Fan Fiction
Title: The Wind That Blew My Heart Away
Ships: Tumnus/Lucy
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I own nothing. Don't sue. You'll get nothing but a collection of DVDs and some loose change.
Summary: Love is not without pain. Love is pain's most excruciating incarnation.
The Wind that Blew My Heart Away
By Brittany Laine
Chapter One
To Wish Impossible Things
It was sunset when nineteen-year-old Queen Lucy wandered out of the ball, taking refuge on a balcony over looking the beach. All of Narnia had come to Cair Paravel, celebrating the engagement of Lucy’s older sister, Queen Susan. The engagement was serving as an alliance with a prince of a neighboring land (much to her brother, High King Peter’s satisfaction). While Susan had decided to marry, Lucy, however, had not. Her decision had caused some controversy throughout the land. Many believed that if one Queen were marrying, the other shouldn’t be far behind, but Lucy had yet to even consider anyone to marry.
She was stubborn.
Many suitors had come to call on Queen Lucy at Cair Paravel, and all had been turned away. Despite her brother’s urging to choose a suitor, Lucy was firm in her ways. She would not marry for anything but love.
“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” Said a voice behind Lucy, pulling her from her reverie. Gasping, Lucy turned quickly, her dark curls falling around her face.
“Mr. Tumnus!” she cried, a bright smile lighting up her features. She jumped into his arms, hugging him tightly, and he her. “Oh, I’ve missed you!”
It had been many months since the two had seen each other, for Lucy had been kept busy by her royal duties. She regretted not having time for her most trusted and dearest friend, but there was nothing that could have been done about it.
Finally, Tumnus lowered her to the floor, and looked her over, his heart beating wildly against his chest as he took everything in. My, what a few months will do to a girl…woman, he thought. Her hair had grown, as well as her beauty. “You look radiant, Your Majesty,” he said, unwilling to let go of her hand.
Lucy smiled brightly, and felt a rosy blush creep into her cheeks; something that, in Tumnus’ mind, made her all the more beautiful. “Thank you, Mr. Tumnus. And you really mustn’t call me Your Majesty.”
“Well, why ever not? You are a Queen, and I am your loyal subject. It is how we are to address all royalty, my Queen.”
Lucy looked up at him, taken aback by his formality. They had been friends for so long that she expected him to address her on that level, rather than as a queen. To Lucy, it made absolutely no sense to address one’s dearest friend in such a manner. She stepped back, the smile fading. “Is that all you think of me, Mr. Tumnus? I am your Queen, and you are my follower, and that is the extend of our relationship?”
“No!” exclaimed Tumnus, shaking his head. Oh, what had he done? When would he ever learn that it was better to be seen and not heard? He had gone and ruined the only relationship he’d ever valued, besides that of his father, in one statement. “No, no, no,” he said, looking into her eyes. “Lucy… you are my dearest friend. You always have been, since the moment you set foot in Narnia. Of course I think more of you than just my Queen.”
“Then why can’t you address me so?”
Tumnus placed his hands on her shoulders, feeling the soft silk of her ball gown beneath his hands, and looked her in the eye. “Lucy,” he repeated. “I value you, and our friendship, above all else. You must know this.”
Lucy looked down for a moment, and took a deep breath before returning her gaze to his. She couldn’t help but blush under his stare. There was just something about it that always made her feel that way. She could always feel her cheeks become a little hot; she always felt the need to look away, and she wasn’t sure why. Slowly, she nodded her head. “Yes, I do,” she said. Reaching up, she tucked a curl behind her ear and sighed. “I apologize, Tumnus. Peter has been putting so much pressure on me recently; I think I’ve forgotten how to act civilized towards others.”
Tumnus chuckled. “You have yet to choose a suitor, I would imagine?” he questioned. He’d heard rumblings throughout the land about Lucy’s defiance against the alliances of marrying into other lands, and for some reason… it made him happy.
Lucy shook her head. “No, not yet,” she replied. She turned away from Tumnus, and looked out over the ocean, resting her hands on the cool stone balcony. “I just… I don’t see the point, I suppose. Why should I choose to marry someone whom I don’t love? That isn’t the point of marriage, and I don’t feel the need to relinquish my morals and my beliefs to form an alliance with a neighboring land to make my brother’s job easier; just because I am a queen.”
Tumnus exhaled deeply as silence fell over the two; the only sounds they heard was the distant music and chatter from the ballroom, and the soft crashing of the waves upon the shore below. It was then that Lucy realized she had not answered Tumnus’ original question.
“It is beautiful,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. Tumnus glanced over at her, and nodded, taking in the sight of her; the way the sunset cast a soft glow over her, making her look all the more angelic; the way her soft brown curls blew in the ocean breeze… everything about her that made his heart beat faster.
He nodded in agreement, but was no longer referring to the sunset, or the ocean. “Yes,” he said, simply. Not letting on to what, or whom, he was referring. He was not brave enough to be so bold and voice his opinion. He feared of what changes it would bring about to their friendship, and that was not something he wanted to endure.
***
Later that evening, in Lucy’s bedchamber, the young queen watched with a smile as Susan pranced about the room, smiling and giggling. She finally collapsed onto Lucy’s bed and sighed. “Oh, Lucy,” she said, brushing a lock of raven hair from her face. “I never quite imagined I could be this happy.”
“I’m glad for you, Susan. You certainly deserve happiness. And besides, your happiness has made Peter ecstatic. He finally got the alliance he’s been hoping for,” she pointed out, her chocolate eyes wandering toward the open window.
Susan sat up and nodded. “Yes,” she chuckled. She looked over at her sister, and noticed her distant gaze. Tilting her head, she waved her hand in front of her face, pulling her back to reality. “What’s the matter, Lucy?”
Lucy’s eyes snapped in Susan’s direction with a shake of her head. She smiled reassuringly to prove she was alright. “Nothing,” she lied. She felt awful lying to her sister; and she wasn’t very convincing at it, but she didn’t feel the need to burden her thoughts and feelings on Susan… not tonight, anyway. Tonight was a celebration of Susan’s happiness, not Lucy’s miserable state. Even now, after the party had ended, she could see that Susan was positively glowing with happiness, and she refused to ruin that for her. She just couldn’t. “I’m fine. Just a bit tired, I suppose. The ball lasted longer than I’d expected.”
Laughing, Susan kissed Lucy’s forehead and slid off of the bed. “Yes, I’m afraid it did. Get some sleep, and I will speak with you in the morning,” she said, almost knowingly. Lucy despised how her sister could do that; always tell when something was wrong, or that she was thinking something. But she didn’t express her distaste in Susan’s ability; she simply bid her older sister goodnight.
When Susan had gone, Lucy changed into her night clothes, and crawled into bed. She lay there for the longest time, staring up at the draperies above her bed; she wasn’t tired in the least bit. Finally, she huffed loudly, and pulled herself out of bed while pulling on her dress robe; she wandered over to the open doors, leading onto her balcony.
She liked to sit out there at night, under the bright full moon, and just think. It was her time to collect her thoughts, and just be at peace; something she wished she could achieve that night, but her mind refused. She was so confused.
She settled herself on the ledge, her back leaning against the castle wall. Why did her thoughts constantly drift to Tumnus? Why could she not shake him from her mind? She was well aware that he was a dear friend to her, and no one could ever really shake a friend from their mind as such, but the way she felt when she thought of him; when she was around him… it was anything but platonic.
But she was just being a foolish girl; a childhood crush resurfacing for no good reason at all. It was something that would never transpire, she knew, but why, then? Why the constant thoughts? Why the constant yearning? She feared she would never make sense of it.
When he had hugged her tonight, she felt a rush of feelings she hadn’t felt in a long while, and it frightened her. She was too frightened to say anything to him regarding any of it; she didn’t want to change their friendship. She didn’t want to drive him away, for she knew that was something she could not endure.
Ships: Tumnus/Lucy
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I own nothing. Don't sue. You'll get nothing but a collection of DVDs and some loose change.
Summary: Love is not without pain. Love is pain's most excruciating incarnation.
The Wind that Blew My Heart Away
By Brittany Laine
Chapter One
To Wish Impossible Things
It was sunset when nineteen-year-old Queen Lucy wandered out of the ball, taking refuge on a balcony over looking the beach. All of Narnia had come to Cair Paravel, celebrating the engagement of Lucy’s older sister, Queen Susan. The engagement was serving as an alliance with a prince of a neighboring land (much to her brother, High King Peter’s satisfaction). While Susan had decided to marry, Lucy, however, had not. Her decision had caused some controversy throughout the land. Many believed that if one Queen were marrying, the other shouldn’t be far behind, but Lucy had yet to even consider anyone to marry.
She was stubborn.
Many suitors had come to call on Queen Lucy at Cair Paravel, and all had been turned away. Despite her brother’s urging to choose a suitor, Lucy was firm in her ways. She would not marry for anything but love.
“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” Said a voice behind Lucy, pulling her from her reverie. Gasping, Lucy turned quickly, her dark curls falling around her face.
“Mr. Tumnus!” she cried, a bright smile lighting up her features. She jumped into his arms, hugging him tightly, and he her. “Oh, I’ve missed you!”
It had been many months since the two had seen each other, for Lucy had been kept busy by her royal duties. She regretted not having time for her most trusted and dearest friend, but there was nothing that could have been done about it.
Finally, Tumnus lowered her to the floor, and looked her over, his heart beating wildly against his chest as he took everything in. My, what a few months will do to a girl…woman, he thought. Her hair had grown, as well as her beauty. “You look radiant, Your Majesty,” he said, unwilling to let go of her hand.
Lucy smiled brightly, and felt a rosy blush creep into her cheeks; something that, in Tumnus’ mind, made her all the more beautiful. “Thank you, Mr. Tumnus. And you really mustn’t call me Your Majesty.”
“Well, why ever not? You are a Queen, and I am your loyal subject. It is how we are to address all royalty, my Queen.”
Lucy looked up at him, taken aback by his formality. They had been friends for so long that she expected him to address her on that level, rather than as a queen. To Lucy, it made absolutely no sense to address one’s dearest friend in such a manner. She stepped back, the smile fading. “Is that all you think of me, Mr. Tumnus? I am your Queen, and you are my follower, and that is the extend of our relationship?”
“No!” exclaimed Tumnus, shaking his head. Oh, what had he done? When would he ever learn that it was better to be seen and not heard? He had gone and ruined the only relationship he’d ever valued, besides that of his father, in one statement. “No, no, no,” he said, looking into her eyes. “Lucy… you are my dearest friend. You always have been, since the moment you set foot in Narnia. Of course I think more of you than just my Queen.”
“Then why can’t you address me so?”
Tumnus placed his hands on her shoulders, feeling the soft silk of her ball gown beneath his hands, and looked her in the eye. “Lucy,” he repeated. “I value you, and our friendship, above all else. You must know this.”
Lucy looked down for a moment, and took a deep breath before returning her gaze to his. She couldn’t help but blush under his stare. There was just something about it that always made her feel that way. She could always feel her cheeks become a little hot; she always felt the need to look away, and she wasn’t sure why. Slowly, she nodded her head. “Yes, I do,” she said. Reaching up, she tucked a curl behind her ear and sighed. “I apologize, Tumnus. Peter has been putting so much pressure on me recently; I think I’ve forgotten how to act civilized towards others.”
Tumnus chuckled. “You have yet to choose a suitor, I would imagine?” he questioned. He’d heard rumblings throughout the land about Lucy’s defiance against the alliances of marrying into other lands, and for some reason… it made him happy.
Lucy shook her head. “No, not yet,” she replied. She turned away from Tumnus, and looked out over the ocean, resting her hands on the cool stone balcony. “I just… I don’t see the point, I suppose. Why should I choose to marry someone whom I don’t love? That isn’t the point of marriage, and I don’t feel the need to relinquish my morals and my beliefs to form an alliance with a neighboring land to make my brother’s job easier; just because I am a queen.”
Tumnus exhaled deeply as silence fell over the two; the only sounds they heard was the distant music and chatter from the ballroom, and the soft crashing of the waves upon the shore below. It was then that Lucy realized she had not answered Tumnus’ original question.
“It is beautiful,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. Tumnus glanced over at her, and nodded, taking in the sight of her; the way the sunset cast a soft glow over her, making her look all the more angelic; the way her soft brown curls blew in the ocean breeze… everything about her that made his heart beat faster.
He nodded in agreement, but was no longer referring to the sunset, or the ocean. “Yes,” he said, simply. Not letting on to what, or whom, he was referring. He was not brave enough to be so bold and voice his opinion. He feared of what changes it would bring about to their friendship, and that was not something he wanted to endure.
***
Later that evening, in Lucy’s bedchamber, the young queen watched with a smile as Susan pranced about the room, smiling and giggling. She finally collapsed onto Lucy’s bed and sighed. “Oh, Lucy,” she said, brushing a lock of raven hair from her face. “I never quite imagined I could be this happy.”
“I’m glad for you, Susan. You certainly deserve happiness. And besides, your happiness has made Peter ecstatic. He finally got the alliance he’s been hoping for,” she pointed out, her chocolate eyes wandering toward the open window.
Susan sat up and nodded. “Yes,” she chuckled. She looked over at her sister, and noticed her distant gaze. Tilting her head, she waved her hand in front of her face, pulling her back to reality. “What’s the matter, Lucy?”
Lucy’s eyes snapped in Susan’s direction with a shake of her head. She smiled reassuringly to prove she was alright. “Nothing,” she lied. She felt awful lying to her sister; and she wasn’t very convincing at it, but she didn’t feel the need to burden her thoughts and feelings on Susan… not tonight, anyway. Tonight was a celebration of Susan’s happiness, not Lucy’s miserable state. Even now, after the party had ended, she could see that Susan was positively glowing with happiness, and she refused to ruin that for her. She just couldn’t. “I’m fine. Just a bit tired, I suppose. The ball lasted longer than I’d expected.”
Laughing, Susan kissed Lucy’s forehead and slid off of the bed. “Yes, I’m afraid it did. Get some sleep, and I will speak with you in the morning,” she said, almost knowingly. Lucy despised how her sister could do that; always tell when something was wrong, or that she was thinking something. But she didn’t express her distaste in Susan’s ability; she simply bid her older sister goodnight.
When Susan had gone, Lucy changed into her night clothes, and crawled into bed. She lay there for the longest time, staring up at the draperies above her bed; she wasn’t tired in the least bit. Finally, she huffed loudly, and pulled herself out of bed while pulling on her dress robe; she wandered over to the open doors, leading onto her balcony.
She liked to sit out there at night, under the bright full moon, and just think. It was her time to collect her thoughts, and just be at peace; something she wished she could achieve that night, but her mind refused. She was so confused.
She settled herself on the ledge, her back leaning against the castle wall. Why did her thoughts constantly drift to Tumnus? Why could she not shake him from her mind? She was well aware that he was a dear friend to her, and no one could ever really shake a friend from their mind as such, but the way she felt when she thought of him; when she was around him… it was anything but platonic.
But she was just being a foolish girl; a childhood crush resurfacing for no good reason at all. It was something that would never transpire, she knew, but why, then? Why the constant thoughts? Why the constant yearning? She feared she would never make sense of it.
When he had hugged her tonight, she felt a rush of feelings she hadn’t felt in a long while, and it frightened her. She was too frightened to say anything to him regarding any of it; she didn’t want to change their friendship. She didn’t want to drive him away, for she knew that was something she could not endure.