claire whose worldview is self-sufficient, who wants to protect her... she can't stop thinking about it. There must be a reason, a correlation. ]
How did you find me?
Reply
[ He considers the "how" of it seriously for a bit, looking off and scratching along his jawline in concentration. Eventually he finishes deliberating, coming to his own conclusions about the correlation. ] What I think it was is, I heard your heart callin' out to me!
Reply
Like reality. He could feel it. Fear, sensation-- the same way that she, at that time, had begun to feel his spirit in fighting for her. The same way she had experienced all the senses in Tonegawa's delusion. That recollection, the memory of it happening once before with a different person, serves to neither relieve nor confuse her further; only confirms that, for all his good intentions, Claire's last statement is likely false.
It is five minutes before she replies, delicately, still unsure. ]
I don't understand what happened then, when you heard me. I might be able to discuss this better in person.
Reply
Sure. I can meet you at your place right now, if you like?
Reply
[ Perhaps one day she'll be more appreciative of that declaration. For now, she can only think of it logically, how she didn't call for anybody. She'll be waiting in the boarding-house kitchen, front door unlocked, clinging to the feeble hope that he might understand more than she does by seeing her. ]
Reply
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