Bad Enough For You: Chapter 19

Jan 19, 2012 19:31

Title: Bad Enough For You.
Chapter: 19
Chapter's title: I'll just smile and make believe I don't feel a thing.
Author: valeohyeah
Pairing: Jalex
Rating: PG-13
Summary: If being a jerk was what Jack needed to get Alex to realise he liked him then god dammit, the jerkest jerk he would become.
Disclaimer: This story is as real as my massive lady penis. Title goes to "Bad Enough For You" by All Time Low and the chapter's title is from "Oh Well Oh Well" by Mayday Parade.

Masterpost

One week. One fucking week. Seven days. 168 hours had passed since Alex had last spoken to Jack, and as far as he knew, they were indeed broken up.

It had crushed Jack, to be honest. In the excitement of having the blonde boy right where he wanted him he hadn't thought or planned what would he do if he ever crossed the line, just like he had done now. Rian and Zack weren't helping him, either. Zack had forgiven him but it was obvious that he was on Alex's side, and Rian, being his motherly old self, was always trying to bring them together so that they would talk things through, make up and move on.

If only it was that easy.

"Are we going to Gabe's party tonight?" Rian whispered Jack, leaning into his seat and eyeing Mrs. Johnson. They were in their Friday's History class, and only five minutes away from their first weekend after winter break.

"I don't know," Jack sighed, rubbing at his face with the palm of his hand. "Is Alex coming?"

"He is, I talked to him during Study Hall." Rian replied, and that was both something that cheered Jack up a little and something that made his stomach churn with a weird feeling.

Had Alex moved on if he was already going to parties without even thinking it twice?

**

Now, on the other hand, Alex was fine. Really, Alex was fine. Alex was peachy. Alex was not crying on the floor over a guy that seemed to be just like every other guy.

Alex was seriously fine.

Only not really. Because believe it or not, Alex could never really put Jack in the same bag he put all of his exes, he could never compare him to any of them for as much as he tried to do it all the time, he could never stop wanting the dark-haired boy in his life. This? Well, this was just a speed bump that they needed to work on. Rather sooner than later, if it was possible.

**

"What if it upsets Alex that I'm going?" Jack asked, biting his lip. It was about half past ten and Rian and Jack were on the elder's car, going to the party.

"It won't, because he must know that you're going, it's a Friday night, Jay."

"Yeah... you're probably right." Jack hummed.

The rest of the car ride was spent in a comfortable but yet kinda anxious silence, the only thing being heard was Blink 182 playing on the radio. Once they reached Gabe's house Rian parked the car on one of the few free spots left of the street and looked at Jack.

"Are you gonna pull off some jerk move?" He bluntly asked, making the younger boy frown.

"Why would I do that?" He snickered, feeling like that was the stupidest question he could have ever asked.

And it certainly was, because Rian looked at him with raised eyebrows, rolled his eyes, shook his head and got out of the car, waiting for Jack to get out too so that he could lock the vehicle and walk into the house with loud rap music that dazed them and a strong smell of smoke that filled their nostrils as several people made their way towards the two boys to greet them.

"Have you seen Alex?" Was the first thing Jack asked everybody that approached him, whether it was to flirt with him or offer him a drink or talk to him about school he didn’t care, he just wanted to find the blonde boy and make everything better. If only he could at least spot him in the mass of high schoolers dancing and grinding on each other and drinking and smoking.

"I need a drink, Ri. I'll- uh... I'll see you later," he told his friend, who was cheerfully talking to his girlfriend and drinking from her red Solo cup. Rian smiled and nodded, waving him goodbye and immediately getting lost in the dozens of dancing bodies.

The dark-haired boy made his way towards the kitchen, fist bumping a few jocks, smiling to some girls that called him and mostly trying to find Alex... was he with someone else? Was he dancing? Was he upstairs 'getting to know' with somebody else...?

"Jack, amigo! Qué bueno que hayas venido." Gabe saluted him, handing him a cup that seemed to be filled with plain whisky. Jack smiled a little awkwardly and accepted the drink. Apparently Gabe was too drunk to speak in English anymore.

"Yeah... thanks. Hey, have you seen Alex?" He asked, taking a long gulp of his drink and grimacing when the golden liquid burned his throat.

"Ah, Alejandro, Alejandro... Afuera, creo." Jack didn't have the patience right now to be translating whatever bullshit the taller guy was telling him, and he huffed.

"English, dude, English! Have you see Alex?" He asked again, frowning.

"I told you I saw him outside." Gabe slurred happily, already used to people snapping at him for his Spanish outbursts. Jack sighed in relief and smiled apologetically at his friend, who was already checking out Zack's girlfriend's ass from where he and Jack were a few feet away from the two teenagers making out.

"Thanks, man. Great party!" He exclaimed, patting the Uruguayan boy's back and quickly walking out of the kitchen and to the backyard, where a few groups of people were animatedly talking and drinking. Jack also noticed a few couples making out by the bushes, and he immediately searched for that blonde messy hair and that round ass framed in skinny jeans, fearing for the worst.

"Hey, Jack," the dark-haired boy heard a shy velvet voice that sent goosebumps down his arms and made his stomach feel funny with butterflies. Jack quickly turned around to see his very own Alex standing there, a little sheepishly and with a red cup in hand, looking at him.

"Hey," Jack said, a little high-pitched due to the effects of the alcohol already coursing through his veins. "I was looking for you." He confessed. Alex shot him a little smile and sat down on the steps that lead back into the house, a clear invitation for the younger boy to mirror his actions evident in his eyes.

"So... how have you been?" Jack asked awkwardly after a few minutes, taking a sip of his cup. He was really all about stupid questions that night, it had been, after all, only a week since they last had spoken, but Zack wouldn't tell him a thing about the blonde boy and Rian didn't wanna have anything to do with the couple anymore, so Jack had to go through a whole fucking week without knowing a thing about the boy's life.

"I've been good, I guess," he shrugged, playing with the white strand of his red hoodie.

"Good..." There was a really tense silence that none of the boys knew how to put an end to. How had they come to that point? They used to always have the words to fill the empty spaces, and they didn't even need to always be chitchatting, for their silences were never awkward ones... one would think that having their dick up someone's ass and then having a fight with said someone made everything uncomfortable in between the two of them, if you saw Alex and Jack in that very same moment.

Only Jack was exaggerating everything, or so he hoped.

"Listen, Lex. I- uh, I wanted to apologise for acting like a prick last Fr-"

"Save it, I forgive you," the elder shrugged, looking away. Jack's eyes snapped open and stared at Alex in disbelief. "Really, I do." Okay, what the fuck? Jack knew the blonde boy tend to get back together with his boyfriends pretty easily, but that easily?

"Does that mean that we-" he was cut off again, however.

"I wanna go back to being best friends, Jack. I... it- we both got hurt last Friday night and it sucked. I've seen you around the hallways and in classes, Jay. You were as crushed as I was, and I'd really like my best friend back." Alex's voice was void of emotions, and Jack was usually so good at reading his best friend-turned-boyfriend that it scared him, let alone the fact that Alex was literally breaking everything off with him. He had let his chance pass by not knowing how to control himself and his actions and now there was nothing he could do but to weakly nod and offer a hint of a sad smile, trying not to let the tears that were burning his dark eyes fall.

It sucked that Alex wanted everything to go back to where it was a few months ago, but he preferred it that way, if that meant that he was able to keep Alex in his life.

That didn't mean it wouldn't hurt like shit.

"Excuse me, I... I gotta go to- uh... bathroom. Yeah," he mumbled, standing up and looking at the boy he loved so much, not being capable of hiding the pained expression that made Alex's stomach twist in discomfort. "See you around," he then said, walking away before the elder had the chance to speak.

Everything went by in a blur after that. Grabbing a bottle of tequila, ignoring Gabe and his drunken Spanish words, avoiding Zack's glare, feeling his cheeks wet with tears, climbing up the stairs, ignoring Rian's worried look, finding an empty room and sitting down on the bed near the window, unscrewing the cap of the bottle and taking a long gulp of the transparent drink.

Weren't they great as boyfriend and boyfriend?

Swig.

Hadn't they had fun?

Gulp.

Weren't their nights together so amazing they made both of their stomachs pool with unbearable heat and butterflies and even fucking dragons?

Remember he brought a shot glass with him. Shot.

Wasn't a douchebag and a jerk and an asshole and a prick what Alex was looking for in Jack?

Fuck, he really should have brought some lime with him. Shot.

Why in hell would Alex wanna go back to the friend zone when they were so amazing together?

Shot.

Alex should have been fucking grateful that Jack had been interested in him, Jack was a zillion times better than all of Alex's ex-fucking-boyfriends.

Shot.

There was no way this could be true, Alex must had been bluffing when he said he wanted them to be 'just friends' again.

Shot.

Jack shouldn't go down without a fight, though.

Shot.

He should fight for what he wants.

Half shot.

He is gonna fight for what he wants. And that is Alex.

The bottle is empty, but the alcohol is already blurring his mind and making him wobbly.

He should probably get out of that room (Gabe's most likely, because of all the band posters covering the walls), find Alex and speak his mind. Or slur it, given his state of drunkenness.

**

Breaking it off with Jack had been the right option. Yes... it had. Yeah...

It hadn't.

Well, of course it hadn't. But there wasn't much Alex could do now, was there? He couldn't just go and take back what he had said, he had seen in his best friend's eyes the pain and yet he had done nothing to make it all better.

No, he did the hard thing, but the wise one as well. Jack would heal, eventually. And so would Alex, and they would go back to the way things were before the 'bad Jack' came along, and before Alex fell for him, his best friend, and before Zack and Rian had taken sides... and he would go back to dating men that made him feel wanted and desired and he would have fun with them and leave them when they bored him and everything would go back to the initial never-ending cycle and the old broken record would start playing again.

Anything to get his Jack back.

Although, if officially breaking up with Jack was the right thing to do... why did it hurt so much? Why did looking at Jack's crushed eyes felt like a thousand knives stabbing at him? Why was there a strange force constricting his throat that wouldn't let him take not even one deep breath?

"Everything will get better," that's what he kept repeating to himself, holding a can of beer and taking long gulps from it until it was empty, and the whole reason of coming to this party was to try and have a good time, to try and go back to the way things were with his best friend, to have fun.

But was this the way of having a good time? Locked inside a bathroom, empty cans of beer surrounding him on the floor, head spinning out of control and tears rolling down his cheeks and reminding him of how good Jack used to be at making his pain go away?

"Alex, Alex let me in." Came Zack's strong and yet calm voice from behind the door, and the blonde boy ignored his friend as best as he could, he had more important things to do, like downing his fifth beer.

And so he did, he did finish his fifth beer, and a sixth, and a seventh, and half of the eighth before a weak voice made his heart stop.

"L-Lex, please let me in." Jack. Jack Jack Jack. That voice was what made the elder stand up and unlock the door handle, and the loud music confused him for a few seconds before it was gone, and it was replaced by strong and yet skinny arms wrapping around him, and that overwhelming scent that calmed him down immediately.

"I-I'm sorry..." the younger boy whimpered. "Baby, I’m so, so sorry" he slurred in Alex's ear, squeezing the boy's waist and trying not to sob in front of him. "You can't leave me, you can't do this to me, you can't tell me you want to go back to being just friends out of the blue."

Alex sighed in relief and wrapped his arms around Jack's neck, burying his nose in the younger's hair. Fuck doing what was right, fuck being wise. This, this felt right.

"O-okay, yeah. Let's, let's just go back to the beginning. Let's start over." He felt Jack squeeze harder when he squeezed harder, he didn't wanna let go of him just yet, he was not gonna give up that easily, now he realised it.

"I'll change, I swear to God I'll change, I'll be better for you," Jack mumbled, burying his face in Alex's shoulder.

And that's where it all hit him; did Alex really want Jack to change? The whole point of breaking up with the younger boy was for him to go back to his old self, but now that they weren't gonna break things off, he didn't really want him to return to the lovey dovey days, now did he?

Clearly not. But how exactly could he state that?

Exactly.

So he just smiled and nuzzled his nose into his now again boyfriend's neck.

He'd deal with whatever had to come whenever the fucking buzz in his head stopped.

Next chapter.

☠ • ☠ • ☠ • ☠ • ☠ • ☠ • ☠ • ☠ • ☠ • ☠ • ☠ • ☠ • ☠ • ☠ • ☠

Author's Notes: Hello there! Sorry for the lack of updates, I couldn't find a computer with Internet connection and I come back to a stupid Internet being a bitch. Fucking SOPA (fun fact, SOPA means soup in Spanish) :'( But I'm here now! And updates will start being frequent again (if the Internet allows it).
So... Alex and Jack make up... for how long, though?
Also, here we introduce Gabe, MY HOMEBOY! He had to be included in a high school fanfic as the school's alcoholic because good parties make Gabes go bad lmao.

Now the translations for those who know no Spanish:
Jack, amigo! Qué bueno que hayas venido: Jack, dude! Glad you could make it, man.
Ah, Alejandro, Alejandro... Afuera, creo: Ah, Alex, Alex... Outside, I believe.

Leave me some sexy pick-up lines? I need some serious Internet flirting ;)

rating: pg-13, chaptered: bad enough for you, fandom: all time low, pairing: jalex

Previous post Next post
Up