June 10th, 2007's Tsuushin
I tried...
I read a transcript of this on some Japanese fan site and laughed my way through...but I think a lot got lost in my shit translation job.
Just imagine Subaru going "iyaya!" or "akan!" every time you see the words "no," "no good," or "hopeless" ...basically after each suggestion.
After the first commercial break (they talked about their feature in Kansaiwalker)...
Hina : This is Murakami Shingo, and the members are...
Suba : (yells something random)! Shibutani Subaru here.
Yasu : (copies Subaru)! It's Yasuda Shota.
Okura : What is this? Ahahaha, Okura Tadayoshi here.
Hina : Tonight we're doing an emergency project to decide a hobby for Shibutani-san. But before that, we have a letter here from someone who's really troubled over something, can we do a Discussion Story [name of this segment they do where they answer listener's worries]?
Suba : No
Hina : Just one?
Suba : Why?
Yasu : Is she really conflicted?
Hina : Yes, she is very worried about this.
Yasu : Ehhhh.
Suba : I'm also very worried (about my hobby thing) too.
Hina : I understand that but…
Yasu : Let's listen to it.
Suba : Well, let's listen.
Hina (reads letter) : “I’m worried over the fact that whenever I drink carbonic drinks (like coke), I always hiccup. It’s really big too, even my family is surprised. It’s fine when I’m at home but I’m afraid if it happens while I’m outside. Please tell me a good way to stop hiccups.”
Yasu and Okura laugh and want to hear this hiccup for themselves. Subaru gets mad and yells that she should just stop drinking that stuff.
Hina : Emergency Project! Let’s find a hobby for Shibutani Subaru-san!
All : (claps)
Suba : Thank you very much.
First, Hina gets Subaru to say some of his hobbies…after some hmmming and ehhing, they get out of him that he likes secondhand clothes, takes pictures with his digital camera, plays football and his guitar. After that, they’re kinda stuck…and here’s where the suggestions start :
Yasu : Sneakers! Secondhand clothes are secondhand clothes, but you have a lot of sneakers.
Doesn’t count, cause they include it in “secondhand clothes.”
Okura : Surfing?
Suba : I can’t do it, ahahahahaha.
All : Ahahahahahaha.
Someone : Man you’re stupid.
Okura : No, I’ve read it in a magazine.
Suba : There was a time I’ve done it…
Hina : Ohhhhh, but you don’t do it now?
Suba : Not now.
Hina : This means that you don’t have your own board?
Suba : Nope. I have a wet suit.
Okura : Well…can you dive?
Suba : No, but I'm hopeless (at it).
Okura : Why?
Subaru doesn’t get to answer him because Hina cuts in to ask if it’s fine that they’re offer him ideas, then Yasu talks.
Yasu : Mountain Climbing! What about mountain climbing?
All : Ahahahahahahaahahahaha.
Okura : He’ll probably hate it if he goes mountain climbing!
Suba : Yuck.
All: Hahahahaaha.
Suba : Do this properly!
All : Hahahahaah.
Suba : It doesn’t need to be funny. Cause I’m serious about this.
Hina : Ah, you are?!
Yasu : I’m sorry, but isn’t it cool doing mountain climbing at this age?
Suba : It’s not cool!
Yasu : A character that loves the forest…hahaa, it’s also eco.
Suba : Nah…that’s okay (I’ll pass).
Hina : What about traveling?
Suba : This is also…first. First, the problem is I can’t go anywhere by myself right?
Okura : Ahhh, I see.
Hina :Ahhhh.
Suba : And…I don’t have friends other than members.
Hina : Uh huh, the kind to go traveling with…
Suba : Yes. Ah! So, hobby is fine and all, but first can you guys introduce me to some friends?
All : Aahahahhahaahaha.
Yasu : The project’s changing eh?
Hina : Shouldn’t you go find friends yourself? I don’t know if my friends will get alone with Subaru or not.
Yasu : That is so.
Okura : What about a trying a different musical instrument?
Hina : If you increase your hobbies, maybe you can make friends (that way).
Okura : Really…
Suba : A different instrument?
Yasu : How about trying the Blues Harp (kind of Harmonica), Shibutani-san? Didn’t you play it a long time ago? Isn’t that pretty good? The Blues Harp.
Hina: Is it no good?
Suba : It’s not no good or anything but…
Hina : But you can’t confine yourself inside…playing the Blues Harp?
Yasu : Right, you don’t play it much outside.
Suba : I still haven’t gotten the feeling that it fits me up to now…
Yasu : Wouldn’t it be good if you played the Blues Harp while mountain climbing?
All : Hahahahahaahhaa.
Suba : You! Take this seriously, dude!
Okura : Why mountain climbing, quit it with the mountain climbing, ahaha.
Suba : What am I going to do! If a bunch a bears come up to me!
All : Ahahahaahahaha.
Suba : Are you stupid?
Okura : Gahh, (the image of Subaru) wearing a backpack…
All : Ahahahahahaa.
Suba : All my friends will be animals!
All : Ahahahahahahahaha.
Hina : That’ll be cool, no?
Yasu : That’ll be awesome.
Suba : This one’s no good.
Okura : Stop it with the mountain climbing, it’s still too early. << age-wise? I don’t know.
Suba : There’s probably one (hobby) that fits right? Yasu’s got his clothes, Okura suits picture-taking, and Murakami is soccer. Find one that fits me.
Hina : One that suits you…what could it be? Ah! Cooking?
Suba : No yo, that’s impossible.
Hina : No good?
Suba : No good, cooking…I’ll be at home all the time.
Hina : You can have a home party!
Suba : Nononono.
Okura : Why?
Yasu : He really denied it.
Suba : Nono…I don’t really want people to come (over).
All : Ahahahahahaah.
Hina : If you don’t want people to come, what about drawing by yourself?
Suba : Gahhh, I’ll definitely hate that.
Yasu : It’ll be good if you did ceramics.
Suba : Wha?!
Yasu : You definitely suit working with a potter’s wheel. It’s working with your hands.
Hina : That’s retirement, haha, if you did that.
Yasu : Um, and making teacups. They do that a lot in Kyoto.
Suba : That’s no good.
Okura : What if you did stuff like Manzai (comedic stuff)?
Suba : I’m gonna hit you.
All : Ahahahahaah.
Hina : What about collecting something?
Suba : Like what, for example?
Hina : For example…like watches.
Suba : I don’t have interest in watches…and I don’t know anything about them…
Hina : Ah I see, but if you have something to collect…
Okura : Sneakers, like rare sneakers…
Suba : That’s also secondhand clothes no?
Yasu : Shibuyan, what about fishing?
Hina : Fishing is good, it suits you.
Yasu : Isn’t your brother a fishing demon?
Hina : Go with your brother.
Suba : Nonono, I like it but my brother likes it too much. My brother, he really…
Hina : You should go fish together.
Suba : No, my brother who I went to the same elementary school with, he likes fishing so much that he used to piss off the school by fishing in the pond in the courtyard.
All : Ahahahahahaha.
Suba : It was all carp!
All : Ahahahahaha.
Suba : They told him he couldn’t fish there but it was useless. He likes it too much and couldn’t control himself.
Hina : What about raising something?
Suba : What?
Hina : Like keeping a pet.
Suba : That’s no good, I have to all over the place with work.
Hina : What’s with you?! It’s all “No! No! No!”
All : Ahaahahahahhahah.
Suba : But…but if I have a dog, I can’t take care of it when I’m here and here, it’ll be really sad.
Hina : What about making something?
Suba : Make what?
Hina : Like…
Suba : You’ve become a bit reluctant!
All : Ahahahaaha.
Suba : Don’t get mad, cause you’re seriously thinking about this.
Hina : Ahaha, like…um…something like puzzles.
Suba : What is this?! Definitely not!
Yasu : Puzzle! Puzzle! Aahahahahahahah.
Suba : I won’t even walk one step out the door!
Hina : You said you didn’t want to see people!
Suba : It’s okay if it ties to a direction in which I can meet people.
Hina : I got it! I got it! Walking (=strolling)! Walking! Go walk!
Yasu : That’s old age’s life!
Suba : Nooo…
Okura : What about car?
Suba : Eh?
Okura : Car.
Suba : Car’s also…
Okura : Something like…the interior…
Hina : Like interior design.
Okura : Like that, customize it yourself…like a tiny cute car.
Hina : I got it! Collecting cell phones!
All : Ahahaahhaahahah.
Suba : No.
Hina : Collecting cell phones.
All : Aahahahahaha.
Hina : Collect a bunch of old ones.
All : Ahahahahaah.
Suba : That’s enough. You guys…do this properly! Not like this! Hurry up and play a song!
Yasu : Then, please listen to “arigato.”
They do that comic introduction segment and the comic this time was about cooking.
Hina : Cook!
Suba : He said, “Cook!” (like he’s ordering me to)
Okura : Hahaha.
Hina : Do it.
Suba : Cooking…um…to some degrees, I can’t do it.
Hina : Really? Don’t you cook for yourself?
Suba : Uhhhhh…
Okura : Camping?
Suba : Hate it.
Okura : Why?
Suba : It’s no good, it’s tiring.
Okura : Isn’t it fun?
Suba : If everyone goes, but I’ve said I don’t have friends.
All : Ahahahaah.
Suba : What am I gonna do if I go myself and get lost!
All : Ahahahaahahah.
Yasu : He can’t come back, ahahaha.
Hina : Driving?
Suba : Driving is no good, by myself?
Hina : By youself.
Suba : No!
Hina : No?
Suba : I don’t know the roads.
Hina : They have navigation systems now.
Suba : I don’t’ know where to set the navigation system to go.
Hina : Like, going to a place where there’s lots of scenery.
Suba : I don’t have interest in that…
Hina : Ahh…
Yasu : What about like just going straight and see how far you can go?
Suba : …that’s no good too.
Yasu : No?
Suba : What is this?
Yasu : Don’t know where you’re going to reach…
Suba : I’ll be done right away (just going straight) , no?
All : Ahahahaah.
Suba : Really think about this!
Okura : It’s hard.
Yasu : It is.
Suba : Make it me-ish. Something that can I look like I can do.
Hina : Something Subaru looks like he can do…
Suba Please really think about my personality…
Hina : Based on everything and thinking about it……….there’s nothing?
Suba : …why?!
All : Aahahahahahaha.
Okura : But we’ve said pretty much…
Yasu : We have.
Suba : But this…you don’t say it properly.
All : We did!
Hina : Movie watching.
Suba : Hmmmmmm.
Yasu : Hmmm, but you go watch them often.
Hina : Really?
Yasu : You like cosplay right?
Suba : I do like cosplay.
Yasu : What about that, as your hobby?
Suba : Dude, this…I can’t go out.
All : Ahahaahahhaa
Hina : Cycling?
Suba : No.
It’s nearing the end of the show, Hina brings up cooking again, to tie it back with that comic talk they did. Subaru wants them to make this into a regular corner and asks listeners to send in suggestions for him.
Suba : We’ll be definitely recruiting for this…something interesting would be good. I say this, but please make it serious and real. Really. I’ll get mad and really go to the house of anyone who writes in anything funny.
...yeah.
I read a transcript of this on some Japanese fan site and laughed my way through...but I think a lot got lost in my shit translation job.
Just imagine Subaru going "iyaya!" or "akan!" every time you see the words "no," "no good," or "hopeless" ...basically after each suggestion.
After the first commercial break (they talked about their feature in Kansaiwalker)...
Hina : This is Murakami Shingo, and the members are...
Suba : (yells something random)! Shibutani Subaru here.
Yasu : (copies Subaru)! It's Yasuda Shota.
Okura : What is this? Ahahaha, Okura Tadayoshi here.
Hina : Tonight we're doing an emergency project to decide a hobby for Shibutani-san. But before that, we have a letter here from someone who's really troubled over something, can we do a Discussion Story [name of this segment they do where they answer listener's worries]?
Suba : No
Hina : Just one?
Suba : Why?
Yasu : Is she really conflicted?
Hina : Yes, she is very worried about this.
Yasu : Ehhhh.
Suba : I'm also very worried (about my hobby thing) too.
Hina : I understand that but…
Yasu : Let's listen to it.
Suba : Well, let's listen.
Hina (reads letter) : “I’m worried over the fact that whenever I drink carbonic drinks (like coke), I always hiccup. It’s really big too, even my family is surprised. It’s fine when I’m at home but I’m afraid if it happens while I’m outside. Please tell me a good way to stop hiccups.”
Yasu and Okura laugh and want to hear this hiccup for themselves. Subaru gets mad and yells that she should just stop drinking that stuff.
Hina : Emergency Project! Let’s find a hobby for Shibutani Subaru-san!
All : (claps)
Suba : Thank you very much.
First, Hina gets Subaru to say some of his hobbies…after some hmmming and ehhing, they get out of him that he likes secondhand clothes, takes pictures with his digital camera, plays football and his guitar. After that, they’re kinda stuck…and here’s where the suggestions start :
Yasu : Sneakers! Secondhand clothes are secondhand clothes, but you have a lot of sneakers.
Doesn’t count, cause they include it in “secondhand clothes.”
Okura : Surfing?
Suba : I can’t do it, ahahahahaha.
All : Ahahahahahaha.
Someone : Man you’re stupid.
Okura : No, I’ve read it in a magazine.
Suba : There was a time I’ve done it…
Hina : Ohhhhh, but you don’t do it now?
Suba : Not now.
Hina : This means that you don’t have your own board?
Suba : Nope. I have a wet suit.
Okura : Well…can you dive?
Suba : No, but I'm hopeless (at it).
Okura : Why?
Subaru doesn’t get to answer him because Hina cuts in to ask if it’s fine that they’re offer him ideas, then Yasu talks.
Yasu : Mountain Climbing! What about mountain climbing?
All : Ahahahahahahaahahahaha.
Okura : He’ll probably hate it if he goes mountain climbing!
Suba : Yuck.
All: Hahahahaaha.
Suba : Do this properly!
All : Hahahahaah.
Suba : It doesn’t need to be funny. Cause I’m serious about this.
Hina : Ah, you are?!
Yasu : I’m sorry, but isn’t it cool doing mountain climbing at this age?
Suba : It’s not cool!
Yasu : A character that loves the forest…hahaa, it’s also eco.
Suba : Nah…that’s okay (I’ll pass).
Hina : What about traveling?
Suba : This is also…first. First, the problem is I can’t go anywhere by myself right?
Okura : Ahhh, I see.
Hina :Ahhhh.
Suba : And…I don’t have friends other than members.
Hina : Uh huh, the kind to go traveling with…
Suba : Yes. Ah! So, hobby is fine and all, but first can you guys introduce me to some friends?
All : Aahahahhahaahaha.
Yasu : The project’s changing eh?
Hina : Shouldn’t you go find friends yourself? I don’t know if my friends will get alone with Subaru or not.
Yasu : That is so.
Okura : What about a trying a different musical instrument?
Hina : If you increase your hobbies, maybe you can make friends (that way).
Okura : Really…
Suba : A different instrument?
Yasu : How about trying the Blues Harp (kind of Harmonica), Shibutani-san? Didn’t you play it a long time ago? Isn’t that pretty good? The Blues Harp.
Hina: Is it no good?
Suba : It’s not no good or anything but…
Hina : But you can’t confine yourself inside…playing the Blues Harp?
Yasu : Right, you don’t play it much outside.
Suba : I still haven’t gotten the feeling that it fits me up to now…
Yasu : Wouldn’t it be good if you played the Blues Harp while mountain climbing?
All : Hahahahahaahhaa.
Suba : You! Take this seriously, dude!
Okura : Why mountain climbing, quit it with the mountain climbing, ahaha.
Suba : What am I going to do! If a bunch a bears come up to me!
All : Ahahahaahahaha.
Suba : Are you stupid?
Okura : Gahh, (the image of Subaru) wearing a backpack…
All : Ahahahahahaa.
Suba : All my friends will be animals!
All : Ahahahahahahahaha.
Hina : That’ll be cool, no?
Yasu : That’ll be awesome.
Suba : This one’s no good.
Okura : Stop it with the mountain climbing, it’s still too early. << age-wise? I don’t know.
Suba : There’s probably one (hobby) that fits right? Yasu’s got his clothes, Okura suits picture-taking, and Murakami is soccer. Find one that fits me.
Hina : One that suits you…what could it be? Ah! Cooking?
Suba : No yo, that’s impossible.
Hina : No good?
Suba : No good, cooking…I’ll be at home all the time.
Hina : You can have a home party!
Suba : Nononono.
Okura : Why?
Yasu : He really denied it.
Suba : Nono…I don’t really want people to come (over).
All : Ahahahahahaah.
Hina : If you don’t want people to come, what about drawing by yourself?
Suba : Gahhh, I’ll definitely hate that.
Yasu : It’ll be good if you did ceramics.
Suba : Wha?!
Yasu : You definitely suit working with a potter’s wheel. It’s working with your hands.
Hina : That’s retirement, haha, if you did that.
Yasu : Um, and making teacups. They do that a lot in Kyoto.
Suba : That’s no good.
Okura : What if you did stuff like Manzai (comedic stuff)?
Suba : I’m gonna hit you.
All : Ahahahahaah.
Hina : What about collecting something?
Suba : Like what, for example?
Hina : For example…like watches.
Suba : I don’t have interest in watches…and I don’t know anything about them…
Hina : Ah I see, but if you have something to collect…
Okura : Sneakers, like rare sneakers…
Suba : That’s also secondhand clothes no?
Yasu : Shibuyan, what about fishing?
Hina : Fishing is good, it suits you.
Yasu : Isn’t your brother a fishing demon?
Hina : Go with your brother.
Suba : Nonono, I like it but my brother likes it too much. My brother, he really…
Hina : You should go fish together.
Suba : No, my brother who I went to the same elementary school with, he likes fishing so much that he used to piss off the school by fishing in the pond in the courtyard.
All : Ahahahahahaha.
Suba : It was all carp!
All : Ahahahahaha.
Suba : They told him he couldn’t fish there but it was useless. He likes it too much and couldn’t control himself.
Hina : What about raising something?
Suba : What?
Hina : Like keeping a pet.
Suba : That’s no good, I have to all over the place with work.
Hina : What’s with you?! It’s all “No! No! No!”
All : Ahaahahahahhahah.
Suba : But…but if I have a dog, I can’t take care of it when I’m here and here, it’ll be really sad.
Hina : What about making something?
Suba : Make what?
Hina : Like…
Suba : You’ve become a bit reluctant!
All : Ahahahaaha.
Suba : Don’t get mad, cause you’re seriously thinking about this.
Hina : Ahaha, like…um…something like puzzles.
Suba : What is this?! Definitely not!
Yasu : Puzzle! Puzzle! Aahahahahahahah.
Suba : I won’t even walk one step out the door!
Hina : You said you didn’t want to see people!
Suba : It’s okay if it ties to a direction in which I can meet people.
Hina : I got it! I got it! Walking (=strolling)! Walking! Go walk!
Yasu : That’s old age’s life!
Suba : Nooo…
Okura : What about car?
Suba : Eh?
Okura : Car.
Suba : Car’s also…
Okura : Something like…the interior…
Hina : Like interior design.
Okura : Like that, customize it yourself…like a tiny cute car.
Hina : I got it! Collecting cell phones!
All : Ahahaahhaahahah.
Suba : No.
Hina : Collecting cell phones.
All : Aahahahahaha.
Hina : Collect a bunch of old ones.
All : Ahahahahaah.
Suba : That’s enough. You guys…do this properly! Not like this! Hurry up and play a song!
Yasu : Then, please listen to “arigato.”
They do that comic introduction segment and the comic this time was about cooking.
Hina : Cook!
Suba : He said, “Cook!” (like he’s ordering me to)
Okura : Hahaha.
Hina : Do it.
Suba : Cooking…um…to some degrees, I can’t do it.
Hina : Really? Don’t you cook for yourself?
Suba : Uhhhhh…
Okura : Camping?
Suba : Hate it.
Okura : Why?
Suba : It’s no good, it’s tiring.
Okura : Isn’t it fun?
Suba : If everyone goes, but I’ve said I don’t have friends.
All : Ahahahaah.
Suba : What am I gonna do if I go myself and get lost!
All : Ahahahaahahah.
Yasu : He can’t come back, ahahaha.
Hina : Driving?
Suba : Driving is no good, by myself?
Hina : By youself.
Suba : No!
Hina : No?
Suba : I don’t know the roads.
Hina : They have navigation systems now.
Suba : I don’t’ know where to set the navigation system to go.
Hina : Like, going to a place where there’s lots of scenery.
Suba : I don’t have interest in that…
Hina : Ahh…
Yasu : What about like just going straight and see how far you can go?
Suba : …that’s no good too.
Yasu : No?
Suba : What is this?
Yasu : Don’t know where you’re going to reach…
Suba : I’ll be done right away (just going straight) , no?
All : Ahahahaah.
Suba : Really think about this!
Okura : It’s hard.
Yasu : It is.
Suba : Make it me-ish. Something that can I look like I can do.
Hina : Something Subaru looks like he can do…
Suba Please really think about my personality…
Hina : Based on everything and thinking about it……….there’s nothing?
Suba : …why?!
All : Aahahahahahaha.
Okura : But we’ve said pretty much…
Yasu : We have.
Suba : But this…you don’t say it properly.
All : We did!
Hina : Movie watching.
Suba : Hmmmmmm.
Yasu : Hmmm, but you go watch them often.
Hina : Really?
Yasu : You like cosplay right?
Suba : I do like cosplay.
Yasu : What about that, as your hobby?
Suba : Dude, this…I can’t go out.
All : Ahahaahahhaa
Hina : Cycling?
Suba : No.
It’s nearing the end of the show, Hina brings up cooking again, to tie it back with that comic talk they did. Subaru wants them to make this into a regular corner and asks listeners to send in suggestions for him.
Suba : We’ll be definitely recruiting for this…something interesting would be good. I say this, but please make it serious and real. Really. I’ll get mad and really go to the house of anyone who writes in anything funny.
...yeah.