Quixotic prompt from The Flame

[unnameduntamed]

Okay, doing an A/N for the first time on my LJ work. Just promising there will be a twist at the end... The story feels too lovey-dovey if I don't mention that.

***

“Other men said they have seen angels, 
But I have seen thee 
And thou art enough. 
~ by G. Moore ~”

Meg smiled at the text. Lucas was always so romantic! This was just one of many examples

Comments

[ayumidah]

Ooh that was creepy. Liked it though. Good luck!

[moo_marie]

Bonus points on the creepy front.

[osoreranai]

That ending line? Perfect. Sets it off awesomely.

[vyvyan_wilde]

That was great :3
I thought it was a little odd the way she was so into him and how she described his parfection, but I wasn't expecting that. Awesome creepyness!

[mister_troper]

Hi, I'm one of your editors!

Yep, you got the creepy on. I'm going to be a bit more quick about the notes than general, because this tends towards more of a structural issue than anything else. It's a little awkwardly sized for what it's doing. If there aren't any actually relevant facts about Meg and her friends for the climax, we don't need as much of the lead in. On the other hand, because of what it is, you could also draw this out to a much greater length, so as to really build the "horror in both directions," to the murder and from the murder.

What's good is that you do have the voice and the pacing down. The sense is of sliding with Meg into crazy, not just seeing here there. That's good work.