MINUTES. [Locked to Faculty, less Headmaster S. Snape & Professor S. Black]
UNOFFICIAL MINUTES OF THE FIRST STAFF MEETING OF 2007
MINUS ACTUAL MINUTES BECAUSE THAT'S FOR WANKERS.
All right, I think even though we only started taking House points from Sirius and Severus halfway through the meeting, the fake score of total House points taken stands at Sirius -87, Severus -93, but that's not taking into account the fact that Sirius' husband was helping take points and Severus' husband wasn't. Having written that, I think it's time I took my own life.
Much fun had by all, we plan to continue to take fake House points at all future meetings.
Faculty would like to move a vote of thanks to H. Slughorn for breaking up several pitched Severus-Sirius battles because D. Malfoy is a pansy and wouldn't do it himself (all love of course, Draco, but you RATHER are you know). In particular, however, Faculty requests H. Slughorn NOT ask Professor Binns to speak ever again, as at that point Faculty had to have a long drink from his flask to keep from falling asleep. At this time H. Granger moved that R. Black share the flask and showed decent tolerance for Moonshine Firewhiskey. Doubleproof. It's amazing she could walk, frankly. Suspect H. Slughorn of slipping her some Sober-up Potion.
Note-passing at tolerable levels throughout the evening. General request for knowledge of charm R. Lupin uses to flick paper invisibly across the table. Much call also for more razor wit from S. Trelawney, but rather less prediction of tragic deaths all round.
Meeting closed with hurling of insults, idle threats of sacking, smoothing of feathers, and great relief of Faculty.
Let it be noted that Headmaster S. Snape appears to require much soothing and significant amounts of alcohol after all meetings with Professor S. Black. (Addendum: Most people do.) Not to put too fine a point on it, I haven't got the gelt to spring for a huge dinner in Hogsmeade and listen to him complain every week, fun as it was. So, you lot'll have to pitch in with the Galleons or take him yourself in shifts. Unless it falls on Malfoy after tonight (rude of you to steal him, Remus) in which case I think we should all buy him some drugs as a coping mechanism or possibly to use on Severus.
MINUS ACTUAL MINUTES BECAUSE THAT'S FOR WANKERS.
All right, I think even though we only started taking House points from Sirius and Severus halfway through the meeting, the fake score of total House points taken stands at Sirius -87, Severus -93, but that's not taking into account the fact that Sirius' husband was helping take points and Severus' husband wasn't. Having written that, I think it's time I took my own life.
Much fun had by all, we plan to continue to take fake House points at all future meetings.
Faculty would like to move a vote of thanks to H. Slughorn for breaking up several pitched Severus-Sirius battles because D. Malfoy is a pansy and wouldn't do it himself (all love of course, Draco, but you RATHER are you know). In particular, however, Faculty requests H. Slughorn NOT ask Professor Binns to speak ever again, as at that point Faculty had to have a long drink from his flask to keep from falling asleep. At this time H. Granger moved that R. Black share the flask and showed decent tolerance for Moonshine Firewhiskey. Doubleproof. It's amazing she could walk, frankly. Suspect H. Slughorn of slipping her some Sober-up Potion.
Note-passing at tolerable levels throughout the evening. General request for knowledge of charm R. Lupin uses to flick paper invisibly across the table. Much call also for more razor wit from S. Trelawney, but rather less prediction of tragic deaths all round.
Meeting closed with hurling of insults, idle threats of sacking, smoothing of feathers, and great relief of Faculty.
Let it be noted that Headmaster S. Snape appears to require much soothing and significant amounts of alcohol after all meetings with Professor S. Black. (Addendum: Most people do.) Not to put too fine a point on it, I haven't got the gelt to spring for a huge dinner in Hogsmeade and listen to him complain every week, fun as it was. So, you lot'll have to pitch in with the Galleons or take him yourself in shifts. Unless it falls on Malfoy after tonight (rude of you to steal him, Remus) in which case I think we should all buy him some drugs as a coping mechanism or possibly to use on Severus.