ficlet: "Iron Man =/= Ironman."
possibly this concept has been ficced already when I wasn't looking.
title: IRON MAN =/= IRONMAN.
author: plasticity.
rating: pg.
~800 words, movieverse Tony & Pepper. vaguely cracky fluff.
****
"I mean, you're not exactly as young as some of these guys-"
"'Some of these guys' *gasp* don't have an alternative to nuclear energy *gasp* implanted in their chests *gasp*."
"Oh, honestly, Tony, it's keeping shrapnel from your heart, not giving you super-strength. It's probably restricting your lungs from expanding all the way, if you think about it medically, because it's not like it's a standard thing to have a giant canister bored through your sternum-"
He grabbed the water bottle she had been holding out for him with as much of a scowl as he could fit in around his great heaving gulps of air. Pepper took the opportunity to consult her clipboard. "Now, you've made up some of the ground you lost in the swim-"
"Technically, wouldn't I be *gasp* making up ocean, then?"
"-but, while you're not in last place, you're, um. Pretty far down there."
"Where exactly, Potts."
"...Ninety-second place. But you're in front of Richards! And, uh, Steve finished first, if you wanted to know."
"Steve's done already?! Dammit."
She uncapped her highlighter and added another streak of yellow across the blow-up of the marathon route. She didn't want to tell him, but the biggest hills were just around the bend; keep him hoping for at least another five minutes. Long-term vision wasn't one of Tony's great strengths, but sometimes that narrow focus led to greater bursts of energy in the present. It had worked when she lied to him during the cycling, anyway, although at the next stop he had some choice curses all stored up in that massive brain of his.
"*gasp* Where's Rhodey?" He snagged the other bottle she held as well, dumped it across his head. His microfiber muscle shirt, emblazoned with his trademarked IRON MAN logo (available in finer stores and boutiques! pick yours up today!), was already soaked through, the manufacturer-cut chest hole sagging with sweat. If Pepper were honest with herself, he wasn't looking so good. His skin was clammy and his legs trembled a bit; and was it just the bright light, or was the arc reactor itself looking a little dim? She surreptitiously jotted down a note to have his top engineers look into it on the sly.
"James ran into some of his air force superiors, he's with them near the finish line."
"He's done too?! You know, I'm sponsoring this damn race, *gasp* the least they could do is let me win it."
Pepper decided not to reveal that all the participants were already holding back, as per written request and the large bribes advised by Rhodes. "You've got about thirteen miles left, which is nothing compared to what you've already swum and biked. But, um... just so you know, they do have a time limit on the contest."
He bent over and put his hands on his knees. "How long do I have?"
She winced. "An hour."
A pregnant pause. "An hour for thirteen miles."
She eyed the still line of his back, biting her lip. "Um. Yeah."
Another pause, then he seemed to come to a decision and straightened. "Right, then. Get my suit." His eyes gleamed.
"What?! Tony-!" He was already looking past her, bouncing with renewed energy. "Tony, you can't use your suit."
"Why not? I'm Iron Man. It's what I do." Bounce.
"Using your suit to cheat at a sports contest is not the same thing as blowing up terrorists!"
"It's not cheating! It's using all my resources. How do you think I got this far in life in the first place?" He waved off her open-mouthed expression of shock. "No, I get it, you think it's too high profile. So I'll tell you what." He grabbed her clipboard, scanned the topography. "Have it waiting here, in the next patch of woods. I'll just duck in, then fly this way, land, hmm, how about here, what is that, half a mile from the finish, and then I'll just leave it with you again and run the rest of the way. No one will know. I'll be sneaky. Scout's honor." He laid his right hand across his arc reactor.
"Tony. No."
"Do it, Pepper. That's an order, from your boss." He shoved the clipboard back into her hands.
"Tony-!"
"Pepper. I have to do this. I have to finish. I'm Iron Man. I need to finish this race." He gave her the earnest dark-eyed expression she'd seen way too often since his return from Afghanistan, and even though she was beginning to suspect he knew exactly how easily it manipulated her, she still wilted. He saw the defeat in her eyes, nodded once, and staggered into a lope, calling over his shoulder, "Remind me to give you a raise, Potts!"
"I'm still reminding you for the last time," she called to his retreating form, then sighed and took out her blackberry.
******
title: IRON MAN =/= IRONMAN.
author: plasticity.
rating: pg.
~800 words, movieverse Tony & Pepper. vaguely cracky fluff.
****
"I mean, you're not exactly as young as some of these guys-"
"'Some of these guys' *gasp* don't have an alternative to nuclear energy *gasp* implanted in their chests *gasp*."
"Oh, honestly, Tony, it's keeping shrapnel from your heart, not giving you super-strength. It's probably restricting your lungs from expanding all the way, if you think about it medically, because it's not like it's a standard thing to have a giant canister bored through your sternum-"
He grabbed the water bottle she had been holding out for him with as much of a scowl as he could fit in around his great heaving gulps of air. Pepper took the opportunity to consult her clipboard. "Now, you've made up some of the ground you lost in the swim-"
"Technically, wouldn't I be *gasp* making up ocean, then?"
"-but, while you're not in last place, you're, um. Pretty far down there."
"Where exactly, Potts."
"...Ninety-second place. But you're in front of Richards! And, uh, Steve finished first, if you wanted to know."
"Steve's done already?! Dammit."
She uncapped her highlighter and added another streak of yellow across the blow-up of the marathon route. She didn't want to tell him, but the biggest hills were just around the bend; keep him hoping for at least another five minutes. Long-term vision wasn't one of Tony's great strengths, but sometimes that narrow focus led to greater bursts of energy in the present. It had worked when she lied to him during the cycling, anyway, although at the next stop he had some choice curses all stored up in that massive brain of his.
"*gasp* Where's Rhodey?" He snagged the other bottle she held as well, dumped it across his head. His microfiber muscle shirt, emblazoned with his trademarked IRON MAN logo (available in finer stores and boutiques! pick yours up today!), was already soaked through, the manufacturer-cut chest hole sagging with sweat. If Pepper were honest with herself, he wasn't looking so good. His skin was clammy and his legs trembled a bit; and was it just the bright light, or was the arc reactor itself looking a little dim? She surreptitiously jotted down a note to have his top engineers look into it on the sly.
"James ran into some of his air force superiors, he's with them near the finish line."
"He's done too?! You know, I'm sponsoring this damn race, *gasp* the least they could do is let me win it."
Pepper decided not to reveal that all the participants were already holding back, as per written request and the large bribes advised by Rhodes. "You've got about thirteen miles left, which is nothing compared to what you've already swum and biked. But, um... just so you know, they do have a time limit on the contest."
He bent over and put his hands on his knees. "How long do I have?"
She winced. "An hour."
A pregnant pause. "An hour for thirteen miles."
She eyed the still line of his back, biting her lip. "Um. Yeah."
Another pause, then he seemed to come to a decision and straightened. "Right, then. Get my suit." His eyes gleamed.
"What?! Tony-!" He was already looking past her, bouncing with renewed energy. "Tony, you can't use your suit."
"Why not? I'm Iron Man. It's what I do." Bounce.
"Using your suit to cheat at a sports contest is not the same thing as blowing up terrorists!"
"It's not cheating! It's using all my resources. How do you think I got this far in life in the first place?" He waved off her open-mouthed expression of shock. "No, I get it, you think it's too high profile. So I'll tell you what." He grabbed her clipboard, scanned the topography. "Have it waiting here, in the next patch of woods. I'll just duck in, then fly this way, land, hmm, how about here, what is that, half a mile from the finish, and then I'll just leave it with you again and run the rest of the way. No one will know. I'll be sneaky. Scout's honor." He laid his right hand across his arc reactor.
"Tony. No."
"Do it, Pepper. That's an order, from your boss." He shoved the clipboard back into her hands.
"Tony-!"
"Pepper. I have to do this. I have to finish. I'm Iron Man. I need to finish this race." He gave her the earnest dark-eyed expression she'd seen way too often since his return from Afghanistan, and even though she was beginning to suspect he knew exactly how easily it manipulated her, she still wilted. He saw the defeat in her eyes, nodded once, and staggered into a lope, calling over his shoulder, "Remind me to give you a raise, Potts!"
"I'm still reminding you for the last time," she called to his retreating form, then sighed and took out her blackberry.
******