Truth and Beauty, Beauty and Truth

[unmaker]

"Talking to you is like having sex."

That's what she said to me on Tuesday. Who she is exactly, I won't say. You might not want to know. Suffice it to say that she isn't on my friend's list and wouldn't be anyone you'd be likely to guess. Anyway, you'd think I'd be flattered. It's probably the sexiest compliment I've ever received, and was

Comments

[outofservice]

I must agree with you on this point. I have had numerous men tell me "god you're beautiful" but am I flattered? not one bit, because I know they dont mean it, they just think im an easy mark and a little bit of compliments will get me to fuck them. keep moving pal.
I believe in love but I think its MUCH more rare than society would lead us to believe. Love doesnt have to ply you with cheap drinks or cheap words but just exists and accepts what just IS

[museumgirl]

I am so 100% right there with you on all counts.

[unmaker]

You like a little testosterone with your gray matter, do you? :-)

[museumgirl]

As a matter of fact, I do, or that is to say, I like a little testosterone with my partner's gray matter! :)

[tragicallyjulia]

"In the past I've had considerable trouble convincing girls that I was on the up and up. Intelligent women (which are my preference) tend to be suspicious of pretty words."

Indeed. I am definitely more intelligent than I could ever be considered 'beautiful' and I've scorned most men who would use such an ill-chosen word on me. My exception is the man who wants to believe it himself. Who thinks he must describe the woman he loves as "beautiful," because she is what he wants and he likes looking at her. I'm not sure he realizes it... but in any case, I make the exception.

[unmaker]

"...because she is what he wants and he likes looking at her."

But but but... that's the very definition of beauty!

Beautiful (Adj.) 1 : having qualities of beauty, exciting aesthetic pleasure, 2 : generally pleasing.

If someone "likes looking" at you, then you're seen as beautiful. Beauty is a pleasurable experience. If the pleasure exists, beauty exists... in the eye of the beholder.

As for objective beauty...

I would, however, argue that there are certain qualities, some established by nature, others by culture, which increase the likelihood of someone being seen as beautiful.

And I don't want to shock you, or earn your scorn, but you DO possess one or more of these aforementioned qualities. And I can't possibly phrase that compliment any less prettily.

[tragicallyjulia]

"If someone "likes looking" at you, then you're seen as beautiful. Beauty is a pleasurable experience. If the pleasure exists, beauty exists... in the eye of the beholder."

Well call me a monkey's uncle! No, wait... ;-)

"I would, however, argue that there are certain qualities, some established by nature, others by culture, which increase the likelihood of someone being seen as beautiful."

Agreed. I guess I'm just so used to the combined biological and cultural standards being the only qualifiers of beauty for most people that when someone expresses preferences outside of those... I am quite suspicious.

"And I don't want to shock you, or earn your scorn, but you DO possess one or more of these aforementioned qualities. And I can't possibly phrase that compliment any less prettily."

That's very kind. It's more of a matter of my photographic skills than my physical appearance, but I appreciate your words and I do believe they're genuine... if only 'cause I don't believe you'd bullshit when commenting on this entry! ;-)

[unmaker]

While I'm sure you're an excellent photographer, I seriously doubt you could make something of nothing - not without some serious photoshopping. I'm being neither kind nor maniplative. I'm simply stating the obvious.

[unmaker]

Er, manipulative rather.

[tragicallyjulia]

You're right - the only photoshopping I've done is futzing with color balance when I want something more *cough* "artsy."

So to refer back to your earlier comment:
"but you DO possess one or more of these aforementioned qualities."

When I really think about it, I suppose you're correct - especially considering just about everyone has some characteristics that are culturally considered to be beautiful. I was generalizing before: just hearing the "beautiful" part and not "possessing certain qualities." Big difference. So I'll stop arguing. :-)