I don't think many of us magically develop self worth during childhood: most of us have to learn it ourselves I think.
I can only tell you what works for me, because this is one of the issues I struggle with.
Over ten years ago I met two people who changed my life: Victoria who was positive, a straight forward straight talker who taught me that it felt good to say nice things about and to people, to be kind. And Tim who taught me the same thing in different ways. I grew up in a house of conflict and knew a lot about how to piss people off, I had to learn how to get on with them and it wasn't easy.
Now I'm a different person: I enjoy serving people, meeting their needs and as a result enjoy a lot of good will, even from people I don't know. It's all about respect and self-respect. And good communication. I find it nourishing and somewhat spiritual. I hope you find a way, because self worth is important to happiness.
Just after I read this post, my web wanderings took me to this bit:
Happiness and self-love are important because we need to be sane and functioning to do the great work of our lives, to make a difference, to be able to take on the tough moments that will forge us stronger and better than ever.
I think it's interesting to think of self-worth as something to cultivate not just for our own personal means and satisfaction, but as a way of being more healthy in the world--more capable of giving to others. Maybe it's easier to me to think of it as a less self-serving pursuit: I will be a better friend/neighbor/family member if I take care of myself, I will have more to give to others if I'm not all wrapped up in my own neurosis.
So yeah: compassion. Compassion for others, still and always.
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I can only tell you what works for me, because this is one of the issues I struggle with.
Over ten years ago I met two people who changed my life: Victoria who was positive, a straight forward straight talker who taught me that it felt good to say nice things about and to people, to be kind. And Tim who taught me the same thing in different ways. I grew up in a house of conflict and knew a lot about how to piss people off, I had to learn how to get on with them and it wasn't easy.
Now I'm a different person: I enjoy serving people, meeting their needs and as a result enjoy a lot of good will, even from people I don't know. It's all about respect and self-respect. And good communication. I find it nourishing and somewhat spiritual. I hope you find a way, because self worth is important to happiness.
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Happiness and self-love are important because we need to be sane and functioning to do the great work of our lives, to make a difference, to be able to take on the tough moments that will forge us stronger and better than ever.
from here: http://s.rvxn.org/2011/05/18/what-comes-after-happiness-and-loving-yourself/
I think it's interesting to think of self-worth as something to cultivate not just for our own personal means and satisfaction, but as a way of being more healthy in the world--more capable of giving to others. Maybe it's easier to me to think of it as a less self-serving pursuit: I will be a better friend/neighbor/family member if I take care of myself, I will have more to give to others if I'm not all wrapped up in my own neurosis.
So yeah: compassion. Compassion for others, still and always.
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