NOT a mathom...
THE GRAND ANNUAL
FOUR FARTHINGS SHOW
Title:The Grand Annual Four Farthings Show
Characters: Half the population of the Shire, mostly not individuated; OCs galore
Pairing: If you don’t know by now, we’re both wasting your time
Genre: Hobbit Social History/AU. (With a hint of Romance; you guessed?)
Rating: Boringly G for the most part; the last may be more exciting, though
Slash? Well, now, what do you think?
Summary: GAFFS lasts for days - but Frodo has never wanted to stay over before…
Warnings: Lengthy Disquisitions, more than a modicum of Artistic Licence and a healthy dose of Schmoop to come (as it were). Copious A/N, with gratuitous urls revealing total research freakery. Oh, and Food - in quantity and on one notable occasion as something of an impromptu fashion item.
Not recommended for vegetarians. May contain traces of nuts.
One part will have a possible Squick-maker Extraordinaire which cannot be classified under any of the usual headings, and is probably completely apocryphal, anyway (it does not affect either of our heroes. Except indirectly. And transiently.) In which case, I can only advise any stray male who may be reading to steer clear, or at the least to read with one sympathetic hand guarding a particularly valued portion of his anatomy.
*whisper* First Time
Feedback: would be gratefully received, especially if you note some factual inaccuracy/typos I may need to address, even AU being no excuse for such!
A/N
GAFFS is completely AU (except for the love between Frodo and Sam which is, of course, RL.) The idea been done before by others, and probably better - there is nothing new in the Shire, after all. But Write what you know, they say.
So, this takes my many years of exhibiting at agricultural shows, both local and national; gleans a few gems from a plethora of research into Victorian travelling fairs and the existence of fairground rides before the common use of steam (of which JRRT patently did not approve and I have therefore not permitted here); combines therewith traditional (and some not so) songs from the rural English folk scene, regional breeds of livestock (some, regrettably, now extinct) plus games and sports both country current and Tolkien originals (and one which may be apocryphal, as noted); also many crafts and skills of the dead or vanishing sorts. All of these are, of course, wrapped in a deal of personal and undisguised nostalgia.
I have included urls for many of the items that may be unfamiliar to a modern reader; these are currently available as of July 2012. Thank heavens for Wayback - so many of them were no longer accessible otherwise!
There should be adduced a certain amount of authorial leeway, but I offer up this tale with a great deal of respect for Tolkien’s Shire and for hobbits in general; but mostly with infinite love for Frodo and Sam. And Elijah and Sean… *puddle*
I was not going to include a merry-go-round/carousel, but Someone voiced a desire to draw Frodo, his hair flying in the wind, laughing as he sweeps by *taps foot meaningfully* (for myself, I have a great desire for him to be riding tandem with Sam - and really, really enjoying it… They, of course, have The Great Desire)
There were horse-powered dobby sets (which is the correct term) though there could be only forward motion, not vertical. Had you been blessed with great wealth, the year I started to write GAFFS, you might have purchased what was believed to be the last surviving one. Site and all have vanished, but that page is useful also for Traveller vans
With much love and thanks for sharing the slog to Notabluemaia andbeatriceorme
NB I did try to find a synonym for the Joywheel which would make it sound a little less like a rather challenging and possibly risky sex toy… But in a more innocent age, that was its name!
ETA: Adding the pic to Gaffs Eve has made the text too long to fit in one post - hence the Prologue may now be found separately, here:
The Three-Farthing Stone is, by common consent, as near to the centre of the Shire as makes no difference; thus, by long custom, those fields between the Stone and the East Road are set aside to common ownership as the only possible place to hold the Grand Annual Four Farthings Show. This mouthful has been affectionately reduced by all to GAFFS, since a long ago recording clerk tired of inscribing the whole in his elegantly flourished but terribly time-consuming copperplate.
In mid-Wedmath there may be a pause from harvesting. With much gathered safely in, more to come and a deal to be thankful for, Shire folk bring the fruits of their diverse labours, and come along to mark their successes, test their strengths, compare their livestock - and simply to enjoy themselves.
Hobbits journey from every town and village of the Shire, and the residents of Bywater and Hobbiton - the two nearest villages - have grown very used to their sudden annual popularity with relatives from the outflung corners. Those who have spent days on the road are reluctant, once they arrive, to sleep longer under canvas; for why should they disburse funds for a place to lie, when they have kin upon whose sense of duty they may prevail? And at inns and alehouses for miles around, the sadly unrelated take rooms for all three days, thus more than compensating the proprietors for their losses to the beer tent on the Showground. Indeed, accommodation is in such great demand (lest the weather be less than clement) that those with an eye to profit rather than blood tie or friendship are known to let out mere spaces on the floor of smial, cottage, barn or mill.
Those with livestock to show may set off from home - or send them off in the charge of a trusted herdhobbit - as much as a week or two in advance. A leisurely journey along the drove lanes means that they arrive in good condition and well-fed - hobbits as well as stock, for fodder is still plentiful along the way for the latter, and there are wild fruits (and especially early mushrooms) aplenty for their guardians. Owners and herders alike appreciate this change in their day-to-day lives and the unaccustomed freedom of the road; it is enjoyable for its novelty for once in a while though the comforts of home are greatly to be preferred in the long run (and most particularly when it rains on their travels).
Half the inhabitants of the Shire will be present at the Show - and the half necessarily left at home will have arranged for the product of their labours to be represented still, brought along by some luckier neighbour. Everyone wishes to play a part, however small, and a rosette brought home proxy is an accolade to be treasured nonetheless. The fortunate moiety often travel in groups, in strings, in convoys and in caravan - by wagon or cart or living van, with pack or with hand-cart, mounted or on foot - all of them converging on this one point, just a little to the south of the Great East Road.
For one week of Wedmath, these fields are abuzz with activity that unfurls a creeping mantle of great tents, small booths, and livestock penning in varying sizes and strengths. An outdoor kitchen is erected, and the fire-pit readied for the last evening’s celebratory roast. At the centre of all is the wide oval show ring, large enough to accommodate several classes at once; and a large quantity of straw bales sits snugly under cover to provide seating for the spectators and bedding for the exhibits besides. Further out, shorn fields await sheepdog trials or ploughing matches, or simply to accommodate the varied means of transportation that will bring the many visitors.
Should an eagle pause in his flight, the Shire might somewhat resemble a wide and tenuous spider web, its crowded roads and lanes and green ways running inexorably now, all to this one thrumming centre - the Grand Annual Four Farthings Show.
~~~
For Show's Eve, click the pic!
~~~
FOUR FARTHINGS SHOW
Title:The Grand Annual Four Farthings Show
Characters: Half the population of the Shire, mostly not individuated; OCs galore
Pairing: If you don’t know by now, we’re both wasting your time
Genre: Hobbit Social History/AU. (With a hint of Romance; you guessed?)
Rating: Boringly G for the most part; the last may be more exciting, though
Slash? Well, now, what do you think?
Summary: GAFFS lasts for days - but Frodo has never wanted to stay over before…
Warnings: Lengthy Disquisitions, more than a modicum of Artistic Licence and a healthy dose of Schmoop to come (as it were). Copious A/N, with gratuitous urls revealing total research freakery. Oh, and Food - in quantity and on one notable occasion as something of an impromptu fashion item.
Not recommended for vegetarians. May contain traces of nuts.
One part will have a possible Squick-maker Extraordinaire which cannot be classified under any of the usual headings, and is probably completely apocryphal, anyway (it does not affect either of our heroes. Except indirectly. And transiently.) In which case, I can only advise any stray male who may be reading to steer clear, or at the least to read with one sympathetic hand guarding a particularly valued portion of his anatomy.
*whisper* First Time
Feedback: would be gratefully received, especially if you note some factual inaccuracy/typos I may need to address, even AU being no excuse for such!
A/N
GAFFS is completely AU (except for the love between Frodo and Sam which is, of course, RL.) The idea been done before by others, and probably better - there is nothing new in the Shire, after all. But Write what you know, they say.
So, this takes my many years of exhibiting at agricultural shows, both local and national; gleans a few gems from a plethora of research into Victorian travelling fairs and the existence of fairground rides before the common use of steam (of which JRRT patently did not approve and I have therefore not permitted here); combines therewith traditional (and some not so) songs from the rural English folk scene, regional breeds of livestock (some, regrettably, now extinct) plus games and sports both country current and Tolkien originals (and one which may be apocryphal, as noted); also many crafts and skills of the dead or vanishing sorts. All of these are, of course, wrapped in a deal of personal and undisguised nostalgia.
I have included urls for many of the items that may be unfamiliar to a modern reader; these are currently available as of July 2012. Thank heavens for Wayback - so many of them were no longer accessible otherwise!
There should be adduced a certain amount of authorial leeway, but I offer up this tale with a great deal of respect for Tolkien’s Shire and for hobbits in general; but mostly with infinite love for Frodo and Sam. And Elijah and Sean… *puddle*
I was not going to include a merry-go-round/carousel, but Someone voiced a desire to draw Frodo, his hair flying in the wind, laughing as he sweeps by *taps foot meaningfully* (for myself, I have a great desire for him to be riding tandem with Sam - and really, really enjoying it… They, of course, have The Great Desire)
There were horse-powered dobby sets (which is the correct term) though there could be only forward motion, not vertical. Had you been blessed with great wealth, the year I started to write GAFFS, you might have purchased what was believed to be the last surviving one. Site and all have vanished, but that page is useful also for Traveller vans
With much love and thanks for sharing the slog to Notabluemaia andbeatriceorme
NB I did try to find a synonym for the Joywheel which would make it sound a little less like a rather challenging and possibly risky sex toy… But in a more innocent age, that was its name!
ETA: Adding the pic to Gaffs Eve has made the text too long to fit in one post - hence the Prologue may now be found separately, here:
The Three-Farthing Stone is, by common consent, as near to the centre of the Shire as makes no difference; thus, by long custom, those fields between the Stone and the East Road are set aside to common ownership as the only possible place to hold the Grand Annual Four Farthings Show. This mouthful has been affectionately reduced by all to GAFFS, since a long ago recording clerk tired of inscribing the whole in his elegantly flourished but terribly time-consuming copperplate.
In mid-Wedmath there may be a pause from harvesting. With much gathered safely in, more to come and a deal to be thankful for, Shire folk bring the fruits of their diverse labours, and come along to mark their successes, test their strengths, compare their livestock - and simply to enjoy themselves.
Hobbits journey from every town and village of the Shire, and the residents of Bywater and Hobbiton - the two nearest villages - have grown very used to their sudden annual popularity with relatives from the outflung corners. Those who have spent days on the road are reluctant, once they arrive, to sleep longer under canvas; for why should they disburse funds for a place to lie, when they have kin upon whose sense of duty they may prevail? And at inns and alehouses for miles around, the sadly unrelated take rooms for all three days, thus more than compensating the proprietors for their losses to the beer tent on the Showground. Indeed, accommodation is in such great demand (lest the weather be less than clement) that those with an eye to profit rather than blood tie or friendship are known to let out mere spaces on the floor of smial, cottage, barn or mill.
Those with livestock to show may set off from home - or send them off in the charge of a trusted herdhobbit - as much as a week or two in advance. A leisurely journey along the drove lanes means that they arrive in good condition and well-fed - hobbits as well as stock, for fodder is still plentiful along the way for the latter, and there are wild fruits (and especially early mushrooms) aplenty for their guardians. Owners and herders alike appreciate this change in their day-to-day lives and the unaccustomed freedom of the road; it is enjoyable for its novelty for once in a while though the comforts of home are greatly to be preferred in the long run (and most particularly when it rains on their travels).
Half the inhabitants of the Shire will be present at the Show - and the half necessarily left at home will have arranged for the product of their labours to be represented still, brought along by some luckier neighbour. Everyone wishes to play a part, however small, and a rosette brought home proxy is an accolade to be treasured nonetheless. The fortunate moiety often travel in groups, in strings, in convoys and in caravan - by wagon or cart or living van, with pack or with hand-cart, mounted or on foot - all of them converging on this one point, just a little to the south of the Great East Road.
For one week of Wedmath, these fields are abuzz with activity that unfurls a creeping mantle of great tents, small booths, and livestock penning in varying sizes and strengths. An outdoor kitchen is erected, and the fire-pit readied for the last evening’s celebratory roast. At the centre of all is the wide oval show ring, large enough to accommodate several classes at once; and a large quantity of straw bales sits snugly under cover to provide seating for the spectators and bedding for the exhibits besides. Further out, shorn fields await sheepdog trials or ploughing matches, or simply to accommodate the varied means of transportation that will bring the many visitors.
Should an eagle pause in his flight, the Shire might somewhat resemble a wide and tenuous spider web, its crowded roads and lanes and green ways running inexorably now, all to this one thrumming centre - the Grand Annual Four Farthings Show.
~~~
For Show's Eve, click the pic!
~~~