Россия ☭ 2

[stolinization]

 Characters: Russia; Anyone

Comments

[1776ftw]

[Just coming around the corner to see Russia harassing a local.]

...

[Staring staring staring. He's just gonna sip his soda]

Why are you bothering the local?

[stolinization]

[THAT WAS

awkward

KINDA SWEET

but most awkward]

. . . Would only be interested in meeting them to know if they are as much idiots as you.

[1776ftw]

[The awkward can never leave when these two are civil to each other.]

... They're not idiots. Red isn't. You'd like him, he has a lot of snacks. Carl's a kid but he has a big robot sister too. And a top hat. Top hats are awesome.

[... Is he really talking about introducing Russia to his friends? Oh god.]

[stolinization]

Would be nice if Russia could have sisters here as well. Then at least would have allies against foolish Capitalists.

But perhaps will come meet little America's friends. Perhaps show them the light of true freedom.

[1776ftw]

[A sneer and he huffs.]

They don't even know what communism is, dude. Stop trying to poison their minds before even meeting them.

[He won't mention the fact that they don't know what America is either.]

[stolinization]

But they will be promising to listen to Russia's jokes, Да?

[1776ftw]

... I am pretty sure they will, they're just that nice.

[This does not bode well but ah, at least he doesn't have any nukes here.]

[stolinization]

Have probably already told them all sorts of lies about Russia. Is practically Russia's duty to tell them that America is a very bad friend and will ally with them one day and invade them the next.

[1776ftw]

Only that you're a communist bastard and will kill them in their sleep. Y'know, the usual.

[stolinization]

If was wanting to kill others in sleep, would have already smothered foolish traitor. Was very close one night listening to his snoring through walls.

[1776ftw]

Man, have I told you yet today how creepy you are, dude?

[stolinization]

Ah-- Russia does not know. Many words that are coming out of mouth of America are sounding only like buzzing of fly.

[1776ftw]

[He glares.] I'll buzz your fly alright, with my fist.

[stolinization]

[A blank look

as he tries to puzzle out what in the world that means.]

[1776ftw]

[...

Yeah, he doesn't know either. The conversation was just lacking threats, he figured. Have a moment of awkward silence before he relaxes again.]

Uhm, so are you actually going to meet them?

[stolinization]

. . . Да. You will be seeing them soon?