Crossover } Circumstances of Heartbreaking Interest - Part 3
Word Count: 1726
Genre: General, Humour. Devolves into Crack during the Epilogue.
Fandom: Kingdom Hearts and Twilight
Ships?: Mentions Carlisle/Esme, Rosalie/Emmett, Jasper/Alice, and Edward/Bella.
→Friendships?: Original Six. Also: Alice&Xigbar. (Yeah, that's right.)
Characters: Vexen, Zexion, Carlisle Cullen, Esme Cullen, Xaldin, Xigbar, Alice Cullen, Rosalie Hale, Jasper Hale, Lexaeus, Emmett Cullen, and Saïx.
→Mentions: Xemnas.
Rating: G.
Spoilers: Breaking Dawn - Unknown chapter, presumably towards the end; KHII - Second visit to Land of Dragons
Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts, Twilight or any related characters. This was written out of enjoyment of the series, and no profit is being made.
Notes: Will the final part be made of as much fail as Breaking Dawn apparently is? Well, I wouldn't know, I don't intend to read it.
Thank you to all who have read to the end of my first-ever completed multi-chapter project! 8D (...Can you imagine if this fic had a blooper reel? I would never stop watching it.)
In which It All Comes Together in a Neat Little Package. Well, It Does. Sorry if I Sounded Sarcastic.
Circumstances of Heartbreaking Interest
Part 3
“Do you take sugar in your tea?” the vampire with the caramel hair and sticky-sweet smile asked.
Zexion observed from behind his bangs. It was a genuine kindness that shone in her gold eyes. It showed in the upwards curve of lips, the angle of her eyelids. “Yes, please,” he said. He leaned forward as Esme Cullen poured a spoonful into his cup and stirred.
Her husband smiled on the couch next to her as the two leaned back into the cushions. “I see your friend is a psychologist,” he addressed the scientist.
Vexen smiled. “I suppose you could say that.”
The ‘psychologist’ blinked. “Oh, my apologies. Am I analyzing body language again?”
Vexen shrugged. “It’s a force of habit. You’ve been doing it for two lifetimes now.”
“Yeah, man,” Xigbar spoke up. “Stop checking out the married lady.”
Zexion turned to look over the back of the couch. “You’re the one who flirted with an eighteen-year-old earlier today, Xigbar.”
The man sneered, taking his eyes off the chessboard. “I wasn’t serious about it. Geeze.” He picked up one of his white knights and moved it. “Your turn,” he addressed Xaldin, sitting across from him.
The vampire with the pixie cut, playing spectator, groaned. “Shouldn’t have done that.”
“Miss, if our method of playing chess, the one that doesn’t involve precognition, bothers you, you might as well leave. It’s the only method we have,” Xaldin said.
Zexion turned back. “Sorry about that. Where were we?”
“I was just wondering how your circulatory system works... You really don’t have a heartbeat?”
“No heart at all.”
“Do you mind if I...?” Dr. Cullen fingered his black doctor’s bag, sitting at his feet.
Vexen laughed. “Not at all.”
The vampire snapped the bag open and took out a stethoscope. He pressed the cold metal to Vexen’s white shirt (the Nobodies had chosen to unzip their jackets in the quiet of the house).
He grinned eagerly, like a child in Christmas Town. Vexen in particular smelled of cold metal and glass, breaking ice and thickening mist. Like an icebox and all the little wires and lights needed to run it. All within utter silence. Another species without a heartbeat. Fascinating.
He gave the ear buds to his wife, who also smiled. “Fascinating,” she echoed his thoughts. (Outside the polite atmosphere of the two couches, Xaldin made a particularly devastating move with a bishop. Alice Cullen offered a high-five, nodding her approval very seriously. She lowered it after Xaldin chose not to respond.)
“So let me get this straight. You don’t have hearts, but you still have blood?” asked the doctor.
“And all other fluids,” Zexion added, sipping his tea.
“It’s still mostly a mystery, I’m afraid to admit,” Vexen nodded. “We suspect most of our systems are built heavily upon magic.”
All the vampires in the room looked up at that, even the gorgeous blonde leaning against the glass window, waiting for her husband to return with Lexaeus. (She had silenced Xigbar with a single glare.) There was an uneasy silence that didn’t last long, as Jasper, the third blond (but really, who were the Nobodies to make comments about that?) Cullen descended the stairs. “We know that magic exists,” he explained as he walked into the living room. “We’re just not used to thinking of it that way.”
“Hmm,” Vexen nodded again. “Most of our powers are based purely in the physical realm. Except Zexion here.”
“‘Most’ being the key word, there, Vex.” Xigbar checked Alice’s face as his hand hovered over a rook, but her face remained blank. “I have powers over what we’ve decided is ‘space’, but we still haven’t found out what that means exactly.”
The Cullens collectively raised their eyebrows as the Freeshooter spoke. Xaldin spoke as he made his move. “He gets far too philosophical about it for his own good sometimes. Checkmate, by the way.”
Xigbar sat back in his chair, looking annoyed. “Pot calling the kettle black,” he grumbled, in response to the philosophy comment. Xaldin grinned.
Esme laughed softly. “Edward would be having a heyday, don’t you think, Jasper?”
“Hmm,” the young man smiled, albeit somewhat tightly, crossing his arms over his chest. “Five brilliant minds completely unaffected by emotion. And one that seems eerily similar to a werewolf.”
“Speaking of which...” Alice let her sentence drift off.
“Saïx heading back?” Vexen asked, mixing some honey into his tea.
“No... But he will, very soon.” She smiled widely at Xigbar. “I’m so ominous, aren’t I?”
“Xaldin, you have to at least let me take this one home. She’s too adorable.”
“No.”
“Is Emmett with them?” Jasper asked.
“Yes. Your brother wanted to test his strength against our friend’s,” Zexion answered. He smiled smugly. “I wonder how that turned out.”
The vampire smirked right back. “Would you like to make a bet?” Alice giggled.
“Doctor,” Vexen addressed Carlisle. “Once your son and our teammates return, it’d be best that we leave. If I can ask one last question-”
“Stop being so polite,” Esme smiled and placed a hand on her husband’s leg. The gold bands on their fingers glinted as he automatically closed his fingers around hers, a second nature.
Vexen smiled, suddenly uncomfortably aware of how much incredulity they had shown towards it privately. “Well, to be purely honest with you, we wonder why you sparkle.”
The Nobodies wished desperately for crickets to fill the silence, but nothing came.
“In sunlight,” Xigbar added helpfully.
“We know when we sparkle,” Rosalie spat at him.
“If we’re being impolite, just tell us,” Zexion stood up. The woman glared daggers at his peacekeeping attempt, so Alice intervened.
“It’s not impolite in the slightest. Sometimes it just sort of makes us feel like pansies.”
“Thank you,” Xigbar sighed. It was the least sarcastic thing he had said in ages.
Carlisle spoke before Alice or anyone else could respond. “It’s the venom, as I explained earlier. I haven’t been able to explore it thoroughly, but I’ll give you the best hypothesis I have. During the transformation, the venom hardens each skin cell. As far as I can tell, the effects of sunlight on our skin is caused by the hardening of each individual cell to the point that each cell acts as a... mirror. A facet.”
“...Remarkable.” Not even his companions could tell if Vexen was being sarcastic as he raised an eyebrow.
Carlisle half-smiled. “Mm. I would investigate it further, but I haven’t been able to collect a skin sample from myself. It’d be akin to trying to chip a diamond.”
“And the only thing that can chip a diamond is another diamond,” the Chilly Academic cringed at the thought. “I understand your reluctance.”
“Well! Now that that’s settled, it’s time to say goodbye,” Alice chirped, shaking Xaldin’s hand enthusiastically.
Before anyone could properly respond, the front door burst open. “Everyone. We’re leaving. Now.”
The Nobodies who were still seated were on their feet in a blink of an eye. “Lexaeus?”
“Where’s Emmett?” Rosalie strode forward easily, ready and willing to rip apart the Silent Hero to get to her husband.
Who came into the doorway two seconds later. “Right here, Rose. Geeze, two second delay, and I’m suddenly in mortal peril?”
The Nobodies zipped up their jackets as they saw the dark-haired vampire was carrying Saïx over his shoulder, convulsing with a barely-contained fury. “...Immortal peril?” Emmett wondered aloud as though he wasn’t carrying a highly dangerous berserker around on his shoulder.
“What happened?” Zexion asked.
“Went out into the woods to talk to the Quileutes, like dad said,” Emmett began.
“Unfortunately, there appears to be another breed of werewolf passing through the area,” Lexaeus added.
All the vampires snapped to attention. “Children of the Moon,” Jasper stated.
“Meaning?” Xaldin this time.
“Werewolves that transform under the influence of the full moon.”
There was a pause. “Wait. You mean there are breeds of werewolf that don’t follow that rule?” Vexen asked.
“Man, this place is weird. And I’ve seen weird,” Xigbar said.
“You must’ve. Your buddy here had a very interesting talk with them,” Emmett shrugged to indicate the blue-haired Nobody on his shoulder.
“We’ll just say the conversation upset both sides. Just,” Lexaeus lifted a hand as Zexion opened his mouth, “leave it at that.”
“We’re leaving when Saïx caused a problem?” Xigbar frowned. “That’s hardly fair, is it?”
“Xigbar, you cause problems in worlds and leave them unattended to all the time,” Xaldin scolded. “You’re just upset you didn’t get to hunt anything.”
“...Quiet, you.”
“Remember,” Lexaeus ignored that exchange, taking the still struggling Saïx onto his own shoulder, “upper cut to the jaw. Judging by the size of those wolves, it should just stun them. Besides, I’m not entirely sure how physiology works here, judging from what I’ve seen.”
Emmett’s laughter boomed off the walls. “Sure thing, buddy. Upper cut to the chin. Now take your weird werewolf pal and split.”
“Men,” Lexaeus announced to his old friends, and walked out the door towards the Gummi ship. Vexen and Zexion nodded politely to the doctor and his wife and the two blond ‘siblings’ before leaving. Xaldin did the same to Alice, while Xigbar just laughed and waved as he followed past her.
They crossed the lawn, the odd calm of battle approaching thick in the air. Lexaeus disappeared up the gangplank into the ship, his four companions following behind.
“So...” Vexen started. “What exactly are we going to say to the Superior about this world again?”
“Not nearly enough battle,” Xigbar grumped.
“Messed up science,” Xaldin scratched his nose.
Zexion shrugged. “The people seem interesting enough.” He looked over his shoulder, back towards the Cullen house. “I wouldn’t mind coming back to visit. Just as long as they don’t walk around calling each other ‘statues of Aphrodite or Adonis’ or something.”
---Epilogue---
And thus did the Cullen Family* proceed to kick some Children of the Moon butt. Emmett lead the attack with only Lexaeus’s ‘upper-cut to the chin’ strategy, and as we all know, was an utter badass about it.
*Minus their Manipulative Bastard™ Edward, who was still having a psychologically fascinating (and not the good kind) conversation with Bella back at the house.
Emmett was slightly disappointed, however, when the dust cleared and they all realized Esme had rendered the most werewolves unconscious.
Mama, after all, did say knock you out.
The End
SaïxKirk Thornton
XigbarJames Patrick Stuart
VexenDerek Stephen Prince
XaldinDavid Dayan Fisher
ZexionVincent Corazza
LexaeusDave Boat
Jacob BlackTaylor Lautner
Edward CullenRobert Pattinson
Bella SwanKristen Stewart
Carlisle CullenPeter Facinelli
Esme CullenElizabeth Reaser
Alice CullenAshley Greene
Rosalie HaleNikki Reed
Jasper HaleJackson Rathbone
Emmett CullenKellan Lutz
Much thanks to cygna_hime, sentienttoaster, animejosse and sparkism, for the encouragement to actually write this thing. xD
Part 2 ← Part 3
Chapter Listing
Genre: General, Humour. Devolves into Crack during the Epilogue.
Fandom: Kingdom Hearts and Twilight
Ships?: Mentions Carlisle/Esme, Rosalie/Emmett, Jasper/Alice, and Edward/Bella.
→Friendships?: Original Six. Also: Alice&Xigbar. (Yeah, that's right.)
Characters: Vexen, Zexion, Carlisle Cullen, Esme Cullen, Xaldin, Xigbar, Alice Cullen, Rosalie Hale, Jasper Hale, Lexaeus, Emmett Cullen, and Saïx.
→Mentions: Xemnas.
Rating: G.
Spoilers: Breaking Dawn - Unknown chapter, presumably towards the end; KHII - Second visit to Land of Dragons
Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts, Twilight or any related characters. This was written out of enjoyment of the series, and no profit is being made.
Notes: Will the final part be made of as much fail as Breaking Dawn apparently is? Well, I wouldn't know, I don't intend to read it.
Thank you to all who have read to the end of my first-ever completed multi-chapter project! 8D (...Can you imagine if this fic had a blooper reel? I would never stop watching it.)
In which It All Comes Together in a Neat Little Package. Well, It Does. Sorry if I Sounded Sarcastic.
Circumstances of Heartbreaking Interest
Part 3
“Do you take sugar in your tea?” the vampire with the caramel hair and sticky-sweet smile asked.
Zexion observed from behind his bangs. It was a genuine kindness that shone in her gold eyes. It showed in the upwards curve of lips, the angle of her eyelids. “Yes, please,” he said. He leaned forward as Esme Cullen poured a spoonful into his cup and stirred.
Her husband smiled on the couch next to her as the two leaned back into the cushions. “I see your friend is a psychologist,” he addressed the scientist.
Vexen smiled. “I suppose you could say that.”
The ‘psychologist’ blinked. “Oh, my apologies. Am I analyzing body language again?”
Vexen shrugged. “It’s a force of habit. You’ve been doing it for two lifetimes now.”
“Yeah, man,” Xigbar spoke up. “Stop checking out the married lady.”
Zexion turned to look over the back of the couch. “You’re the one who flirted with an eighteen-year-old earlier today, Xigbar.”
The man sneered, taking his eyes off the chessboard. “I wasn’t serious about it. Geeze.” He picked up one of his white knights and moved it. “Your turn,” he addressed Xaldin, sitting across from him.
The vampire with the pixie cut, playing spectator, groaned. “Shouldn’t have done that.”
“Miss, if our method of playing chess, the one that doesn’t involve precognition, bothers you, you might as well leave. It’s the only method we have,” Xaldin said.
Zexion turned back. “Sorry about that. Where were we?”
“I was just wondering how your circulatory system works... You really don’t have a heartbeat?”
“No heart at all.”
“Do you mind if I...?” Dr. Cullen fingered his black doctor’s bag, sitting at his feet.
Vexen laughed. “Not at all.”
The vampire snapped the bag open and took out a stethoscope. He pressed the cold metal to Vexen’s white shirt (the Nobodies had chosen to unzip their jackets in the quiet of the house).
He grinned eagerly, like a child in Christmas Town. Vexen in particular smelled of cold metal and glass, breaking ice and thickening mist. Like an icebox and all the little wires and lights needed to run it. All within utter silence. Another species without a heartbeat. Fascinating.
He gave the ear buds to his wife, who also smiled. “Fascinating,” she echoed his thoughts. (Outside the polite atmosphere of the two couches, Xaldin made a particularly devastating move with a bishop. Alice Cullen offered a high-five, nodding her approval very seriously. She lowered it after Xaldin chose not to respond.)
“So let me get this straight. You don’t have hearts, but you still have blood?” asked the doctor.
“And all other fluids,” Zexion added, sipping his tea.
“It’s still mostly a mystery, I’m afraid to admit,” Vexen nodded. “We suspect most of our systems are built heavily upon magic.”
All the vampires in the room looked up at that, even the gorgeous blonde leaning against the glass window, waiting for her husband to return with Lexaeus. (She had silenced Xigbar with a single glare.) There was an uneasy silence that didn’t last long, as Jasper, the third blond (but really, who were the Nobodies to make comments about that?) Cullen descended the stairs. “We know that magic exists,” he explained as he walked into the living room. “We’re just not used to thinking of it that way.”
“Hmm,” Vexen nodded again. “Most of our powers are based purely in the physical realm. Except Zexion here.”
“‘Most’ being the key word, there, Vex.” Xigbar checked Alice’s face as his hand hovered over a rook, but her face remained blank. “I have powers over what we’ve decided is ‘space’, but we still haven’t found out what that means exactly.”
The Cullens collectively raised their eyebrows as the Freeshooter spoke. Xaldin spoke as he made his move. “He gets far too philosophical about it for his own good sometimes. Checkmate, by the way.”
Xigbar sat back in his chair, looking annoyed. “Pot calling the kettle black,” he grumbled, in response to the philosophy comment. Xaldin grinned.
Esme laughed softly. “Edward would be having a heyday, don’t you think, Jasper?”
“Hmm,” the young man smiled, albeit somewhat tightly, crossing his arms over his chest. “Five brilliant minds completely unaffected by emotion. And one that seems eerily similar to a werewolf.”
“Speaking of which...” Alice let her sentence drift off.
“Saïx heading back?” Vexen asked, mixing some honey into his tea.
“No... But he will, very soon.” She smiled widely at Xigbar. “I’m so ominous, aren’t I?”
“Xaldin, you have to at least let me take this one home. She’s too adorable.”
“No.”
“Is Emmett with them?” Jasper asked.
“Yes. Your brother wanted to test his strength against our friend’s,” Zexion answered. He smiled smugly. “I wonder how that turned out.”
The vampire smirked right back. “Would you like to make a bet?” Alice giggled.
“Doctor,” Vexen addressed Carlisle. “Once your son and our teammates return, it’d be best that we leave. If I can ask one last question-”
“Stop being so polite,” Esme smiled and placed a hand on her husband’s leg. The gold bands on their fingers glinted as he automatically closed his fingers around hers, a second nature.
Vexen smiled, suddenly uncomfortably aware of how much incredulity they had shown towards it privately. “Well, to be purely honest with you, we wonder why you sparkle.”
The Nobodies wished desperately for crickets to fill the silence, but nothing came.
“In sunlight,” Xigbar added helpfully.
“We know when we sparkle,” Rosalie spat at him.
“If we’re being impolite, just tell us,” Zexion stood up. The woman glared daggers at his peacekeeping attempt, so Alice intervened.
“It’s not impolite in the slightest. Sometimes it just sort of makes us feel like pansies.”
“Thank you,” Xigbar sighed. It was the least sarcastic thing he had said in ages.
Carlisle spoke before Alice or anyone else could respond. “It’s the venom, as I explained earlier. I haven’t been able to explore it thoroughly, but I’ll give you the best hypothesis I have. During the transformation, the venom hardens each skin cell. As far as I can tell, the effects of sunlight on our skin is caused by the hardening of each individual cell to the point that each cell acts as a... mirror. A facet.”
“...Remarkable.” Not even his companions could tell if Vexen was being sarcastic as he raised an eyebrow.
Carlisle half-smiled. “Mm. I would investigate it further, but I haven’t been able to collect a skin sample from myself. It’d be akin to trying to chip a diamond.”
“And the only thing that can chip a diamond is another diamond,” the Chilly Academic cringed at the thought. “I understand your reluctance.”
“Well! Now that that’s settled, it’s time to say goodbye,” Alice chirped, shaking Xaldin’s hand enthusiastically.
Before anyone could properly respond, the front door burst open. “Everyone. We’re leaving. Now.”
The Nobodies who were still seated were on their feet in a blink of an eye. “Lexaeus?”
“Where’s Emmett?” Rosalie strode forward easily, ready and willing to rip apart the Silent Hero to get to her husband.
Who came into the doorway two seconds later. “Right here, Rose. Geeze, two second delay, and I’m suddenly in mortal peril?”
The Nobodies zipped up their jackets as they saw the dark-haired vampire was carrying Saïx over his shoulder, convulsing with a barely-contained fury. “...Immortal peril?” Emmett wondered aloud as though he wasn’t carrying a highly dangerous berserker around on his shoulder.
“What happened?” Zexion asked.
“Went out into the woods to talk to the Quileutes, like dad said,” Emmett began.
“Unfortunately, there appears to be another breed of werewolf passing through the area,” Lexaeus added.
All the vampires snapped to attention. “Children of the Moon,” Jasper stated.
“Meaning?” Xaldin this time.
“Werewolves that transform under the influence of the full moon.”
There was a pause. “Wait. You mean there are breeds of werewolf that don’t follow that rule?” Vexen asked.
“Man, this place is weird. And I’ve seen weird,” Xigbar said.
“You must’ve. Your buddy here had a very interesting talk with them,” Emmett shrugged to indicate the blue-haired Nobody on his shoulder.
“We’ll just say the conversation upset both sides. Just,” Lexaeus lifted a hand as Zexion opened his mouth, “leave it at that.”
“We’re leaving when Saïx caused a problem?” Xigbar frowned. “That’s hardly fair, is it?”
“Xigbar, you cause problems in worlds and leave them unattended to all the time,” Xaldin scolded. “You’re just upset you didn’t get to hunt anything.”
“...Quiet, you.”
“Remember,” Lexaeus ignored that exchange, taking the still struggling Saïx onto his own shoulder, “upper cut to the jaw. Judging by the size of those wolves, it should just stun them. Besides, I’m not entirely sure how physiology works here, judging from what I’ve seen.”
Emmett’s laughter boomed off the walls. “Sure thing, buddy. Upper cut to the chin. Now take your weird werewolf pal and split.”
“Men,” Lexaeus announced to his old friends, and walked out the door towards the Gummi ship. Vexen and Zexion nodded politely to the doctor and his wife and the two blond ‘siblings’ before leaving. Xaldin did the same to Alice, while Xigbar just laughed and waved as he followed past her.
They crossed the lawn, the odd calm of battle approaching thick in the air. Lexaeus disappeared up the gangplank into the ship, his four companions following behind.
“So...” Vexen started. “What exactly are we going to say to the Superior about this world again?”
“Not nearly enough battle,” Xigbar grumped.
“Messed up science,” Xaldin scratched his nose.
Zexion shrugged. “The people seem interesting enough.” He looked over his shoulder, back towards the Cullen house. “I wouldn’t mind coming back to visit. Just as long as they don’t walk around calling each other ‘statues of Aphrodite or Adonis’ or something.”
---Epilogue---
And thus did the Cullen Family* proceed to kick some Children of the Moon butt. Emmett lead the attack with only Lexaeus’s ‘upper-cut to the chin’ strategy, and as we all know, was an utter badass about it.
*Minus their Manipulative Bastard™ Edward, who was still having a psychologically fascinating (and not the good kind) conversation with Bella back at the house.
Emmett was slightly disappointed, however, when the dust cleared and they all realized Esme had rendered the most werewolves unconscious.
Mama, after all, did say knock you out.
The End
SaïxKirk Thornton
XigbarJames Patrick Stuart
VexenDerek Stephen Prince
XaldinDavid Dayan Fisher
ZexionVincent Corazza
LexaeusDave Boat
Jacob BlackTaylor Lautner
Edward CullenRobert Pattinson
Bella SwanKristen Stewart
Carlisle CullenPeter Facinelli
Esme CullenElizabeth Reaser
Alice CullenAshley Greene
Rosalie HaleNikki Reed
Jasper HaleJackson Rathbone
Emmett CullenKellan Lutz
Much thanks to cygna_hime, sentienttoaster, animejosse and sparkism, for the encouragement to actually write this thing. xD
Part 2 ← Part 3
Chapter Listing