Fic: Family Arc II - 13
Title: Family Arc II - 13
Author: vic_sim
Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the plot. I apologise for any incorrect portrayal of people or any inaccurate details mentioned in my story.
Pairing: None at the moment.
Category: Angst
Rating: NC-16 (just to be safe)
Summary: The phone call. and what had happened to Kyuhyun in the past few days.
Arc I Arc II
It was a long drive to Kyuhyun’s house. They had rushed to their vans, after Eeteuk informed their manager where they were heading. He didn’t allow their manager to say anything as all twelve of them rushed past him, all wanting to get to Kyuhyun quickly. They left a rather confused manager behind who only caught “Kyuhyun”, “house” and “check on him”. He just shook his head and left them to their antics. Besides, he would not be able to chase after them now. They had simply disappeared too quickly.
Everyone piled into the two vans, throwing their bags in as well. It was a long drive to Kyuhyun’s house, although they were not that far away. It was just that their worries were making them think very pessimistically.
What if that bastard came back? It was the thought that echoed in those who knew about it.
What if he’s sick? What if he fell down? What if he had a nightmare? A lot of ‘what if’ was going through Kangin’s mind. He really didn’t know what happened and was truly anxious.
Siwon was fiddling with his cross, praying that nothing happened. He hated not knowing.
Ryeowook hung on to Yesung, seeking comfort from the unknown. Yesung too did not know how to deal with it.
Shindong stared out of the car window. His mind was blank.
The vans were silent, except for the sound of the engine moving along the road. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity for them, the house came into view. From the outside, nothing unusual seemed to have happened. The house was still standing. It was not burned down. Nor was it surrounded by police cars. Perhaps it’s not that serious. Perhaps we’re just over-reacting. Hankyung thought to himself. He had really panicked when he heard what Mdm Kim had said.
“Hello?”
“Is this Hankyung-sshi?”
“Yes, speaking. May I know who are you?” Hankyung thought that the voice sounded familiar, but he could not place it with a face or name.
“I’m Mdm Kim. Young Master Kyuhyun’s housekeeper.”
“Oh yes. Why?” It finally clicked in his mind. Hankyung had given her the number before they left the house after the picnic.
“I’m calling because I’m worried about my young master. I’m currently at my village, and he’s most likely alone in the house right now.”
“What? You mean he’s alone right now?” Hankyung could not believe his ears. He needed to verify again.
“Yes. I’m worried. I have to stay at my village longer to settle some things. So I tried calling Young Master just now to inform him that I would not be back for another week. But I could not reach him on both the house phone or his cell phone. It is not like him to not answer the phone. Especially since he’s usually at home around this time. Can you help me check on him? I’m really worried. You can get into the house via the back door if you need to. There’s a key hidden under the mat at the back door.”
“We’ll be right there to check it.” Hankyung then hung up the phone.
Hankyung could hear distinctly the worry in Mdm Kim’s voice. It in turn made him frightened as well. He knew it was not Kyuhyun’s character to make others worried about him. It was even more unlike him to have his hand phone switched off. Kyuhyun, please be fine.
Donghae rang the doorbell, praying for an answer. He could almost hear the seconds ticking away. Impatiently, he rang the doorbell again. Tic. Tic. Tic. The seconds were passing so slowly. He rang it again. There was no answer. Donghae turned around to face the rest with a helpless look on his face.
“Anyone has the house phone?” Eeteuk asked, only to receive shakes from everyone. He ran his hand through his hair. What am I going to do?
“Bummie, try calling his phone again. I don’t care if it’s switched off. Maybe it’s switched on now.”
Kibum nodded and took out his phone. He pressed the re-dial button.
“The number you’ve called is not available. Please try again later.” The phone was still switched off.
Kibum shook his head, indicating that he could not get through. Heechul felt like screaming. He turned and stared at the door with all his might, hoping that the door would miraculously open.
“Hankyung-hyung, where are you going?” Ryeowook spoke up, seeing Hankyung head to the back of the house.
Everyone’s head s swerved to Hankyung. Hankyung looked back slightly. “To the back door. Mdm Kim said that there’s a key hidden behind that we could use.”
In an instant, everyone picked up their pace and followed Hankyung to the back. Hankyung was frantically looking for the back door, mentally cursing the house for being so huge.
“There!” Siwon shouted as he pointed in front of him towards a door that was vaguely visible. Everyone rushed towards the door. Hankyung immediately bent down to the mat when he reached to find the key. He took out the key as Siwon stood in front of the door with his hand outstretched. Hankyung passed the key to Siwon.
*Click*
That was the best sound all of them had heard since they found the missed calls. Siwon pushed the door open as they rushed in.
“Alright. I’ll search the ground floor with Siwon and Shindong. Eunhyuk, Donghae and Sungmin will search the front living room and yard. The rest will search the second floor.” Kangin took charge delegating the jobs. The rest were not in the mood to argue why they were allocated where. All they wanted to do at the moment was to find Kyuhyun. They merely nodded and rushed off to their respective venue.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kangin, Siwon and Shindong searched through the kitchen and the guest room but they found no one. There were no signs of struggle, so the possibility of a kidnap or burglary was ruled out. Right now they would gladly strike out any of the terrifying possibilities of what could have happened. But Shindong was concerned about the kitchen. He had been curious and opened the fridge. It was almost empty, left only with some sweets and vegetables. It was not how a fridge should look like for someone who was recovering from a serious car accident. Seeing that upset Shindong. There was really no one here to take care of Kyuhyun.
“Let’s go upsta…” Kangin was cut off by a shout.
“Kyuhyun!”
The three looked at each other startled. Then as one, they turned and dashed up the stairs towards the voice. Fear filled their heart as they ran.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eunhyuk, Donghae and Sungmin went straight for the living room. Donghae opened all the cupboards trying to see if Kyuhyun was hiding in any one of them. Donghae did not know what had happened, but he was not going to rule out burglary or something to that extent. Eunhyuk scanned the room but could not see any shadow that looked vaguely like a human. Sungmin was looking under the sofa, not very clear on why he did that. All he knew was that he wanted to see Kyuhyun right there and then. Eunhyuk looked at Donghae who gave him a slight shake of his head. Then he turned to Sungmin who mimicked Donghae’s actions. Eunhyuk pointed to the front yard, indicating that they should head for the yard. Sungmin being the closest opened the door that led to the yard. As he was about to take a step down, his foot stopped in mid air.
“Kyuhyun!”
The shout that came from upstairs made Sungmin miss the step and fell one step down to the ground. “Ouch!”
The exclamation of pain made the pair who froze to react. “Sungmin!”
The two rushed to Sungmin. Donghae kneeled in front of Sungmin while Eunhyuk gently lifted Sungmin’s back off the ground. “Are you alright?” Donghae asked worriedly.
Sungmin nodded, rubbing his head, which hit the grass as he hit the ground. “Was that Kibum?”
“Don’t know. Are you really okay?”
Sungmin nodded. “I’m fine. Let’s go upstairs now.”
Donghae pulled Sungmin up by his arm while Eunhyuk helped to push Sungmin off the ground at the back. Sungmin patted his shirt and pants before saying, “Let’s go!”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eeteuk, Heechul, Hankyung, Yesung, Ryeowook and Kibum headed up the stairs. When they reached the top, they decided to split into two groups, one searching the left rooms and the other the right rooms.
Eeteuk, Heechul and Yesung quickly finished with one room and headed for the next further down the hallway. Yesung headed for the attached toilet to check if Kyuhyun was there while Eeteuk walked into the large walk-in wardrobe to check. Heechul walked to the bed to check beneath the bed when something on the table caught his attention. He walked to the table and picked up the packet. He stared at the writings on the label.
“Jungsu! Jongwoon!”
The two came rushing out of the toilet and wardrobe respectively, thinking that Heechul had found Kyuhyun.
“What?”
Heechul thrust the packet in front of their faces. Eeteuk’s and Yesung’s eyes bulged as they read the label.
“Flu medicine? For the mother?” Eeteuk said confusedly.
“Look at the date.” Heechul brought their attention to something else.
“It’s one week ago!” Yesung exclaimed. “Does it mean that the day Mdm Kim left the mother was ill?” Yesung left the rest of the question unspoken. They all knew the answer in their hearts.
Kyuhyun must have been taking care of her.
Heechul was now frightened. He still remembered clearly what the doctor had said about Kyuhyun.
“Kyuhyun-sshi is recovering fine. But he is still weak from his injuries, especially his lung injury. It caused his immune system to be weakened, making him extremely vulnerable to any diseases. With his injury, it would not be good for him to contract any illness, even a common flu or cough.”
Right now, Heechul’s mind was only filled with one thing - finding Kyuhyun. That was the one and only thought that was echoing in his mind.
“Kyuhyun!”
All three snapped their heads towards the door.
“Kyuhyun!”
When the shout was repeated, they knew that it was not their imagination. Heechul stuffed the packet into his pocket as they dashed towards the room.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hankyung, Ryeowook and Kibum headed for Kyuhyun’s room first, thinking that it was the place with the highest probability to find him. They gently knocked on the door, hoping that there would be an answer, any indication that Kyuhyun was there. But none came. Kibum slowly opened the door.
“Kyu?”
Kibum opened the door wide open letting the other two into the room as well. The room looked empty. Kyuhyun was not on the bed. Hankyung noticed that the blankets were thrown randomly onto the ground, as if the person got up in a hurry. Then he spotted something on the floor. He bent down to pick it up. It was Kyuhyun’s handphone. The battery was removed from the phone. Hankyung stared at the two pieces of electronic items in his hands, puzzled why they were separated. Did he remove it himself? If he did, why?
In his inspection, he did not notice that the two younger ones had wandered off to the toilet.
“Kyuhyun!” Hankyung dropped the phone and the battery on the floor when he heard the twin shouts from Kibum and Ryeowook. He dashed to the toilet.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kibum had taken a glance at the room, noticing that the elephant had fallen to the floor. It was the first sign that alerted Kibum that something was seriously wrong. He knew how much Kyuhyun treasured the elephant. Kyuhyun would not have left it on the floor if he knew. Kibum saw that the toilet door was slightly opened and pulled Ryeowook to him. Kibum pointed to the door and Ryeowook nodded at him. They walked quietly towards the toilet, a feeling of doom causing shivers in their backs. Ryeowook clenched onto Kibum’s shirt, afraid of what they might find. Kibum pushed open the door slowly. As the door inched open, Kibum and Ryeowook caught sight of a leg on the floor. Shocked, Kibum pushed the whole door open.
Kyuhyun was lying facedown on the floor, his face looking flushed and there was a pool of blood around his hand.
“Kyuhyun!”
Kibum and Ryeowook exclaimed together. Their shouts called everyone to the room.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kyuhyun painstakingly took care of his mother for the next few days. He remained by her side whenever he could, mostly at night where she didn’t notice his presence. He ate little, never in the mood for eating, and also slept little as he stayed up during the nights to take care of her.
The first night was the worst. Her fever was high and she was also delirious. Kyuhyun had fed her the medicine the doctor prescribed, but the fever was still high. Kyuhyun kept on changing the wet towel, hoping to cool her temperature.
“Honey?” A weak voice from the bed startled Kyuhyun. He looked at his mother who had tilted her head towards him.
“Honey, is that you?” Mdm Lee repeated.
Kyuhyun wanted to ask if she was feeling better, but no voice came out. His mother had never called him ‘Honey’ before.
“I’ve missed you.” Mdm Lee reached out a hand to touch Kyuhyun’s face.
Kyuhyun could feel tears forming in his eyes. Never had his mother said something like that to him, nor even touched him so lovingly.
“Can we go back to before? Before everything fell on us? Before the pregnancy?” Mdm Lee whispered, yearning to return to the years that were the best years of her life.
Kyuhyun felt a sharp pain in his chest. It was his heart shattering. He knew that he was unwanted, but it was the first time he heard his mother’s wishes. The tears rolled down his face, glistening as Kyuhyun comforted his mother.
“Yes we can. Yes we can.” Kyuhyun ran his fingers through his mother’s hair, hoping to calm her down so that she could rest and recover. It was the first time his mother had allowed such close contact from him. One part of him wanted to savour the contact that he had been deprived of all his life. He ran his hand slowly through his mother’s hair, taking in the soft and wavy texture of her hair as she snuggled a little into him.
“Can I stay here forever Honey?” His mother mumbled. Kyuhyun nodded. His mother snuggled closer to him and slowly drifted off to sleep. Tears continued roll down his eyes.
The other part of Kyuhyun wanted to shout out to his mother to look at him. He was not his father. I’m Kyuhyun! Your son! Not my father! Why don’t you look at me at all? Why? Why do you never care for me? He wanted his mother to acknowledge who he was and still accept his comfort. And not think that he was his father. He wanted his mother to look at him for who he was. He wanted for her to comfort him. He wanted her love. He wanted…he wanted…
Kyuhyun didn’t know exactly what he wanted. He only knew that his heart was breaking into tiny pieces as he held his mother’s hand and soothed her, knowing that she only allowed it because she believed he was his father.
Kyuhyun spent the night sitting by her side, comforting her, hoping that by doing so, it would ease the sound of glass breaking in his chest.
The next day, his mother was feeling better. She remembered nothing of the night before.
“What are you doing in my room?” That was the first thing that came out of her mouth when she saw Kyuhyun dozing by her bed. Kyuhyun was shaken awake by her voice.
“Mother! Are you better?” Kyuhyun sat up immediately, looking at his mother trying to look for signs of any discomfort.
“What are you doing here?” His mother repeated, before breaking into coughs. Kyuhyun reached for the medicine and a glass of water on the table. He passed it to her, only to have her hand push the glass and the medicine away. The action shocked Kyuhyun, causing the glass to drop to the ground and break into pieces. It mimicked what was happening to Kyuhyun there and then.
“I asked you what are you doing here?”
“I’ll leave right after you eat the medicine.” Kyuhyun flinched before saying softly. He took another set of medicine and water to his mother. She glared at him and snatched the medicine and water from him. She made a show of swallowing the medicine before slamming the empty glass on the table.
“Now leave.” She pointed to the door.
Kyuhyun nodded, taking a towel to pick up the broken pieces of glass on the floor. He opened the door and walked out, but not before looking back into the room, only to see his mother still glaring at him. He closed the door softly, before letting the pain appear on his face. He leaned against the door, staring into nowhere.
“Young Master?”
Kyuhyun straightened up and looked at Mr Lee with a blank face.
“These are a few documents that need to be looked through and approved.”
“Pass them to me. I’ll do it. Could you throw this away for me?” Kyuhyun took the files while passing the broken glass to him.
Mr Lee nodded and headed down the stairs. He had faith in his young master’s ability to make the right judgement. He was after all the sixteen-year-old genius who managed to come up with ideas that stunned the company’s highest management.
Kyuhyun took the files and slowly walked to his room. He spent the next few hours going through the files. Kyuhyun had always kept track of the business his mother was doing despite being thrown out of his house the day he told her that he wanted to be a singer. He knew what was going on in the company. Kyuhyun engrossed himself in the work, putting whatever that happened just now into the depths of his mind, hoping that it would stay there.
It was the same situation the next two days, as his mother recovered. She was off to the office today and she left early in the morning, not even bothered to say anything to Kyuhyun. But Kyuhyun had already suspected that she would leave for the office that day. For the past four days, Kyuhyun had not been eating and sleeping well. During the day, he was engrossed with looking through and approving the various files Mr Lee brought, not bothering to eat much. And during the night, Kyuhyun stayed by his mother’s side, cherishing the few moments he could get alone with her even if she didn’t know it at all.
Knowing that his mother had gone to the office, Kyuhyun finally allowed him to collapse on his bed. He knew that it meant that his mother was fine, so Kyuhyun gave in to his exhaustion. He lied on the bed, hiding under the blanket, shivering. He could feel the beginning symptoms of flu occurring in his body. Suddenly Kyuhyun remembered the box that Sungmin had left for him. He reached over and brought it to him. Kyuhyun touched the box tenderly. It was something Kyuhyun had given Jong Ki as a Christmas present. He opened it and looked in. Inside there were photos that Jong Ki’s mother had taken of them when he was at Jong Ki’s house. Kyuhyun took them out one by one, stroking Jong Ki’s face in the photos. He could still remember the incidents that occurred in every photo. There were also the gifts that Kyuhyun had given Jong Ki throughout the year they had known each other. Kyuhyun smiled sadly, upset that their time together was so suddenly cut off. Why did you leave me alone, Jong-hyung?
Kyuhyun pulled out a necklace. it was a pendant that Jong Ki always had on him. Kyuhyun opened the pendant. Inside, there was a photo of Jong Ki with his family, and on the other side, it was Kyuhyun. Kyuhyun was shocked. He didn’t know that he meant that much to Jong Ki. A tear dropped on his photo. It was then that Kyuhyun realised he was crying. Why Hyung? Why did you leave me? Beneath the photos there was a card.
‘Kyuhyun, you must be wondering why I’m writing a card to you. It is a birthday message for you that I want to give to you on your birthday. Thus I didn’t bring it out with me today as we celebrate your birthday. I wanted to say that I promise you that you’ll never be alone again, and I’ll never leave my little brother, no matter what happens. Here, I leave a saying to you. Happy Birthday, Dongsaeng!
“It’s better to be hated for who you are, then to be loved for who you are not.”
Love, Jong Ki.’
The tears were flowing non-stop. I’m sorry Hyung. I’m sorry. I’m sorry that you could not keep your promise because of me. But, why did you do that? Was I worth your life? Why? Why did you leave me alone? Why? Kyuhyun hugged the card as he cried.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Jong-Hyung!” A fifteen-year-old Kyuhyun exclaimed, walking quickly towards Jong Ki. He was excited. He had not seen his hyung for a while. Kyuhyun stopped in front of his hyung, waiting for Jong Ki to greet him.
“My brother was right. I should have never made friends with you. You don’t deserve it.” With that said, Jong Ki turned and left.
“Hyung? Hyung! Don’t leave me!” Kyuhyun ran up to Jong Ki pulling his hand. Jong Ki snatched his hand out of Kyuhyun’s grip and pushed him to the ground.
“Don’t ever come close to me again.” Jong Ki said angrily, before stomping away without a backward glance at Kyuhyun.
“Why Hyung? You promised to never leave me alone.” Kyuhyun sniffled to himself.
Kyuhyun morphed into a nineteen-year-old.
“Eeteuk-hyung! Donghae-hyung! Kibum-hyung!” Kyuhyun shouted as he caught sight of them. He had missed his hyungs, missed their presence. The three did not even look up at him.
“Hae-hyung! I’m Kyuhyun. Why are you ignoring me?” Kyuhyun pleaded to Donghae, who showed no indication that he saw Kyuhyun.
“Wookie-hyung! Yesung-hyung! Sungmin-hyung! Siwon-hyung! Hankyung-hyung! Kangin-hyung! Eunhyuk-hyung! Shindong-hyung!”
None of them reacted to him, until Kyuhyun reached out to grab Yesung’s hand. Yesung shook it away. Kyuhyun let his hand fall limply to his side, the hurt visible on his face.
“We don’t need you here. We started out fine as twelve and are doing fine now as twelve. There is no need for a thirteenth member. You’re unwanted here.” Kangin said before turning his back on Kyuhyun. The rest followed his example and left. Kyuhyun was stunned for a while. It was exactly what he feared that would happen. After all, he joined Super Junior only after they had made a name for Super Junior. He was just riding on their fame. But there was one part that doubted what Kangin said.
By the time Kyuhyun had come about, the rest were fading from his vision.
“Hyung! Hyung! Don’t leave me! Please don’t leave me!” Kyuhyun tried to move to chase them, but he couldn’t. He was trapped at that place where he could only see his hyungs walking away from him, leaving him alone.
Kyuhyun jerked awake, panting. He looked around him. He was in his room. He scrambled off the bed for his handphone. He stood beside his table and dialled.
Kibum-hyung, please answer the phone. There was no answer. ‘You’re unwanted.’
Kyuhyun dialled the next number. Hankyung-hyung, please. Kyuhyun got the same reply.
He dialled all twelve numbers, but every time there was no answer. Kyuhyun was starting to believe the dream. They had left me. They don’t need me. I’m alone. I’ve always been and always will be.
Kyuhyun dialled one last time to Kibum. He griped his phone tightly, as if doing so would make someone answer the phone. There was still no answer. The tears rolled down Kyuhyun’s face, his eyes red. They left me. They left me. Hyung! Why? Why did you leave me alone?
His grip loosened on his phone, letting it drop to the ground. The battery fell out of the phone upon impact. Kyuhyun started to cough from the crying. He doubled over as the cough got worse. Then suddenly, he had an urge to vomit. He rushed to the toilet, and bent down at the basin. He coughed and coughed, but no food came up. Only some water and then it was all dry coughing. Kyuhyun did not eat a lot for the past few days as he was busy taking care of his mother. Kyuhyun washed his mouth and looked up at the mirror. Throughout the whole time, the tears never stopped. Kyuhyun looked at himself in the mirror.
You’re unwanted. Why are you still bothering to see yourself in the mirror? To see the reason why people always left you? To see why they didn’t like you?
Kyuhyun punched the mirror. It shattered, just like his feelings did. He didn’t want to look at himself anymore. He didn’t want to feel anymore. Kyuhyun slid down to the floor with his hand bloodied. He felt throbbing pain from his hand in the background of his head. He could feel his consciousness leaving him.
As he fell forward to the ground, a last thought ran through his head which was the thing he crave for the most.
Hyungs, I need you. Please.
I can’t believe I wrote that dream of Kyuhyun’s! No, Super Junior would never do that in reality. It was all my imagination! It’s quite a bit of angst in this chapter. I’ll apologise beforehand if I made anyone cry. - prepares a box of tissue to hand out - Do comment!^^
Oh just something I wanted to share.
I saw this show on Sunday - The Star Golden Bell Challenge - or something like that. Yesung and Shindong were on it with I think two from SHINee - taemin and I didn’t manage to catch the other’s name. Anyway. My point of this is there was one section where they were supposed to guess something. There’s a little boy - not sure who he is cos I was busy reading the subtitles. When the emcee asked him how well he thinks SJ-H’s album will do on the music chart, he said No. 2. You could tell from Yesung’s and Shindong’s expression that they were shocked. The emcee continued to ask why. The boy said.
“Because SJ-H is only 6 people. That’s why they’re 2nd. Super Junior is thirteen people, and only with thirteen they’ll be No. 1.”
My quoting is not really exact cos I can’t really remember the exact words.
Author: vic_sim
Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the plot. I apologise for any incorrect portrayal of people or any inaccurate details mentioned in my story.
Pairing: None at the moment.
Category: Angst
Rating: NC-16 (just to be safe)
Summary: The phone call. and what had happened to Kyuhyun in the past few days.
Arc I Arc II
It was a long drive to Kyuhyun’s house. They had rushed to their vans, after Eeteuk informed their manager where they were heading. He didn’t allow their manager to say anything as all twelve of them rushed past him, all wanting to get to Kyuhyun quickly. They left a rather confused manager behind who only caught “Kyuhyun”, “house” and “check on him”. He just shook his head and left them to their antics. Besides, he would not be able to chase after them now. They had simply disappeared too quickly.
Everyone piled into the two vans, throwing their bags in as well. It was a long drive to Kyuhyun’s house, although they were not that far away. It was just that their worries were making them think very pessimistically.
What if that bastard came back? It was the thought that echoed in those who knew about it.
What if he’s sick? What if he fell down? What if he had a nightmare? A lot of ‘what if’ was going through Kangin’s mind. He really didn’t know what happened and was truly anxious.
Siwon was fiddling with his cross, praying that nothing happened. He hated not knowing.
Ryeowook hung on to Yesung, seeking comfort from the unknown. Yesung too did not know how to deal with it.
Shindong stared out of the car window. His mind was blank.
The vans were silent, except for the sound of the engine moving along the road. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity for them, the house came into view. From the outside, nothing unusual seemed to have happened. The house was still standing. It was not burned down. Nor was it surrounded by police cars. Perhaps it’s not that serious. Perhaps we’re just over-reacting. Hankyung thought to himself. He had really panicked when he heard what Mdm Kim had said.
“Hello?”
“Is this Hankyung-sshi?”
“Yes, speaking. May I know who are you?” Hankyung thought that the voice sounded familiar, but he could not place it with a face or name.
“I’m Mdm Kim. Young Master Kyuhyun’s housekeeper.”
“Oh yes. Why?” It finally clicked in his mind. Hankyung had given her the number before they left the house after the picnic.
“I’m calling because I’m worried about my young master. I’m currently at my village, and he’s most likely alone in the house right now.”
“What? You mean he’s alone right now?” Hankyung could not believe his ears. He needed to verify again.
“Yes. I’m worried. I have to stay at my village longer to settle some things. So I tried calling Young Master just now to inform him that I would not be back for another week. But I could not reach him on both the house phone or his cell phone. It is not like him to not answer the phone. Especially since he’s usually at home around this time. Can you help me check on him? I’m really worried. You can get into the house via the back door if you need to. There’s a key hidden under the mat at the back door.”
“We’ll be right there to check it.” Hankyung then hung up the phone.
Hankyung could hear distinctly the worry in Mdm Kim’s voice. It in turn made him frightened as well. He knew it was not Kyuhyun’s character to make others worried about him. It was even more unlike him to have his hand phone switched off. Kyuhyun, please be fine.
Donghae rang the doorbell, praying for an answer. He could almost hear the seconds ticking away. Impatiently, he rang the doorbell again. Tic. Tic. Tic. The seconds were passing so slowly. He rang it again. There was no answer. Donghae turned around to face the rest with a helpless look on his face.
“Anyone has the house phone?” Eeteuk asked, only to receive shakes from everyone. He ran his hand through his hair. What am I going to do?
“Bummie, try calling his phone again. I don’t care if it’s switched off. Maybe it’s switched on now.”
Kibum nodded and took out his phone. He pressed the re-dial button.
“The number you’ve called is not available. Please try again later.” The phone was still switched off.
Kibum shook his head, indicating that he could not get through. Heechul felt like screaming. He turned and stared at the door with all his might, hoping that the door would miraculously open.
“Hankyung-hyung, where are you going?” Ryeowook spoke up, seeing Hankyung head to the back of the house.
Everyone’s head s swerved to Hankyung. Hankyung looked back slightly. “To the back door. Mdm Kim said that there’s a key hidden behind that we could use.”
In an instant, everyone picked up their pace and followed Hankyung to the back. Hankyung was frantically looking for the back door, mentally cursing the house for being so huge.
“There!” Siwon shouted as he pointed in front of him towards a door that was vaguely visible. Everyone rushed towards the door. Hankyung immediately bent down to the mat when he reached to find the key. He took out the key as Siwon stood in front of the door with his hand outstretched. Hankyung passed the key to Siwon.
*Click*
That was the best sound all of them had heard since they found the missed calls. Siwon pushed the door open as they rushed in.
“Alright. I’ll search the ground floor with Siwon and Shindong. Eunhyuk, Donghae and Sungmin will search the front living room and yard. The rest will search the second floor.” Kangin took charge delegating the jobs. The rest were not in the mood to argue why they were allocated where. All they wanted to do at the moment was to find Kyuhyun. They merely nodded and rushed off to their respective venue.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kangin, Siwon and Shindong searched through the kitchen and the guest room but they found no one. There were no signs of struggle, so the possibility of a kidnap or burglary was ruled out. Right now they would gladly strike out any of the terrifying possibilities of what could have happened. But Shindong was concerned about the kitchen. He had been curious and opened the fridge. It was almost empty, left only with some sweets and vegetables. It was not how a fridge should look like for someone who was recovering from a serious car accident. Seeing that upset Shindong. There was really no one here to take care of Kyuhyun.
“Let’s go upsta…” Kangin was cut off by a shout.
“Kyuhyun!”
The three looked at each other startled. Then as one, they turned and dashed up the stairs towards the voice. Fear filled their heart as they ran.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eunhyuk, Donghae and Sungmin went straight for the living room. Donghae opened all the cupboards trying to see if Kyuhyun was hiding in any one of them. Donghae did not know what had happened, but he was not going to rule out burglary or something to that extent. Eunhyuk scanned the room but could not see any shadow that looked vaguely like a human. Sungmin was looking under the sofa, not very clear on why he did that. All he knew was that he wanted to see Kyuhyun right there and then. Eunhyuk looked at Donghae who gave him a slight shake of his head. Then he turned to Sungmin who mimicked Donghae’s actions. Eunhyuk pointed to the front yard, indicating that they should head for the yard. Sungmin being the closest opened the door that led to the yard. As he was about to take a step down, his foot stopped in mid air.
“Kyuhyun!”
The shout that came from upstairs made Sungmin miss the step and fell one step down to the ground. “Ouch!”
The exclamation of pain made the pair who froze to react. “Sungmin!”
The two rushed to Sungmin. Donghae kneeled in front of Sungmin while Eunhyuk gently lifted Sungmin’s back off the ground. “Are you alright?” Donghae asked worriedly.
Sungmin nodded, rubbing his head, which hit the grass as he hit the ground. “Was that Kibum?”
“Don’t know. Are you really okay?”
Sungmin nodded. “I’m fine. Let’s go upstairs now.”
Donghae pulled Sungmin up by his arm while Eunhyuk helped to push Sungmin off the ground at the back. Sungmin patted his shirt and pants before saying, “Let’s go!”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eeteuk, Heechul, Hankyung, Yesung, Ryeowook and Kibum headed up the stairs. When they reached the top, they decided to split into two groups, one searching the left rooms and the other the right rooms.
Eeteuk, Heechul and Yesung quickly finished with one room and headed for the next further down the hallway. Yesung headed for the attached toilet to check if Kyuhyun was there while Eeteuk walked into the large walk-in wardrobe to check. Heechul walked to the bed to check beneath the bed when something on the table caught his attention. He walked to the table and picked up the packet. He stared at the writings on the label.
“Jungsu! Jongwoon!”
The two came rushing out of the toilet and wardrobe respectively, thinking that Heechul had found Kyuhyun.
“What?”
Heechul thrust the packet in front of their faces. Eeteuk’s and Yesung’s eyes bulged as they read the label.
“Flu medicine? For the mother?” Eeteuk said confusedly.
“Look at the date.” Heechul brought their attention to something else.
“It’s one week ago!” Yesung exclaimed. “Does it mean that the day Mdm Kim left the mother was ill?” Yesung left the rest of the question unspoken. They all knew the answer in their hearts.
Kyuhyun must have been taking care of her.
Heechul was now frightened. He still remembered clearly what the doctor had said about Kyuhyun.
“Kyuhyun-sshi is recovering fine. But he is still weak from his injuries, especially his lung injury. It caused his immune system to be weakened, making him extremely vulnerable to any diseases. With his injury, it would not be good for him to contract any illness, even a common flu or cough.”
Right now, Heechul’s mind was only filled with one thing - finding Kyuhyun. That was the one and only thought that was echoing in his mind.
“Kyuhyun!”
All three snapped their heads towards the door.
“Kyuhyun!”
When the shout was repeated, they knew that it was not their imagination. Heechul stuffed the packet into his pocket as they dashed towards the room.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hankyung, Ryeowook and Kibum headed for Kyuhyun’s room first, thinking that it was the place with the highest probability to find him. They gently knocked on the door, hoping that there would be an answer, any indication that Kyuhyun was there. But none came. Kibum slowly opened the door.
“Kyu?”
Kibum opened the door wide open letting the other two into the room as well. The room looked empty. Kyuhyun was not on the bed. Hankyung noticed that the blankets were thrown randomly onto the ground, as if the person got up in a hurry. Then he spotted something on the floor. He bent down to pick it up. It was Kyuhyun’s handphone. The battery was removed from the phone. Hankyung stared at the two pieces of electronic items in his hands, puzzled why they were separated. Did he remove it himself? If he did, why?
In his inspection, he did not notice that the two younger ones had wandered off to the toilet.
“Kyuhyun!” Hankyung dropped the phone and the battery on the floor when he heard the twin shouts from Kibum and Ryeowook. He dashed to the toilet.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kibum had taken a glance at the room, noticing that the elephant had fallen to the floor. It was the first sign that alerted Kibum that something was seriously wrong. He knew how much Kyuhyun treasured the elephant. Kyuhyun would not have left it on the floor if he knew. Kibum saw that the toilet door was slightly opened and pulled Ryeowook to him. Kibum pointed to the door and Ryeowook nodded at him. They walked quietly towards the toilet, a feeling of doom causing shivers in their backs. Ryeowook clenched onto Kibum’s shirt, afraid of what they might find. Kibum pushed open the door slowly. As the door inched open, Kibum and Ryeowook caught sight of a leg on the floor. Shocked, Kibum pushed the whole door open.
Kyuhyun was lying facedown on the floor, his face looking flushed and there was a pool of blood around his hand.
“Kyuhyun!”
Kibum and Ryeowook exclaimed together. Their shouts called everyone to the room.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kyuhyun painstakingly took care of his mother for the next few days. He remained by her side whenever he could, mostly at night where she didn’t notice his presence. He ate little, never in the mood for eating, and also slept little as he stayed up during the nights to take care of her.
The first night was the worst. Her fever was high and she was also delirious. Kyuhyun had fed her the medicine the doctor prescribed, but the fever was still high. Kyuhyun kept on changing the wet towel, hoping to cool her temperature.
“Honey?” A weak voice from the bed startled Kyuhyun. He looked at his mother who had tilted her head towards him.
“Honey, is that you?” Mdm Lee repeated.
Kyuhyun wanted to ask if she was feeling better, but no voice came out. His mother had never called him ‘Honey’ before.
“I’ve missed you.” Mdm Lee reached out a hand to touch Kyuhyun’s face.
Kyuhyun could feel tears forming in his eyes. Never had his mother said something like that to him, nor even touched him so lovingly.
“Can we go back to before? Before everything fell on us? Before the pregnancy?” Mdm Lee whispered, yearning to return to the years that were the best years of her life.
Kyuhyun felt a sharp pain in his chest. It was his heart shattering. He knew that he was unwanted, but it was the first time he heard his mother’s wishes. The tears rolled down his face, glistening as Kyuhyun comforted his mother.
“Yes we can. Yes we can.” Kyuhyun ran his fingers through his mother’s hair, hoping to calm her down so that she could rest and recover. It was the first time his mother had allowed such close contact from him. One part of him wanted to savour the contact that he had been deprived of all his life. He ran his hand slowly through his mother’s hair, taking in the soft and wavy texture of her hair as she snuggled a little into him.
“Can I stay here forever Honey?” His mother mumbled. Kyuhyun nodded. His mother snuggled closer to him and slowly drifted off to sleep. Tears continued roll down his eyes.
The other part of Kyuhyun wanted to shout out to his mother to look at him. He was not his father. I’m Kyuhyun! Your son! Not my father! Why don’t you look at me at all? Why? Why do you never care for me? He wanted his mother to acknowledge who he was and still accept his comfort. And not think that he was his father. He wanted his mother to look at him for who he was. He wanted for her to comfort him. He wanted her love. He wanted…he wanted…
Kyuhyun didn’t know exactly what he wanted. He only knew that his heart was breaking into tiny pieces as he held his mother’s hand and soothed her, knowing that she only allowed it because she believed he was his father.
Kyuhyun spent the night sitting by her side, comforting her, hoping that by doing so, it would ease the sound of glass breaking in his chest.
The next day, his mother was feeling better. She remembered nothing of the night before.
“What are you doing in my room?” That was the first thing that came out of her mouth when she saw Kyuhyun dozing by her bed. Kyuhyun was shaken awake by her voice.
“Mother! Are you better?” Kyuhyun sat up immediately, looking at his mother trying to look for signs of any discomfort.
“What are you doing here?” His mother repeated, before breaking into coughs. Kyuhyun reached for the medicine and a glass of water on the table. He passed it to her, only to have her hand push the glass and the medicine away. The action shocked Kyuhyun, causing the glass to drop to the ground and break into pieces. It mimicked what was happening to Kyuhyun there and then.
“I asked you what are you doing here?”
“I’ll leave right after you eat the medicine.” Kyuhyun flinched before saying softly. He took another set of medicine and water to his mother. She glared at him and snatched the medicine and water from him. She made a show of swallowing the medicine before slamming the empty glass on the table.
“Now leave.” She pointed to the door.
Kyuhyun nodded, taking a towel to pick up the broken pieces of glass on the floor. He opened the door and walked out, but not before looking back into the room, only to see his mother still glaring at him. He closed the door softly, before letting the pain appear on his face. He leaned against the door, staring into nowhere.
“Young Master?”
Kyuhyun straightened up and looked at Mr Lee with a blank face.
“These are a few documents that need to be looked through and approved.”
“Pass them to me. I’ll do it. Could you throw this away for me?” Kyuhyun took the files while passing the broken glass to him.
Mr Lee nodded and headed down the stairs. He had faith in his young master’s ability to make the right judgement. He was after all the sixteen-year-old genius who managed to come up with ideas that stunned the company’s highest management.
Kyuhyun took the files and slowly walked to his room. He spent the next few hours going through the files. Kyuhyun had always kept track of the business his mother was doing despite being thrown out of his house the day he told her that he wanted to be a singer. He knew what was going on in the company. Kyuhyun engrossed himself in the work, putting whatever that happened just now into the depths of his mind, hoping that it would stay there.
It was the same situation the next two days, as his mother recovered. She was off to the office today and she left early in the morning, not even bothered to say anything to Kyuhyun. But Kyuhyun had already suspected that she would leave for the office that day. For the past four days, Kyuhyun had not been eating and sleeping well. During the day, he was engrossed with looking through and approving the various files Mr Lee brought, not bothering to eat much. And during the night, Kyuhyun stayed by his mother’s side, cherishing the few moments he could get alone with her even if she didn’t know it at all.
Knowing that his mother had gone to the office, Kyuhyun finally allowed him to collapse on his bed. He knew that it meant that his mother was fine, so Kyuhyun gave in to his exhaustion. He lied on the bed, hiding under the blanket, shivering. He could feel the beginning symptoms of flu occurring in his body. Suddenly Kyuhyun remembered the box that Sungmin had left for him. He reached over and brought it to him. Kyuhyun touched the box tenderly. It was something Kyuhyun had given Jong Ki as a Christmas present. He opened it and looked in. Inside there were photos that Jong Ki’s mother had taken of them when he was at Jong Ki’s house. Kyuhyun took them out one by one, stroking Jong Ki’s face in the photos. He could still remember the incidents that occurred in every photo. There were also the gifts that Kyuhyun had given Jong Ki throughout the year they had known each other. Kyuhyun smiled sadly, upset that their time together was so suddenly cut off. Why did you leave me alone, Jong-hyung?
Kyuhyun pulled out a necklace. it was a pendant that Jong Ki always had on him. Kyuhyun opened the pendant. Inside, there was a photo of Jong Ki with his family, and on the other side, it was Kyuhyun. Kyuhyun was shocked. He didn’t know that he meant that much to Jong Ki. A tear dropped on his photo. It was then that Kyuhyun realised he was crying. Why Hyung? Why did you leave me? Beneath the photos there was a card.
‘Kyuhyun, you must be wondering why I’m writing a card to you. It is a birthday message for you that I want to give to you on your birthday. Thus I didn’t bring it out with me today as we celebrate your birthday. I wanted to say that I promise you that you’ll never be alone again, and I’ll never leave my little brother, no matter what happens. Here, I leave a saying to you. Happy Birthday, Dongsaeng!
“It’s better to be hated for who you are, then to be loved for who you are not.”
Love, Jong Ki.’
The tears were flowing non-stop. I’m sorry Hyung. I’m sorry. I’m sorry that you could not keep your promise because of me. But, why did you do that? Was I worth your life? Why? Why did you leave me alone? Why? Kyuhyun hugged the card as he cried.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Jong-Hyung!” A fifteen-year-old Kyuhyun exclaimed, walking quickly towards Jong Ki. He was excited. He had not seen his hyung for a while. Kyuhyun stopped in front of his hyung, waiting for Jong Ki to greet him.
“My brother was right. I should have never made friends with you. You don’t deserve it.” With that said, Jong Ki turned and left.
“Hyung? Hyung! Don’t leave me!” Kyuhyun ran up to Jong Ki pulling his hand. Jong Ki snatched his hand out of Kyuhyun’s grip and pushed him to the ground.
“Don’t ever come close to me again.” Jong Ki said angrily, before stomping away without a backward glance at Kyuhyun.
“Why Hyung? You promised to never leave me alone.” Kyuhyun sniffled to himself.
Kyuhyun morphed into a nineteen-year-old.
“Eeteuk-hyung! Donghae-hyung! Kibum-hyung!” Kyuhyun shouted as he caught sight of them. He had missed his hyungs, missed their presence. The three did not even look up at him.
“Hae-hyung! I’m Kyuhyun. Why are you ignoring me?” Kyuhyun pleaded to Donghae, who showed no indication that he saw Kyuhyun.
“Wookie-hyung! Yesung-hyung! Sungmin-hyung! Siwon-hyung! Hankyung-hyung! Kangin-hyung! Eunhyuk-hyung! Shindong-hyung!”
None of them reacted to him, until Kyuhyun reached out to grab Yesung’s hand. Yesung shook it away. Kyuhyun let his hand fall limply to his side, the hurt visible on his face.
“We don’t need you here. We started out fine as twelve and are doing fine now as twelve. There is no need for a thirteenth member. You’re unwanted here.” Kangin said before turning his back on Kyuhyun. The rest followed his example and left. Kyuhyun was stunned for a while. It was exactly what he feared that would happen. After all, he joined Super Junior only after they had made a name for Super Junior. He was just riding on their fame. But there was one part that doubted what Kangin said.
By the time Kyuhyun had come about, the rest were fading from his vision.
“Hyung! Hyung! Don’t leave me! Please don’t leave me!” Kyuhyun tried to move to chase them, but he couldn’t. He was trapped at that place where he could only see his hyungs walking away from him, leaving him alone.
Kyuhyun jerked awake, panting. He looked around him. He was in his room. He scrambled off the bed for his handphone. He stood beside his table and dialled.
Kibum-hyung, please answer the phone. There was no answer. ‘You’re unwanted.’
Kyuhyun dialled the next number. Hankyung-hyung, please. Kyuhyun got the same reply.
He dialled all twelve numbers, but every time there was no answer. Kyuhyun was starting to believe the dream. They had left me. They don’t need me. I’m alone. I’ve always been and always will be.
Kyuhyun dialled one last time to Kibum. He griped his phone tightly, as if doing so would make someone answer the phone. There was still no answer. The tears rolled down Kyuhyun’s face, his eyes red. They left me. They left me. Hyung! Why? Why did you leave me alone?
His grip loosened on his phone, letting it drop to the ground. The battery fell out of the phone upon impact. Kyuhyun started to cough from the crying. He doubled over as the cough got worse. Then suddenly, he had an urge to vomit. He rushed to the toilet, and bent down at the basin. He coughed and coughed, but no food came up. Only some water and then it was all dry coughing. Kyuhyun did not eat a lot for the past few days as he was busy taking care of his mother. Kyuhyun washed his mouth and looked up at the mirror. Throughout the whole time, the tears never stopped. Kyuhyun looked at himself in the mirror.
You’re unwanted. Why are you still bothering to see yourself in the mirror? To see the reason why people always left you? To see why they didn’t like you?
Kyuhyun punched the mirror. It shattered, just like his feelings did. He didn’t want to look at himself anymore. He didn’t want to feel anymore. Kyuhyun slid down to the floor with his hand bloodied. He felt throbbing pain from his hand in the background of his head. He could feel his consciousness leaving him.
As he fell forward to the ground, a last thought ran through his head which was the thing he crave for the most.
Hyungs, I need you. Please.
I can’t believe I wrote that dream of Kyuhyun’s! No, Super Junior would never do that in reality. It was all my imagination! It’s quite a bit of angst in this chapter. I’ll apologise beforehand if I made anyone cry. - prepares a box of tissue to hand out - Do comment!^^
Oh just something I wanted to share.
I saw this show on Sunday - The Star Golden Bell Challenge - or something like that. Yesung and Shindong were on it with I think two from SHINee - taemin and I didn’t manage to catch the other’s name. Anyway. My point of this is there was one section where they were supposed to guess something. There’s a little boy - not sure who he is cos I was busy reading the subtitles. When the emcee asked him how well he thinks SJ-H’s album will do on the music chart, he said No. 2. You could tell from Yesung’s and Shindong’s expression that they were shocked. The emcee continued to ask why. The boy said.
“Because SJ-H is only 6 people. That’s why they’re 2nd. Super Junior is thirteen people, and only with thirteen they’ll be No. 1.”
My quoting is not really exact cos I can’t really remember the exact words.