Stamped; Heart Shards Theme
Name: Manda (Amako/Serika/Shiirahime)
Age: 22
Gender: Female
What do you like most about yourself? Very few things, actually. But I suppose one would definitely be my determination. I can almost be stupid about it and be trying when I know I shouldn't be, but I refuse to believe that anything is hopeless. Aside from that, I also consider myself loyal and I'll stand by my family and friends until the bitter end. And I may not seem this way at first, but once I get to know someone well I grow to care about them a great deal. And this only holds true for in the recent year or so, but I've been able to stand up for myself and my opinions more often, without bending to another's will as I have in the past. I also like my creative side, as it's one of the few things I can take pride in.
What do you like least about yourself? ...Where to start? Well, first of all, although I am highly determined, I am very easily discouraged. I don't fully give up, but I will mope and my self-conscious issues will keep me from moving forward very quickly. I'm also a huge procrastinator (if you couldn't tell by my timing with this app), which seems to be something I can never do away with. XD; Aside from that, I'm lazy, which ties into the latter. And though I speak up for myself and my view more often, it leads me into arguments often. I also don't like how...worrisome I can be and how desperate I can seem for company at times. Even if someone flat out doesn't want to speak me or tells me to leave them alone, I persist if I feel like I'm being ignored and I can be highly annoying in that sense. Also, I consider myself boring and I always get the feeling that I'm not being interesting enough either in action or speech for anyone to really want much of anything to do with me. I also feel like I make a lot of bad choices and although I stick to my goals, it's hard for me to find a solid goal, thus I'm rather aimless a lot of the time.
How do you act in the company of other people? Depends, actually. If it's one other person and I know them decently well, I'm relatively open and even borderline cheerful, talkative and random. However, get me with two or more people, even if I do know one or both of them, and I'll be much quieter, less likely to speak up on anything, and generally just fading into the background. I'm intimidated by groups of people. One on one or sometimes if it's two that I know well, then I'll be alright with it, but anything else makes me feel like a third wheel or something because I can't adapt or fit in well.
Put an X (or whatever symbol you'd like) on all the options that apply to you.
Example: [X] Happy
Which of these words appeal to you? (Explain in brief beside each of the options you chose, if you feel the need to expound.)
[x] Contented
[ ] Distressed
[ ] Melancholy
[ ] Moving
[ ] Frustrated
[x] Loving
[ ] Scared
[x] Optimistic
[x] Kind
[x] Inquisitive
[ ] Self-important
[x] Confident
[x] Loyal
Using the same list from above, which feelings do you experience the most? (Explain in brief if you want.)
[ ] Contented
[x] Distressed
[x] Melancholy
[ ] Moving
[ ] Frustrated
[ ] Loving
[x] Scared
[ ] Optimistic
[x] Kind
[ ] Inquisitive
[ ] Self-important
[ ] Confident
[x] Loyal
In general, are you more...
Introverted/extroverted? Introverted, most of the time. I don't have any friends in real life and never really did through my school years or even after. It's basically turned me into a sort of turtle or hermit. I keep to myself a lot and I don't like opening myself to being judged, since I'm used to being abandoned by everyone I meet. And the goals that I do have or make, tend to usually be something I do on my own.
Bold/timid? Timid, I would say. I can be bold as of late when I want to stand up for something, but in general I'll be quiet and hesitant to speak up about something.
Warm/detached? I'll seem highly detached until I get to know someone and feel comfortable with them, then I warm up like a bloody fire that you'll have a hard time putting out. :P
Optimistic/pessimistic? Pessimistic, although I wish I could be more optimistic. I hold a small amount of optimism that gets me through everything, but I generally end up looking on the downside of things because situations in my life, particularly concerning people, never turn out well on my end. But I am optimistic when it comes to others. The irony of having so little self-confidence, is that it actually gives me confidence in others and I try my best to keep them looking up.
Emotionally strong/weak? It seems strange to say this, but I would have to go with both. I can be strong when it really counts and I have a lot more emotional strength now than I used to, but I'm prone to keeping things in a lot, until I can't hold it all in anymore, and then out comes a flood. Which I would definitely consider the weaker side.
Skeptical/trusting? Skeptical at first, but quick to trust and once I do trust, it seems like I never want to stop doing so. I have faith in my friends and once they've really earned my trust, it's hard to lose. Even when I really have no reason to trust them, but do anyway.
Ambitious/idle (or perhaps already content)? A bit of both, but mostly idle. When I set down a goal, I DO get to it. ...But WHEN I get to it, is the problem. Once I set myself down to do something, I will do it until it's done, even if it requires lack of sleep or what have you. I suppose the best way to put it is that it's hard for me to find true goals, since I'm often unsure of myself and my decisions.
Explain your answers as much as you can.
Do you consider yourself moody? Why or why not? Yes, I do. My mood changes often because I tend to be a very emotional person. Situations, conversation, and environment can all affect my mood.
What mood do you usually find yourself in? Kind of an in between mood, but I can lean either to a more positive or negative way at any given point. I fluctuate a heck of a lot. Unfortunately, it does tend to lead more to the negative feelings. But it will stay in a positive light if my friends need cheering up or advice or something of the like.
Which feeling have you least experienced (or don't want to experience)? I can't manage to stay angry for long. Absolutely can't do it. And I don't much like being angry, either. I'd also have to admit that I don't feel happy all that often, even though it's a feeling I would like to experience a lot more.
When someone wakes you up early in the morning, how do you usually react? Depends. I usually get up on my own either via alarm or body clock and I'm the one waiting around for someone else to get ready. But if it's a day when I don't have work or something and someone wakes me up early? I'll mumble unintelligibly, throw the blanket over my head, and go back to sleep.
What do you think of what's happened in your life so far? I wish I could change it, to be honest. I wonder what might have become of me now if I had made different choices or been a stronger person when I was younger. I wanted to have a steady job by now and find that significant other in my life, but all I've got to show for it is a rather lacking job and still no friends or acquaintances in real life. I want to be a better person and someone others can respect, but I'm not sure how to go about achieving that.
What do you imagine your future to be like? As of now, I don't really know anymore. I still believe there's someone out there for everyone and that I'll find someone to build and share my life with. I just don't know how long it's going to take, so I'm trying to be patient about it. I do have a friend online I've known for over five years now and I actually had imagined a future with him before, we'd even discussed the possibility and I dared to hope we could meet in person and see how it went from there. But I'm not sure if I can imagine that now since I'm not good enough for them anymore.
Can you tell us something (anything! Can be a song, an object, fanart, anime, food, etc.) that touched you very deeply? A lot of things in life have touched me a great deal. And one of the most significant is probably my father's poetry. Sometimes they're funny or random, but more often than not, they hold a story to them that reflects from things in every day life, to the deepest reaches of the human heart and its raw emotions, all woven beautifully through lines of words in poems. The poem he wrote for his younger brother when he died, and read at the funeral, made me burst into tears and sob for hours because it was that beautiful and heart-wrenching.
If you were Mytho and had a choice not to get one (and only one) of your heart shards back, which one would it be and why? I think all feelings are important in some way and many of them balance out one another. They have a purpose and I can respect that. But if there was just one I could stop from returning, it would be lonliness.
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