Sanctuary of Regrets - Ch5
“My eyes!"
“Umma!”
It only took two familiar voices screaming to snap Yunho out of his slumber. With tousled hair and crumpled shirt, he ran out of his room. Wanting to know what the commotion was all about, he didn’t even bother putting his slippers on. “What’s going on?” He questioned, his voice cracking just a bit. He never had to wait for a worded answer though. Everything he needed to know was there, right before his eyes.
Jaejoong stood there, looking somewhat alarmed, clad in nothing but his underwear and a white tank top. “I can’t find my pants.”
Sure, the five of them had seen each other completely bare, but seeing the lead singer pacing around the apartment early in the morning certainly is attention nabbing. Seeing a nameless someone walking around in his underwear was startling enough, so imagine how astounded the whole apartment was when it was Jaejoong. Then again, the lead singer had been known to have his quirks, it was just they haven’t witnessed much of it lately.
“Aish, tone it down, you two. See? You’ve woken Yunho up.” Jaejoong lectured, shrugging off the kids´ reaction as he busied himself looking around.
Upon finding his tongue, Yunho finally had his say. “You could have worn something else on while looking for your missing pants.” It took him a great amount of will to focus his eyes on the blonde’s upper torso. He knew the dangers that Jaejoong held from his waist and down, having a few experiences of those dangers himself. If the leader didn’t know better, he would have thought Jaejoong was merely showing off his undeniably well-toned body. But every now and then, as he had learned, again thru experience, the lead singer would put his rationality aside.
The blonde singer turned to Yunho, his features contorted in guilt. “I’m sorry to have disturbed your sleep. I didn’t know anyone would be up at this time so…yeah. Good thing I didn’t come out naked.” Jaejoong snickered to himself.
Good thing, indeed, Yunho thought, or else, he would have lost the sanity he saved for the day. Out of the blue, it reminded the leader of how it was living with Jaejoong for the first week. He recalled almost getting a heart attack a few times when the still-raven-then Jaejoong came out of the bathroom, naked. The lead singer’s reason then was that he had forgotten to bring a towel with him.
Yunho couldn’t find the strength to laugh along when the blonde snickered as he was extremely, and he meant extremely, distracted when Jaejoong bended a little with his back facing him, unconsciously flashing his behind in the process. “Uhm… okay.” It was all he could mutter, making a silent wish that he didn’t appear so bothered, which to his dismay, he clearly was.
Once the leader returned to his room, Jaejoong turned to the two “You guys, you know he had a late night. He needed that sleep.” His tone was nowhere near mad but had guilt edging to it. “You didn’t have to over react, unless you were trying to wake him up on purpose.” Jaejoong wasn’t stupid and dense enough to fail noticing how Yunho took awkward steps back to his room. Of course, it was flattering that somehow, in some ways, he still had an effect on his ex-lover. But he didn’t want to linger on that thought, knowing that it would only raise his hopes up, which he could do without.
“Sorry.”
“We didn’t intend to wake anyone up. Well, at least I didn’t.” Changmin threw the guy by his side a doubtful joke-filled look filled.
“I didn’t do it on purpose!” Junsu waved his hand in protest.
The blonde nodded, knowing full well that the younger ones wouldn’t have the heart to do so. He just had to let his previous thought out to lighten the mood. “Junsu, didn’t you borrow my pants two weeks ago; the fly-buttoned one?”
“Yoochun burrowed it after I did.”
“Aish, I suppose I had to get another pair or two. Who wants to go shopping with me?”
Junsu and Changmin could only exchange looks, completely aware of what they would be getting themselves into if they were to offer their company while the eldest shop.
---
Try as he might, Yunho couldn’t go back to sleep. Not when images of a certain singer was constantly flashing in his mind whenever he closed his eyes. Twisting and turning on his bed didn’t do him good either. He felt beyond silly for having his thoughts occupied by his ex-lover that way, but what was he supposed to do? It obviously wasn’t his fault that visions of Jaejoong in his mighty bareness refused to leave him alone. He couldn’t help but note how smooth the lead singer appeared in his head, so smooth he could almost feel it. His previous experience with that infamous smoothness wasn’t helping him out of his current situation either.
Seeing that he’d no longer be getting any sleep, he opted to move on with his day and head for a shower. With a groan, he got up from the comfort of his bed, set his feet on the ground and let his feet roam for his slippers. He let out a sigh before heading to the bathroom, grabbing a towel on his way.
The cold tiled floor distracted him for a second before his previous thoughts of Jaejoong surfaced once again. He rid himself of his clothes, tossing them to the empty bin before stepping into shower. Truth be told, when Yunho stepped inside the bathroom, it never occurred to him that he would be that excited.
“Darn it.”
---
Jaejoong hadn’t gone shopping for a while now; hence, he was a little excited. But apparently, no one was willing to go with him. On normal circumstances, it would have been Yunho or Yoochun who’d accompany him. Unfortunately for the blonde, the two are unavailable at the moment. Yunho had a late meeting with their manager the previous night while his best friend had gone to bed just a few hours ago. His soul mate had, yet again, pulled another all nighter, writing a new song.
The blonde knew and admit how outrageous he could get if he was to be left shopping alone. Thus, as much as possible, he needed someone to pin him down even just a bit before he could go overboard not only in terms of quantity but also when it came down to style. So, Yoochun’s critique had always been handy whenever they were shopping together.
Sighing as he picked up the car key from his nightstand, he had silently decided that he was going alone this time. Once he had everything he needed, he planted a kiss on his sleeping roommate’s forehead before leaving the room. On his way out, he met the leader whose wet hair gave away that he just had a shower. “I thought you were sleeping?”
Yunho was a little startled at the question since he didn’t notice the blonde coming out of the other bedroom. “Oh, I can’t get to sleep.” Seeing no point in lying, he didn’t bother hiding the truth. Besides, saying so wouldn’t give Jaejoong the idea that his inability to sleep was all because of him.
“I’m really sorry for waking you up.” Worry was evident in Jaejoong’s face, his features softening in an instant. It was obviously his fault that the leader didn’t get his fair share of sleep. “I’m sorry.”
Yunho was truly touched at Jaejoong’s sincere apology. “It’s okay.” He smiled, wondering if Jaejoong knew that the crease of his eyebrows had always signaled the amount of sincerity he put into things. “Going out?” Yunho took a moment to look at the lead singer’s attire, sighing in relief that the blonde was completely covered.
“Yes. Shopping.” Jaejoong beamed, clearly thrilled at the mention of the last word, twirling the key ring ‘round and ‘round his finger. “I have to get going now.” He couldn’t remember feeling this much better for quite some time while talking to Yunho. He now felt so casual, so carefree and very himself around his ex-lover. Finally, although not completely, he got rid of that sick feeling in his stomach whenever Yunho was within his sight and of that fear to get too close to the leader.
“Take care.” Yunho watched Jaejoong’s back as the blonde went for the door, noting how his footsteps were quicker than his normal pace.
“Uhm…” Jaejoong turned back just before he took hold of the door knob. “Do you have time?” He had no time to contemplate much on his question. He thought there’d be no harm asking, he was just asking anyway, testing the waters as he did so. Since he felt cozy with Yunho once again, it might not be a bad idea to invite the guy to go shop. It wasn’t like they were going out on date, was it?
Trying to recall the day’s schedule, he averted his eyes to the floor for a better focus. “I do.”
Jaejoong’s face lit up. “Can you go shopping with me?” His was head tilted to the side as he stated his request.
It didn’t take Yunho more than a second to voice out his answer. “Let me get change and get my key.” He was about to retreat to his room, hoping that he didn’t sound so eager just now.
“Can we use my car?” Jaejoong would be lying if he’d claimed that the mention of Yunho’s car didn’t get his heart thumping for a few seconds. It was just that so many things had happened there and he found himself not quite ready to reminisce those moments. Lifting himself back to the ground, he told himself that in time, he’ll be ready for those and even laugh about the silly things they had done; in time. “Or we could just meet at the mall.”
“Let’s use your car.” Yunho suggested before finally disappearing to his bedroom, not wanting to reckon why he went for the first option.
---
Wherever Jaejoong went, Yunho followed. It was almost like when they were still together, almost. Unlike before, Yunho could no longer casually drape an arm over Jaejoong’s shoulder as they strut from one boutique to another. It was a friendly manner that never brought them at the end of people’s suspicion. Plus, they had never let the skin ship linger on for a long time.
They were now on the seventh store where Jaejoong had picked to sets of outfits to try on. He took two pairs of pants, one colored and the other was denim, and two tops, one was stripped long sleeved while the other was a white printed shirt. Just before entering the fitting room, he spotted a scarf that was to his liking. When he was contented with the items at hand, he went behind the curtain covered fitting room.
While the blonde was busy pimping himself, Yunho was roaming around the store just to keep himself busy while he effortlessly carried the shopping bags. Every now end then, his eyes would follow the lead singer as if he Jaejoong was just about to do something drastic. He can put a finger on what gave him that idea, he just got a feeling and that was it. Yunho’s instinct deemed impeccable as his eyes got glued to the fitting room which was left ajar. To his horror, the curtain, which was supposedly stretched from side to side to cover the occupant of the cubicle, was pushed a little to the side, revealing quite a view of the person inside.
Before Yunho could register it, he was running to Jaejoong’s aid, who by the way, was revealing more than what he’d love the public to see. Apparently, Jaejoong was too preoccupied to notice what the leader had witnessed. For the same reason, the blonde didn’t notice when Yunho came to fix the mishap and accidentally peeked inside when the leader was pulling the curtain to its rightful place. He let out a deep sigh, thanking the heavens that the boutique was next to empty, the sales ladies weren’t nosy and the two of them were the only customers at the moment. It was a good thing that he was the one who saw the blonde while changing and not one of the staff, well, maybe not.
As Yunho stood on guard by the cubicle, he failed to hinder the images that had been trying to get into his head. He felt oh so pathetic to be seeing Jaejoong’s bare form in his mind’s eyes. It was as if fate had been mocking him that of all the things he could witness, of all the things his eyes could land on, it happened to be Jaejoong’s wonders. It wasn’t that he didn’t like what he had seen. It was just that Jaejoong was a sight to see and that was what caused Yunho’s little misery. He was so miserable that he almost blamed the blonde for being so fair, so smooth looking, so attention grabbing, and so damn enticing without even trying. His train of thoughts was being one hell of a ride, failing him to notice Jaejoong until the lead singer made his presence known.
“Is this okay?” Jaejoong asked as he pushed the curtain to the side while looking himself up and down through the mirror. “Yunho?” He found Yunho rooted on the ground, giving him the idea that he was wasting the leader’s precious time. “Am I boring you? I’m sorry I dragged you here.”
“What? No, that’s not it.” Alarmed, Yunho forced himself to snap out of his daze. He was aware of how Jaejoong could be too hard on himself at times, blaming himself albeit he wasn’t at fault. “I’m hungry. I just realized I haven’t had my breakfast.” He made up a logical excuse, which wasn’t completely made up at all. He had been too eager to go out with the blonde that breakfast slipped his mind. Besides, he wasn’t used to heavy morning meals; a cup of coffee was all he needed to jumpstart his day.
“I haven’t been to Starbucks lately, do you like it there? My treat.” Jaejoong was still looking himself up and down as he asked.
“Anywhere would fine.” The leader answered, facing the other way. He was finding it hard to face the blonde in the same way he find it hard not to inspect him up and down after having weird thoughts about him.
“You really are that hungry?” Jaejoong chuckled. “Should I get this?”
“Uhm…” Yunho hesitated for a while before awkwardly checking how Jaejoong looked. Trying to judge the outfit without his previous thoughts interfering appeared to be an excruciating move. “I think it would do without the scarf.”
“You think so?” The blonde turned, checking himself out one last time. “Okay, I’ll get this one before we head to Starbucks. Ah, I should bring home some for the boys as well. Chun must be starving.” He slid the curtain back into place before he started changing back to his clothes.
“I thought we’re dining in.” The leader asked, making sure there curtain was perfectly obscuring the other guy.
“Well I -” Biting his lip, Jaejoong was glad Yunho wasn’t there to witness his slight uneasiness. As much as he didn’t want to be in Yunho’s car, he feared that eating with Yunho alone would bring memories back; those memories that he’d rather forget for now. Although it would be a simple breakfast, he still found it unsettling though he must admit he won’t mind eating with the other members alone. But it was different with Yunho, but of course. “We better eat at home. Chun might be awake now, I don’t want to keep him waiting.”
“Okay.” Slight disappointment colored Yunho’s tone just now. He wasn’t dense and he could tell that Jaejoong didn’t like the sound of breakfast alone with him. He knew where the blonde was coming from though, and he understood it well. Perhaps, the lead singer was just trying to point out where the fine line between friends and lovers stood. But still, it saddened him. Moreover, Jaejoong had been putting a lot, if not all, his attention to Yoochun; that very same attention Jaejoong had used to give him and him alone; that attention that was used to be his, only his.
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A/N: I need a beta for this fic. If anyone's interested, send me a message so we could negotiate.♥
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