Retribution | Alexander

[twhitesakura]

Title: Retribution
Author: Whitesakura
Rating: PG
Pairing: Hephaistion/Alexander, Alexander/Bagoas
Disclaimer: I don't own any of them.
Summary: Hephaistion thinks there is such a thing as divine judgment.

Comments

[trust_n0_1]

I started writing this comment 3 times already and still I cannot find words fitting enough to do it justice. There is so much delicacy and feeling in it. The red leaves under which the kitten is buried and the crimson leaves in the end, so well fitting with the theme. Greece (Macedon) vs Persia and everything that has changed between them. And the wine cup, I can't forget the wine cup. My spine is still tingling. Truly, dear, you should write more in this fandom. You have so much to offer. I hope you'll put it up at atgstories?? This goes straight to my memories, if it's ok with you.

[twhitesakura]

Thank you for your kind words. RL is throwing a lot of things at me right now. I don't write well when I'm very stressed and unhappy, but I'll definitely try to revisit this fandom when things calm down. And you think I should post? Done.

And I'm flattered you want to put this in your memories. ^_^

[shezan]

In Persia, Alexander never tells you to leave, but he never asks you to stay.

Oh, this is so elegant, so wistful, so unusual, in the midst of so many schoogirl fics! Absolutely lovely and elegiac. Pleasepleaseplease come post it at maryrenaultfics!

[twhitesakura]

*Looks up definition for "elegiac"* Oh...so that's what it means. Xp

I'm flattered you think I'm a good writer. You should try trust_n0_1 and florachan for good Alexander/Hephaistion fics.

I've only read two books by Renault (with an aborted attempt at "The Charioteer") but I'll go have a look around at the community.

Thanks!

[shezan]

Oh, give The Charioteer another chance! One you've passed Chapter 1 (the need for it only appears in time), you are gripped. And the hero... *swoons*

And yesyesyes, come post at maryrenaultfics, you'll see, it's a wonderful crowd, some of whom literally seem to channel Renault. (None of the high-school babblings you can find elsewhere.)

If you want Renault books in eBook format, ask away! I can email them to you. (Alas, not The Charioteer, which I have never found in electronic format.)

[lavender_rose]

I loved this story. The writing was so poetic and symbolic. I could truly feel how Hephaistion felt through your writing. Well done:)

[twhitesakura]

My writing was symbolic? I originally threw in the crimson tree because it was pretty. *Sly look*

Poor Hephaistion. Nothing but angst and sad resignation to emote in this fic. Thank you for your comments!

[rothalion]

well done. Succinct and beautiful. "...but he never asks you to stay." What a telling line. Its like a postcard of emotions. Im reminded of William Carlos ...well "The Red Wheel Barrow" poet. Thanks

[twhitesakura]

"A postcard of emotions." *Eyes glaze over* That's poetic and beautiful, too. On a lighter note, where is Hephaistion writing from? XD

Would you believe the line you mentioned was done without plan or tweaking? My favorite is actually about the misted window pane because I was actively trying to search for the right sensation in words.

[rothalion]

Thats how it should be. No real plan just writes itself. looking forward to more! Thanks!

[angstman]

wonderful story....

sad sad sad...

[twhitesakura]

Aww...thank you. *Sends tissues and imaginary conversation*

Hephaistion: *Staring at the tree*
Alexander: *Comes into the room, rolls eyes* Get away from there, you know you're allergic to pollen.
Hephaistion: ACHOO!
Alexander: *Pushes Hephaistion* Back to bed we go.
H & A: *Snuggle*

Oh god. I did not just write that. XD

[angstman]

Thanks, now you make me smile..