The really interesting thing about James Bond is that he would be what I call the ideal defector. Because if the money was better, the boooze freer and women easier over there in Moscow, he'd be off like a shot. Bond, you see, is the ultimate prostitute.
- Captain Darling: Me, a German spy? I'm as British as Queen Victoria! - Captain Blackadder: So your father's German, you're half German, and you married a German!
Malcolm Muggeridge was the worst spy I ever recruted. He once claimed that through his own efficient intelligence network he had effected the sinking of a german U-boat in the Mediterranean. Impossible. It must have been a very large fish. Probably a tuna.
I've buried a time-capsule containing large samples of dynamite, gunpowder and nitroglycerin. It's set to go off in the year 3000. That should show people living in the future what we are really like.