'cause the chains I been hearing now for most of my life

[valhalla37]

Title: 'cause the chains I been hearing now for most of my life
Characters/Pairings: Daniel, Charlotte, Richard, Juliet, Ben, Eloise, ensemble. (Dan/Charlotte)
Summary: "Whatever happened, happened isn't worth anything anymore." Daniel goes to desperate lengths to save Charlotte.
Rating: PG
Word Count: 5,140
Warning: Child abduction.
Spoilers: Up to end

Comments

[inpeopleshapes]

You know I've been waiting for a fic, right??? And you did not disapoint!!! This was AWESOME. I love the idea of him following a new path, completely changing Charlotte's life, and it somehow ending up exactly the same, but still different. Idk if that makes sense, but I really really love this. It may be one of my favorite Dan/Char pieces ever, seriously. And of course Juliet would know what he did right away lmao; she always does.

So yeah, this is definitely going into my memories!

[valhalla37]

Yay! I'm so, so glad you enjoyed! :D

Yes, that totally makes sense -- in fact, that's kind of the crux of what I was going for; that it can be free will AND fate, rather than simply free will vs. fate. And of course Juliet would know, while all the men remain totally clueless, lol.

Woah, what a compliment -- thanks again so, so much for taking the time to read and offer such lovely thoughts!

[sedauny]

You scared me big time at the end there. I thought that hint with the extra bleeding was moving toward a trade-off, Dan's life for Charlotte's, and was getting defensively ticked-off in preparation for the inevitable, but no such thing. I am grateful for these two getting a chance of a happy ending, even by Dan's highly questionable means. The skips in time weren't too hard for a reader to follow; you left enough clues for me to tell when was going on. Very nicely done. And go Richard!

[valhalla37]

It's funny -- I was actually debating going down a super-angsty route (and like I mentioned to the commentator below, I don't think Dan's actions really merit a positive outcome, exactly), but I figured what's the point of time travel if WH,H is always the hard-and-fast rule?

I'm really, really pleased to hear that the narrative jumping around wasn't completely impossible to follow -- elliotsmelliot's advice from thequillstation actually came in super-handy, in terms of providing references and touchstones in each section. And yay Richard, for sure! It's intimidating to write, but I loved doing a little of his perspective.

Thanks again for the wonderful feedback!

[ozmissage]

This is such an awesome concept. I loved the interactions between Richard and Charlotte, and Juliet and Daniel. Oh, and the end! I expected the worst and then things turned out happy instead and it was kind of perfect. You did such a wonderful job with this!

[valhalla37]

Thank you so much! I'm so glad to hear those interactions worked for you -- obviously it's Dan/Charlotte-centric, but by the end I was almost as equally interested in the dynamics between Richard and Charlotte, and Dan and Juliet (I see both relationships as kind of parental, in a stand-in kind of way).

And yay -- happy I was able to throw you for a bit of a loop. ;P I'm still not convinced Dan deserves a happy ending per se, but I'm still glad my muse decided to give him one.

[buongiornodaisy]

I am in awe over how well thought-out and executed your stories are. They always come full circle. Brava!

[valhalla37]

Thank you so, so, so much -- that's an incredible comment to receive regardless, but it means a million times more coming from a fellow writer. :)

[elliotsmelliot]

This was amazing! First, I loved how you told the story with the looping timeline. Not only did you create a new story, you filled in Dan's grief. Secondly, I love how you had Daniel's actions be so much more sensible (and yet reckless) than we saw in S5. At the same time you made Charlotte story worthwhile and more than an appendage of Dan's. This made her homecoming a lot more meaningful. And finally, I loved that you allowed Dan and Charlotte a happy ending. As you mentioned to another commenter, what's the good of time travel if you can't make things right. I also loved the Juliet bits and her fitting accusation of Dan's selfishness. Great work!

[valhalla37]

Thank you so much! I was worried this would come out a little too plot-ty and conceptually confusing, so I'm really glad to hear you thought it worked -- and thanks again for the advice on how to keep things flowing and the reader connected through the skips in time; it really, really helped