Finally...When she was bad
First off I would like to apologize in not having this out sooner. I had a major chunk of this written before my funk and finally by some act of God was able to finish it yesterday. It's kinda funny really since my horoscope said my muse would be visiting. And boy did he. So let me know what you guys think!!
We Belong Together
By: Jerzeyanjel
Episode: When she was bad
Summary: What if Spike came to LA while Buffy was visiting her father?
Rating: R
Disclaimer: As always I own nothing…only the fantasies of Spike I create in my brain but even then I don’t own him. :: damn ::
Author's Note: Thanks ever so to
spikeskat for her beta abilities. Without her eyes my ficage would be nothing. And also to
spikeshunny for the delicious banner and icon to accompany this fic. Thank you ladies you both spoil me soo rotten!! :: huge hugs :: Lyrics are Far Away by Nickelback.
We Belong Together
The same pasty, wrinkled face complete with long sharp fangs haunted her dreams all summer long. Every time her eyelids would close, eyes of blood red would stare back at her. She hadn’t slept a whole night through since her “death.” Since the night she punched Giles in the jaw and knocked him out cold. Since the night she put on the white prom dress and gazed at herself in the mirror. The night the Master bested her, his fangs slicing into the tender flesh of her throat and drawing out her essence. Throwing her lifeless body into a shallow puddle of clear water and leaving her for dead.
“When a slayer dies, another is called.”
Not so important to be the chosen one was it?
These special girls can be replaced immediately like nothing at all. Almost as if they’re robots doing the dirty work for the Watcher’s Council, and in reality they were.
When Buffy’s eyes had opened, it was Xander’s face staring worriedly back at her. It was his hands that held her to him, and it was Angel who sat beside him, unable to do anything at all. Angel equals vampire, vampire equals death, death equals the ability NOT to breathe. How could Angel have saved her? Instead he was pushed aside by the mortal man, his breath alone the saver of her life.
She did defeat the Master that night, dusting his flesh and whitening his bones. Forever changing how she would view vampires, and herself.
Her whole summer thereafter was spent at her father’s house in LA. Shopping and spending money, keeping herself closed off, not relaying what she was feeling, what she was thinking. What her father thought, Buffy had no idea, and oddly, she found herself not caring either way. When he would go to bed at night she would wander the streets, looking for something, anything, to beat on, to take away the rage flowing through her veins.
Not one demon, vampire, monster in any shape came across her path. It seemed as if the demon world had gone into hiding, as if they knew Buffy the vampire slayer, killer of the Master, head of the line of Aurelius, was in town. She laughed bitterly thinking of the demons shaking in fear within their homes.
Buffy’s anger burned so brightly she damn near glowed in the dark. Her thoughts consuming her, busying her mind with what ifs and whys. So intent with her concentration she ran unawares into a wall of black leather. Hands grasped at her shoulders as she pulled back, her eyes meeting those of a violent blue.
Spike stared back at the girl, sensing the anger and sadness within her. An odd feeling came over him and instead of his usual vampire see, vampire want, vampire kill motto; his dead heart softened and he silently cursed his inner William.
Little did Buffy know, she had run into another vampire of the Aurelius line. The next deadliest vampire next to Angel. But as they stared at one another, all Buffy wanted to do was burst into tears. To finally release the anger, and every other emotion, she was feeling.
Release…that’s what she craved, what she needed.
Her green eyes welled with the uncontrolled turmoil reeling inside her and a broken sob escaped her closed lips.
Spike blinked at her. Never in his life had he come across a woman who would burst into tears right in front of him, a woman he didn’t even know. He found his hands pulling her in, wrapping tightly around her as she sobbed into his leather duster and soaked the red silk shirt underneath. Her tears fiery hot on his skin, leaving her mark on him that would change their destinies.
They stood that way, his strong arms around her as she clutched at his jacket, her knuckles white with the severity of her emotions, for what seemed like an eternity. The moon rose higher in the sky before she finally lifted her head from his chest. She peered up at him; her green eyes bright, her face glistening with her spent tears. Spike was helpless, kicking himself even as he bent his head, his mouth softly meeting hers.
Buffy let out a muffled sound as the softest of lips descended delicately against hers. He pressed his lips to hers, caressing her mouth more than kissing it. He broke away with a gasp of breath, a shiver of want running through his body.
Buffy was shocked at her own response to his kiss, her body aflame with desire from the tenderness of his touch. She lifted herself onto her tiptoes and pressed her mouth more firmly against his.
Spike growled low in his throat as her small arms wound around his neck, pulling the soft hair at the nape of his neck, drawing his kiss deeper. He ran his tongue along the seal of her mouth, demanding entrance.
Buffy granted him that and sighed against him and thrilled as he gripped her to him almost painfully, desperately.
There were no words needed between them, the kisses exchanged were more than enough.
~*~
Buffy hated being back home in Sunnydale. It was nothing but a toxic mess of bad memories. Everywhere she turned she saw the Master, coming at her, staring at her, mocking her. Willow and Xander tried to be helpful but all they were doing was annoying her. She had even resorted to spiteful comments at both their expenses and still they were there like two overfed puppy dogs.
It was annoying.
Angel was just as bad, following her to the point of stalking. Showing up at her bedroom window, his brooding presence making her even angrier than she already was. Last night he had come to her window and watched her. When she felt the creepy crawlies, she’d known it was him but caressed the stake hidden beneath her mattress anyway, wanting nothing more than to bury it in his chest.
Buffy just wished he would get the hint and leave her alone.
That everyone would just leave her alone.
Giles had suggested they get back into their training schedule and Buffy jumped at it. Wanting nothing more than to beat the shit out of something, longing for more release from her turbulent emotions.
Release.
She hadn’t seen the blond man since that night in L.A. His kisses were forever burnt in her memory, and she hadn’t been able to stop thinking about him since he’d left her alone on her father’s front porch in the glimmering twilight. She had never felt that way before. Within the circle of his arms she’d found an unlikely sanctuary, and she had needed it; she had needed his comfort and his kisses. His caress was something she knew she would never stop craving.
Her dreams weren’t so full of the Master anymore, they weren’t nightmarish hells. They were full of him. The blond man who took care of her and comforted her in a way that she would never forget. He haunted her dreams now, her mind, her fantasies.
She still had an occassional nightmare, but most of the time they ended with her being saved by the blond man and not dying at the hands of the Master. Even in her dreams he radiated strength, defying the Master and killing him in one fell swoop, imbedding her favorite stake deep in the ancient vampire’s heart and then decapitating him.
This time when she woke up in a tangle of sheets and sweaty limbs, Buffy wasn’t fighting for her life; it wasn’t hell that she was escaping. It was the sweet dream of him, kissing her, caressing her form and making love to her. Creating immense amounts of pleasure, pleasure like waves within her body causing her to sail over the edge, leaving her trembling with desire.
Her body on fire with need for…him.
~*~
As soon as he passed over the Sunnydale city limits, he felt it. Felt his sire, the great poof, the giant forehead. Spike snickered, wondering why Angelus would want to hang out in this sad little town. Sure it was the hellmouth but Angel’s fun vampire days were over with his soul so why stay here? Why hang out in place that you couldn’t have fun in?
What better place can one brood?
The hellmouth sang through Spike’s veins. Sure it had been fun in LA, meeting up with his old demon friends and playing poker, Drusilla getting all crazy being back in California. But they had been so boring, they were all terrified inside their homes. Only Spike ventured out in the dark night to explore, the others staying home, scared the slayer would get to them. Word was out that she was nuts, that she had almost died at the hands of the Master, none knowing the real truth. Spike laughed ruefully as the rumors were told to him.
The slayer scaring hundreds of demons into their respective hidey-holes?
It was almost too much for Spike to believe.
So Spike had looked into it, wanting to see this slayer for himself. He’d roamed all around the huge town looking for the girl for weeks, never once seeing her. Drusilla would often ask why he went out so much, and never killed anything. Spike would have no answer and said simply, just wanted to check out this bloody town.
Spike was bored being in LA and was just about to leave the night the blond girl crashed into him. She looked so sad, so drained, and Spike felt horrible for her. Completely unknowing in why she was in such a state. All he wanted to do was wrap his arms around her and comfort her. It was a feeling Spike, William the Bloody, had never experienced, not even for his dark princess, Drusilla. So he gave in, sliding his arms around her and letting her sob against him.
When he returned back to his lair that morning Drusilla had been pissed, the fairies in her head telling her he had been with another woman. Dru ranted and raved, jealousy flowing through her like a river.
My William! She had screamed before packing up Miss Edith and telling him she couldn’t be with him anymore.
Spike was so shocked, he just laughed. Laughed good and hard until his sides hurt and tears streamed down his face. This enraged Dru more and she left, slamming the heavy door behind her. Spike knew he should be sad but he couldn’t bring himself to feel the sorrow he was supposed to have.
*~*
Willow and Xander had told Buffy where they had buried the Master’s bones, which wasn’t exactly the highest point of their intelligence. Every night during patrol Buffy would walk to the cemetery and stare at the tree he was buried beneath. Sometimes she would talk; sometimes she would just stand there and stare at the wooden cross, anger coursing through her veins. Kicking herself for allowing her death, for allowing this monster to overpower her.
Giles had assured her that his bones couldn’t be touched, that they had taken great measures in making sure the anointed one and his minions wouldn’t be able to get them. But on that particular night, as Buffy passed by the tree, she noticed the dirt disturbed and the bones gone. A flash of fear struck her and she began to shake with rage. Angry, not at the vampire, but at Giles and her friends for allowing this to happen.
The next morning at school, she saw Giles talking to Willow and Xander, and Buffy had to swallow the angry retorts she was dying to throw at them. Plastering a fake smile on her face, she approached them.
“Trout? Trout! Yes, trout is a fish. Good Morning. Did you sleep well?” Giles asked turning to Buffy.
“Like a rock. The Master is gone,” she answered dryly.
“I’m sorry?”
“The Master. I went to by his grave last night, and they have a vacancy.”
“Good God!” Giles exclaimed.
“What would somebody want with the Master’s bones?” Willow asked.
“A trophy, a horrible conversation piece?” Xander guessed.
“They’re going to bring him back. They’re gonna bring the Master back to live, and I seem to recall you telling me he was history.”
“Buffy, I-I-I’ve never heard of a-a revivification ritual being successful,” Giles stammered.
“But you’ve heard of them? Thanks for the warning,” Buffy said angrily.
“Well, Buffy, Giles did bury him and…” Willow started.
“Look, this is slayer stuff, okay? Could we have just a little less from the civilians, please?”
“Okay, that’s just about enough!” Xander huffed, jumping to Willow’s defense.
Buffy shot Xander a look that could have eviscerated his skin.
Willow’s gaze wavered between the two, angry that Buffy was being mean and happy because Xander stuck up for her.
“Buffy…” she started.
“You know what? No. I just said it was slayer stuff. Why can’t you guys just deal with that? I’m done with this,” Buffy said turning and walking away, leaving the three to stare after her, their mouths open in shock.
“She’s taking this harder than we thought,” Xander commented.
“You think so? I thought that was quite obvious,” Giles replied as he took off his glasses.
*~*
Buffy fumed through the rest of her classes, ignoring the attempts at conversation that her friends were trying to lure her into. All she could think about was her death, dying again if the anointed one could bring the Master back.
When the last bell rang she practically ran to the library, anxious to see what Giles found out, Xander and Willow hot on her heels.
“Alright, alright, I-I-I’ve got something. It’s Latin, so bear with me. Uh, to revive the vampire they need his bones, uh… w-which they have, and, um, the blood…this is very unclear, of the closest person…uh, someone connected to the vampire,” Giles told her.
“That’d be me,” Buffy replied.
“Perhaps,” Giles agreed.
“We were close. We killed each other. It really promotes togetherness.”
“Well, is there anything on when the ceremony might take…” Xander trailed off as a rock came crashing through the window, raining glass on the library floor.
“Whoa!” Xander exclaimed.
Buffy grabbed the rock and noticed a note wrapped around it. She looked at Giles as she unwrapped the paper.
‘Come to the Bronze tonight,’ it read.
Xander read the lettering over her shoulder and glanced at Giles.
“I say we stock up and head on over,” he said gesturing the abundance of killing devices Giles had in his stash.
“Oh no. I don’t think so. I’m going alone,” Buffy glared at Xander.
“Excuse me? Do you want to die? Cuz last thing I heard was you were all for the breathing and living.”
“Xander, where the hell did you even learn how to talk? And yes, I want to live, which is why I am going alone. I can’t have you guys with me anymore; it takes away from my slaying. I can’t concentrate if I am worried about you two,” she said facing Willow.
“Buffy…” Willow started as Buffy made her way to the door.
“No Willow,” Buffy replied without turning around, leaving the redhead staring at the door as it bounced back.
*~*
Buffy’s hand was sweating as she gripped her favorite stake in her jacket pocket. She wasn’t nervous, or so she kept telling herself. But honestly, she was; she was nervous and she was angry. Angry to be put in this situation. To be faced with the feelings of her death yet again.
“Buffy?”
“Oh wonderful! As if my night could get any worse,” she exasperated as she spun around to face Angel.
“Not exactly the welcome I was hoping for,” he said dryly.
“Oh I’m sorry. Didn’t know I had to be a mind reader. What do you want, Angel?”
“The Master’s bones are missing.”
“No shit, Sherlock. Anything else that’s glaringly obvious that you feel the need to repeat?”
“Jesus, Buffy, I came to help. To see if I can do anything,” Angel answered wryly.
“I’ll tell you what you can do. You can turn around that large forehead of yours and walk away. I’m a big girl, Angel. I can handle this.”
“Buf…”
“What? What can you possibly do to help me? You can’t breathe the life back into me if I drown again can you?” she threw at him.
“No…no I can’t. But I can help you fight the minions,” he said dejectedly, his shoulders slumping.
“Again with the big girlness here. I am the slayer, Angel, THE slayer. I am much stronger than I look. I can take care of myself.”
“But…”
“Angel, do you not get the picture. Leave me alone!” she yelled as she stormed off, leaving Angel with his mouth hanging open in shock.
Angel stared at her retreating back wondering what the hell he had done to provoke such an attitude from Buffy. It was as if she truly hated him and he had no idea why.
*~*
Buffy was still fuming as she neared the Bronze.
“Stupid hair for a damn vampire anyways,” she cursed as she twirled her stake in her hands.
“Don’t forget to add huge forehead to the list,” a voice said from behind her.
Buffy spun around and her mouth fell open.
It’s him, oh my God, it’s him, she thought as she tried to collect her chin from the concrete.
He stood leaning against the lamppost, a brightly lit cigarette dangling from his full lips. He took a drag, his impossibly blue eyes meeting hers.
Buffy found talking a bit difficult, as would any sane woman in the presence of this archangel, this God of man who screamed sex without even opening his mouth.
Spike stared back at her, amused that she seemed to have trouble around him.
“Aren’t you going to ask?”
“Ask what?” Buffy questioned as she finally found her voice, her face breaking into a deep blush.
“What I’m doing here, in Sunnydale.”
“What are you doing here in Sunnydale?” she parroted, feeling almost stupid for not asking ahead of time.
“I have family here,” he replied simply as he threw the cigarette to the ground and stomped it into oblivion with his large black boot.
“Family?”
“That large forehead I mentioned before?”
“Angel?”
“That would be him.”
“Yikes! How could such a hot guy like you be…I mean, how are you related?” her blush deepening some more.
He opened his mouth to tell her when they heard a loud scream from inside the club.
Buffy spun around and started for the door without even realizing what she was doing, the blond man hot on her heels.
She broke down the door with a roundhouse kick and staggered into the dark, dank club.
A lone girl sat in the middle of the stage, a hood over her head. Buffy neared her carefully, her hand poised to touch the girl’s shoulder when she suddenly stood up. The hood fell back, revealing the girl’s vampire guise.
“Master Spike?” the girl asked the blond man behind Buffy.
“Spike?” Buffy repeated.
“You brought Buffy, the slayer.”
“The slayer?” Spike repeated.
“Take her to the warehouse. That’s where they are going to resurrect the Master. Her friends are already there,” the brown haired girl relayed, clearly excited that Spike was there.
Before Spike could say anything, Buffy was on the vampire. Her stake imbedded in her chest, the demon’s body exploding into a cloud of dust.
Buffy turned around, her stake held tightly in her hand.
“Master Spike?” she asked again, her green eyes questioning him.
“That’s my name, yeah.”
“Just how are you and Angel related?”
“He’s my bleedin’ sire,” Spike sneered.
“Oh, isn’t this just fucking fantastic,” Buffy exclaimed, her eyes not leaving his.
“Yeah, and you being the slayer doesn’t confuse things does it?” he asked her.
“I don’t have time for this. I need to get to the warehouse,” She said starting for the door.
“I’ll help.”
Buffy spun around and faced him.
“What?”
“I said I’d help you.”
“Why would you want to do that? Isn’t the Master like the head of your line? Why would you want to watch me destroy any chances of him coming back to life?”
“Because he was a pasty old bugger who annoyed me to bloody pieces,” Spike smirked.
Buffy knew she shouldn’t…actually she didn’t know what to think. Her slayer side was saying don’t trust the vampire, but her human side was relenting, sending pictures of them kissing to her brain.
“Fine…let’s go. But one thing… you turn on me, I will stake you,” she threatened, her eyes darkening perceptibly.
If she hadn’t looked so damned cute doing that, Spike would have felt very vulnerable. Instead…
“Right,” Spike laughed as he followed her out of the Bronze.
*~*
Inside the warehouse nestled in the center of the room were the Master’s bones, laid out, looking like a medical examiner was about to do a report.
Buffy and Spike snuck into the warehouse courtesy of a side door and stood watching as Collin brought a black case to Absalom. Absalom pulled on a cord and Willow, Jenny, Giles and Cordelia appeared, hanging upside down and unconscious above the Master’s bones.
“Behold, these four mortals,” he said.
Behind Buffy, Xander grabbed her arm and looked towards Spike.
“I tried to find you,” Xander whispered as he snuck another glance at the male beside her. “Who’s he?”
“Help,” Buffy answered, her eyes not leaving the tableau in front of her.
“Witnesses to our Master’s wretched demise. They will breathe their last this night. The blood that pours from their throats will bring NEW LIFE to the old one. We gather for his resurrection. For the dawn of a new hell,” Absalom states.
“Buffy?” Xander whispered. “We have to do something now!”
“You two get the others out of here,” she said to Xander and Spike.
“We need to distract the vampires,” Spike replied, gesturing to the group standing around the Master’s bones.
“Right.”
“What are you going to do?” Xander asked.
“I’m going to kill them all. That ought to distract them.”
Xander and Spike leave her as she turned back to Absalom who was
holding a long curved knife.
“For the old one. For his pain. For the dark.”
“For the dark!” the vampires chorused.
Absalom kissed the blade and smiled at the other vampires. A stake suddenly protruded from one of the vampire’s chest, and he stared wide-eyed with shock, right before his dust fell gently to the ground. Absalom glared at Buffy and roared. She smirked at him and began fighting the three vampires that suddenly surrounded her. Buffy stakes each one right after the other.
Spike and Xander climbed the ladder to the platform above and pulled on the chains to reel the humans to safety.
Worried about the safety of the child next to him, Absalom grabbed the Anointed One and dragged him out of the warehouse, sending him off with one of the other minions. Secure in the knowledge that the child would be seen to, he reentered the warehouse, only to see Spike and the human boy releasing the human sacrifices.
“The sacrifices! Stop them!” he shouted to the remaining vampires.
A vampire charged onto the platform and grabbed Spike. Xander’s fingers practically flew over the chains, dragging his friends towards the platform, while Spike diverts the vampire’s attention. Below them, Buffy was in her element, fighting and killing, dusting each and every vampire that came into her line of sight. Before she realized it, the last vampire was dust, forgetting for a moment the vamp she sent smashing into the boxes. She looked around, stake held ready… just in case. At the sound of fighting, Buffy glanced towards the rafters and witnessed Spike staking his last one.
Spike coughed at the dust that had settled over him. Feeling the Slayer’s gaze, he looked over the railing and smirked.
Absalom stepped out of the shadows to stand in front of Buffy, holding a large sledgehammer.
“ENOUGH!” he shouted.
Buffy looked away from Spike to roll her eyes at the vampire, not realizing that there was another vampire crawling out of the boxes.
“Your day is done, girl. I’ll grind you into a sticky paste and hear you beg before I smash your face. “
“So are you gonna kill me or are we just making small talk?” she taunted.
Absalom raised the sledgehammer over his head and screamed as he charged. The other vampire took the opportunity to come at her from the other side. Buffy spied the wooden torch in front of her and reached for it without even thinking, easily breaking it in half. With the two pieces held in her hands, Buffy began turning them. The two vampires, so set in their intent to kill, didn’t even realize it… until it was too late. They crashed into either end of the torch and while the vampire behind her exploded into dust, Absalom began to scream as he was set aflame.
He made a move to grab Buffy but it was too late, the flames quickly engulfed his body and he exploded, and the sledgehammer fell to the floor with a loud clank that echoed around the nearly deserted warehouse.
Buffy smiled, please slightly and drops the torch from her hands. She turns to the master’s skeleton and stares. Spike approaches her from behind, his hand reaching out to touch her shoulder as she bends down and grabs the sledgehammer.
Spike can’t help but watch as she walked slowly to the skeleton and stared down at it. He can feel what she is feeling and her raw emotion is wreaking havoc in her body as she raised the sledgehammer above her head and began smashing the bones into tiny fragments.
She broke every single bone, and continued to hack away until the pieces turned to dust. Weary beyond belief, she dropped the sledgehammer and promptly burst into tears.
Spike was beside her in an instant, ready when she turned and threw herself into his arms.
Her tears fell in earnest and she sobbed brokenly against his chest. Spike held her close, murmuring soft words as he caressed her hair, wanting nothing more than to take the pain away.
*~*
“You didn’t have to walk me home,” Buffy told him as they neared the steps of her porch.
Spike smiled at her and lightly squeezed her hand.
“Well you never know what kind of big bads are lurking out there,” he said.
“Spike…”
“It’s ok…I know.”
“How do you even know what I was going to say?” she asked him, amused.
“Cuz’ I’m just THAT good,” he replied, earning a nice eye roll from Buffy.
“Seriously…thank you. Without you…I just…thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
Buffy looked up and stared into his blue eyes. Within the cerulean depths, there lurked an indefinable emotion. Buffy blinked at him and touched his face, marveling at the softness of his skin before lifting herself on her toes and pressing her mouth against his.
It was a gentle kiss, a delicate touch of her lips, a hint of what was to come.
She broke away and stared at him, her eyes mirroring the emotion in his.
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there’s just one left
‘Cause you know
You know, you know…
Spike’s hands found their way to either side of her face as he dragged her mouth back to his. Buffy felt her knees weaken when his lips touched hers again. Her senses reeled, as if she had been short circuited; her body was pulled against his as he deepened their kiss, his tongue running in a lazy circle around the seal of her lips.
That I love you
I have loved you all long
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you’ll be with me
And you’ll never go
Stop breathing if
I don’t see you anymore…
His hands pulled her closer, his palms rubbing into her back as his mouth moved possessively over hers. Blood began to pound in her veins, leaping from her heart and making her knees tremble with desire.
One my knees, I’ll ask
Last chance for one last dance
‘Cause with you, I’d withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I’d give it all
I’d give for us
Give anything but I won’t give up
Spike kissed his way from her cheek down to her neck, placing a small kiss against the throbbing hollow of her throat.
“I’ve wanted this for so long,” he whispered against her skin, his lips brushing against her neck, sending a shock of goose bumps to dot her flesh.
“I’ve thought of nothing else. You haunt me,” she replied tangling her hands in his shock of white blond hair.
“My dreams, my waking hours. You’re everywhere I turn.”
I wanted
I wanted you to stay
‘Cause I needed
I need to hear you say…
Buffy felt the heady sensation of his mouth against her collarbone and she melted inside. To finally be in his arms, to find the peace that she had been waiting for.
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
‘Cause I’m not leaving you anymore
Believe and hold on to me
And never let me go…
We Belong Together
By: Jerzeyanjel
Episode: When she was bad
Summary: What if Spike came to LA while Buffy was visiting her father?
Rating: R
Disclaimer: As always I own nothing…only the fantasies of Spike I create in my brain but even then I don’t own him. :: damn ::
Author's Note: Thanks ever so to
spikeskat for her beta abilities. Without her eyes my ficage would be nothing. And also to
spikeshunny for the delicious banner and icon to accompany this fic. Thank you ladies you both spoil me soo rotten!! :: huge hugs :: Lyrics are Far Away by Nickelback.
We Belong Together
The same pasty, wrinkled face complete with long sharp fangs haunted her dreams all summer long. Every time her eyelids would close, eyes of blood red would stare back at her. She hadn’t slept a whole night through since her “death.” Since the night she punched Giles in the jaw and knocked him out cold. Since the night she put on the white prom dress and gazed at herself in the mirror. The night the Master bested her, his fangs slicing into the tender flesh of her throat and drawing out her essence. Throwing her lifeless body into a shallow puddle of clear water and leaving her for dead.
“When a slayer dies, another is called.”
Not so important to be the chosen one was it?
These special girls can be replaced immediately like nothing at all. Almost as if they’re robots doing the dirty work for the Watcher’s Council, and in reality they were.
When Buffy’s eyes had opened, it was Xander’s face staring worriedly back at her. It was his hands that held her to him, and it was Angel who sat beside him, unable to do anything at all. Angel equals vampire, vampire equals death, death equals the ability NOT to breathe. How could Angel have saved her? Instead he was pushed aside by the mortal man, his breath alone the saver of her life.
She did defeat the Master that night, dusting his flesh and whitening his bones. Forever changing how she would view vampires, and herself.
Her whole summer thereafter was spent at her father’s house in LA. Shopping and spending money, keeping herself closed off, not relaying what she was feeling, what she was thinking. What her father thought, Buffy had no idea, and oddly, she found herself not caring either way. When he would go to bed at night she would wander the streets, looking for something, anything, to beat on, to take away the rage flowing through her veins.
Not one demon, vampire, monster in any shape came across her path. It seemed as if the demon world had gone into hiding, as if they knew Buffy the vampire slayer, killer of the Master, head of the line of Aurelius, was in town. She laughed bitterly thinking of the demons shaking in fear within their homes.
Buffy’s anger burned so brightly she damn near glowed in the dark. Her thoughts consuming her, busying her mind with what ifs and whys. So intent with her concentration she ran unawares into a wall of black leather. Hands grasped at her shoulders as she pulled back, her eyes meeting those of a violent blue.
Spike stared back at the girl, sensing the anger and sadness within her. An odd feeling came over him and instead of his usual vampire see, vampire want, vampire kill motto; his dead heart softened and he silently cursed his inner William.
Little did Buffy know, she had run into another vampire of the Aurelius line. The next deadliest vampire next to Angel. But as they stared at one another, all Buffy wanted to do was burst into tears. To finally release the anger, and every other emotion, she was feeling.
Release…that’s what she craved, what she needed.
Her green eyes welled with the uncontrolled turmoil reeling inside her and a broken sob escaped her closed lips.
Spike blinked at her. Never in his life had he come across a woman who would burst into tears right in front of him, a woman he didn’t even know. He found his hands pulling her in, wrapping tightly around her as she sobbed into his leather duster and soaked the red silk shirt underneath. Her tears fiery hot on his skin, leaving her mark on him that would change their destinies.
They stood that way, his strong arms around her as she clutched at his jacket, her knuckles white with the severity of her emotions, for what seemed like an eternity. The moon rose higher in the sky before she finally lifted her head from his chest. She peered up at him; her green eyes bright, her face glistening with her spent tears. Spike was helpless, kicking himself even as he bent his head, his mouth softly meeting hers.
Buffy let out a muffled sound as the softest of lips descended delicately against hers. He pressed his lips to hers, caressing her mouth more than kissing it. He broke away with a gasp of breath, a shiver of want running through his body.
Buffy was shocked at her own response to his kiss, her body aflame with desire from the tenderness of his touch. She lifted herself onto her tiptoes and pressed her mouth more firmly against his.
Spike growled low in his throat as her small arms wound around his neck, pulling the soft hair at the nape of his neck, drawing his kiss deeper. He ran his tongue along the seal of her mouth, demanding entrance.
Buffy granted him that and sighed against him and thrilled as he gripped her to him almost painfully, desperately.
There were no words needed between them, the kisses exchanged were more than enough.
~*~
Buffy hated being back home in Sunnydale. It was nothing but a toxic mess of bad memories. Everywhere she turned she saw the Master, coming at her, staring at her, mocking her. Willow and Xander tried to be helpful but all they were doing was annoying her. She had even resorted to spiteful comments at both their expenses and still they were there like two overfed puppy dogs.
It was annoying.
Angel was just as bad, following her to the point of stalking. Showing up at her bedroom window, his brooding presence making her even angrier than she already was. Last night he had come to her window and watched her. When she felt the creepy crawlies, she’d known it was him but caressed the stake hidden beneath her mattress anyway, wanting nothing more than to bury it in his chest.
Buffy just wished he would get the hint and leave her alone.
That everyone would just leave her alone.
Giles had suggested they get back into their training schedule and Buffy jumped at it. Wanting nothing more than to beat the shit out of something, longing for more release from her turbulent emotions.
Release.
She hadn’t seen the blond man since that night in L.A. His kisses were forever burnt in her memory, and she hadn’t been able to stop thinking about him since he’d left her alone on her father’s front porch in the glimmering twilight. She had never felt that way before. Within the circle of his arms she’d found an unlikely sanctuary, and she had needed it; she had needed his comfort and his kisses. His caress was something she knew she would never stop craving.
Her dreams weren’t so full of the Master anymore, they weren’t nightmarish hells. They were full of him. The blond man who took care of her and comforted her in a way that she would never forget. He haunted her dreams now, her mind, her fantasies.
She still had an occassional nightmare, but most of the time they ended with her being saved by the blond man and not dying at the hands of the Master. Even in her dreams he radiated strength, defying the Master and killing him in one fell swoop, imbedding her favorite stake deep in the ancient vampire’s heart and then decapitating him.
This time when she woke up in a tangle of sheets and sweaty limbs, Buffy wasn’t fighting for her life; it wasn’t hell that she was escaping. It was the sweet dream of him, kissing her, caressing her form and making love to her. Creating immense amounts of pleasure, pleasure like waves within her body causing her to sail over the edge, leaving her trembling with desire.
Her body on fire with need for…him.
~*~
As soon as he passed over the Sunnydale city limits, he felt it. Felt his sire, the great poof, the giant forehead. Spike snickered, wondering why Angelus would want to hang out in this sad little town. Sure it was the hellmouth but Angel’s fun vampire days were over with his soul so why stay here? Why hang out in place that you couldn’t have fun in?
What better place can one brood?
The hellmouth sang through Spike’s veins. Sure it had been fun in LA, meeting up with his old demon friends and playing poker, Drusilla getting all crazy being back in California. But they had been so boring, they were all terrified inside their homes. Only Spike ventured out in the dark night to explore, the others staying home, scared the slayer would get to them. Word was out that she was nuts, that she had almost died at the hands of the Master, none knowing the real truth. Spike laughed ruefully as the rumors were told to him.
The slayer scaring hundreds of demons into their respective hidey-holes?
It was almost too much for Spike to believe.
So Spike had looked into it, wanting to see this slayer for himself. He’d roamed all around the huge town looking for the girl for weeks, never once seeing her. Drusilla would often ask why he went out so much, and never killed anything. Spike would have no answer and said simply, just wanted to check out this bloody town.
Spike was bored being in LA and was just about to leave the night the blond girl crashed into him. She looked so sad, so drained, and Spike felt horrible for her. Completely unknowing in why she was in such a state. All he wanted to do was wrap his arms around her and comfort her. It was a feeling Spike, William the Bloody, had never experienced, not even for his dark princess, Drusilla. So he gave in, sliding his arms around her and letting her sob against him.
When he returned back to his lair that morning Drusilla had been pissed, the fairies in her head telling her he had been with another woman. Dru ranted and raved, jealousy flowing through her like a river.
My William! She had screamed before packing up Miss Edith and telling him she couldn’t be with him anymore.
Spike was so shocked, he just laughed. Laughed good and hard until his sides hurt and tears streamed down his face. This enraged Dru more and she left, slamming the heavy door behind her. Spike knew he should be sad but he couldn’t bring himself to feel the sorrow he was supposed to have.
*~*
Willow and Xander had told Buffy where they had buried the Master’s bones, which wasn’t exactly the highest point of their intelligence. Every night during patrol Buffy would walk to the cemetery and stare at the tree he was buried beneath. Sometimes she would talk; sometimes she would just stand there and stare at the wooden cross, anger coursing through her veins. Kicking herself for allowing her death, for allowing this monster to overpower her.
Giles had assured her that his bones couldn’t be touched, that they had taken great measures in making sure the anointed one and his minions wouldn’t be able to get them. But on that particular night, as Buffy passed by the tree, she noticed the dirt disturbed and the bones gone. A flash of fear struck her and she began to shake with rage. Angry, not at the vampire, but at Giles and her friends for allowing this to happen.
The next morning at school, she saw Giles talking to Willow and Xander, and Buffy had to swallow the angry retorts she was dying to throw at them. Plastering a fake smile on her face, she approached them.
“Trout? Trout! Yes, trout is a fish. Good Morning. Did you sleep well?” Giles asked turning to Buffy.
“Like a rock. The Master is gone,” she answered dryly.
“I’m sorry?”
“The Master. I went to by his grave last night, and they have a vacancy.”
“Good God!” Giles exclaimed.
“What would somebody want with the Master’s bones?” Willow asked.
“A trophy, a horrible conversation piece?” Xander guessed.
“They’re going to bring him back. They’re gonna bring the Master back to live, and I seem to recall you telling me he was history.”
“Buffy, I-I-I’ve never heard of a-a revivification ritual being successful,” Giles stammered.
“But you’ve heard of them? Thanks for the warning,” Buffy said angrily.
“Well, Buffy, Giles did bury him and…” Willow started.
“Look, this is slayer stuff, okay? Could we have just a little less from the civilians, please?”
“Okay, that’s just about enough!” Xander huffed, jumping to Willow’s defense.
Buffy shot Xander a look that could have eviscerated his skin.
Willow’s gaze wavered between the two, angry that Buffy was being mean and happy because Xander stuck up for her.
“Buffy…” she started.
“You know what? No. I just said it was slayer stuff. Why can’t you guys just deal with that? I’m done with this,” Buffy said turning and walking away, leaving the three to stare after her, their mouths open in shock.
“She’s taking this harder than we thought,” Xander commented.
“You think so? I thought that was quite obvious,” Giles replied as he took off his glasses.
*~*
Buffy fumed through the rest of her classes, ignoring the attempts at conversation that her friends were trying to lure her into. All she could think about was her death, dying again if the anointed one could bring the Master back.
When the last bell rang she practically ran to the library, anxious to see what Giles found out, Xander and Willow hot on her heels.
“Alright, alright, I-I-I’ve got something. It’s Latin, so bear with me. Uh, to revive the vampire they need his bones, uh… w-which they have, and, um, the blood…this is very unclear, of the closest person…uh, someone connected to the vampire,” Giles told her.
“That’d be me,” Buffy replied.
“Perhaps,” Giles agreed.
“We were close. We killed each other. It really promotes togetherness.”
“Well, is there anything on when the ceremony might take…” Xander trailed off as a rock came crashing through the window, raining glass on the library floor.
“Whoa!” Xander exclaimed.
Buffy grabbed the rock and noticed a note wrapped around it. She looked at Giles as she unwrapped the paper.
‘Come to the Bronze tonight,’ it read.
Xander read the lettering over her shoulder and glanced at Giles.
“I say we stock up and head on over,” he said gesturing the abundance of killing devices Giles had in his stash.
“Oh no. I don’t think so. I’m going alone,” Buffy glared at Xander.
“Excuse me? Do you want to die? Cuz last thing I heard was you were all for the breathing and living.”
“Xander, where the hell did you even learn how to talk? And yes, I want to live, which is why I am going alone. I can’t have you guys with me anymore; it takes away from my slaying. I can’t concentrate if I am worried about you two,” she said facing Willow.
“Buffy…” Willow started as Buffy made her way to the door.
“No Willow,” Buffy replied without turning around, leaving the redhead staring at the door as it bounced back.
*~*
Buffy’s hand was sweating as she gripped her favorite stake in her jacket pocket. She wasn’t nervous, or so she kept telling herself. But honestly, she was; she was nervous and she was angry. Angry to be put in this situation. To be faced with the feelings of her death yet again.
“Buffy?”
“Oh wonderful! As if my night could get any worse,” she exasperated as she spun around to face Angel.
“Not exactly the welcome I was hoping for,” he said dryly.
“Oh I’m sorry. Didn’t know I had to be a mind reader. What do you want, Angel?”
“The Master’s bones are missing.”
“No shit, Sherlock. Anything else that’s glaringly obvious that you feel the need to repeat?”
“Jesus, Buffy, I came to help. To see if I can do anything,” Angel answered wryly.
“I’ll tell you what you can do. You can turn around that large forehead of yours and walk away. I’m a big girl, Angel. I can handle this.”
“Buf…”
“What? What can you possibly do to help me? You can’t breathe the life back into me if I drown again can you?” she threw at him.
“No…no I can’t. But I can help you fight the minions,” he said dejectedly, his shoulders slumping.
“Again with the big girlness here. I am the slayer, Angel, THE slayer. I am much stronger than I look. I can take care of myself.”
“But…”
“Angel, do you not get the picture. Leave me alone!” she yelled as she stormed off, leaving Angel with his mouth hanging open in shock.
Angel stared at her retreating back wondering what the hell he had done to provoke such an attitude from Buffy. It was as if she truly hated him and he had no idea why.
*~*
Buffy was still fuming as she neared the Bronze.
“Stupid hair for a damn vampire anyways,” she cursed as she twirled her stake in her hands.
“Don’t forget to add huge forehead to the list,” a voice said from behind her.
Buffy spun around and her mouth fell open.
It’s him, oh my God, it’s him, she thought as she tried to collect her chin from the concrete.
He stood leaning against the lamppost, a brightly lit cigarette dangling from his full lips. He took a drag, his impossibly blue eyes meeting hers.
Buffy found talking a bit difficult, as would any sane woman in the presence of this archangel, this God of man who screamed sex without even opening his mouth.
Spike stared back at her, amused that she seemed to have trouble around him.
“Aren’t you going to ask?”
“Ask what?” Buffy questioned as she finally found her voice, her face breaking into a deep blush.
“What I’m doing here, in Sunnydale.”
“What are you doing here in Sunnydale?” she parroted, feeling almost stupid for not asking ahead of time.
“I have family here,” he replied simply as he threw the cigarette to the ground and stomped it into oblivion with his large black boot.
“Family?”
“That large forehead I mentioned before?”
“Angel?”
“That would be him.”
“Yikes! How could such a hot guy like you be…I mean, how are you related?” her blush deepening some more.
He opened his mouth to tell her when they heard a loud scream from inside the club.
Buffy spun around and started for the door without even realizing what she was doing, the blond man hot on her heels.
She broke down the door with a roundhouse kick and staggered into the dark, dank club.
A lone girl sat in the middle of the stage, a hood over her head. Buffy neared her carefully, her hand poised to touch the girl’s shoulder when she suddenly stood up. The hood fell back, revealing the girl’s vampire guise.
“Master Spike?” the girl asked the blond man behind Buffy.
“Spike?” Buffy repeated.
“You brought Buffy, the slayer.”
“The slayer?” Spike repeated.
“Take her to the warehouse. That’s where they are going to resurrect the Master. Her friends are already there,” the brown haired girl relayed, clearly excited that Spike was there.
Before Spike could say anything, Buffy was on the vampire. Her stake imbedded in her chest, the demon’s body exploding into a cloud of dust.
Buffy turned around, her stake held tightly in her hand.
“Master Spike?” she asked again, her green eyes questioning him.
“That’s my name, yeah.”
“Just how are you and Angel related?”
“He’s my bleedin’ sire,” Spike sneered.
“Oh, isn’t this just fucking fantastic,” Buffy exclaimed, her eyes not leaving his.
“Yeah, and you being the slayer doesn’t confuse things does it?” he asked her.
“I don’t have time for this. I need to get to the warehouse,” She said starting for the door.
“I’ll help.”
Buffy spun around and faced him.
“What?”
“I said I’d help you.”
“Why would you want to do that? Isn’t the Master like the head of your line? Why would you want to watch me destroy any chances of him coming back to life?”
“Because he was a pasty old bugger who annoyed me to bloody pieces,” Spike smirked.
Buffy knew she shouldn’t…actually she didn’t know what to think. Her slayer side was saying don’t trust the vampire, but her human side was relenting, sending pictures of them kissing to her brain.
“Fine…let’s go. But one thing… you turn on me, I will stake you,” she threatened, her eyes darkening perceptibly.
If she hadn’t looked so damned cute doing that, Spike would have felt very vulnerable. Instead…
“Right,” Spike laughed as he followed her out of the Bronze.
*~*
Inside the warehouse nestled in the center of the room were the Master’s bones, laid out, looking like a medical examiner was about to do a report.
Buffy and Spike snuck into the warehouse courtesy of a side door and stood watching as Collin brought a black case to Absalom. Absalom pulled on a cord and Willow, Jenny, Giles and Cordelia appeared, hanging upside down and unconscious above the Master’s bones.
“Behold, these four mortals,” he said.
Behind Buffy, Xander grabbed her arm and looked towards Spike.
“I tried to find you,” Xander whispered as he snuck another glance at the male beside her. “Who’s he?”
“Help,” Buffy answered, her eyes not leaving the tableau in front of her.
“Witnesses to our Master’s wretched demise. They will breathe their last this night. The blood that pours from their throats will bring NEW LIFE to the old one. We gather for his resurrection. For the dawn of a new hell,” Absalom states.
“Buffy?” Xander whispered. “We have to do something now!”
“You two get the others out of here,” she said to Xander and Spike.
“We need to distract the vampires,” Spike replied, gesturing to the group standing around the Master’s bones.
“Right.”
“What are you going to do?” Xander asked.
“I’m going to kill them all. That ought to distract them.”
Xander and Spike leave her as she turned back to Absalom who was
holding a long curved knife.
“For the old one. For his pain. For the dark.”
“For the dark!” the vampires chorused.
Absalom kissed the blade and smiled at the other vampires. A stake suddenly protruded from one of the vampire’s chest, and he stared wide-eyed with shock, right before his dust fell gently to the ground. Absalom glared at Buffy and roared. She smirked at him and began fighting the three vampires that suddenly surrounded her. Buffy stakes each one right after the other.
Spike and Xander climbed the ladder to the platform above and pulled on the chains to reel the humans to safety.
Worried about the safety of the child next to him, Absalom grabbed the Anointed One and dragged him out of the warehouse, sending him off with one of the other minions. Secure in the knowledge that the child would be seen to, he reentered the warehouse, only to see Spike and the human boy releasing the human sacrifices.
“The sacrifices! Stop them!” he shouted to the remaining vampires.
A vampire charged onto the platform and grabbed Spike. Xander’s fingers practically flew over the chains, dragging his friends towards the platform, while Spike diverts the vampire’s attention. Below them, Buffy was in her element, fighting and killing, dusting each and every vampire that came into her line of sight. Before she realized it, the last vampire was dust, forgetting for a moment the vamp she sent smashing into the boxes. She looked around, stake held ready… just in case. At the sound of fighting, Buffy glanced towards the rafters and witnessed Spike staking his last one.
Spike coughed at the dust that had settled over him. Feeling the Slayer’s gaze, he looked over the railing and smirked.
Absalom stepped out of the shadows to stand in front of Buffy, holding a large sledgehammer.
“ENOUGH!” he shouted.
Buffy looked away from Spike to roll her eyes at the vampire, not realizing that there was another vampire crawling out of the boxes.
“Your day is done, girl. I’ll grind you into a sticky paste and hear you beg before I smash your face. “
“So are you gonna kill me or are we just making small talk?” she taunted.
Absalom raised the sledgehammer over his head and screamed as he charged. The other vampire took the opportunity to come at her from the other side. Buffy spied the wooden torch in front of her and reached for it without even thinking, easily breaking it in half. With the two pieces held in her hands, Buffy began turning them. The two vampires, so set in their intent to kill, didn’t even realize it… until it was too late. They crashed into either end of the torch and while the vampire behind her exploded into dust, Absalom began to scream as he was set aflame.
He made a move to grab Buffy but it was too late, the flames quickly engulfed his body and he exploded, and the sledgehammer fell to the floor with a loud clank that echoed around the nearly deserted warehouse.
Buffy smiled, please slightly and drops the torch from her hands. She turns to the master’s skeleton and stares. Spike approaches her from behind, his hand reaching out to touch her shoulder as she bends down and grabs the sledgehammer.
Spike can’t help but watch as she walked slowly to the skeleton and stared down at it. He can feel what she is feeling and her raw emotion is wreaking havoc in her body as she raised the sledgehammer above her head and began smashing the bones into tiny fragments.
She broke every single bone, and continued to hack away until the pieces turned to dust. Weary beyond belief, she dropped the sledgehammer and promptly burst into tears.
Spike was beside her in an instant, ready when she turned and threw herself into his arms.
Her tears fell in earnest and she sobbed brokenly against his chest. Spike held her close, murmuring soft words as he caressed her hair, wanting nothing more than to take the pain away.
*~*
“You didn’t have to walk me home,” Buffy told him as they neared the steps of her porch.
Spike smiled at her and lightly squeezed her hand.
“Well you never know what kind of big bads are lurking out there,” he said.
“Spike…”
“It’s ok…I know.”
“How do you even know what I was going to say?” she asked him, amused.
“Cuz’ I’m just THAT good,” he replied, earning a nice eye roll from Buffy.
“Seriously…thank you. Without you…I just…thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
Buffy looked up and stared into his blue eyes. Within the cerulean depths, there lurked an indefinable emotion. Buffy blinked at him and touched his face, marveling at the softness of his skin before lifting herself on her toes and pressing her mouth against his.
It was a gentle kiss, a delicate touch of her lips, a hint of what was to come.
She broke away and stared at him, her eyes mirroring the emotion in his.
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there’s just one left
‘Cause you know
You know, you know…
Spike’s hands found their way to either side of her face as he dragged her mouth back to his. Buffy felt her knees weaken when his lips touched hers again. Her senses reeled, as if she had been short circuited; her body was pulled against his as he deepened their kiss, his tongue running in a lazy circle around the seal of her lips.
That I love you
I have loved you all long
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you’ll be with me
And you’ll never go
Stop breathing if
I don’t see you anymore…
His hands pulled her closer, his palms rubbing into her back as his mouth moved possessively over hers. Blood began to pound in her veins, leaping from her heart and making her knees tremble with desire.
One my knees, I’ll ask
Last chance for one last dance
‘Cause with you, I’d withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I’d give it all
I’d give for us
Give anything but I won’t give up
Spike kissed his way from her cheek down to her neck, placing a small kiss against the throbbing hollow of her throat.
“I’ve wanted this for so long,” he whispered against her skin, his lips brushing against her neck, sending a shock of goose bumps to dot her flesh.
“I’ve thought of nothing else. You haunt me,” she replied tangling her hands in his shock of white blond hair.
“My dreams, my waking hours. You’re everywhere I turn.”
I wanted
I wanted you to stay
‘Cause I needed
I need to hear you say…
Buffy felt the heady sensation of his mouth against her collarbone and she melted inside. To finally be in his arms, to find the peace that she had been waiting for.
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
‘Cause I’m not leaving you anymore
Believe and hold on to me
And never let me go…