30 Kisses fic, and a related contemplation

[umadoshi]

Deadline met with a few days to spare--"The Map of Her Body" is up in this post. This one, as you may have gathered, has been in the works for *months* . . . which is a bit sad, since it clocks in at only 640 words. (I can't remember whether the title clicked for me first as a name for this piece, or for this icon, but I know it's been many

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[hezziwig]

I know that even as a woman, for me it's not so much the thinness as the overall smallness that attracts. It pulls out one's protective urges, and even when it sends a shiver through me, I can see how at the same time it touches on that power/violence dynamic. Violence is straightforward in its own horrible way.

I was talking to a friend last night about hierarchical orders and one's place in them, how women often unwittingly disturb the hierarchical orders of men, and how men read the signs of hierarchy. Violence as a part of hierarchy is deeply imbedded and has its own sort of caveman logic: "I don't like you", "You make me mad", and "I'm frustrated" -- which somehow becomes (more) acceptable when exhibited by the strongest party.

[umadoshi]

It pulls out one's protective urges, and even when it sends a shiver through me, I can see how at the same time it touches on that power/violence dynamic.

*nods* I like that way of phrasing it.

[snapdragon76]

You know, I mentioned this very thing when I was reading the kiss. The focus on Rin's physical self. I thought, "I wonder if she's aware of this sort of recurring theme in a lot of the fics she writes." Then I thought, "Well, she must, since she's writing them." I didn't know if it was intentional or not. I mean, I know Haru is very observant and is worried for her and all of that.

And I realize I am utterly ineloquent when it comes to responding to this sort of thing. I mean, I know what I feel, but it's hard for me to properly express them, so forgive me if my point isn't very clear. It isn't very clear to me as well.

[umadoshi]

I think it wasn't always intentional--I don't tend to sit and think of what I'm going to write "about" unless I'm working out actual plot, so it's more than I notice recurring patterns after they've been in place for a while. (Kind of like when I suddenly realize I've been overusing a word, and then I chop it entirely out of my vocabulary for a while.)